Chapter 17

Mason

I couldn't sleep a fucking lick that night. Eva had gotten into my mind the moment she had accused my mother of being batshit crazy and claimed she could take all of our money because of it. I had been absolutely fuming the rest of the evening. When Ash invited me to go inside, I desperately wanted to go in. I wanted to lose myself between her legs and bury my face in her tits and fuck her until she screamed my name because I had completely forgotten it myself.

But dear Jesus, the last thing I wanted to do was deal with her fucked-up best friend.

I knew that not escorting her to her door had been a major mistake. If I didn't figure out what the fuck I was going to do, I was going to end up ruining everything with Ash. But Eva's voice had kept ricocheting off the corners of my mind the whole fucking limo ride.

Her insinuation that I could never be with Ash because I was supposed to be with her made me absolutely livid. Did everyone around me really think I had absolutely no control over my life, that I couldn't even pick the person I spent the rest of it with? The thought of it, even a couple of weeks ago, wouldn't have bothered me until Winston had made me do that stupid bet.

That dumbass bet had brought me out of the little bubble I’d created for myself when my father had died. That shit had never been good enough for Winston. Oh, no. My batshit crazy best friend had to pull me out of the world I’d created for myself because god forbid anyone live their life any way but his way!

Did anyone stop to think I’d accepted things because shit just happened? Like death and bullshit and taxes and sickness? That shit just happened!

But had I not done that stupid bet, I would’ve never made that stupid profile, and if I hadn’t made that stupid profile, I never would’ve found the most dynamic, beautiful, witty woman I had the pleasure of knowing.

And I fucking let Eva ruin it.

I tossed and turned all night. I kept seeing Ash in my dreams, and every time she was there, I ended up hurting her somehow. I stood her up on a date, or I failed to remember to pick her up from somewhere. On a couple occasions, I cheated, and once I even yelled at her so harshly that she cried.

She cried in every fucking nightmare I had that night, and every time she cried, I ripped myself from my sleep and felt my heart break just a little bit. They were so real and so vivid. The fourth time I woke up, my pajamas were completely soaked through with sweat.

“Shit,” I muttered.

By the time the sun rose that morning, I knew I had to sort things out with her. I grabbed my phone, opened up a new message to her, and I asked her if she wanted to meet me for brunch.

“Up early I see,” she messaged back.

“I really need to talk to you. Please,” I said.

“What time does brunch take place? I don’t think us down here know what a brunch is.”

I couldn’t tell if she was being witty or if she was angry, and honestly, I couldn’t blame her if it was the latter. Eva had been a thorough bitch all evening, and Ash had put up with enough of that from having Frank in her life. Instead of taking her to do whatever she wanted to do on her Friday evening, I’d made her come with me to some dumbass function neither of us had wanted to be at. She had compromised whatever would have made her happy in order to do what I wanted, and at that very moment, I realized what I had turned into.

I had turned into every other person in her life who used and took advantage of her.

“It’s all on me. I’ll come pick you up. I’ll take you to eat wherever you want, and we can talk about last night. Please?”

I waited for what seemed like ages for her to respond. Maybe she’d fallen back asleep or gotten in the shower, but I sat there at the edge of my bed and stared at my phone the entire time.

Then finally, the text message I was hoping to see popped up on the screen.

“See you around 10. I can meet up for a bit before work.”

Work. Another thing that seemed to separate us. Other than what Frank had blurted out the other night, I knew nothing about what she did. And to be honest, my family hadn’t had to work for generations. I mean, my father did a bit of maintenance and trading on the stock market in order to enhance what we had and shift some things around so it would be insured and protected, but he never really had an occupation.

It was one of the perks that came with my family, and it was something my great-great-grandfather had slaved over tirelessly to build. We respected it, we treated it with reverence, and even though we lived in opulence, we were never unnecessary spenders. My mother didn’t renovate the kitchen four times a year, and I didn’t buy a new suit for every occasion, but we did live a life that boasted of our wealth.

We traveled, we looked impeccable in the finest clothes, and we did what we wanted when we wanted because we never worked.

I got out of bed and got myself ready, and when I was satisfied with how I looked, I ran down the stairs and out to the driver. I told him we were going to Ash’s, and when I got into the back of the car, I felt my phone vibrate.

“There’s a place not too far from my work. Here’s the address.”

I showed the address to my driver, and he recalculated where he was going. Even with me having to come down her way and navigate around, I ended up getting there before she did. I got us the best seats they had, which overlooked the bustling streets of downtown, and, without thinking, ordered us two extra strong mimosas.

“Hey there, Mason,” I heard her say. I stood up and smiled at her, but before I could catch her eye, she spotted the drinks.

“I went ahead and ordered you one,” I said. “Figured we could use it after last night.”

“Mason, I can’t drink before work. Do you drink before work?”

She looked up at me, and it was the second stark difference between us that hit me in less than an hour. I motioned for the waitress to get Ash a water. When we sat down, Ash eyed me carefully.

“I wish I had a job that let me drink beforehand,” she said, smirking.

“I don’t work,” I said.

“Oh, well. There’s that option, too.”

“A water for the miss,” the waiter said, smiling.

Ash smiled back. “Thank you very much.”

They were only two little differences between us, but they culminated into entirely different lifestyles. All I could really do was be honest with her, but I knew the tone of this conversation wasn’t going to be quite what I was hoping it would be.

“First off, I want to apologize for last night,” I said.

She brushed it off. “Don’t worry about it.”

“No, hear me out. What Eva was doing and saying was wrong, and I should’ve put my foot down rather than saving face and enduring it.”

She nodded. “Yes, you should’ve.”

“It just doesn’t work that way. With that type of people and the connections they have to your life, you can’t just stomp on them like that.”

“Even when they are insulting your date?” Ash asked. She wasn’t being snarky or mean. She was simply curious. It was yet another distinction between the life I lived and the life she lived, and I wasn’t sure I really understood how to explain it to her.

It was just something you had to grow up in and experience for yourself.

“You know I don’t want you for your money or your lifestyle, right?” she asked. “That’s not why I enjoy spending time with you.”

“Oh, god,” I said. “No. I know that completely.”

“Are the two of you ready?” the waiter asked.

“I’m not hungry,” Ash said lightly.

“Come on, eat something,” I urged.

“No, really, the water’s fine,” she said.

“Please, Ash. Even just a bowl of fruit?”

“I’m not hungry, Mason.”

“I’ll come back in a bit,” the waiter said before walking away.

“Can I say something?” Ash asked.

“Anything.”

“It’s glaringly obvious to me that we have many differences in the way we live our lives and the way we were raised. Being in that ballroom, surrounded by all those people, made that painfully clear. But I still want to get to know you. Like, actually know you. Know your hobbies and where you’ve traveled and what television shows you enjoy watching. I want to know those things.”

Shit. She was here talking about what we would do in the future, and I still had to address something I knew was going to piss her off.

“Actually, Ash, I wanted to talk to you about that rift.”

She sighed. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“No, just listen. I’ll be honest. I am worried about the extreme differences between the two of us. I love spending time with you, and I think you’re wonderful, but the people I’m around are not going to accept you as easily as Winston did.”

“I take it Winston’s just different,” she deadpanned.

“In ways you can only imagine.”

“But you’re saying that because I don’t fit in, I can’t be with you,” she said.

“No. I like you. A lot. And I enjoy spending time with you. A lot. But I am worried that if things progress with us, all our differences will do is end up hurting you.”

Ash chuckled breathlessly. “I’m not meeting your family tomorrow, Mason. I just want to spend more time with you.”

“I know, and I get that. But can’t you at least see where I’m coming from?”

“I suppose…”

“Our differences will get rough quickly. I don’t work, so there will always be a clashing of schedules because I’ll want you at times I can’t have you. When I take you out places and treat you to things, I’ll always have to keep things like your work schedule in mind, which I’m not used to, and it will take some time to learn. Your quirkiness makes me smile, but you saw how other people reacted to it last night. In your world, being different and quirky is valued. But in my world, blending in and acting alike is what’s valued.”

“If I need to dye my hair a different—”

“No,” I said quickly. I caught her gaze, and I saw the shock roll over her face. I knew this part of the conversation would eventually roll around because of the type of person she was.

“You will not change for them. For any of them. Do you understand me?”

“But if it’s to be with you—”

“Absolutely not. I like you the way you are.”

She sat back in her seat, defeated. When the waiter came around, I ordered us both a round of pancakes and a bowl of fruit for the table. Ash stared out at the street before she checked her watch, and we both just sat in silence until the food arrived.

Then, one of our big differences reared its head after I watched her pop a grape into her mouth.

“I’m late for work,” she murmured.

“Of course,” I said, nodding. “Let me walk you out.”

“I got it. I’m good. You just eat.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to take any of this with you? Ash, you’re going to get hungry before lunch.”

She sighed. “Who the fuck cares anymore?” she said.

It killed a part of me to know I’d hurt her. I spent all night in my dreams hurting her and breaking pieces of my soul I hadn’t known existed until I’d met her. Now here I was watching her sigh and choke back real sobs because of the bullshit topic of conversation I knew had to be addressed.

“It’s bullshit, I know,” I said.

“I have to get to work,” she mumbled.

“Talk to me,” I urged her.

“Oh, like you did to me last night? Fine,” she spat before she dropped back into her seat. “I’ll talk.”