Stevie sat in a quiet corner of the bar while she waited for the rest of Court’n Jacks to arrive. It was their fifth live show in a long line of lead up shows to build their fan base before they hit the road with Lily Ames’ tour.

She sipped her drink and allowed herself a moment just to enjoy the ride they were on. Their single, although not number one, was in the top twenty and was garnering a lot of air time and their shows were becoming popular as well. The thrill of performing was one that she had missed, even if she hadn’t realized she’d missed it until now. There was an energy that you just couldn’t get in a studio and it fed her soul. She was brimming with new ideas for songs constantly and there was a pleasant feeling of contentment that permeated her. Stevie was happy.

Although, that feeling of contentment could be due to the fact that she was getting regular, stunning and ultimately satisfying orgasms.

The other band members had picked up on her and Nate’s affair but had been kind enough not to mention it and she and Nate didn’t rub their faces in it either. When they were working, they keep a professional distance, not that they were working together much anymore.

‘No Good for Me’ was finished and the release was imminent, so there wasn’t much for them to do together until then. After the song was released they were slated to do a few performances together, a couple of which would be while they were on tour. Lily hadn’t minded a bit of cross-promotion and was doing a song with Nate herself. With Nate deciding to sign with Derek’s new label and Court’n Jacks and Lily Ames already signed to him, it was all about keeping it in the family. The fact that his album would be released by Rocksteady was inconsequential. Everybody involved knew that he was only still with them because they had demanded one more album and that he no longer had any loyalty towards them.

The only dull spot in her otherwise shiny life was that she missed Darla. Tom, Darla, and the babies had gone home to finalize things before the big move to Nashville and she missed seeing her bestie every day. Nate had done his best to keep her occupied, but sometimes a girl just needed her girlfriend to talk about stuff - about boys. She still had Nadine and Vanessa, but it wasn’t quite the same. Darla had known her forever and there were just things that they knew about each other that it was too hard to explain to someone who hadn’t known her as long. And she was worried about Darla’s post-partum depression. Darla had agreed to see her doctor back home but it didn’t stop Stevie from worrying about her.

“Stevie?”

She looked up and into the intense blue eyes of Carson. Senator Giles. She smiled and stood from the table, hugging him.

“Carson, what are you doing here?”

“We were in town and someone suggested we come and see this hot new band,” he said, his eyes crinkling in the corners as he smiled. “How could I turn down the opportunity to see you again?”

“How’s the new job?” she asked as they sat down and he ordered a drink from the waitress that approached them.

“Good,” he said. “Tiring.”

“The people love you,” she said, bumping her knee into his. “Especially all those society wives.”

He blushed and looked down at his hands. It was no secret that the majority of his supporter base were women. His dark hair, chiseled good looks and those amazing eyes had all the women swooning. He was a far cry from the usual overweight, grey haired and grumpy looking politicians that had come before him.

“About that,” he said and then stopped as the waitress delivered his drink. He waited until she walked away before speaking again. “Are you seeing anyone?”

It was the first time she’d been asked the question since she and Nate had begun hooking up and she wasn’t really sure how to respond. She and Nate had agreed on exclusivity but they’d also agreed to keep this quiet.

“It’s complicated,” she replied with a shrug and then sipped her drink.

He sighed and pierced her with his intense blue gaze. “I made a mistake,” he eventually said, his voice quiet so that she had to lean forward to hear him. “I should never had demanded that you give up your career for me. I miss you Stevie, I miss what we had together.”

Stevie sat back in her chair, stunned. Their relationship had been fun and comfortable and she loved Carson, but could they really be a couple? He was a senator now and with that came certain expectations. She would need to be available to attend dinners and events with him, what would that mean for her career? For going on tour?

And what about Nate? They had only agreed to a short fling while they were working together, there had never been talk of anything serious. Technically, their fling should be over as they were no longer working together, but neither of them had made any move to call the whole thing off. If anything, things seemed to be progressing past the fling stage and into something that could actually be called a relationship.

“Carson, I—”

“It’s okay,” he said with a self-deprecating smile. “I know I shouldn’t be dumping this on you right now, it’s just that seeing you again…” He shook his head, his eyes on his fingers as he held his glass. “It made me remember what it was like between us.” He looked up at her. “Do you think there could ever be anything between us again?”

“Carson—”

“Carson Giles,” Nate said walking up to him and slapping him on the back. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Carson stood to shake Nate’s hand and Stevie saw the glint of steel in Nate’s eye. He wasn’t happy to have found them together, which pissed Stevie off. What right did he have to come over all possessive? He was being a dick.

“Nate Nash,” Carson said with his politician smile, “I’ve been hearing good things about your new album.”

“Thanks, man,” Nate said, taking a seat on the other side of Stevie and lifting his hand to signal a waitress. “Are you here to see Stevie?”

“My team and I were in town and we had a free night,” Carson shrugged nonchalantly. “I heard Stevie and her band were playing so I thought I’d check them out.”

“Court’n Jacks are incredible,” Nate said, slinging an arm casually over the back of Stevie’s chair. “I’ve been working close with them over the last few weeks.”

“That so?” Carson looked between her and Nate and Stevie felt her cheeks redden. “Are you two singing together again?”

“Just one song,” Stevie said, pushing her chair back from the table, knocking Nate’s arm free before standing. “I should go and check on the others.”

She walked away feeling both pairs of eyes burning into her back. Nate was so out of line and she was so pissed at him that if she didn’t get out of his space she would have said something she’d regret. Instead she headed for the back door and gulped down the cool night air, despite the eau de dumpster.

What really pissed her off, and the one thing she couldn’t deny, especially to herself, was that having Nate claim her like he did made her feel good. She wanted him to proclaim that she was his, she’d wanted that for so long that she almost felt giddy with it. What wasn’t so impressive was that he’d only done it because he felt threatened by Carson. The two of them had had a rivalry that dated back to an unfortunate incident involving a cheerleader in high school. It just wasn’t the same when she knew that it was more about that than about her.

“So you and Stevie, huh?” Carson sipped his drink, his eyes never leaving Nate’s.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business,” Nate replied.

“She was my fiancée,” he said with a casual shrug.

“Still doesn’t give you the right to know her private life now.”

Nate hated that Carson had been with Stevie. He hated anyone that came before him.

“I always thought the two of you had something going back in high school and I could never understand why she put up with you screwing around on her. Imagine my surprise when I found out that the two of you had only ever been friends. Finally crawl your way out of the friend-zone Nash?”

Nate clenched his fists under the table. He knew the guy was fucking with him and that he was just trying to push Nate’s buttons to get a rise out of him, but the green haze of jealousy that had descended over his eyes when he’d seen the two of them together was stealing his rational brain functions.

They had been friends once, before that cheerleader had pitted them against each other in a quest to win her affections. It had ignited a competition between them that had spanned the rest of their school years and then some. But that’s not what this was, was it? Nate hadn’t just gotten all possessive over Stevie because it was Carson, had he?

“Senator?” one of Carson’s aides approached the table and interrupted their staring contest.

Carson stood. “Good to see you again Nash,” he said, throwing some bills on the table. “Maybe we’ll be seeing more of each other after tonight.”

It was cheap shot and Nate knew it, but it didn’t stop him from feeling like punching the smug bastard. Nate felt suddenly insecure in his relationship with Stevie and he didn’t like it, not at all. They hadn’t made promises to each other, but they had managed to slip into each other’s lives seamlessly, even now that they weren’t working together. Admittedly they didn’t do anything much outside the bedroom. It wasn’t like they went on dates or publicly declared their relationship…and maybe that was the problem.

Nate sighed as he downed his beer. Did he want to have a real, public relationship with Stevie? The last real relationship he’d had was with Natasha and that hadn’t turned out so well for him. But Stevie wasn’t Natasha and it had been her idea to keep it a secret anyway.

And what the hell did that mean? Weren’t the women the ones that wanted to stake their claim on the man? Weren’t they the ones that usually wanted things out in the open and to go on dates and shit? Was he just Stevie’s dirty little secret, a fuck-buddy to scratch an itch?

He was driving himself crazy with his own self-talk. Everything had been fine between them until Carson had turned up and stirred the pot. Now he was second guessing everything that had been happening between the two of them. The real question was, what did he want?

“Hey Nate,” Vanessa said, slipping into a chair beside him, “why the frown?”

“Nothin’,” he said with a sigh. “Just thinking.”

“Was that Senator Giles you were talking to earlier?” she asked looking over her shoulder to where Carson was now sitting with his cronies.

“Yeah,” he said.

“That man is so good-looking,” she said dreamily and Nate scowled. “You know he and Stevie were engaged once.”

“Yeah, I know,” Nate said. “We all went to school together.”

“Oh wow,” she said, still looking over at his table.

“Who’re y’all looking at?” Nadine asked as she sat down.

“That senator that Stevie was engaged to,” Vanessa replied.

“That man is fine,” Nadine said, craning her neck to catch a glimpse of him. “I don’t know why Stevie let him go.”

“What am I?” Nate asked. “Chopped liver?”

Vanessa patted his hand, “Now, now, Nate, don’t go gettin’ your knickers in a twist. There’s enough female adoration to go around.”

“He doesn’t need any more,” Jace said. “His head is big enough as it is. Come on, time to go play some songs.”

The sisters got up from the table and followed Jace to the stage where Stevie was waiting for them. She avoided his eye and he knew by the stubborn set of her mouth that he had done something to piss her off. The whole secret relationship thing was a crock. He didn’t want to have to hide that they were sleeping together, he wanted everyone to know that she belonged to him.

But did she? Was she really his or was he just a check mark on her bucket list?

Fuck.

He shook his head. This was insane. They needed to talk. They needed to sort this out so that they were on the same page. He knew what he wanted, now he just had to hope that she felt the same.

The set went great, but Stevie just wasn’t feeling it. Nobody noticed, well, nobody in the audience noticed that she wasn’t performing up to her usual standard, but the rest of the band did and they bailed her up as soon as they’d cleared the stage and made it to the green room backstage.

“What the hell, Stevie?” Jace asked.

“I just wasn’t feeling it tonight,” she said, not able to look him in the face.

“Does it have anything to do with the frown that was on Nate’s face earlier?” Nadine asked.

“Or the way the senator was staring at you like a starving man at a buffet?” Vanessa added.

“This is why interpersonal relationships in bands are a bad thing,” Jace said.

“Interpersonal relationships? Seriously Jace? They’re sleeping together not meeting to negotiate world peace,” Nadine said.

“Look, I was just a bit off tonight, that’s all. I’m tired—”

“And we can guess at the reasons you’re so tired,” Vanessa said with a wink.

“Right, that’s my limit, I’m going out to the bar to get a drink.”

Jace left the room, slamming the door behind him.

“Are you screwing them both?” Nadine asked.

“What! No, of course not. I haven’t seen Carson in months—”

“Mm-hm,” Vanessa said, crossing her arms and sticking her hip out. “So why was he here tonight and why did Nate look like he wanted to string him up by his toenails?”

“It’s nothing,” Stevie said, slipping her guitar into its case. “He was in town and someone told him we were playing—”

“He couldn’t take his eyes off you all night,” Nadine said. “Are you sure that’s all it was?”

“He may have said he made a mistake letting me go—” Stevie dropped to a chair and hid her face in her hands, “and then Nate went all caveman. God, when did things get so complicated? We were just supposed to be having some fun together, it was never meant to get serious.”

“Is that all you want?” Vanessa asked pulling up a chair to sit beside her. “Just something casual?”

“There’s just so much going on in our lives right now,” she said. “I don’t have the time or energy to put into a relationship. We leave on tour soon and what is that going to look like? How can I possibly be involved with someone while we spend three months traveling all over the country?”

“Are you sure Nate wants more? Maybe he was just marking his territory like a dog.” Vanessa rubbed her back soothingly.

“You see, that pisses me off too. I’m not some prize in a pissing contest. The two of them have competed over girls since senior year. That is not something I want to get in the middle of.”

“But you don’t want Carson back, do you?” Nadine asked.

“No…I don’t know. Geez. I love Carson, but I’m not in love with him. But then does that even matter? I know we’d have a good life together—”

“But you wouldn’t be able to tour and Court’n Jacks wouldn’t happen.” Nadine and Vanessa shared a look.

“No, he said he was wrong to ask me to give it up.”

“What does that mean?” Vanessa asked. “Does that mean he wants you back regardless of you being in the band?”

“I don’t know,” Stevie said with a shrug.

“What about Nate?” Nadine asked. “You two have been practically inseparable.”

“Yeah, in the bedroom. But we never go out together and he isn’t offering me anything.”

“But that was your idea wasn’t it?” Vanessa asked. “To keep it a secret?”

Stevie exhaled. “Yeah, it was.”

“Come on,” Nadine said, “we’re not going to solve this problem by sitting in here talking about it. We need alcohol and possibly ice-cream.”

Vanessa pulled the door open and Nate was standing there, his hand raised to knock.

“Hey,” he said, his eyes on her.

“Hey,” she replied.

Vanessa and Nadine left the room and Nate walked in, closing it behind him.

“I’m sorry about before—”

“I’m sorry for storming—”

They both spoke at the same time before stopping and smiling at each other. There was an awkwardness between them that had never been there before and Stevie didn’t like it.

“You go first,” Nate said.

“I’m sorry for storming off,” she said.

“And I’m sorry for being an asshole,” he said. “It’s just that he—”

“See, that’s the problem,” Stevie said, jumping in, “I don’t know if you were jealous because of Carson or because of me?”

He took a step forward and pulled her into his arms. She went willingly, needing the security of being wrapped up in him.

“Stevie,” he said, softly, “I know you had a relationship with him in the past and that kills me, but tonight? That was all you, baby. Seeing him sitting with you? Seeing any guy sitting with you? It drives me insane. I want people to know we’re together, I want the world to know.”

The world? God, did she want that? They would be followed by paparazzi wherever they went and there would be all sorts of speculations in the media about whether they were splitting up or if he was cheating on her or if she was pregnant. Did she want to go through that? Just thinking about it was exhausting and she had so much on her plate as it was.

But if they didn’t take it to the next level, where did that leave them?

“Soon,” she said, resting her forehead against his chest. “There’s just so much to do before the tour that I don’t think I could cope with the media storm that would unleash on us if we went public right now.”

He sighed and placed a kiss on her head. “Okay,” he said, “but I reserve the right to be jealous if I see another guy making moves on you.”

She snaked her arms around his waist and squeezed. “Same goes for you, buddy,” she said lifting her head.

He dropped his lips to hers in a tender kiss and the uncertainty that had been plaguing her melted away.