As soon as the door closes behind Kacee, Penelope turns on me. I’m ready for it, of course, but I’m worked up and angry, and more than ready to argue with her.

"You know, you came off like a total jerk," Penelope shouts.

I throw my hands up in the air. “Good! What were you thinking, bringing a stranger up here like that after you know how I feel about that? You weren’t thinking, that’s the problem.”

"She's not a stranger, she's my best friend," Penelope argues. "You never met her because you live like a hermit and refuse to visit me."

“I live in the mountains for a good reason,” I snap. “You just said you were coming back up, you didn’t say you were bringing another person with you. What if she was crazy or something? Or the kids don’t like her?”

She rolls her eyes at me. "The kids are going to meet people they don't like. That's life. They're gonna have to get used to it because you're not going to be able to keep them up here and protect them for the rest of their lives. And it sure seemed like they liked her just fine."

"Right now, she's alone in there with them," I say, my heart pounding. I turn to glance through the window. Kacee is sitting on the sofa, talking to Evie and Jackson. "How do I know whether or not I can trust her? How do I know—"

“Parker. You don’t. That’s how the world works. I’m asking you to trust me. I wouldn’t bring someone up here that’s going to hurt my niece and nephew. I’m looking out for them because I love them and they deserve the best.”

“I do trust you,” I tell her. “I do, I just—”

"Parker," Penelope interrupts me. "I know you're scared. Change is scary. But I promise you, Kacee is sweet and caring, and you'd see if you gave her a chance." She steps forward, reaching out and taking my hands, squeezing them tightly.

I sigh.

“But you need to get over yourself and let go,” she says sternly.

“But I—”

“Parker,” Penelope repeats. “It’s not about you. It’s about Evie and Jackson.”

Penelope motions toward the house and I pull away from her to look through the window again. Evie and Jackson have already set up a board game on the coffee table and seem to be teaching Kacee the rules. All three of them are laughing and having a good time.

"You're not doing them any favors by not giving them a chance at an education. I know you want to keep them safe, but they can't live their lives being secluded forever. They're children now, they're not babies anymore. They need an education, friends, and socialization. They need to do things that aren't in the woods with people who aren't you or me. They need that, Parker. You owe them that at least. Give them a chance to grow and develop."

I glare down at her. I feel two halves at war inside myself. One half struggles to let go, still holding tight to the idea that Evie and Jackson will be safer if I keep them here. I can protect them here, I know I can. The other half of me knows Penelope is right, and I can't provide them with everything they need. I scoff at Penelope telling me I can't teach my own children, but I know there's some truth to it.

I sigh again. Penelope takes my hand again and holds it tight.

“I know this is hard,” Penelope whispers. “Please give her a chance. I think you could really use her help and will grow to like her.”

"I don't want it," I say roughly, pulling my hand free from Penelope's grasp and turning away from her. I'm getting emotional, and I just want to keep it all bottled up inside. I walk to my front door and shoulder it open, but Evie and Jackson are talking too loudly over each other for anyone to notice me.

Kacee is sitting on the couch with Evie and Jackson, the three of them all bending over a board game set up on top of the coffee table. Jackson is jabbering, making up a backstory for the two-game pawns he has in his hands. Evie is shouting over him, trying to explain the rules of the game to Kacee. Kacee, for her part, is nodding encouragingly, asking questions now and then that Evie seems all too happy to answer. Kacee says something I don't catch, and Evie and Jackson both burst out laughing.

I lean in the doorway, watching. Evie and Jackson look like they're having more fun than they've had in a long time. They undoubtedly already adore Kacee, who is talking to them like they're two small adults, instead of like kids. I always hate when people talk down to children. I look at Kacee a little harder, a little deeper. I don't want to think about it, but she's gorgeous. She has long blonde hair braided down her back, and some loose strands have blown free. Her brilliant green eyes watch my kids, and I notice her face full of freckles. When she laughs, her head falls back. She's shorter than me by over a foot and has curves that could kill. Something in me just wants to hold her close.

I force myself not to continue those thoughts. Looking at Kacee, I have to make a conscious effort not to think of what a life with her would be like. Instead, I wonder if this is what life would've been like if Rebecca was still here. Had my wife never died, would Evie and Jackson be happily playing these games with her, laughing and having a good time?

Penelope taps my shoulder from behind, and I shake myself out of my own head and clear my throat, letting Kacee and the kids know I’m here. They all look up at me. Evie and Jackson look fairly curious and excited, while Kacee looks afraid.

"Can I talk to you?" I ask Kacee. She still seems petrified, but she nods, standing, smoothing down her green dress. I jerk my head toward the kitchen and go there without waiting for her since I'm already having such a difficult time looking at her and not thinking about things I shouldn't.

By the time I get to the farthest corner of the kitchen, Penelope has herded Evie and Jackson away, distracting them with their board game so they can’t eavesdrop. Kacee walks toward me hesitantly, stopping at more than an arm’s length away. I figure that’s probably for the best. I drop my arms to my side, not wanting to intimidate her any more than she already is. This isn’t her fault, and I try to remember that.

“I’m not so sure about this,” I say. I’ve always been bad at small talk. She blinks at me, then furrows her brow. “I’m doing just fine on my own. I don’t know what my sister was thinking, but I’m good. You can go home,” I tell her matter-of-factly.

Kacee stares up at me in silence for a beat, like she’s considering something and isn’t sure how to say it. In a moment, her expression shifts and I watch her warily.

"I wasn't so sure, either," Kacee says. "Not after how you responded to seeing me, and to Penelope telling you who I was and why I was here. But…" Kacee glances over her shoulder at Evie and Jackson, the two of them sitting at the coffee table while Penelope talks to them quietly. Jackson looks up and makes eye contact with Kacee, and he waves his little hand at her. Kacee waves back.

"But," Kacee continues, and I make eye contact with her. "Based on what Penelope said and what Evie and Jackson just told me, you do need my help. I'm really sorry if I'm overstepping," she rushes to say before I can interrupt her. "But I've worked with kids for a long time, and I really think you could use me here. I'm willing to give my help and do anything I can for them."

I glare at her. It’s bad enough when Penelope tells me I’m not doing a good enough job with my kids, but it’s another thing entirely when a stranger says it, no matter how pretty she is.

"I want to help you," Kacee adds when it becomes clear I'm not going to reply. She glances back over her shoulder at Evie and Jackson again, and I follow her eyes to them. "For their sakes, especially. Not for yours or mine. They need it."

I know she’s right. I know it. It just rubs me the wrong way to hear it, to be making this decision right now when I have spent so long trying to avoid it. I know my kids have to grow up, that they need to start exploring the world. I just never thought it would happen so fast.

I bite back a sigh. "Fine." I grunt.

Kacee’s eyes snap up to me, her whole expression quickly transforming into shock. She seems to wear her emotions on her sleeve at all times. I wish she’d stop looking at me like she is right now.

“Are you sure?” Kacee asks, and I frown.

"I'm not sure," I say truthfully. "I said ‘fine' for their sakes, not yours. But this is temporary. Just as a trial run."

"Okay," Kacee agrees. I can see she's trying to hold back a smile and nearly succeeds at it. "Thank you so much for this opportunity. I swear I won't let you down. I think this is going to be really good for them."

"If you say so," I say. "What were your qualifications again?"

"She can send you her resume," Penelope interrupts, appearing behind Kacee so suddenly I nearly jump. I haven't been paying enough attention to anything outside of Kacee to see my sister approach. "For now though, I actually have to go back into the city, so—"

"What?" I demand, at the same time Kacee asks the same thing.

“No, no, it’s for work,” Penelope assures us both. “I can’t stay.”

“No!” Evie exclaims, jumping up off the sofa and running over. “You can’t stay for dinner? Daddy made corned beef.”

"As good as that sounds, I can't," Penelope says. "But I think Kacee can."

Every head turns to Kacee, including my own. Her whole face goes red under the scrutiny, but she nods.

"Well, if you're giving this live-in nanny thing a shot, I'll go grab her bag," Penelope says giddily, ignoring Kacee when she asks how she knows we've decided to give it a try. I stop myself from rolling my eyes.

"She does this," I say. Kacee looks up at me like she's surprised I'm speaking again. I wonder what she thinks of me exactly.

I clear my throat and turn away from her to look at Evie. "Now, I thought you liked corned beef."

“I do!” Evie exclaims. She grins up at me, then runs after Penelope, who is already coming back in with Kacee’s suitcase.

“Let me know if I can bring anything else up,” Penelope says, heading down the hallway to the guest room. “I’ll just leave this in the spare room. Once you work all the details out, maybe she can move up here long-term.”

“We’ll see,” Kacee says nervously, pointedly not looking at me. I’m not particularly chatty, but I think I can be a charismatic guy. Looking at Kacee’s reaction to me, I think I might be out of practice.

"Well, I really do have to go." Penelope looks at Kacee then makes eye contact with me. "You guys have a nice corned beef dinner. I'll see you tomorrow." She smiles wide as if this was her plan the whole time.

"Are you sure about this? If not, I can go with Penelope," Kacee asks pointedly. I'm horrible with chatting to people, but I thought I was a bit more personable. Perhaps not. Maybe she feels awkward being alone with me. I bring my expression back to neutral and look away. Penelope smiles at me, seeming almost a little smug, and I glance out the window instead.

“I’m sure,” I tell Kacee and look at Penelope who smiles approvingly.

"I'll be back tomorrow, I promise." She turns to Evie and Jackson with open arms. "Come on, kids, where're my goodbye hugs? Bring it in!"

Evie and Jackson sprint to hug Penelope tightly, then Jackson escorts her to the door while Evie stares at Kacee in the kitchen. I clear my throat, and Evie glances at me, apparently snapping out of her own thoughts.

"You're really pretty," Evie says to Kacee.

Kacee blinks, then smiles. "Thank you," she says. "That's a nice thing to say to someone."

“You’re welcome,” Evie replies politely. I’m happy at least one thing is going right. “Thank you for staying. I’ve always wanted another friend.”

Her words actually hurt my heart. Fuck.

“Let’s set the table and get washed up for dinner,” I announce, and Evie and Jackson run toward the bathroom to wash their hands and faces.

“Do you always eat before it’s dark?” Kacee asks. I raise an eyebrow at her when she looks up at me. “I’m just curious.”

“It’s a good time for kids to eat,” I say. Kacee looks like she’s actively trying not to say something. “We eat at the same time every day.”

"I'll get used to it," Kacee says before her face goes red and she turns away. I wonder if she would stay around long enough to actually get used to it or not. I'm leaning toward not, but I said I'd wait and see, and I will.

“What can I do to help?” she asks.

"Nothing," I say quickly. Her whole expression closes off.

“Oh,” she says. “Okay. Well—”

“You can watch the kids,” I add. She smiles a little, but she still isn’t looking at me. Whenever she does look at me, the look is heated. I wonder if she’s angry with me or just upset over the entire situation. I try to ignore her, but she’s staring at me, watching me. I turn and look at her.

"Once I'm done mashing these potatoes, I can walk you through their bedtime routine."

“Alright,” Kacee says. She steps hesitantly out of the kitchen. When I don’t say anything, she follows the sounds of Evie and Jackson washing their hands down the hall. While I mash the potatoes and whip them for dinner, they finish the game they set up earlier, which keeps them occupied while I work. It’s the first time in a long time I’ve made dinner without two small children constantly underfoot, tripping me.

“Dinner’s ready,” I call when I’m done, setting the last plate on the table. Jackson and Evie sprint over.

"Hey," Kacee exclaims before I even can. "Don't run. You don't want to trip and fall."

Evie and Jackson both laugh and slow down, and I glance at Kacee, genuinely considering she might actually be good at this.

"Since I don't have your resume yet, can you tell me what your qualifications are?" I ask as Kacee places potatoes onto Jackson's plate. Kacee's face goes red when she realizes I'm staring, but she focuses entirely on what she's doing while she answers.

"I got my bachelor's degree in early childhood education," Kacee explains, still with her head down, giving way too much attention to scooping mashed potatoes. "I'm certified in CPR and first aid, and I've got my basic skills assessment and a professional nanny certification. I've also taken certification classes in infant care, kid's nutrition, children's fitness, and positive discipline. I speak three languages, and I—"

“Which ones?” Evie asks.

"Don't interrupt," I scold. Kacee holds out a hand, and Evie passes her plate for potatoes.

"English, German, and Spanish," Kacee answers. "I spoke German a lot with the last family I nannied for."

"What happened to them?" Jackson asks with a mouth full of potatoes. I raise my brows at him, silently telling him to swallow his food before speaking.

"They moved back to Germany," Kacee tells them. "It was too far for me to go with them."

“Did they have kids, too?” Evie asks, after making sure to drink her water so I won’t glare at her, too.

"Three kids, around your age," Kacee answers. "Lauren, Emily, and Lucas. They loved to play hide-n-seek." She gives them a sweet smile and wink. I feel memorized watching her with my kids, which is a foreign feeling for me and I'm not sure how to process this all.

"They sound nice," Jackson says, before turning to his corned beef like a rabid animal. Kacee picks up his plastic child knife and hands it to him. He uses it to spear his beef and tear it with his teeth.

"We're working on his manners," Evie says like a little mother, watching her brother with thinly veiled disdain, and Kacee laughs. It's such a genuine, sweet laugh, I have to force myself not to smile in response.

Kacee continues to be charming at dinner, helping Jackson cut up his food while asking Evie to tell her about the new book she’s trying to read. I almost feel like a spectator watching my children warm up to this new person. After hearing her qualifications, it’s clear she knows what she’s doing. After seeing her with Evie and Jackson at dinner, it’s clear she’s passionate about her job.

Once everyone is finished eating, I stand and place the empty plates in the sink. "Alright, bedtime routine," I say with a smile. Evie and Jackson groan. "Yeah, yeah. Go brush and wash yourselves, then you can pick your books."

"Okay," they both happily reply, heading toward the bathroom. Kacee finishes washing and drying the last plate and sets it in the stack I've already made. I hold out my hand, and after a moment's hesitation, she places the dishtowel in it.

"They brush their teeth and wash their faces," I explain, folding up the dishtowel just for something to do with my hands. "Then they each pick out a book for me to read. Evie's been picking longer books though, so I just read a few chapters per night."

Kacee stares at me, then nods.

“What?” I ask. She shakes her head.

“No, it’s just—” She hesitates. “That’s the most words I’ve heard you say at once.”

As I stare at her and that’s when she realizes what she’s said. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”

"It's fine," I interrupt her before she can work herself up. She seems like she might be the type. "I'm not chatty. It's not personal." I toss the folded towel on the countertop and head for the bathroom, where there's suspicious silence. Sure enough, Evie and Jackson are hiding behind the shower curtain. I smile and yank the curtain back, hauling them both up in my arms. They come willingly, shrieking with laughter.

"Are you both clean?" I ask, and they assure me they are. "Put on your pajamas and pick your books, you little monsters."

"Put us down!" Jackson exclaims. I set them both on their feet, and they run toward their bedrooms. Kacee sticks her head around the corner as they run by.

“You can take one,” I offer. I consider it an olive branch in my own head, even a reluctant one.

“Sure,” Kacee agrees easily. “Which one?”

Neither, I think to myself, but I don’t dare say that. “Try Jackson. He’s on picture books still.” I also secretly want to see what’s going to happen in the next chapter of Evie’s book, but that’s neither here nor there. Kacee’s still staring at me, and I look down at myself and notice my shirt’s damp from the kids.

Kacee smiles before vanishing toward Jackson's room, and I head to Evie's. She falls asleep halfway through the next chapter. I kiss her forehead and whisper goodnight to her before shutting off her light before I close the door behind me. I stop in Jackson's room to find Kacee tucking the covers up around his chest.

“Out like a light,” Kacee whispers with a smile. I come around her and kiss Jackson’s head, tucking him in tighter trying to ignore Kacee’s eyes on me.

“He’s a heavy sleeper,” I tell her before leaving the room. Kacee follows, shutting the door softly behind us. “You know which one’s your room?”

"Penelope pointed it out," Kacee says, and I nod, glancing toward my own room.

“Well,” I say, wondering what else I should tell her and come up blank. “Goodnight.”

"Goodnight," she replies. We both stand to look at one another for a moment before I turn and head into my room. I hear her door click shut a few moments after mine does, and I sigh, finally exhaling. Kacee's presence has made me tense, and I find myself in bed, lying awake, thinking about her for just a little longer than I would've liked before I finally fall asleep.

I wake up around six in the morning, as always. I take a shower and get dressed then head to the kitchen to make breakfast. Also, like every morning, Evie follows me, rubbing her face as she yawns. She sits in the window seat in the kitchen and watches me make breakfast. I enjoy the time we spend together before the day kicks off.

"Is Kacee going to stay?" Evie asks into the silence, the only other sound is the bacon popping in the pan. I keep my eyes on the stovetop.

“Do you like her?” I ask. Evie makes a little humming sound.

"Yeah," she finally replies. "I'm really excited for a new friend. Betsy in my book has lots of friends." She places her hand against the window, then pulls it off, watching the mark it makes. "I want to have lots of friends, too. And Kacee's really nice."

"Yeah. She is." I turn my attention back to the bacon and try to suppress my feelings of guilt. I've never considered what I've been keeping Evie from experiencing, only that I'm helping her stay safe. Glancing at Evie again, I think I might let Kacee stay on longer. I would do anything for my kids, even if I'm not entirely sure I like it yet.

“Good morning,” Kacee says, being pulled into the kitchen by Jackson. “I heard we make breakfast together in the mornings.”

“If we all wake up on time,” I say, raising an eyebrow at Jackson, who giggles.

“I woke Kacee up for breakfast!” Jackson exclaims. I glance at Kacee, then back at Jackson.

“You shouldn’t wake people up, kid,” I tell him. “It’s rude.”

"But she would've missed it," Jackson says, emphatically. Kacee lets him lead her to a seat at the kitchen table.

“It’s really okay.” Kacee smiles. “I wouldn’t want to miss breakfast.”

"See?" Jackson says as if this proves his point. He takes the seat on Kacee's left, and Evie scrambles from the window to take the spot on Kacee's right before I can. I watch Evie and Jackson tell Kacee all about their plans for the day. Kacee listens and nods. She looks good even after being woken up at 6:30 in the morning by a five-year-old. Her hair is no longer in a braid, and she looks tired, but she seems genuinely happy to be here, almost glowing.

"You can stay," I say, almost surprising myself. I didn't intend to say that right away, and Kacee, Evie, and Jackson all look up at me at once. I slide the bacon onto a plate and bring it and the plate of eggs to the table.

"What I mean is, you can stay for a week. We'll work out lesson plans or whatever. All that stuff. In a week, we'll check in. See how it's going," I clarify.

"You already said we'd do a trial run," Kacee reminds me with a smirk. I nod and take my seat.

"Right, well, just clarifying." I hold back an embarrassed smile then look at the table filled with food. "Eat up, it's gonna be a long day."

Kacee serves the children first, then waits for me before helping herself. I keep my eyes on my plate and think how long this day is really going to be.