Chapter Eight
One week later
“And anything you don’t plant is considered a weed,” Luca said.
“Even plants with pretty flowers on them?”
“Pretty much. I don’t mind them. Right now it looks all dead and barren. but come spring and summer they will grow.” He pulled out a few of the weeds as Mavis threw them into the compost bucket next to him.
Rather than stay inside for another weekend, she’d offered to come and help him in the garden.
She’d been with him for nearly a month now, and he was worrying about her. The reclusive lifestyle was good for him, but she was young. Did she miss being with everyone else? Her own peers? She never talked about boarding school or her life with her parents.
He knew she didn’t miss it, but he had to wonder.
This was a change in the early days even for him. He’d spend weeks at a time alone, building, creating, doing something, and then he’d need to interact. So, he’d drive out to a bar and then he’d get all the reminders he needed. People would stare at him, or women would give him that disgusted look.
Glancing over at her as she worked her way through the weeds, he wondered what was going through her mind.
She liked to have long moments of silence, and it didn’t feel awkward at all. The knees of her jeans were filthy, and she sat back, brushing at her brow.
“Am I doing this right?” she asked, pointing to the flowerbed.
“Yes.”
She’d pulled out all of the weeds, and he didn’t see a problem with what she’d done. The bed would be ready come spring when he could plant them out.
“Do you miss boarding school?”
“No.”
“Just like that?”
“I was there because I didn’t have anywhere else to go. It’s a bunch of girls who are forced to live with each other. Most of us are rich kids whose parents just wanted to get rid of us.” She did that shrug thing she liked doing so much. “Not much to miss. A couple of the girls would sneak out to meet up with guys. Then we’d all sit and listen as they told us about sex.” She got to her feet and walked toward him. She put her hands around his neck, and pressed her lips against his. “They had nothing on you.”
He gripped her ass. “That’s because I’m a man and they were messing with boys.”
“That’s true.” She pressed her body against him. “You’re all man.”
She kissed him again.
He was a fucking sucker. “I’ve got to work and you’re making it impossible to think.”
“Good. You need to stop thinking and focus on me.” She giggled.
“I worry about you.”
“Why? I’m being good. No spankings in over a week.”
He rolled his eyes. “I mean the outside world.”
“What about it?”
“You need to be around people your own age or even just people. Susan and the cleaners I have come here don’t count.”
“Why not? While you’re working I help them out.”
“You help them clean?” he asked.
“Yeah. I don’t mind it. It’s kind of fun. Also, Susan is teaching
me to cook. It’s a skill I’ve never been taught, and I’ve got a long way to go. I don’t mind where you live. I love it. The gardens, the fields, just everything about it. I love that it is only the two of us. I don’t need for us to be around lots of people.”
He stared at her and wondered.
“You really amaze me,” he said.
“Why? Because I’m totally awesome.” She winked at him.
She turned away, and he gave her ass a little swat. She gave him a yelp followed by a giggle.
“You do know we’re going to have to go out sometime? That we can’t stay here forever?”
She wrinkled her nose. “We’ll deal with that when we come to it.”
He watched as she got back to work.
Her ass was a curvy distraction as she got to weeding the other bed. It was way too cold, but he’d made her put on one of his sweaters. He’d noticed she always loved his little acts of protection, no matter how big or small.
Get your head out of your ass.
Tell her.
Luca didn’t want her to be on edge. He’d gotten an email from the social worker. She wanted to come and see Mavis to double check that everything was going fine. She intended to make a visit sometime next week.
Now, Susan and his cleaners hadn’t said anything when they caught him kissing Mavis or holding her. He refused to hide his feelings for her, but with the social worker, it was a different matter.
She could make things very fucking difficult for the two of them.
Mavis was of age, but he was her guardian. He knew from his research that this could blow up in his face. He was the adult, and if in some way they believed Mavis was in any way being taken advantage of, he could lose her.
Running a hand down his face, he tried not to think about the interference that could happen. He and Mavis were in a good place.
He didn’t want some fucking stranger interrupting their peace together. There was always someone trying to interfere, to ruin another’s life. He’d learned that firsthand.
“I’m going to see how Susan is and get a drink for both of us,” he said.
“Okay.”
Leaving her alone to garden, he made his way into the kitchen. Pots and pans bubbled on the stove.
“Hello, sir,” Susan said, with a smile.
He nodded at her and released a breath as he stood at the kitchen sink. What the hell should he do?
“She looks happier since coming here,” Susan said.
“She hasn’t had a good life.” It wasn’t a hard one, but he couldn’t imagine living with people who couldn’t stand you. His parents when they’d been around were very loving and supportive of his path. She tried to hide her feelings from him. Every now and then, he’d catch her watching him, and he saw the longing in her eyes.
He wasn’t used to the feelings she inspired.
It wasn’t just the sex, which was so fucking good.
He loved being inside her tight heat.
She made him feel, and that alone scared the crap out of him. Women often looked at him with greed, his wealth drawing them to him.
Mavis was rich.
Ryan hadn’t done badly for himself since their friendship died. All of that wealth would go to Mavis, including all of the shares and stocks, along with a position on her father’s company’s board. The men there were fucking vultures. They’d find some way to get rid of her or to make her life miserable. If she didn’t have anyone to guide her or make sure she was okay, they’d ruin her. Destroy her. He couldn’t have that.
Blowing out a breath, he stared at her. She jumped back and was batting at her body.
“You know, there’s no shame in loving her,” Susan said.
“Don’t.” It wasn’t love. He didn’t do love. “Her social worker is coming next week. Can you be here?”
“Does she know?”
“No. She doesn’t need to know either.” He turned his back on her and got started on making some sandwiches for her.
Slathering each slice of bread with some butter, he filled them with fresh cut deli meats that Susan always brought with her. Topping the sandwiches with another slice of bread, he poured them both a coffee and headed back outside.
He didn’t need an argument with Susan or to hear any of the bullshit she was talking about. He’d deal with the blonde chick soon enough, and as for Mavis, he’d make sure she was taken care of.
When she was twenty-one, she’d have her own fortune, and there wouldn’t be anything he could do about what she wished to do with her life.
Heading outside, he saw Mavis was in the process of running her fingers along the damp soil.
“Are you hungry?”
“Starving.”
She got up, brushed off her knees, and made her way toward him. He watched as she bent down near the tap he had outside for washing his hands and for the hose to water the garden.
He sat at the circular metal table that only had space for two. A couple of these were placed around the yard for decoration.
As Mavis took a seat opposite him, she pushed back a lock of hair that escaped her ponytail. She looked so young, so fucking young.
And she belongs to you.
You could keep her.
He tried to shut the thought down, but seeing her, thinking about her swollen with his child, wearing his ring, he felt … fucking desperate.
Forcing himself to take a bite of his sandwich, he didn’t like how hopeful he felt of taking her for his own. She was his former best friend’s daughter, and he shouldn’t be having these thoughts about her.
If he took her as his wife, the world would think he’d blackmailed her or wanted her for her money.
Why would a beautiful young woman want anything to do with him? He was scarred, ruined, and she had so much left of her life.
“Are you okay?” she asked. “I think you’re going to make the grass scared and die you’re glaring at it that much.”
He forced himself to remain calm and shook his head. “Nothing. Eat your sandwich.”
“Yes, boss.” She winked at him, and he knew without a doubt he was in trouble.
She’d gotten under his skin, and there was no way out, not for him.
All he wanted to do was protect her, and the only way to do that was to let her go.
Wasn’t it?
****
For the past week, Luca had been in a horrible mood. Mavis stared across the dining room table and stared at the door that he’d just stormed out of. Last night was the first time he’d sent her back to her room.
The rejection stung.
She’d been sneaking into his bed, which wasn’t sneaking at all—it was pretty blatant as she’d always been snuggled up under the covers by the time he arrived.
Her breakfast of poached eggs, bacon, and fried tomatoes was half-eaten. Picking up the plate, she took it into the kitchen.
Susan was back, and Mavis had noticed she’d been here every single day the past week.
“You’re not hungry?” she asked.
“No.”
“Ah, okay.”
Susan didn’t look at her, and Mavis leaned against the counter.
“Do you know what is wrong with him?”
“Sorry, dear, what?”
She stared at Susan, and for the first time since she moved here, she felt like a child. Gritting her teeth, she wondered if that was Luca’s problem.
He finally saw her as a child.
Not that she was one. Far from it.
“Nothing.” She headed to the back door.
“Where are you going?” Susan asked.
“For a walk.” She really needed to clear her head.
Closing the door gently behind her, she walked down the steps and took a few moments to breathe in the crisp air. The days and nights were getting colder. She loved this time of year when the foliage was pushed back, bare, and nothing could touch it. The trees had shed their leaves, and what was once ripe, full, and beautiful now held a tinge of darkness. Of something morbid and sad.
Pushing those thoughts from her mind, she made her way through the garden, taking time to stop here and there to just get her rapidly beating heart under control.
Sitting alone for breakfast wasn’t new for her.
Had Luca bored with her already?
“Men only want one thing, and when they get it, they don’t care about anyone or anything. You’re just a thing to them, Mavis. A useless piece of worthless trash, and you’re not even pretty, so they won’t even come back for a second helping.”
Even with her mother dead, she heard the cackle that followed something like that. It seemed that no matter how hard she tried to forget her mother’s vile words, she couldn’t. In moments like this, where she didn’t have a clue what she’d done or who she’d hurt, they came back to haunt her, to scare her, and there was no fighting it.
How could she fight it?
This was her life now.
Tears filled her eyes, and she tried not to let them fall.
“For fuck’s sake, Mavis, I don’t have time for this.”
She’d only asked him if he wanted to come out for a swim with her. He’d told her just the other day as they were working in the yard that the pool was heated and any time she wished to go for a swim she was more than welcome.
He didn’t work all that much, and when he did it was often on his laptop while she rested her head against his knee. He’d always balance the laptop on the arm of the sofa while his other hand ran fingers through her hair.
She hadn’t made him do that.
He’d done that all on his own, and now she felt like a bitch for having him do that. She never stopped him from working.
She kept on walking, needing a distraction from the tears that for some reason wouldn’t stop.
The last thing she wanted to do was cry. Crying never solved anything. Crying just made people laugh.
She found herself back near the pool house and pool.
Alone.
Just like that night when it was raining.
The night she lost her virginity and her heart.
Luca didn’t want her anymore.
The first tears started to fall, and she hated them.
Luca had shown her how to pull back the pool cover. He always had people coming out to service one thing or another. Since he had an idea for the rest of the ranch and the spare fields, he’d been talking to several ranch hands and business owners. She’d been there in the background, listening as he talked business.
He knew what he was doing. He wasn’t a fool, even though some of the men had tried to treat him as such. She’d hated it when men had assumed she was his daughter.
If she wore lower shirts that showed off a great deal of her cleavage, they never doubted that she was old enough to be by his side. Never had she hated her age more than those moments when they talked family and daughters.
It never failed to hurt her when he’d describe her as his ward, or himself as her guardian.
Or his best friend’s kid.
Yeah, that one bit.
She pressed the button that would pull back the cover that kept the water free from the falling leaves, not that there were any left.
She stared over the edge, and wondered what the water was like.
It had to be cold.
Instead of turning on the other button to begin warming the pool, she stepped to the edge and removed her clothing. Wriggling out of the jeans, she let them drop to the edge, then her panties, shirt, and bra.
The cold nipped at her flesh.
Her nipples tightened to an unbearable degree as the cold made them so hard.
She took a deep breath, inhaling the chill even as more tears fell down her cheeks. She hated feeling this way and had long ago promised herself she wouldn’t do this to herself.
Gripping the rail, she stepped down. Each step took her closer to the water. The moment her feet touched the water, she gasped. It was so freaking cold.
She couldn’t help but laugh a little. Slowly, she lowered herself into the water until her feet touched the bottom.
Stepping away from the side of the pool, she walked to the center. The cold was scary good. She loved how it surrounded her. Running her hands back and forth through the water, she closed her eyes.
Tears fell down her face, and the pain was still there, but it was numbed.
She felt so cold and so open, and so scared, but none of it mattered. Just like when she begged her parents to let her stay home, and they refused to speak to her again. Or the first day they dropped her off at boarding school with a suitcase full of clothes.
She’d begged and screamed not to go, but her dad had forced her out of the car and dumped her at the reception desk of the boarding school.
No one had cared that she was terrified and just wanted to stay at home. Everyone had seen a spoiled brat. A young girl who didn’t want to do as her parents said. It had been so far from the truth.
They had lured her into the car with the promise of ice cream and some shopping. They lied to her to get her out of the house.
That one drive had been both hope and the worst memory in the world. She’d believed while they’d been in the car that they wanted to do better, to try better. That she was good enough for them.
Only, it had ended with her making a fool of herself.
Not seeing them had soon turned into a comfort.
She had never realized that she didn’t need her parents at all. They weren’t important to her.
Luca would have to be the same. She’d have to find some way of dealing with whatever problem he was having because she couldn’t allow herself to break. Not again.
She was eighteen now. There was no way he could send her to boarding school. She’d be able to find her own path, one that didn’t include him.
Even as she thought about life without him, it filled her with a giant ball of sadness. He’d become part of her life and now she was thinking about leaving him behind. It was right.
Something had to be wrong, right?
You’re just a kid.
A kid that no one ever wanted.
And now you’re a pain, and it’s time for you to be on your own.