2

Mia

Sitting in Steel’s massive SUV, I held the wriggling puppy as excitement built up in me. This sexy man never ceased to amaze me with his thoughtfulness. He was devastated when Bullet was shot by the madman who was targeting Steel and his brothers by going after the women of the club, but he was more concerned for Shiloh. The precious little girl loved his dogs, which she and the rest of the club thought of as belonging to her. She was so sad when he’d told her about the German shepherd’s passing. Of course, the guys didn’t tell her that he had been shot by Rogue, just that he had an accident and died very suddenly.

Shiloh hadn’t understood much of it and had many questions, but once she finally understood that Bullet was gone, she insisted the dog had a proper burial and that everyone attended. So the day Stella was released from the hospital, we had a funeral for Bullet. Stella was in Booth’s arms for the entire service, and the president never let his girl go.

I remembered how I felt when I saw his obvious love and devotion to my friend. Pure and simple jealousy. I had no right to feel that way, and I didn’t begrudge Stella or any of my other friends that kind of love, but I wanted it, too. I wanted a man to look at me like his day began and ended with seeing my face. I wanted a man to love me like he needed me to exist. I wanted a man to be obsessed with me—in a good way and not a creepy stalker way. Was that too much to ask? Apparently, it was.

“What ya thinking over there, Beauty?”

Speaking of obsessions, mine was sitting about two feet from me with his large, capable hands gripping the steering wheel, his movie-star slash model looks, his thick muscular thighs perfect in the tight denim, and the bulge behind his zipper hiding the promise of an amazing cock. Not that I had seen one, mind you, but I would guess Steel’s was amazing. It was in my dreams, which was all I had.

I had tried to get laid a few times recently. Two of the prospects from the club seemed interested, but they’d backed off for some reason. Then there was Wes, the new bartender at the Bar and Grill. I liked him a lot, and he seemed to be into me, too. We even kissed once in the car park after a shift one night. I didn’t have many kisses to compare it to, but I had liked it, enjoyed it even. I didn’t feel the world shift or my insides explode, but it was nice. I must not be very good at it, though, because the next shift we were supposed to work together, he swapped out, and Rainn was there instead. And I’d heard nothing from him since. It was weird because before and straight after the kiss, he seemed fine, like really into me, and then… not. I definitely needed some kissing practice.

Suddenly, remembering Steel asked me a question, I turned to him, the pup now asleep in my arms.

“Well, I think that I need some kissing practice. I kissed Wes, and I thought I did okay, but obviously, I didn’t because he just left the building so to speak and quite literally.”

I mean, what kind of guy would pursue me like Wes had, then poof, gone without a trace. I brushed my teeth twice a day, for heaven’s sake.

“Um, Mia,” Steel said.

But I had gone too far inside my head. Sure, I hadn’t had too much experience, but shit, it wasn’t rocket science. You open your mouth, move your lips, add tongue, and groan.

Simple. I had to get someone to kiss me. Deck couldn’t because Charlotte wouldn’t let him, Booth was also out—Stella would tear my ears off—and Mannix, eh, he was okay. I mean he was hot, no doubt, but he was too much of a player, and I would be wondering what or who his tongue had been in. Nope, not Mannix. Darth? He wasn’t taken in the true sense of the word, but my mind went back to the disastrous dress fitting where Vegas told us she loved him, but he would never claim her. She had been so sad that I felt sorry for her. So no, Darth was out.

It had to be Creed. Creed was the only other single guy at the club, and he had shown interest in me—the night he took my drunken arse home sprang to mind, though it had been one of the most embarrassing nights of my life, in more ways than one. It started with a drunken phone call to Steel and ended with me throwing myself at Creed, dressed only in my bra and panties. Not my finest hour, but Creed was wonderful, taking me home and staying with me all night. I felt my face flush at the memory of the poor man fighting off my drunken advances.

“Please, Creed,” I begged. The copious amount of alcohol I had consumed was far from diminishing. If it had, I wouldn’t have been standing in my living room begging my friend to have sex with me.

“Mia, gorgeous, I think you should go to bed. I will bunk out here on the couch just in case you need me during the night. But please, Mia, just go to bed, and for the love of all that is holy, please put some clothes on.” The strain in Creed’s voice was evident, but my cocktail-soaked brain took it as rejection. More rejection.

“What is it with you men? Am I too sweet? Too vanilla for you? Steel sees Callie as a fucking pin-up, and I am what? Just seen as the little sister, the fucking club mascot?” I yelled, not caring about the tears that were wetting my checks. I didn’t care because I was furious. Mad at myself, and mad at my sister for having what she didn’t deserve. Mad at Steel because he could be so sweet and gentle with me.

Sometimes, at work, I could feel his eyes following me, and when I would look at him at the right moment, the moment when our eyes would meet and lock, I felt his attraction to me. I knew he felt something, but then he would break my heart whenever Callie was around. What the hell was it about her that had normal intelligent men acting like lovesick fools? And now Creed was standing there being offered a night of no-strings sex, and he was turning me down. Aargh, I was too drunk, too hurt, and too everything to deal with this anymore.

“Never mind, Creed. Thanks for bringing me home. Help yourself to anything. I’ll see you in the morning.” I turned to leave but stopped when I heard Creed’s deep voice let out a curse.

“The last thing I see you as is a little sister, Mia Stone. I have thought more than once about being balls deep inside you, baby.”

His words should have turned me on, but his tone was not one of lust and passion but of regret.

“But you’re not going to do that, are you, Creed.” It wasn’t a question because I already knew the answer. Creed was in love with his wife. His dead wife. I watched as he dropped his head, his large hands reaching up to run his fingers through his short hair. He looked down for a long moment before returning his eyes to me, eyes filled with regret and guilt.

“No,” he croaked. Then he turned and left the room, leaving me with sadness that overwhelmed me. Slowly, in my drunken state, I walked to my room on unreliable and quivery legs. I knew Creed wouldn’t be far away from me all night. His protective instincts were what made him the man he was today. A man tormented by one fateful accident that he had not been able to do anything about but was still punishing himself for years later.

So it was not a surprise when I woke several hours later to an empty couch with the blanket and pillow placed neatly at the end, but what did surprise me was the single rose placed on top of the pillow.

“It has to be Creed,” I said aloud as I came back to the moment. “There is no other option. Well, there is, but I feel weird about paying a male escort to kiss me. And how much would that cost? But I can keep it in mind if Creed turns me down again.”

Suddenly, the truck came to an abrupt stop, and the pup in my arms nearly fell off my lap from the jerking of my body. When I looked over at Steel, I could see over his shoulder that we were at the compound.

“What in the fuck are you talking about, Mia? What has to be Creed? What do you mean if he turns you down again? And why are you talking about male escorts?”

I didn’t bother to answer him as I released my seat belt. The familiar Harley that had been missing for the last week or two was sitting in its usual place.

“Stella and Booth are back,” I squealed, which woke the puppy. The fat bulldog started wriggling again as I came close to tossing her over the console into Steel’s arms.

 “Mia, I want some answers.” The big, good-looking VP narrowed his eyes and frowned at me, growling as he struggled with the pup and his seat belt, which gave me the time I needed to escape his questioning. He would just try to talk me out of it. I didn’t know how many times he had told me to wait, that it would happen.

Well, screw that! I wanted it to happen now. I wanted to understand why Stella looked all gooey after Booth released her from a lip lock that caused all sorts of groans and moans from them. I wanted to see why Charlotte blushed after she walked out of her room, a cocky and satisfied looking Deck walking behind her. I wanted to do the things that I heard Callie bragging about when she and Tori sat at the bar in the compound and compared their conquests. Doing them with Steel was completely and totally out of the question. I wouldn’t even ask him. Well, not again, since it seemed that when I was drunk, I’d asked him all sorts of things.

But luckily, for him and me, we had managed to ignore those times. Plus, I had given up drinking because it gave me verbal diarrhoea.

As I ran across the car park, I glanced at the spot where my car blew up a few weeks ago, but I didn’t want to think about how close Rainn, Stella, and I had come to being blown to kingdom come.

Steel’s shouted commands for me to stop didn’t deter me from getting inside. I was on a mission.