- Aiden -
I regretted honking as soon as I did it.
What the fuck was I doing? Being pissed was no excuse to act like a Neanderthal.
I got out of the car, walked to the door of Lucy’s apartment building, and pressed the buzzer.
“Hello?”
“Fiona, it’s Aiden. Is Lucy ready?”
“Yeah, she’s on her way down.”
I stood back from the door and folded my arms. I wasn’t expecting Fiona to buzz me in, but when I heard the latch click, I shoved the door open.
When I looked up the stairs, my jaw dropped. Lucy- or someone that looked suspiciously like her- was gliding down the stairs like a yellow balloon. I swallowed.
From where I was standing, it felt like I could look up her legs forever. And her face looked different, too. Lighter. Like she was wearing less make up than usual.
I knew I should say something. I wanted to. But by the time she got to the bottom of the stairs, I’d barely managed to pick my jaw up off the floor.
“Hi,” she said.
“Hi.”
“You look handsome.”
My eyes bounced between her glossy lips and her smooth, exposed collarbone. “You, too.”
She smiled. “Tha-”
“Not handsome though,” I said. “You look- shit.”
Her eyes went wide.
“I mean, wow.” For a second I completely forgot what the heck I was doing there.
She leaned down and grabbed the handle of the small duffel bag by the door.
“I’ll get it,” I said. “You just-”
“Just what?” she said, tilting her head.
“You just stand back and tell me what you’ve done with my friend Lucy.”
She rolled her eyes and stepped out the front door.
I looked after her, watching her shiny hair swing down her back and pursed my lips. Then I closed the door behind us, hurried to the passenger side, and opened it for her.
“Thanks,” she said, clutching her small purse in front of her as she took a seat.
I waited for her to tuck her bare legs into the car and closed the door. Then I opened the door behind her and set her stuff down on the floor before walking around to the driver’s seat.
Once I sat down, I stuck the key in the ignition and turned towards her. “I’m sorry I honked.”
“It’s okay,” she said. “Don’t worry about it.”
I looked in the rearview mirror and backed up so I could drive out of the space. My guts felt so twisted I didn’t know what to do. On one hand, Lucy looked stunning, and I could feel my body reacting to her little yellow dress, her shiny hair, and her glossy lips.
On the other hand, I was still hurt. I wished I wasn’t. I wanted to forget the whole thing, but the fact of the matter was that she’d lied to my face and let me look like a fool.
And the conflict between those two realities was making me sick.
“Aiden, I owe you an-”
“Don’t,” I said, keeping my eyes on the road. “Just don’t.”
“But my whole day will be ruined if you don’t let me-”
I slammed on the brakes at the light. “Your day will be ruined?! Your day will be ruined?! Well that’s a goddamn shame.”
“Aiden-”
“At least your reputation won’t be ruined. At least no one will laugh at you behind your back while-”
“That’s not fair.”
“No,” I said. “What’s not fair is that I’m the one that looks like a monster for being pissed when you’re the one that fucked me over.”
“I didn’t fuck you over!”
“You stood by while someone else did,” I said. “Which is basically the same thing.”
“Look. I’m sorry, okay?”
“Sorry you got caught or sorry you aren’t the friend I thought you were?”
“Both,” she said, looking out her window.
I exhaled through my nose.
She stared out the windshield and then turned to face me. “I never meant to hurt you. You know me well enough to know that.”
“I thought I did.”
“I didn’t know how to tell you-”
“What do you mean you didn’t know how to tell me? You didn’t even try.”
“I know but-”
“You must’ve had half a dozen opportunities to mention it.”
“And what if you didn’t believe me?”
“It wouldn’t have mattered! You would have done your job as my friend.”
She sighed.
“Whether I refused to listen or not is irrelevant.”
“I know.”
“I don’t expect you to make decisions for me or tell me what to do. I only ask that you don’t hide information from me.”
“You’re right.”
“I don’t want to be right. I want my friend back.”
She tucked her hair behind her ear.
I noticed her purple streak was missing. “How long did you know?”
“Know what?”
“That she was seeing other people. To put it politely.”
“Not that long.”
“Days? Weeks? Months?”
“No.”
“How long?”
“Maybe a few weeks.”
“Fuck me, Lucy.” I shook my head. “And it didn’t occur to you to say something?”
“Of course it did! But you knew I didn’t like her, and I didn’t want you to think I was just trying to break up your relationship out of spite.”
“Why would I think that?”
“I don’t know.”
“Until this shit happened, I always thought you had my best interests at heart.”
“I was confused.”
“I don’t know why. Seems like a straightforward problem with an obvious solution to me.”
“Well, it wasn’t.”
I clenched my jaw.
“At first I wasn’t sure so I didn’t want to stir shit up for no reason.”
“And when you were sure? When you and Alex saw her on fucking Tinder?”
“I didn’t know what to do.”
I shook my head. “Not good enough.”
“It wasn’t easy to not tell you,” she said. “I lost sleep over it, trying to figure out what to say.”
“You lost sleep, huh? Too bad it wasn’t cause you were actually picking up the phone to call.”
“I know.”
“Does Alex think I’m some kind of tool now?”
“Of course not. I didn’t even tell him. I just swiped her away. I didn’t say she was your girlfriend or anything.”
I felt my chest loosen a little bit. Knowing one less person knew Chelsea dicked me around was a relief, albeit slight.
“Only Fiona knew, I swear. And that’s just cause she was with me when we saw her out with a guy.”
“What guy?”
Lucy shrugged. “A guy I recognized from Tinder.”
I felt my neck start to get hot. “A guy you recognized?”
“Yeah,” she said, looking out her window.
I slammed my hand on the steering wheel. “You’re not even being honest with me now!”
“What do you want me to say?”
“How is that not obvious?! I want the truth! That’s what this whole argument is about! You lying to my face-”
“Fine,” she said, her voice shaking. “You want the truth? I recognized the guy because I went on a date with him and had meaningless, empty, unremarkable sex with him afterwards, and I thought I’d never see him again until I saw him out with Chelsea across the street from where he fucked me a week earlier! Okay? Are you happy now?! Is that what you wanted to hear?!”
“No,” I said, tightening my grip on the steering wheel.
Lucy wiped under her eyes with her fingertips, trying to keep her tears from ruining her makeup.
I loosened my tie with one hand and kept my eyes on the road. Five minutes earlier, the fact that Lucy knew Chelsea fucked around on me was the most disturbing issue in my life. But the thought of Lucy fucking another guy on top of that was like a living nightmare.
I didn’t know what to think. I knew she’d been with other guys. We’d laughed about her shady dates and fallen princes a thousand times.
But that was before.
Before she was mine.