Rachel sat at her desk in her classroom, grading papers. The students had all gone home an hour ago, and the silence they’d left behind made it easy to get her work done for the next Monday.

Not that she needed to finish up anything quickly. She had all weekend to prepare for next week’s classes. At twenty-nine, Rachel was done with the partying-every-weekend thing, and right now, her relationship status was glaringly single. She’d broken up with her last boyfriend almost six months ago and not even gone on so much as a date since then.

She sighed as she took the papers and began to enter the grades into the computer. A part of her had always thought she’d be in a different spot in her life at this point. But, ever since Sean, she hadn’t found anyone who made her feel the way he had. And, sometimes, she wondered what would’ve happened if she had moved to Chicago with him.

She looked up from her computer. But it was too late now. He’d been gone for four years, and there was no going back on her decision at this point.

As she entered in the final grades, she couldn’t help but stare at the spot where the last six assignments were missing on Brian Hansen’s row. Each blank space was like a pinch to her heart. She should probably delete his name from her spreadsheet, but she hadn’t been able to do so yet. There was something so final about the whole thing.

Brian had been a shy, smart student who didn’t say much in front of the class. But, when he’d had one-on-one time, he had never been afraid to ask her questions. She’d loved his thirst for learning. She knew she shouldn’t have favorites, but he was one of hers this year.

When Brian hadn’t come to class a few days in a row, Rachel had begun to worry. It was normal for kids to miss school, but they usually only missed one or two days. The principal had informed her that Brian was in the hospital with meningitis. Rachel wasn’t particularly religious, but she’d gone home and prayed for her student every night.

But, when she had seen the principal walk into her room a week and a half ago, she hadn’t even had to say anything before Rachel’s worst fear for her bright student had come true. The meningitis had taken poor sweet Brian much too soon. He’d only been ten years old.

Last weekend had been his funeral, which Rachel and many other teachers had attended. It was the saddest thing Rachel had ever experienced, and she never wanted to go to a funeral for someone so young again.

She finished entering the grades and closed her laptop. She stared at Brian’s empty desk for a few minutes before she realized that she didn’t want to go home. Something about losing her student had really shaken her up, and for some reason, it made her realize how lonely she was.

That was probably why she’d been thinking about Sean more than usual lately. She still remembered how he’d come home from his twenty-first birthday celebration early and held her while she was sick and gross.

What she wouldn’t do to feel a lover’s embrace around her again. Someone to go home to, someone to hold her while she cried her tears, and someone to make love to her and tell her it would all be okay again even if it wouldn’t.

There was a knock on Rachel’s classroom door, and she saw the red hair of her coworker and friend Shelly as she opened the door.

“Hey, a couple of us are going out for dinner and drinks. You want to come?”

Anything to not go home to an empty house right now. “Yes.”

“Great. Can you be ready in thirty?”

“Yep. I’m ready now.”

“Grab your stuff, and come keep me company while I finish up in my room.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Rachel sat at the booth with Shelly on her side and two of their other coworkers, Julie and Laura, across from them. While Rachel and Shelly taught fourth grade, Julie taught second, and Laura taught third.

“How are you holding up?” Julie asked Rachel.

“Okay. You?”

Julie had taught Brian in second grade and seemed just as sad about Brian as she did.

“Same. It sure puts things into perspective. I go home every night and give my baby a tight squeeze.”

“Me, too,” Laura said. “Although mine isn’t a baby anymore and doesn’t let me hug him for long.”

Julie had a new husband and a six-month-old daughter at home while Laura was a single mom to a four-year-old son. Thankfully, Laura’s own mother lived with her and her son and was able to help out a lot.

“I just get to go home and hug Joe,” Shelly joked. She hadn’t been married to her husband, Joe, very long, and they had yet to have kids.

They all giggled.

Rachel picked up her glass. “Better than me. I go home and hug my cat.” Her eyes widened. “Oh my God, I’m going to be an old cat lady someday.” Rachel was half-kidding, but deep down, part of her worried it would be true.

Shelly bumped her shoulder against Rachel’s. “No, you won’t. But, if you’re that worried, I can always set you up with my cousin.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“I’ll…think about it.”

Shelly’s mouth dropped. “Really?”

Rachel rolled her eyes. “Why not?”

“Yes,” Shelly said.

Shelly had been trying to set Rachel up with her cousin for months, but every time Shelly asked, Rachel would say no. Rachel had been set up on blind dates before, and they always turned out less than okay. But, now, she figured she might as well go for it. If anything, it would get Shelly to stop asking.

The four of them ate dinner and ordered another round of drinks. As their cups got emptier, the other three women talked of going home to their families. Rachel had been having a good time, but now, she was beginning to feel lonely again. Part of it was thoughts of Brian, and part of it was the alcohol. The two together were not a good combination.

Rachel waited for about another half hour for her drinks to work their way out of her system, so she could drive home. But, as the other three started talking about their plans for the weekend, she excused herself to go to the restroom.

Their booth was in the front of the restaurant, and the restrooms were in the back. As she made her way there, Rachel decided she needed to do something to get out of the house that weekend. She could always go visit her parents, but now that they had an empty nest, they always seemed to have plans.

She was so lost in thought that she didn’t quite watch where she was walking, and she tripped on the leg of a chair.

An arm reached out to catch her, and she heard a voice say, “Whoa.”

She closed her eyes for a moment because it sounded so achingly familiar. She really needed to stop thinking about Sean.

She turned to thank the gentleman who had broken her fall thank you, but when she saw his face, the words got stuck in her throat.

“Rachel?”

It was Sean standing in front of her.

“Sean. Wow.” She studied him. “You look great.”

And he truly did. His blond hair was a little darker and styled differently than four years ago. He had a close-trimmed beard on his face, but it suited him. And his ocean-blue eyes were the same. Beautiful with a couple of more laugh lines around them. She noticed that Sean had gained a few more pounds of muscle. He was still thin, but she could see the definition of his biceps and pecs under his shirt.

But, mostly, he looked like home to her.

She hadn’t realized exactly how much she missed him until that moment. Over the years, she’d tried to find him online, hoping that he would one day change his mind about social media so that she would have a chance to Facebook-stalk him. But she’d never been able to find him. She hadn’t seen Sean for four years, and right now, all she wanted to do was throw herself into his arms.

“What are you doing here?” Rachel asked him.

He shrugged and smiled like he was embarrassed. “I live here.”

She put her hand on her throat. “You moved back?”

He smiled again. “Guilty.”

“Sean, introduce me.”

Until that moment, her eyes had only been on Sean, but she now looked at his table to see that he was having dinner with someone. A woman someone. A beautiful, blonde-haired, green-eyed someone.

He was on a date.

The night couldn’t get any worse.

“Teri, this is Rachel. We knew each other back in college. Rachel, this is Teri, my—”

Rachel stuck out her hand, cutting Sean off. “Hi, Teri. Nice to meet you.” She didn’t want to hear—couldn’t hear Sean say that Teri was his girlfriend. Not when she’d been thinking about him all week.

Teri shook Rachel’s hand, and as soon as she dropped it, Rachel stepped back.

“I’m sorry. I have to…go.” She spun on her heel and went straight back to the booth, forgetting all about trying to make it to the restroom.

Rachel grabbed her coat and purse when she reached the booth.

“Rach?” Shelly asked.

“I’m sorry. I have to go. Something came up.”

“Are you okay to drive?”

Now that Rachel felt like a cold bucket of water had been dumped on her head, she was as sober as could be. Sean hadn’t even introduced her as his ex-girlfriend. She was just someone he’d known from college.

“Yep.”

“Is everything okay?”

“It will be.” Once she escaped from the restaurant and bawled her eyes out. “Please don’t worry. I’ll call you later.”

Shelly bit her lip, and her eyes were full of concern. “Okay,” she said reluctantly.

“Bye,” Rachel said, trying to give her friends one last sincere smile before she practically ran for the door.

She broke into a sprint once outside and made it to her car in record time.

Once she closed the door, Rachel wanted to put her head on the steering wheel and cry, but she couldn’t. What if Sean and his girlfriend walk outside and see me? No way could she handle that kind of humiliation right now.

She hadn’t realized until that moment that a part of her always thought she and Sean would get back together someday. But he had moved back and hadn’t even called her. He had a girlfriend.

That horrible conclusion went through her at the thought of Sean moving back to Minnesota for his girlfriend when Rachel hadn’t been enough to get him to stay. The realization made her feel depressed, foolish, and humiliated. Even if no one else knew she hadn’t been good enough, Rachel knew.

Rachel slammed the car into reverse and then drive. She peeled out of the restaurant and hurried home as fast as the speed limits allowed.

When she arrived home, she ended up standing in the entryway of her apartment, staring at the floor. Not knowing what else to do, she let her keys, purse, and jacket fall to the floor and walked down the hall to her room. As she made her way there, she stripped off her shoes and clothes. She could pick them up tomorrow.

She went straight to her bathroom and turned on the shower. Only after the water was warm and she stepped inside did Rachel give herself permission to let go and cry.