Chapter Five

 

 

When Ryan was a kid, his grandparents used to take him to a place along the river near where he lived. They would fish, and Ryan would run and play and climb the rocks. When it was warm, he would take a dip in the river and cool off. His grandmother would set up a picnic for them in a little cove that was closed off from the elements. She was a wonderful cook, and those were some of the best times Ryan had ever known. He hadn’t been there since the summer he turned fourteen, when his grandpa died. He thought about going back sometimes, but it was one of those places that he wanted to go with people he loved.

In his dream, he and Annie were there, and it was nighttime. They had eaten their picnic dinner and were lying on their backs, looking up at the stars. He was pointing out the constellations to her, making up stories about them, and she was laughing at his silly jokes. Impulsively, he sat up and said, “I’m hot. I think I’ll go for a swim. Wanna join me?”

“I didn’t bring a swimsuit,” Annie said.

Ryan had already started undressing. “You don’t need a swimsuit,” he told her. “I didn’t bring one.”

Annie gave him a strange look. “Are you going in your underwear?”

“Nope. I’m going in the buff.”

He was already stripped down to his boxers. He grinned at her and vaulted over the rocks that separated them from the river. He took his boxers off then, realizing even in his dream that he was taking a bold risk. He splashed around after he waded in, trying to get her attention. Finally, he saw her stand up and look over the rocks.

“It’s refreshing,” he told her. “You should come in. You won’t regret it.”

“Naked?” she said. “No thanks.”

“Then just leave your bra and panties on. They cover the same as a bikini, right?”

The top of her head disappeared. A few minutes later, she reappeared, and to his surprise she wore only a red lacy bra and a pair of tiny red panties. She was round and beautiful the way she used to be. She still had those curves he loved. Her sweet belly looked the way he’d always imagined. Soft. Welcoming.

“So you’re coming in?” he said.

“No, I just felt like standing around in my underwear.”

“I’m okay with that, too,” he told her with a grin.

Annie stuck her tongue out and headed toward the water. She looked gorgeous in the moonlight, and it was all he could do to keep from swimming over and taking her into his arms. She waded in slowly, and as he went toward her, she said, “No. You stay back, Mr. Naked.”

“Aw, come on, Annie,” Ryan said with a pout. “I just want one little kiss.”

“Stay back!” she hollered, splashing in his direction.

He continued toward her as she splashed him, growing bolder with each stroke. The distance between them lessened and his cock swelled against the rush of the water.

“I’m not kidding,” she said, but she was laughing.

Ryan grabbed at her, and she took a step back, stumbled and fell into the water. Ryan dived under and carried her back to the surface.

“Oh God, Annie. I’m so sorry!” he said, feeling terrible for making her fall. He thought she was crying. Her shoulders were shaking, and her hair was hanging down in her face. She pushed it back over her shoulders, and he could see then that she was laughing. He was so relieved that, without even thinking about it, he kissed her.

It wasn’t a friendly kiss. It was a hard kiss, one that would have turned passionate had it lasted a few seconds longer. She pulled back, and he could see the rise and fall of her chest.

“I’m sorry—”

“I’m not,” she said, then covered his mouth with hers.

Ryan’s heart beat faster with excitement and he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into him. He couldn’t believe he was holding her this close, his naked chest pressing against her wet, scantily clad body. After all this time, she’d kissed him. She wanted him.

Her hard nipples strained against the material of her bra, and his erection pressed against her smooth thigh. Her lips parted slightly, and he took it as an invitation. Snaking his tongue into her warm mouth, he began his exploration. Her tongue began to move as well, tangling with his as he ran his hands up and down the silky, wet skin of her back. He grazed the strap of her bra, unsure what his next move should be.

Annie took that decision out of his hands. She reached up and unhooked the front clasp of her bra.

Ryan broke the kiss to watch as her gorgeous breasts spilled out of the red bra, nipples as hard as the pebbles in the river under his feet. He bent her back slightly and pulled her forward so he could latch on to her turgid nipple.

Annie shivered and arched her back to give him better access. Ryan sucked hungrily, running his tongue around her nipple as he did. He slid his hand down the small of her back to grab one ass cheek and knead it. Annie moaned and her hips jerked. She gripped his wet hair, pushing him into her chest…urging him on. He slowly brought his leg up and let it settle between hers. He could feel the heat emanating from her pussy as he pressed against her mound. One of her hands dropped to his chest, and her fingernails trailed lightly down the hard muscle, down over his stomach and slowly toward his—

The blare of the alarm jolted Ryan awake. For a minute, he stared at the ceiling, chest heaving and body aching badly for Annie’s touch.

Fuck, he remembered this. The dreams. The feelings of frustration and longing for something he’d never have. He’d lived with them all for years before he’d finally accepted that Annie just didn’t feel the same way about him. That had been back in high school. Or at least college. Hell, maybe he hadn’t truly accepted it until a couple of years ago.

But the point was, he eventually had, and he’d done it before he’d done something stupid, like telling her how he felt.

Bullet dodged.

It had all worked out in the end.

Even if Annie had been attracted to him and they’d acted on their feelings, he would have eventually disappointed her. Hurt her. As time had revealed, Ryan had a hard time committing, whether it was to a major in college, a career, or a romantic relationship. On the other hand, he’d never had a problem committing to his friends, probably because he gravitated to friendships that were easy.

Annie’s friendship was by far the easiest thing he’d ever committed to.

So why now? Why was he suddenly right back where he’d started—wanting Annie so much it hurt?

Oh, right.

Her naughty list.

The kiss.

The smoking hot phone sex.

Groaning, Ryan closed his eyes and dug his palms into his eye sockets.

It had taken him hours to fall asleep after their phone call last night, and the only reason it had finally happened was because he’d given in and jacked off.

To fantasies of Annie.

With a groan, he sat up in his bed and blearily glanced at the clock on the nightstand. Five in the morning. He had forty-five minutes until he needed to meet his friend Cole at the gym to work out. Cole lived in LA and, along with their friend Luke, ran a private security business called Frontline Inc. They were getting busier and busier, to the point they were thinking of opening a second office in San Francisco. Cole had spent the past few days meeting with potential clients, and they’d agreed to work out today before he headed back south.

Ryan blew out a breath. The last thing he felt like doing right now was hitting the weights. But it wasn’t like he could do what he really wanted to do either.

He glanced down at the hardened tent pole lifting the sheets. God, that dream he’d had of Annie had been relatively tame, but his continued state of arousal since that sexy phone call last night was bordering on ludicrous. Even though he’d tried to keep some distance between them by pretending he was acting as her fantasy man, Kyle, Ryan’s body hadn’t been fooled. The sound of her breathing and moaning and clearly getting off had revived his sexual fantasies about her big-time.

He could still hear her husky voice as she’d told him how she was touching herself. Could still hear her whimpers as she’d following his instructions to touch her breasts, tug her nipples, finger-fuck herself.

She’d been sexy as hell. And when she’d suggested that he go back to her apartment to be even naughtier with her, he’d already been reaching for his keys before he’d forced himself to freeze.

She was obviously going through a vulnerable time in her life—testing out those “waters”—but Ryan wasn’t who or what she really wanted, otherwise she wouldn’t have propositioned him for the very first time on the eve of her bang-a-stranger-in-Vegas trip. And after he’d helped her get off to her fantasy man, Kyle.

Who the fuck was Kyle?

If he’d gone back to her apartment, he’d have been a stand-in for her fantasy guy, a convenience, no more than a warm-blooded sex toy. Not what he wanted from her and certainly not worth risking their friendship over.

So he’d ended up rejecting her instead.

“Fuck,” he murmured as he rose out of bed and headed to the bathroom.

He leaned against the bathroom sink and stared blurry-eyed at his reflection. “You’d better not have fucked up the one good relationship you’ve ever had, Hennessey,” he said.

An hour later, he managed to make it to the gym and onto a treadmill next to the one that Cole was running on. Around them, men and women were lifting weights, running on the assorted cardio machines, and punching sand bags. This was a serious gym and Cole was a focused exercise partner. Because he was a private bodyguard, staying fit was just an extension of who he was, the same way it was for Ryan.

“Have you heard anything more from Eric?” Cole asked.

Still running, Ryan took a drink from his water bottle, swallowed, then answered, “Nope. It’s beyond bizarre. He’s loved Brianne since the day he met her.”

“We all love Brianne,” Cole said between breaths. “Maybe that’s the problem.”

“What do you mean?”

“We love Brianne because we’ve known her so long. Maybe Eric realized he didn’t want to be tied down to the same woman he’d been with since college.”

In other words, romantic love didn’t last. Not like friendship did. “Maybe. I suppose we won’t know the truth until he shows back up or contacts one of us.”

Eric’s disappearance had them all on edge. Sure, their group of friends weren’t as close as they’d been in college, but there was a deep connection that held them together. Similar to the connection he had with Annie. He didn’t know what he’d do if Annie took off for parts unknown.

It seemed that by losing the weight, Annie had changed not only outside, but inside, too.

Irritated at where his mind kept going, he punched the speed of the treadmill higher and sprinted until sweat poured off of him. Yeah, that’s right, he’d sweat Annie out of his system.

But thirty minutes later, off the treadmill and holding a barbell over his friend as Cole adjusted position on the weight bench, Ryan still had Annie at the forefront of his mind. Damn.

“Can you lift the bar a little higher?” Cole asked.

“Will do,” Ryan said, focusing on the heavy barbell. But his mind wandered to Annie yet again, and the bar slipped—just a bit, but enough to send Cole back up to a seated position, glaring at him.

“Dude. You want to tell me what—or who—you’re so distracted about? I take it it’s a girl?”

Ryan let the heavy weight settle back into the cradle and ran a hand over his face. “Yeah, you could say that.”

“Samantha? I thought you dumped her, the way you dump them all.”

The comment smarted a bit. He didn’t dump all the women he went out with—some left him when they realized he wouldn’t make a major commitment. “I didn’t dump her. It was mutual. But you’re right. I’m not seeing her anymore.” Ryan wiped sweat from his forehead and sat on the weight bench next to Cole.

“So who are you…” Understanding lit Cole’s eyes. “Ah. Is this about Annie?”

Startled, Ryan turned his gaze to meet Cole’s steady one. “How’d you know?”

Cole shrugged. “That girl means more to you than all your other friends combined. And you’ve got your Mr. Protective vibe going on. Right along with your Get Your Mind Off Her Tits one.”

Ryan glowered at him.

“It’s true,” Cole said. “Funny how they always show up hand-in-hand. The first time I saw them together was in college, when she came to visit and you wouldn’t let any of us ask her out. You said none of us was good enough for her. But it’s been obvious for years that you don’t think you’re good enough for her. At least, not good enough to keep her, or to nail her and stay friends with her.”

“Watch your mouth,” Ryan warned.

Cole laughed. “See? There you go again. You want to protect her, and the more you want to protect her, the more you want to fuck her. But you refuse to let yourself think that way, so you torture yourself. It’s a cruel, endless cycle, dude.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Is that right? Then why don’t you tell me what’s got you so twisted up?”

Ryan couldn’t. He wouldn’t betray Annie’s confidence by telling anyone about her naughty list. But…

“She’s heading to Vegas today. Alone.”

“Why is she…” Again, that look of understanding flashed across his friend’s face. “Ah. A little tit-for-tat, maybe?”

“Huh?”

“You were in Vegas last week for the bachelor party. Maybe she’s imagining you doing all sorts of things, things she’s pissed as hell about, so she’s dishing out some payback?”

The idea stunned Ryan. It wasn’t possible. Annie didn’t play those kinds of games. Well, the old Annie wouldn’t, anyway. This new Annie hadn’t even told him she was going to Vegas.

Cole handed him a water bottle. Ryan stared at it.

“You know she lost a lot of weight recently,” he began slowly.

Nodding, Cole said, “She’s a bit on the skinny side now—I liked her with more meat on her bones. But I have to admit, she seemed different at the wedding. More confident. So she’s going to Vegas to see exactly what her new body can do for her?”

“Maybe,” Ryan grumbled. “I tried talking her out of it, but…”

For a long while, Cole simply sat, staring ahead at the hustle and bustle of the gym. Finally, he said, “When does she leave?”

“Three hours.”

“You know what they say…” Cole said.

Ryan lifted his head. “No. What do ‘they’ say?”

“If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.”

“Meaning?”

“Go with her. And while you’re there, figure out what you want. If you could have her, would you want her?”

His first thought was Hell, yes. Annie was beautiful. Smart. Fun and kind. The women he dated inevitably came up short when compared to her. But the problem was, he wanted Annie for a lifetime, and the best way to make sure that happened was to keep sex out of it. “I want to be her friend.”

“But what if you can be more?”

“She’s not interested in me in any other way than friendship,” Ryan said. “She wasn’t in high school and she’s not now. She said it herself. She wants to ‘test the waters,’ and a girl who wants that is someone ready to move on at a moment’s notice. As you pointed out, that’s standard operating procedure for me. Eventually, for one of us, it wouldn’t be enough and I could lose her forever.” It wasn’t worth the risk. “Let’s talk about something else. Any news on the real estate front?”

Cole had his own place in downtown LA, but he’d been putting off selling his mother’s home in one of the surrounding suburbs. His mom had passed away three months before from breast cancer. Though he didn’t talk about it, Cole had been close to his mother, who’d raised him on her own. Cole would be grieving her loss for a long time to come, but selling her house would be an important part of him moving forward.

“Not yet,” Cole said. “I took so much time off when she—you know, when she was really sick—and right after. I can’t keep leaving things to Luke to run on his own.” He stood and turned at the sound of girlish giggles. There were a couple of young women on the treadmills, and they waved at Cole and Ryan.

Ryan smirked. “Looks like you’ve got a fan club.”

“It’s you. They want some fire-boy lovin’,” Cole said.

“No, they clearly want some biker-boy action. Wait! I think I can read their lips.” He spoke softly but with a slightly girlie tone. “Look at that one, the one with all the tats. Oh…he’s soooo dreamy. Just imagine what it would feel like to touch all that hard muscle. To feel that goatee against your skin. To ride his…bike.”

Cole snorted. “Shut the fuck up and, since you can’t seem to spot me worth a damn, I’ll spot you. I don’t want to be in a high-rise when a fire breaks out and have to worry about whether your fat ass can make it to the top floor to save me.”

Ryan grinned and got back into his workout. It would be a cold day in hell before Cole needed rescuing from anyone. He’d be the first person Ryan would want taking his back. And it wasn’t all brawn and no heart with Cole, either. Every other weekend, he and his biker friends got on their bikes and did a run for one charity or another. Most of the time, it was for kids, but lately he’d been doing cancer runs. Two weeks ago, Cole and all of his tough biker friends had been wearing hot-pink ribbons for breast cancer awareness.

Cole glanced back at the girls again as he spotted for Ryan.

“Why don’t you just go over and say hello?” Ryan said.

“Nah. They’re cute, but I don’t have time to get involved right now.”

“The way they’re looking at you, they might be up for a drive-by.”

Cole chuckled. “No time for even that. You, on the other hand, have the whole weekend free.”

Ryan arched a brow. “You’re suggesting I go over there and chat them up?”

“Nope. I know you’re not interested. And something tells me you don’t have the time either.”

“Why’s that?”

Cole tossed Ryan a towel. “You’re going to have to hustle to make that flight to Vegas.”