Tess
If I never see Declan Gilroy again it’ll be too soon.
I mean it.
At least I want to mean it.
Because he’s arrogant.
And a liar.
And a thief.
And a manipulative asshole.
And he hurts people.
I hate him.
So, if you hate him, why do you get all warm and achy whenever you think about him?
Because I’m stupid.
Because I let him do things to me that up until yesterday, I never even let myself think about.
Because now I can’t think about anything else.
It’s Monday afternoon and Henley wasn’t at school. She caught a three-day suspension for knocking Jessica out in the library. I’m worried about her. About what her mom did to her when she found out. As much as I want to check on her, I can’t. Her mother hates me. I’m unlady-like and a bad influence. If I show up at her house, I’m liable to make things worse. I could ask Ryan how she is but after the last time we talked, I’d be lucky if he didn’t spit on me.
I hear the slap of sneakers, coming up fast behind me and I look over my shoulder just in time to watch Conner fall into step beside me.
“Hey.” He doesn’t look at me when he says it. Doesn’t give me the dimples. That crooked half grin that drives the girls crazy. This isn’t the Conner Gilroy who oozes charm and cockiness. This is someone else. When I don’t answer him, he clears his throat and tries again. “Have you talked to her?”
Her is Henley.
I know he’s careful about saying her name out loud because she wants to keep whatever is going on between them a secret but it still bothers me. “Who is her?”
“Come on, Tess,” he says, throwing a quick glance to the cluster of giggling idiots walking in front of us. They keep looking back at us. Flipping their hair. Licking their lips. It’s almost as sad as it is ridiculous. Jessica is in the center of them, holding court. Keeps trying to get his attention. When he finally sees her, a disgusted look ripples across his perfect face. Refocusing on me he shakes his head. “I haven’t talked to her in days and I—”
“Neither have I.” I lift my hand and flip Jessica the bird when she shoots a glare in my direction. “Her mom...” I don’t finish saying it because I don’t have to. Judging from the look on his face, he knows all about Henley’s mom.
He doesn’t say anything else and neither do I. He walks me home even though his house is in the opposite direction. Stopping in front of the open roll-up, Conner shifts from one foot to the other, hands gripped around the straps of his backpack. He looks anxious. Awkward. Maybe if I was a different kind of girl, I’d assume it’s because he’s trying to work up the courage to ask me out or maybe even kiss me, but that’s not it.
I’m struck with the same thought as before. That this isn’t Conner. Not the Conner everyone else knows. This is someone else.
This is Henley’s Conner.
The Conner who loves her.
“Do you want to hang out for a while?” I don’t know why I make the offer. I’m backed up in the garage as usual and I have homework. I don’t have time to hang out. I never really do, but he looks lost and somewhere along our ten-minute walk, I seem to have developed a soft spot for him.
He finally smiles at me. Gives me the full-tilt, knee-shaking, panty-melting Conner Gilroy grin. And it has absolutely no effect on me, whatsoever. “Are you trying to get me naked, Tessie?”
Tessie? I have no idea where the nickname comes from but I roll with it because for some weird reason, it sounds right, coming from him.
“Gross.” I make a gagging noise and roll my eyes. “Are you trying to make me throw-up?”
The look on his face shifts again and relief shows itself plainly. “Maybe.” He gives me another quick half-smile as he moves past me and through the open door to the garage.
He was testing me.
And I passed.