I never pictured what jail would be like before, and sadly, what I was experiencing was far worse than I could have imagined. From the stench of the air that permeated around me, to the stickiness of the floor. The ripping sound my shoes made each time I walked anywhere in the facility. Who knew what had been on the concrete before the sole of my foot. The pillow they gave me was so flat, I was probably better off sleeping on paper. At least then I would have known if it was clean or not.
I could kill Albert, and I wanted to more now than the moment I saw him in bed with my cousin. How could he do this to me, over a stupid ring? Maybe in hindsight I should have just given it back, but I was hurt. He hurt me in a way no woman or man for that matter, should feel. Then to top it off he actually stole money from me. This whole mess was ridiculous and there was nothing, nothing at all, that I could do to change any of it.
Hopefully Jessie’s dad could help me. When we were kids he was always very kind to me, but I wasn’t feeling like I had much hope right this moment.
The clock across the hall showed it was eleven forty five at night. I was completely exhausted, but I couldn’t sleep. Officer Oliver made sure that this experience would be the absolute worst of my life. He even made sure I was cavity searched. Absolutely humiliating. What did they think I had up my rear, the bloody ring?
My heart rate was racing and my adrenaline was soaring. The idea of sleeping scared me, and the thought of no sleep made me worry about my sanity in the morning. I was already very snippy to them, and they threatened discipline towards me. They didn’t elaborate what that meant, but I was too scared to confront it.
Whenever I got out of the hell I was presently living the first thing I was going to do is take a hot shower and scour every inch of my body in soap. Then I was going to find Albert and wring his neck.
After countless sleepless hours passed by I was finally allowed out of my cell for breakfast. Which, in and of itself, was a loose term. The oatmeal they provided looked more like dried oats in a cup of milk, and tasted even worse. It felt like time was going by as slow as possible. The sensation of spiders crawling all over my skin wouldn’t stop. It was a combination of stress and the feeling of being dirty that kept dragging my mind and emotions into the dark hole. I didn’t know how to save myself from the feelings I just prayed over and over that Mr. Anderson would come through for me.
“Ms. Smith your lawyer is here.”
I looked up at the clock, twelve thirty. It had almost sounded like God himself was speaking to me offering salvation. I stood up as quickly as I could and waited patiently for the guard to open my cell.
“Turn around and cross your hands please.” She said.
“You don’t have to cuff me I am not a criminal.”
“That’s what they all say, now if you want to see the lawyer do it.”
There was little point to arguing it never got me anywhere, so I complied with her request. As we walked down the jail hallway I felt the women staring at me; it was almost like those nightmares you have as a child, walking to school naked. Like they could see right through you. I was escorted to a room and the moment they opened the door I saw not just my lawyer but Jessie too. The tears started, and I had never been so glad to see anyone in my life.
“Take those cuffs off my client please.”
“Whatever you say, you have five minutes.”
The moment the cuffs were removed and the door was closed I ran into Jessie’s open embrace and let his shoulder act like my pillow. I know I didn’t cry for very long, but it felt like forever. Happy tears angry tears, tears of all kinds.
“Merewyn are you okay?” His dad was the first one to speak.
“I don’t even know, I have been violated, humiliated and I feel disgusting. Am I going to be able to get out of here?”
“Yes,” Jessie said without even a moment’s hesitation. But I cared about what the other tall dark and handsome man thought was going to happen to me.
“That is the plan, but first we have to go before the judge. I got a new outfit from your mothers and a brush. For when you’re released.”
“I want to kill Albert for this. They even did a cavity search! I mean wasn’t the strip search bad enough?”
“Dad you are going to tell her the good news right?”
His dad nodded and I finally felt a shred of hope, “Tell me …”
“I talked with a prosecutor friend of mine this morning. As soon as we are out of here we are going to file charges against Albert and he will actually go to jail for filing a false police report and for taking your seven thousand dollars. Jessie also tells me he has been stalking you and harassing you; we will get a restraining order.”
Now I was hugging Mr. Anderson. He was going to fix it, make it all better, and I had nothing to say. Just more tears.
“It’s okay M, Dad is going to get you out soon, and I will take you home so you can shower.”
“I think it is safe to say I love both of you so much right now.” I said in a sniffled voice.
“Love me once you’re out. Come on let’s prepare for court.” Mr. Anderson smiled as he spoke.
Three hours later I was walking out of jail with a smile on my face and relief in my heart. I wasn’t going to have to spend another night in that filthy environment. Jessie’s dad was really magnificent in the court room. He not only got me released from jail but he was able to get me released on my own recognizance so I didn’t have to come up with any funds in order to be free. He said his next step was going to be getting the whole case thrown out for a lack of evidence. Hopefully he would be able to get that finished by mid next week, at the latest.
“Miss Escapee you ready to go home?” Jessie looked good leaning on his car with his arms crossed and a big smile on his face.
“Yes but I don’t like that implied statement that I am breaking out illegally. I don’t need any more trouble.”
“Now now, you know what I mean, come on Ms. Smith, your mom and dad are anxiously awaiting your return.” Jessie opened up his passenger door for me and I slipped inside. When the door shut I suddenly started to cry again. His driver side door opened up and he slipped into the car. “Hey now why are you crying? What happened in the six seconds it took me to get into the car?”
“I am just so happy to be out of there, Jessie it was horrible. I want this nightmare to be done.”
“You could just give him the ring back you know.”
I looked over at him to see if he was serious, “No, he cheated on me with my own cousin, who knows how many of times, and I just caught him three days after he gave it to me.”
“I did a little Googling, and it is custom that the woman return the ring.”
Jessie turned on the car, then pulled out into the street and began driving towards Kemah. I didn’t like that it felt as if Jessie didn’t have my back on this one. I thought he, and everyone in my life, agreed what Albert did was wrong, and I was in the right, but maybe I wasn’t.
“Hypothetically if I did give it back to him we don’t know that he would back off at this point because I did keep it for so long now.”
“I think he would back off. I mean, I don’t know him like you did but if I were him I would.”
“None of this is fair, he is the one who broke my heart and ripped my world apart, and I am the one suffering through everything because of his choices.”
“I know you’re in pain Merewyn but just think about it okay?”
Jessie seemed sincere in his concern and I knew that he had a point in his own way, but I didn’t want to back down. “I feel like if I backed down then he would be winning, and I am tired of him winning. He has hurt me over and over and I am just sick of it.” I crossed my arms and looked out the window for a while.
“I’ll think about it, but I doubt I’ll change my mind.” I said after about ten minutes of silence.
“That’s all I can ask for, you think about it.”
The remaining time in the car driving to my home was left in silence. I had no desire for anything more talking wise and I still just wanted a shower. I saw my mother looking out of the window as we pulled into the drive way. I was relieved to use her as an excuse to get out of the tension filled car.
“There’s my mom I am sure she is worried sick, I’ll talk to you later Jessie. Thank you for everything and thank your dad for me okay?”
“Merewyn, I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have anything to be sorry for Jessie I know you are just helping me and trying to do the best things for me. Honestly you have nothing to worry about.”
“May I call you later?”
I shook my head back and forth, “No I need a bit of space. I just, I need to relax, it has nothing to do with you just me okay?”
He nodded his head a couple times and I knew I had hurt him. “Now I’m sorry.” I said to him. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings I really just need some alone time okay?”
“I know Merewyn.” He said with almost a sulking tone.
“When your dad gets this cleared up for me, will you come with me to go apartment hunting?”
“Apartment hunting?” He questioned.
“Yeah, I need my own space, and I just, don’t think it’s good for me to still be living with my mom and dad, you know?”
“I know. Sure, I’ll be glad to help you, once it is all cleared up and you’re ready to go looking.”
That gave me a smile, an honest to God real smile. “Thanks Jessie, again for everything.” I leaned over across the seat and kissed him on the cheek. “You’re really a good friend; you’ve been there for me so much in such a short time. I could never repay you.”
“No need to M. Tell your folks my dad will fix this okay? Call me when you’re ready.”
With a bit of reluctance, I left the car and watched him drive away. The front door of my home opened up and my mother came outside looking at me. Her eyes were bloodshot, her face looked a bit swollen. I knew she probably had been crying just as much as I had been.
“Hey Mom.”
“Hi honey, are you okay?”
“I don’t know if I will ever be okay again, but yeah I am fine.”
“Come on in, I am sure you want a shower, and a hot meal. I’ve had some chicken noodle soup waiting on you.”
“Homemade?” I asked.
“Of course, do I make it any other way?”
That made me laugh and smile, walking up the concrete sidewalk and into her embrace was the happiest part of my day. There was absolutely nothing that felt better than feeling your mother’s arms wrapping around you in a time of need.
“Mom I’m sorry.”
“Stop it you did nothing wrong I will not have you apologize again do you understand me young lady.”
I nodded and cried into her shoulder. I couldn’t help it. I felt like I was an emotional rollercoaster. One minute I am smiling, the next I am balling my eyes out with tears. “Okay,” I said softly, as she continued to stroke my back and sooth me. Just like she did to me when I was a child and needed my mother.
“Merewyn is that you?” My dad’s voice traveled through the house and I could hear him even though we were standing outside of the front door.
“Yes Dad, I’m here with Mom.”
He came rushing through the hallway and joined my mother and I in an embrace. “Oh baby girl I am so glad you are home safe.”
“It was horrible Daddy, I hated it.”
Great now I sounded like the age of a child that they were treating me. I really did need to move as soon as I was able too. I can’t keep clinging to them; I need to stand on my own two feet.
“Come on go shower then we will eat.” Mom said.
Dad nodded his head in agreement and said, “Yes yes go shower that will fix so much.”
I pushed away from the two parents who couldn’t be more devoted or better than these two and wiped my fingers across my eyes and nodded once, “Okay, yeah, I’ll be back shortly.”
My feet lead me across the tile hallway and into the bathroom that was connected to my bedroom. I moved the shower curtain aside and turned on the water. I set it to the hottest setting that I could tolerate. When I turned around to look into the mirror the image that came back haunted me. I looked defeated, like I had given up already. That angered me. Albert wasn’t going to win and I was a fighter. I pulled my wallet out of my pocket and tossed it onto the counter. Then I kicked my shoes off and stepped out of my pants and underwear. I wanted to burn them after where they had been with me. I tossed my shirt into the pile then my bra. When I stepped into the shower the scalding hot water burned my skin for about thirty seconds before my body adjusted to the temperature.
As I stood under the spray of water I felt the grime and dirt traveling down my skin and eventually off of me. It felt marvelous with the water and soap on my body. While I was stressed to the max a shower always calmed my nerves and gave me clarity while in search for a solution. I wasn’t sure how much time had passed but I knew that my parents were waiting on me. I reached down and turned the water off and let the steam around me disappear. Mom always bought the best towels. The one I was using this week was a light pink colored one that felt as soft as velvet. It was so large that it wrapped around me one and a half times.
The motion of drying off rhythmically calmed to my mind and brought it some somber peace. It was during this that the solution to the problem of the ring hit me. Jessie did some Googling, I can Google too. Just because he found that the proper etiquette was to give the ring back, I am sure that somewhere out there in the world is a judge who stood behind a woman who was cheated on and let her keep the damn ring. The ring that was supposed to be a symbol of love and affection, most importantly devotion to the relationship.
I was going to find my precedent. Judges love when someone else has already set the stage. This would be my cure all and then I would be able to move out and start my new life. One that was fresh and free of the Albert stress. I walked into my bedroom and pulled on a light green pair of sweatpants and my sports bra and matching workout top. I combed out my hair and pulled it up into a pony tail. After reviewing how I looked in the mirror I felt much more like myself and I was ready to go face the world.
The smell of the homemade chicken noodle soup permeated my senses when I opened the door to my room and walked into the hallway.
“Mom it smells like you outdid yourself again. Wow.”
“Thanks baby, come on and sit down by your dad I will start pouring the soup into the bowls. Then we can all decide on a game plan together.”
“If it’s all the same to you mom I would like to just enjoy the rest of the night and not talk about it okay?”
“Sure thing Merewyn. No problem.”
I walked into the dining room where I saw dad on his cell phone. “What ya doing Dad?”
“Just texting your friend Jessie.”
“Why are you texting him?” What was the deal with my parents and their love for him? I do not remember them being this enamored by his charm when we were dating back in school.
“Nothing I just like keeping him up to date. I saw that you were upset when he left you at the door so I wanted to tell him that we were taking care of you and that it was okay now.”
“Dad please just let me deal with Jessie on my own terms. I don’t need you and Mom playing match maker.”
“I’m not playing matchmaker I am just being courteous.”
“Tomato tomatoh, either way please Dad stay out of Jessie and my friendship.”
“Okay sweetie I will.” Dad put his cell phone in his pocket and smiled at me. “Sit down Merewyn and tell me, how is work is going.”
That’s exactly what I needed, to talk about work. Something innocent and free of drama. Leave it to Dad to help me the most.
“It’s going great, I really love working with the small businesses and times are picking up too. I think our little city is on the brink of a boom.”
“Oh that’s good to hear,” Mom said as she came in the room with a tray full of food. “Now enough shop talk, let’s eat.”