Sebastian tossed and turned all night, replaying the whole event over and over. He kept seeing her face, shocked and upset, horrified maybe, at what he’d said. And the things he’d said to her were horrible things. She should be appalled at him. He was appalled at himself.

The worst part was, he didn’t mean what he’d said. No, he’d never done relationships before, that was true. Not in the usual sense. But, he was starting to have feelings for her, and he was considering a real relationship for the first time. He’d hadn’t made up his mind, but even considering it was a huge step for him.

Okay, so the baby thing had shaken him up. It came from out of nowhere and it wasn’t something on his mind at all. He wanted kids. Some day. Maybe his some day was getting closer now that he was in his late 30s. The more he thought about it, the stupider he felt. He was getting older. If he was going to have a family, he needed to be doing it soon. He didn’t have ten years to wait anymore.

And having a family meant finding someone he could marry. Not just have an arrangement with, but actually love and be with. And the whole thing terrified him. This is why he’d never settled before. How could he promise someone that he’d be reliable, that he’d be there and not fail her? He didn’t think he had it in him. And that’s why Amelia seemed different. She made him feel like he could. Like he was a good man, and could do good things.

When he woke, he was raw with fatigue and emotion. He got dressed and headed right for the guest house. He had to talk to her right away.

He knocked on the door and waited. And waited. The car was there. But then he realized her car, her original beater that he’d been planning to sell for parts, was gone. His heart lurched and he reached in his pocket for the keys. He unlocked the door.

“Amelia?” In case she was there, he didn’t want to startle her by just coming in.

He went into the hall and called to her as he walked through the house. The baby items were gone. The painting supplies were gone. He went upstairs and found the bedroom empty, the bed made. She had gone.

He sat on the bed for a moment, thinking. Well, she’d be at the office. He still knew where to find her. Why hadn’t he gotten her a cell phone or paid to turn hers back on? That was a stupid move. He should have made a way that he could get in contact with her.

No, idiot. Because you didn’t want this, remember? He shook his head and went to get ready to go into the office.

When he got there, he called down to Jacob. “Could you send Miss Foley to my office, please?”

“I’m sorry sir, she called out sick today.”

“She did? Did she happen to say where she was?”

“No. I assume at home.”

“Thank you.”

He put the phone down and took to pacing his office. Where had she gone? Where could she be? He needed someone to track her down. His next call was to Craig. He explained what had happened and told his assistant to have someone find her, follow her, and contact him immediately when she was found.

“Craig,” he said giving him a stark look. “Interrupt me no matter who I’m with, how important the meeting is, or what I’m doing.”

“Will do.”

“And I mean, if I’m in the bathroom, don’t wait. Knock and tell me you found her.”

He nodded. “I will.”

He trusted Craig and knew he’d get the best private investigators on this. But they could only do so much. If someone didn’t leave a trail, if they didn’t want to be found, it could be hard to find them. He didn’t have a lot of info on her. He was already tracking her expense account, but it hadn’t been used. Her file gave him the basics on her, but unless she went some place obvious, like her mothers, she would be hard to trace.

She didn’t have credit cards or a checking account. She must not have had the money to get either, so she’d have cash. Probably not much of it, either, since she hadn’t been paid yet. Someone was already on route to her mother’s house, but it was several hours away.

Working that day was difficult. His mind wandered and he called Craig several times to see if there was an update. There wasn’t, of course. Craig would have called him when there was something to tell.

Craig came to his office later in the day. “I have an update, but it’s small.”

Sebastian blew out a breath. “Where is she?”

“We don’t know yet.”

His clenched his jaw. “Then what’s the update?”

“I have someone watching her mother’s house. But, I don’t think her mother lives there any longer. Her name is still on the lease, but we haven’t seen her and there’s a young man living there. Amelia doesn’t have any siblings, but we suspect he may be a relative.”

“And Amelia hasn’t been there?”

“No.”

“Her car? No one has found it?”

“Not yet. I have several people working on this. We’ll find her.”

“Thanks, Craig.”

“I understand how important she is to you.” He turned to leave, but stopped with his hand on the door. “Are you still going through with your plans for tonight?”

He thought to his calendar for the day. “What plans?”

“It’s Friday. Your birthday? You had planned an evening out. Would you like me to cancel for you?”

He grabbed his phone and checked the date. His head had been so messed up, he thought it was Thursday. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “No, that’s fine. I’ll be there.” He could use a few stiff drinks anyhow.

Later that evening, sitting at dinner with his family and a few friends, Sebastian stared into his fourth drink of the night. Craig had said he knew how important Amelia was to him. Why had it taken Sebastian so long to figure it out?

“So, Sebastian,” his mother said. “You’re only two years away from the big four-oh now. Do you think I’ll get any grandbabies soon?”

“You have grandchildren, Mother.”

“Yes.” She sighed. “Thank God for your sister. But I’d like some little Sebastians as well. And I’d like to see you settled.”

“I second that!” his sister said.

“I third it!” his brother-in-law said.

“There comes a point, son.” His father put his hand on Sebastian’s shoulder. “Where you have to realize you’re not going to live forever, and your money isn’t going to keep you warm at night.”

“I know,” Sebastian said. “And I may have lost the first women I’ve ever considered having a future with.”

His sister gasped.

“Addison?” his mother asked.

Sebastian had almost forgotten about the woman he currently had under contract as his “girlfriend.” He probably should have invited her tonight. He tried to keep in touch with his girlfriends at least once a week when he had one. It’d been a few weeks since he’d called or texted her, and it was in the contract that she shouldn’t contact him unless there was an emergency.

“No,” Sebastian said. “This is… different.”

Craig looked over at him and pressed his lips together. He didn’t say anything, but the look on his face said it all. Even his assistant had known he had feelings for Amelia. It was that obvious. So, why hadn’t he? Why wouldn’t he admit it?

“But, I think I messed it up,” Sebastian said.

“Well, you let us talk to her,” his sister said. “We’ll get her to come around.”

“I hope you do get to talk to her someday.”

When he got home that night, he lay on his huge, empty bed, the room spinning around him. In that moment, he made two decisions. The first was he needed to end his contract with Addison. Let her move on since he had no intention of needing her for public appearances any time soon. And the second. When he found Amelia, to make his feelings known, to get over whatever hang ups he had before, and to be the man she needed him to be. To be the father of her child, if that’s what she wanted.

He fell asleep, picturing for the first time, himself and a wife and child, all together as a family.