Under the potted plant, my parents still hide the key to their house. I slide it into the lock, turn and press down on the trigger to open the door. The smell of freshly baked cookies, cinnamon and the overall feeling of warmth washes over me. I close my eyes and inhale deeply, letting the stress of Hollywood leave me. It’s good to be home.

I set my bags down in the entryway and take in the decorations. Garland and white lights wrap the staircase, with red bows scattered throughout. I’m eager to see our Christmas tree. When my parents had our family room remodeled, it became one of my favorites of the house, especially during the holidays. My mom always took decorating to a whole new level.

When I step into the kitchen, I’m surprised to find my mother… well, the backside of my mom because she’s bent over with her head in the oven. I hadn’t thought she’d be here, and the now fresh cookies I smelled when I walked in make sense. I wait until she pulls herself out before I alert her to my presence. She sits back on her heels, with black gunk all over her gloved hands.

“Hey, Mom.”

“Delaney!” she screeches. She stands and walks toward me. I want to hug her, but the thought of getting dirty doesn’t sit well with me. “Let me clean up. I wasn’t expecting you for another hour or so.”

“I thought I texted you my flight times.” On the counter the cookies are calling my name. I grab one and bite into it. It’s still warm, making the chocolate gooey. “So good,” I mumble in between bites.

“You did, but I still get confused on the time zones. Now give me some sugar,” she says once her hands are clean. I stuff the rest of the cookie into my mouth before falling into her arms. Unsuspectingly, tears start to fall as I bury my face in my mom’s shoulder. I shouldn’t cry over Trey, but I can’t help the ache I feel in my heart. For a brief moment, I thought he was the one. I never thought he was having an affair or suspected him of being the type of man to do so. Now I wonder if I was his side-chick or a publicity stunt. I have a feeling it’s the latter. It’s a known fact in the industry that some people use others to advance their careers.

My mom continues to hold me, much like she’s done time and time again, through the bumps and bruises, and other heartaches I’ve experienced over the years. I know it was only six months, but still. Knowing I didn’t mean anything to him hurts.

I’m the first one to pull away. Mom runs her hands up and down my shoulders and offers me a soft smile. “You gonna be okay?” she asks.

I nod. “I am. I’m shocked and mad that I didn’t know or figure it out. Even thinking about him now, and his actions… I don’t know. I didn’t see him like this.” I shrug and go back to the cookies. My mom hands me a plate, which I pile them on to. I go to the kitchen table and stare out the back window. “How come you don’t have a tree yet?”

“Your dad has been busy and with neither you nor Dom living at home, it’s hard to get into the spirit sometimes.”

There’s a deer traipsing through my parents’ backyard, her hooves leaving indents in the snow. I watch as she heads to a bale of hay that my dad makes sure the animals have to eat during the winter.

“I’ve missed this,” I say, motioning toward the yard. “Everything in Los Angeles is concrete. Sure, we have parks, but the houses and buildings are on top of each other. There’s no space. No freedom.”

“Are you talking about freedom from the press?” Mom asks from behind me. I turn to see her setting a glass of milk down onto the table. I smile and pull the chair out so I can sit down.

“Simplicity. The ability to breathe. I don’t know. I can’t explain it. As soon as I stepped outside, I felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulder. And yeah, the lack of paparazzi is a plus.”

“Do they bother you much?”

I shrug and pick up another cookie, dunking it into my milk. “They do and don’t. Obviously now, I’m a headline. The scorned girlfriend or the blind one who didn’t know her boyfriend was cheating on her.” I take another bite and chew.

“And now you’re home, you’re local news.”

I look at her oddly. “What are you talking about?”

My mom smiles and starts laughing. “You were pulled over by Aiden Fisher for speeding.”

“How do you even know that?”

She shrugs, as if it’s no big deal. “Everyone knows.”

I roll my eyes and shake my head. “Town gossip. I’m surprised you don’t have a blog yet to keep everyone updated. You know you could probably do text alerts or something, save everyone time from playing telephone.”

Mom laughs, but it’s the truth. Astrid Du Luca is worse than the National Enquirer. “How was it seeing Aiden?”

“Fine. Why?”

“He’s had a rough go of it lately.”

“His wife has cancer, right?” I ask.

Mom shakes her head. “Had cancer, she died. Let’s see, I think it’s been a year and half now, maybe even two years. All I know is he’s been struggling financially since Heather died. His insurance only covered so much of her medical expenses.”

“That’s so sad. They have a son, right?”

“Daughter. Holly, she’s seven. He’s such a good dad.”

Aiden Fisher and I dated in high school. It was a few months, but my brother teased us so relentlessly that we decided to end it. They were friends and apparently, Dominic thought we were crossing some imaginary line. It was after I left for Hollywood, that he started dating Heather.

Mom’s words weigh heavily on me. I can’t imagine loving someone so much you devote your life to them, only to have them die, and at such a young age too. Maybe it’s a good thing Trey did this to me before I was fully invested and ended up with a broken heart.

“What are you thinking about?”

I shake my head. “Nothing, really.”

“I remember when you dated Aiden. Your dad and I thought for sure you would’ve married him.”

My eyes meet hers, and she shrugs. “Why do you say that?”

“It was the way he looked at you, even before you both decided to start dating.”

I try to think back to high school. I knew I wanted to move to Hollywood and act. It was my passion from the time I started in local theater. Everyone knew once I graduated, I was gone. My parents hated the idea. I promised them that if after one year I hadn’t landed a major role, I’d come home. It took me six months, and I haven’t looked back since. Picturing Fish when we dated is hard. It’s been so long since I’ve thought about him. It’s not like he’s the one that got away or anything. We were friends because of my brother. We dated and ended it amicably, and stayed friends, although we didn’t stay in touch with each other. The only one I really spoke to after leaving, aside from my family, is Mindy.

“I guess I don’t remember.”

“It was a long time ago.”

It was, but it wasn’t. Ten years isn’t really that long ago. I should be able to recall how Aiden looked at me, but I guess I was lost in my own little world. “I think I’m going to go get settled.”

I leave my mom in the kitchen and head back to the foyer to pick up my bags. It’s been years since I’ve been in the cold weather and will need to go shopping. I’m hoping some of my old sweaters are still in my closet. Family photos cover the hallway walls. Climbing the steps, I stop at our most recent family photo, taken on the red carpet. My dad and Dominic are in tuxedos, while my mom and I are dressed in full-length gowns.

Stepping into my room is like walking through a time warp. Nothing has changed. Including my twin sized bed or my dollhouse style bookshelves. The same bluish / greenish dresser with a mirror is there, in the same spot, I left it. It’s funny I never upgraded my bed when I was in high school. I honestly think it was my father’s way of keeping the boys out of my room.

I stand in my front of my bookcases, looking at everything I’ve collected over the years. They used to be my favorite things in my room and as I look around now, I think they still are. My room isn’t large by any means, so my father tried to utilize the space best he could by giving me a place to, at first, store toys, which turned into trophies, photos and yearbooks.

Four books stand out the most to me. Maybe it’s because Mom and I were just talking about high school or maybe I’m feeling a bit nostalgic because I’m home. I pull out the one for my senior year and open it. The page is full of short stories, random phone numbers and well wishes from my classmates. They all promised to go watch my first movie, making me wonder if they did.

My eyes land on Aiden’s name. His handwriting was always so nice compared to other guys in our class.

Laney,

Our time was short, but sweet. I will miss your laugh, the way you tilt your head when you’re thinking too hard, and the way you smile when you see me. Love, Fish

My fingers run over the page, feeling the indent from his words. I’ve never wondered what it would’ve been like if I stayed in Ramona Falls or if I had gone away to college, and come home during breaks and summer vacations. What if Dom hadn’t been so crass about the relationship between Fish and I, would we have dated longer? Many of my classmates married their high school sweethearts. Some stayed here and started raising families, while others moved. What would my life be like if I hadn’t followed my dream of becoming an actress?

Closing the book, I set it down on my bed and head to the cabinet, which is part of my dresser. I pull the door open and drop to my knees. My mom must’ve taken the liberty of preserving my favorite sweaters because they’re all in there, sealed tightly in those plastic vacuum bags you see late night infomercials for.

I stay up in my room, unpacking. Every so often, my mom comes up to chat, telling me about the latest gossip. That’s the thing about Ramona Falls, gossip changes here like a clock changes time. Nothing gets past my mother, which is probably another reasons why I never dated seriously in high school. I can’t even imagine how I’d feel if someone told my mom they caught me making out behind the shed at the lake. It’d be so embarrassing. It’s ironic that I moved away from here to Hollywood, which is an even bigger place for juicy details. It seems I need the gossip to survive.

When I was little, I used to wait for my dad to come home from work by sitting on my knees on my mother’s “do not touch” couch with my stomach pressed to the back, trying to get as close to the window as possible. I’d wait until his car pulled into the driveway, then I’d rush to the door, eager to give him a hug. I remember he smelled like oil from working at the factory. I used to love that smell.

It wasn’t until I was in high school when he ran for mayor and won. Honestly, no one expected him to win because he lacked experience, but the margin of victory was a landslide and we went from a blue-collar family to what I call a dingy-white collar family. My mom still works at the bank. My brother’s a police officer. While I may be an actress, I’ve never forgotten my roots.

And that is why I’m sitting on my mother’s sofa, with my chin resting on my hands, watching and waiting for the headlights of my dad’s car to appear so I can run to the door and wrap my arms around his shoulders.