Chapter 26
That’s a loaded question.
Stark white letters on the screen spelled out the name I’d been thinking of. Mixed emotions that ran through my head caused me to hesitate. Vibrations illuminating that little green button taunted me—push it and answer it, you dumbass.
Without further thought, my thumb did my brain’s work. “Hi, Margo.”
“Hi.” Her curt tone had me on full alert. I think my thumb made a mistake. “Thank you for the dress, but I can’t accept it.” No how are you or I miss you. Only the words I had asked her not to say.
The skin around my eyes tightened with every circle my fingers made on my forehead. “Margo, it’s yours.”
“It’s too much; I don’t feel right about it.”
“Don’t do this.”
“Do what? Return a gift that cost a half million dollars?”
This woman . . . not only did she not want what my heart was able to give her, but it was also clear she didn’t want anything from me. You know what I said to that? Too fucking bad, that’s what. “No, returning a gift that I bought for you. Let me give you this one thing. I know you love the dress, you even said so yourself. Plus, you don’t need to worry about affording it since it’s paid for. I could buy a dozen more. It’s no big deal.”
I looked at my phone and the call timer was ticking away, so I knew she was still on the line, yet all I heard was silence.
Finally, she spoke, “Did the painting arrive?”
I briskly replied, “It did.”
“Are you okay?”
“That’s a loaded question. Are you sure you want the answer?”
“I meant about the painting.”
“I don’t give a fuck about that painting. Do you know how hard these past seventeen days have been for me?”
She let out a breath with a small squeak at the end, but didn’t say anything. Well, I didn’t either. If she wasn’t sure what to say, I’d sit here and wait until she did. Seconds turned into minutes—it felt like an eternity. Finally, after another breath followed by a stifled sniff hit my eardrum. “It was hard for me, too, but it doesn’t change anything. We want different things.”
“No, we don’t. You just want a piece of paper, validating our commitment. We don’t need that. I am committed to you.”
“Like I said, different things.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Yes.”
Bracing myself for the worst, I asked, “Do you miss me?”
“Every day.” Her voice softened and all I hoped was I could get through to her.
“I miss you, too. My days have been hell.”
Another sniffle. “It will get easier.”
Yeah, I wasn’t going to get through to her. Margo’s mind was made up, and she thought I was the stubborn one. “I’ll take your word for it.” With a huff, I stood from the couch and poured myself two fingers of scotch. My esophagus burned when the liquid slid down my throat. With a thud, I placed the empty glass on the table. “Keep the dress, donate it, do whatever you want, since it’s yours. Take care of yourself, Margo.”
Funny thing, pressing the red button to end the call was just as difficult as it was to push the green one.
Birds chirped, flowers bloomed, and everyone was happier. It was unbelievable what that golden orb peeking out from the purplish pink horizon did for people’s dispositions. Even I was starting to feel more like myself. My feet pounded on the path through the park, stepping on leafy shadows. The more I thought about the past couple of weeks, the harder I ran. Today marked the twenty-ninth day that I hadn’t seen Margo.
What also sucked was I hadn’t seen Adam very much either. Maybe Margo was right, and because we didn’t work, it would screw up my friendship with her brother. But tomorrow, that was going to change, unless I could get out of going to the event Jan was gung-ho about.
A blond ponytail swung on the head in front of me. Her toned, lithe body was highlighted by a pair of hot pink running shorts. Dammit, I should want her, but I didn’t. The old me would have run up to her until we were side by side to strike up a conversation. But the new me was in a fucking slump. Rather than doing what I would have done pre-Margo, I turned around and headed in the opposite direction.
Two by two, I jogged up the steps. Jan greeted me at my door. “After you shower,” she crinkled her nose, “we can go over your calendar and agenda for tomorrow night.”
When I stared at her blankly, she shook her head. “Nice try, but you know what tomorrow is. Now go get cleaned up. Your morning has been cleared.”
Jan knew exactly what I needed. “Thank you, Jan. But I’m not attending.” Before the scowl turned to scolding, I walked into my office.
Suds ran down my body, followed by warm water. I was finally at the point where cold showers weren’t necessary. It wasn’t because I was having sex with anyone other than myself, but because I was starting to feel back to normal. When I read The Post last week, my “eligible” status had been restored. I wasn’t fond of seeing the words written in black and white, but it was what it was. Like me, Margo had convictions. Who was I to fault her for that?
Back behind my desk, I fired up my laptop and let Jan know I was ready.
Wisps of gray hair fluttered as she sat in front of me sans iPad and clicked the top of her pen. “Tomorrow night is the Freeman Benefit. I did RSVP for two, but that won’t be a problem if Ms. Perry can’t go with you or you don’t have a date.” As if my eyelids were spring-loaded, I looked at her. Her small hand waved back and forth. “You know what I mean. Would you like me to find a nice girl for you? Anna in accounting has a niece who is single. She’s a very sweet girl.”
Maybe she didn’t hear me. “I’m sure she is, but I’m not going.” Originally, I had planned on going with Adam and Cade, but I’ve since informed them I wouldn’t be attending.
“Noah Winston, you will be going to this event. Montgomery Freeman was a close friend and colleague of your grandfather’s.” The stray wisps of gray that poked out from the side of her head were smoothed with the brush of her palm. “Now, about Anna’s niece . . .”
Why this woman could get me to do things was beyond me. “I’m good going solo. That is, unless you’d like to be my plus one.”
Lines deepened around her eyes. “Actually, I have plans, but I appreciate the offer.”
“Hot date?” I waggled my eyebrows.
“A lady never tells.”
A hearty chuckle escaped me. “Well, have fun, but not too much fun . . .” I tossed her a wink. “Take the rest of the day off. I’m going to do the same once I cancel my afternoon.”
Jan stood. “I’ll take care of it.”
“Jan . . .” I leaned forward, forearms rested on my desk, fingers laced together. “I’m quite capable of handling my calendar for one afternoon. Now, I’d like you to go to Cara’s and get the works—hair, nails, massage . . . wax.” She sucked in air so quick it made me laugh. “Please, it’s on me. Have them put it on my account.”
Once she realized arguing with me would be futile, she was on her way to Cara’s Day Spa on the lower floor of this building. They had been renting the space for a few years now, and Jan had never indulged herself.
Most of my clients weren’t disappointed I canceled. I was sure they were headed for a round of eighteen. Anytime the weather warmed up, many Friday afternoon meetings were conducted on the course rather than a boardroom.
Blue skies captured my attention. The city was so peaceful from where I stood. Although, I knew as soon as I walked out of my building, the beat of the city would be palpable. Life was happening whether I was ready for it or not. It was time for me to get my head out of my ass and live it.
Arthur greeted me. “Home, sir?”
“Yes, thank you.”
When I walked into my place, Jan called.
“Hello, Jan. How was your appointment?”
“Glorious. Thank you very much for everything. I forgot to tell you, they are taking donations—either monetary or items they can sell. All proceeds benefit the Freeman Scholarship.”
“Thank you. I’ll be sure to donate something. Now, stop worrying about me and enjoy the rest of your day.”
“Noah, one more thing.”
I sat on my couch and looked at the painting wrapped in brown paper. “Yes?”
“Please don’t let what happened with your parents cast a dark cloud over your own happiness.”
“Thank you.”
“I know you’re rolling your eyes or running your fingers through your hair . . .” With a smack, my hand dropped to my lap. “Just take it from an old woman who cares about you. Be happy and have fun tomorrow night.”
“Thank you. And, Jan?”
“Yes?”
“Have fun on your date, and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
She laughed. “If I follow that philosophy, the possibilities are endless.”
The spa must have rejuvenated her feistiness. I couldn’t be more pleased with how relaxed she sounded. “See you on Monday.”
Before going home, I called the company hosting the Freeman Benefit and donated the painting of my mother. Maybe once she was cleared out of my life, my head would follow suit.