“Kink?” Lily’s voice rises in pitch. “We have a kinky dentist? Do you think he uses his tools to . . .” Her voice catches and I can almost see her mentally cataloguing Aiden Steadman’s office, from the vibrating toothbrushes to the rinse basin and from the drills to the dental forceps.

Although she claims to be a two-feet-on-the-ground kind of girl, Lily has always had a vivid imagination. Some of the best sex we ever had when we first got together involved role-play scenarios. We were strangers hooking up in an alley. A driver delivering a late night “package.” A musician encountering a crazy fan backstage. Anywhere, anytime, Lily was never afraid to take a risk. It’s what I miss most about her in the twelve months we’ve drifted apart.

“Red Cherry.” I read the fancy red script lettering. “Doesn’t sound like the kind of place you’d get dental supplies.”

“Maybe it isn’t dental supplies.” Lily is almost trembling with excitement. I haven’t seen her so animated in months. But that’s my fault. I’ve failed her as a husband, and I’ve failed her as man. If not for the dental appointment she made for me with Aiden six months ago, I don’t think our marriage would have lasted the year.

“Open it.” I pull off the lid, and we both peer inside. Although Aiden told me he was sending something over today, I am as curious as her to see what it is.

Hand shaking, Lily pushes aside the cloud of red tissue paper and feels around inside the box.

“Oh. My. God!” She holds up a pair of shiny handcuffs, partially covered in fuzzy red material and tied together with a red ribbon. “Chris! Look! Real, live, honest-to-goodness handcuffs.” Her eyes sparkle under the over head light. Lily has the most incredible eyes. Sometimes hazel, sometimes green, always beautiful. I noticed her eyes first the day we met at the bus stop. Mysterious eyes, a ridiculous amount of golden brown hair, and lips that looked like they’d been made to kiss. And those curves . . . Damn, my Lily was all woman.

With a gasp, she drops the handcuffs on the table and backs up against me as if they might bite.

“Jesus.” It’s not the handcuffs that tear the exclamation from my lips but the feeling of my wife pressed up against me after so damn long—the softness of her body, the warmth of her skin, and the trust she still has that I will protect her from harm.

Unable to stop myself, I wrap my arm around her waist and hold her tight. I can’t remember the last time we were so close that I could smell the delicate scent of flowers in her hair or feel the silky strands against my cheek. She fits perfectly against me, her head tucked under my chin and her sweet ass a delicious heat against my hips.

We stare at the handcuffs, united for the first time in over a year in speechless, mutual shock.

“Are you sure he said this was for us?” I pick up the handcuffs and make a show of running my fingers over the locking mechanism. I’ve always been curious about how things work, and although I’ve seen handcuffs before, I’ve never had a chance to check them out.

“Yes. He was very clear.”

“Did you tell him we were into that kind of stuff?”

She looks at me aghast. “No. Of course not. Did you?”

“We didn’t do much talking. He had his hands in my mouth.” At least he did when we first met. But after the checkup was done, we got to talking. He was looking for someone to do a custom-build in his basement—someone discreet. I’d already started thinking about taking on projects on the side. Business wasn’t going well for Mike and he’d started laying people off. Although he’d assured me I would always have a job with him because of Lily, I knew it was a strain. I offered to give Aiden a quote, never imagining it would lead to a pair of fuzzy handcuffs on my dining room table.

“These are real.” After snapping them closed, I untie the red ribbon and hold up the keys. “We could get into a lot of trouble with these.”

“Oh my.” Lily’s cheeks turn pink, and she licks her lips. My cock goes rock hard beneath my fly. My Lily is a beautiful woman, but when she’s aroused, she’s a goddess.

Although we were always adventurous in the bedroom, we never used anything like this. I loved what we had together and never felt the need for more. I assumed Lily felt the same. After I started my soul-destroying job at the accounting firm, trapped indoors twelve hours a day, what we had was the only thing that made sense. I wasn’t willing to risk trying something new, especially when the rest of my life was spinning out of control.

“What else is in the box?” She dips her head, but she can’t hide her reaction from me. I know Lily better than I know myself. I have felt her pain and loneliness over the last year. Countless nights I wanted to reach across the bed and pull her into my arms, but I haven’t felt worthy of her comfort, and I have nothing to give. If not for my failings, she wouldn’t have had to take a second job, we wouldn’t have had to remortgage the house, and we would have started the family we had always dreamed of having. Is it any wonder didn’t she like the gift I gave her for her birthday? Who wants a reminder of our past when there is little hope for our future?

“Have a look.”

She pushes the tissue aside and pulls out a lingerie set on a pink padded hanger.

I whistle long and low. “How am I going to get my teeth cleaned again when I know he’s into all this?” It’s not exactly a lie. I’ve known what Aiden is into since the day took me into his basement and outlined his plans for the BDSM dungeon he wanted me to build.

Disappointment flickers across her face. “Teeth cleaning is the last thing a man should be thinking about when looking at a white corset trimmed in red lace, a matching garter belt and panties, and a white hat with a red cross on it.” She studies the outfit and her lips quiver with a smile. “It’s a naughty nurse costume.”

It’s everything I can do not to strip off her clothes and dress her up myself. “Looks to be about the right size for you now.”

“You noticed I lost weight?” Her voice wavers and I feel like even more of a heel. After she started a second job working as a waitress at ReTox, Revival’s biggest bar, she joined a local gym to kill time between shifts. Between that, the extra hours of work, and just picking at her dinner every night, the extra pounds that had always been the bane of her existence melted away. I’d never seen those pounds on her. I loved her curves, but I did notice when she lost weight, and now I regret not saying anything about it.

“Of course I did. You’re my Lily.”

She lifts an eyebrow and gives me a cheeky smile. “Nurse Lily.”

I slide my hand over her hip and squeeze her ass. “Naughty Nurse Lily. I think we should get you dressed up and see how naughty you can be.”

Her eyes light up like it’s Christmas morning, and she grinds her hips against me. “I don’t think you’ve ever met a nurse as naughty as me.”

I slide my hands under her shirt, all my blood pooling in my groin when I imagine her wearing that outfit, her hands restrained with the cuffs . . .

Lily moans softly when I cup her breasts in my hands. “There are a few more things in the box. Maybe they’re part of the outfit. You wouldn’t want your naughty nurse to be unequipped for emergencies.”

“You seem very equipped to deal with the emergency I’ve got going on right now.” I rub my thumbs over her nipples until they peak beneath her bra.

“Down, boy.” She laughs and pulls my hands away. For a moment I feel like we are back to the way we were and the last year never happened.

“‘Down’ isn’t the problem I need you to treat.” I put her hand over my shaft and she squeezes me hard through my jeans.

“How about I rub it better while I find my . . .” She trails off when she pulls a bright red rabbit vibrator from the box. “Rabbit.” Her face flames and I chuckle. I can’t remember the last time I felt such lightness in my soul.

“I think you’d better call in sick tomorrow. You won’t be getting any sleep tonight.” I study the vibrator, secure in its cartoon rabbit packaging, and my mind races with the possibilities. The outfit. The handcuffs. The vibrator. My Lily on the bed coming so loudly she wakes the neighbors. We’ll definitely not make it to work on time.

“Promises, promises.” She opens the package and flicks the switch. The shaft twirls slowly in the air, and the rabbit’s ears vibrate back and forth.

“When you scream tonight, I want to hear my name.”

Lily turns the vibrator off and lays it on the table. “I’m not going to scream.”

“Sweetheart, when I get you on the bed in that sexy lingerie, your hands cuffed over your head, and that rabbit in my hand, you aren’t just going to scream my name; you’re going to beg me to make you scream it again.”

“Someone’s living in a fantasy world,” she teases, but I don’t miss the hitch in her breath or the tremor in her hand as she reaches into the box again.

“What is this?” She holds up a package containing a rubber ring with a bullet on top.

“Dunno.” I take it and read the label. “Vibrating cock ring.”

“It’s for you.”

“I don’t need any help to pleasure my girl.”

Lily’s head jerks up and it takes me a moment to realize it is the last two words that have made her eyes glitter.

My girl. I haven’t called her that in forever, but I feel the words in my heart. She will always be my girl. My Lily.

“There’s one more thing.” She pulls out a long white coat and a stethoscope. “They must go with the nurse costume. I guess it’s a role-play thing. Try it on.”

I pull my T-shirt over my head and Lily makes a choking noise.

“You okay?” I toss the shirt over a chair.

“I haven’t seen you without your shirt for a long time. You’re always gone in the morning when I get up, and you change while I’m making dinner. You look . . . good.”

I am definitely more fit. A few months after I started working with Mike, I realized my love handles were gone, my shoulders were less rounded, and I was sporting a six-pack between the deep V cuts leading below my belt. Physical labor suits me better than a professional job, but I can’t shake the feeling that it brands me a failure. If carpentry is my calling, why did I spend four years in college? All that potential gone to waste, my mother said when I told her I was working with Mike. We haven’t spoken since.

“How do I look?” I pull on the lab coat and stethoscope and pose beside the chair.

“Very sexy. Go take a look.”

My stomach knots as I stare at myself in the mirror, seeing the loss of yet another dream.

Lily’s brow wrinkles in a frown. “What’s wrong?”

“I never told you this, but my mother wanted me to be a doctor.” I watch her in the mirror as I talk, unable for some reason to turn around. “She made me stop helping out at my dad’s construction company so I could study for med school. She was devastated when I didn’t get in, and very angry when I told her there was no point trying again. I wasn’t smart enough. I went to college to study business instead so I could help my dad. He was good with his hands, not so good with the money. She never forgave me for giving up. When my dad passed away, she sold his business without telling me. I guess it was her way of making sure I didn’t wind up like him. Or maybe it was just spite.”

“Baby . . . ” Lily’s hands fist by her sides. She and my mother never got along, likely because they are total opposites. Where Lily is warm, kind, tolerant, and understanding, my mother is vain, selfish, narrow-minded, and opinionated. She refused to attend our wedding because she didn’t think Lily was good enough for me. She said I had failed her yet again by marrying a woman without any money, society connections, or even a college degree.

“You have a college degree. You were a successful accountant. It wasn’t your fault the company downsized.” Her eyes flash fire. “Now, you’re doing something that you enjoy, building beautiful things just like your dad. You have his gift. Mike wouldn’t have offered you a job if he didn’t think you had talent.”

Damn. This coat . . . Thinking of my mother . . . The humiliation of having to admit I couldn’t provide for my wife . . . Asking Mike for a job because we’d run through our savings and couldn’t pay the mortgage . . . It hits me all at once.

Yanked out of the fantasy, I tear off the coat and stethoscope and throw them on the floor. “Your brother had to give me a fucking job because I couldn’t support you. What kind of man has to rely on handouts? My mother was right. I failed her. I failed you. I’m almost glad my dad isn’t alive to see me now.”

I expect her to shut down as she has time and again over the last year, but something is different tonight. Something changed when we opened that box. Lily folds her arms and glares at me. “I’ve never once felt like you let me down, and I’ve never thought of you as less of a man because of something that isn’t your fault. Your dad would have been proud of you no matter what you did. Your mother has messed you up almost as badly as my dad messed me up, but she was right about one thing. Accounting wasn’t your calling. You’re happy working with your hands. You just can’t accept it.”

“You don’t understand anything.” I pull on my T-shirt, regretting my decision to let Aiden get involved. “Pack that stuff up and give it back to Aiden. We’re never going to use it.”

I slipped up with the name—he has only ever been Dr. Steadman to us—but Lily doesn’t seem to notice. Her face falls, and I regret taking her down this road to nowhere. Feeling hope and then losing it all again is the worst kind of pain.