Chapter 7
“Soooo, you and Hudson disappeared awfully fast from the movie last night,” Sam observed.
And then I promptly lost my shit. But Audrey wasn’t about to talk about that. The more mental distance she could put between herself and last night’s flashback, the better. “It’s not what you think. We just decided to do a kitchen raid since I slept through dinner. The movie was shitty anyway.”
“You should’ve come and joined us for poker in the boathouse,” Charlie said.
“Next time.”
Sam narrowed her eyes. “You okay? You seem a little peaked this morning.”
“Fine. Just tired. Didn’t sleep well. There’s a reason our moms wouldn’t let us have giant ice cream sundaes for dinner right before bed.” Right. Let’s blame it on the sugar.
“If ice cream is the only thing you topped with whipped cream last night, then you and Hud need lessons in how this whole fling thing is supposed to work,” Charlie announced.
“We’re not having a fling.” And after last night, the likelihood that they ever would seemed minuscule. Was she doomed to always show her absolute worst to this man?
“That’s a damned shame. You two throw off sparks every time you get within ten feet of each other,” Sam observed.
Yeah. Yeah it was. Tired of the discussion, Audrey drained the last of her coffee and shoved back from the table. “Well, at the risk of encouraging your romantic delusions, I’m bidding you both good day. I’m meeting Hudson at the zipline this morning.”
“Oooo,” they chorused.
Audrey rolled her eyes, hearing a faint sing-song of “Audrey and Hudson sitting in a tree…” as she pushed out of the dining hall. She couldn’t decide if she was annoyed or amused.
He was waiting at the head of the zipline trail, dressed in cargo shorts and a navy SFD t-shirt. The stretch of cotton across his broad shoulders had her mouth watering. Just the sight of him had last night’s horror fading.
His lips quirked in a half-smile as he saw her. “Morning.”
That voice. Dear God. There was an extra layer of growl to the rumble this morning, and added to the stubble darkening his jaw, she couldn’t help but think about what it’d be like to hear that voice in bed, maybe with that stubble rubbing against more sensitive parts.
Audrey slammed the door on that thought and sucked in an unnecessarily large lungful of crisp, morning air. “Hi.” Brilliant conversationalist, Graham. How dare he not throw himself directly at your feet?
“You ready for this?”
For just a moment, she forgot what she was here for. Was she ready to say to hell with caution and pursue him? Her brain said hell no. Her lady parts were screaming, “Move over sister!” Then she remembered. Ziplining. They were here to go flying through trees together.
“As I’ll ever be.” Even she didn’t know which question she was answering.
“Scared?”
Terrified. “Maybe a little nervous.”
He smiled like he knew she was lying and gestured to the trail. “After you.”
A part of her wanted to slip her hand into his, like a giddy teenager on a first date. Instead she started walking.
He fell into step beside her. “Nothing to worry about. You’ll be strapped into a safety harness the whole time. You don’t even have to hold on.”
Oh, but she wanted to hold on. To him.
What is the matter with me? She’d never in her life had a conversation where everything sounded like a double-entendre. Never had a conversation where she couldn’t keep her mind off sex. She’d had sex and hadn’t been all that impressed with it, so the lack of it since the accident hadn’t even really registered. Not until now.
He’s an excellent specimen of a man. Big. Muscular. Virile. And you’ve got a little hero worship going on. Why wouldn’t you? He’s done nothing but repeatedly rescue you since you met. You’re just a slave to biology. That’s all. It means you’re a healthy, adult female. That should be a comfort.
It wasn’t.
“Audrey?”
She realized they’d stopped at a little gear hut, and Hudson had been talking to her. “Hmm?”
“You okay?”
“Woolgathering. I’m sorry. You were saying?”
He held out a bright red helmet. “Try this one on for size.”
She put it on. With expert fingers, he checked the fit, snapping and adjusting straps until the thing fit properly. “You do this a lot?”
“Ziplining, no. But rock climbing, yes. And search and rescue training. A lot of the equipment is very similar. Here, let’s get you harnessed up.” He accepted a harness from the girl manning the hut and bent low, holding it out so Audrey could step into it. “Just put your legs through here.”
She balanced on his shoulder and put one foot through, then the other, proud she didn’t wobble. She’d done extra stretches this morning to make sure she was as limber as possible. As thrilling as his rescue had been the other night, the realities of her continued limitations and klutziness made her paranoid about the necessity for a repeat. “I thought you were part of a city fire department.”
“I am. But I’m certified for search and rescue. Sometimes I get called out for work elsewhere.” He pulled the harness up to her hips and started adjusting those straps.
Audrey tried not to think too much about the proximity of his hands as they tightened and tugged, jerking her hips around a bit as he worked.
“All set. You wanna check my work?”
The staff woman nodded and looked Audrey over while Hudson put on his own harness and helmet. “Just right. Both of you.”
They followed her over to a wooden platform. At the ladder, Audrey tipped her head back and looked up and up. She hadn’t counted on a ladder.
“You go up first,” Hudson said. “I’ll be right behind you. If you slip, I’ll be right there to catch you.”
Audrey appreciated that he could say that without sounding patronizing. She blew out a breath. “Okay. Up we go.”
The staff woman went first, clambering up with the agility of a monkey. Audrey ignored that, and put one foot on the ladder.
Hudson was right at her shoulder, close enough that if she leaned back, just an inch or two, she’d be touching him. “Just take your time. I’m right here.” He gripped the ladder on either side of her. But instead of making her feel crowded, it made her feel safe.
She began to climb. It took an embarrassingly long time, but she didn’t slip, didn’t have any trouble with her footing. And if she enjoyed the periodic brush of Hudson’s body against hers as he climbed up almost directly behind her, who could blame her for that?
The staff woman helped her up onto the platform and immediately snapped the safety line onto the rigging above their heads. Even so, Audrey scooted to the massive post in the center and wrapped her arms around it. “Holy crap, this is high.”
Hudson leapt lightly onto the platform behind her. “You got a heights thing?”
“It’s never come up before.” Why would it? She’d never been outdoorsy and the highest she’d been was at mountain overlooks or skyscrapers, behind nice, solid safety railings and windows.
“You’re gonna be just fine. Bridget here has you all tied in.”
“Can you maybe go first?” There was only a little bit of squeak to her voice.
“Sure can.”
Bridget attached him to the zipline.
“Now here’s how this works. You’re going to step off the edge here.”
Audrey’s stomach dipped as she glanced toward the ground far below, then quickly pulled her gaze back up.
“Look at me. Just at me,” Hudson ordered.
Audrey did as he asked, focusing on those calm, dark gray eyes, and felt herself settle.
“You’ll feel just a little dip as the line takes your weight. Then you’re just gonna slide down. You might twist a bit in the wind, depending on your balance. But you won’t fall, and you won’t hit anything. They keep all this ruthlessly maintained. At the other end, there will be a ramp angling up to the top of the next platform. You’ll slow down as you get there and hit the ramp running, then slow your own momentum from there. The center pole the line is attached to will be wrapped in padding if you don’t slow down fast enough, and I’ll be right there waiting. Okay?”
It was the same soothing tone he’d used on her at the accident site. Telling her everything would be okay. And it had been. This was nothing compared to that.
“Okay. See you on the other side.”
He flashed a grin at her in an unexpectedly boyish burst of excitement. “I’ll be waiting.” Then he stepped off the platform, backward.
His whoop echoed through the trees as the zipper thing carried him away from her. Before he left her sight, she saw him swing his legs up, wrapping them around the center line so he was flying upside down.
“Yeah, don’t do that,” Bridget told her.
“Don’t worry. I won’t!”
“You ready?”
Hudson would be waiting.
“Yeah.”
“One, two…”
On three, Audrey stepped off the platform. She let out a little shriek at the momentary sensation of falling before the line caught. Then she was flying through the air, the trees zipping by. And it was thrilling! The forest opened up around her and she realized she was zooming across a little valley. It stretched out below her, pretty as a postcard before more woods swallowed her again. In the distance, she saw the next platform, saw the ramp she was aiming for. And she saw Hudson waiting. Audrey was already pedaling her feet, searching for purchase as she came in, faster than she expected. Taking the sudden weight of her body had her pitching forward, into a stumbling run. But Hudson caught her, as promised, wrapping his arms around her and absorbing the last of the momentum.
Audrey’s breath wooshed out.
“You did it!” He grinned down at her, his eyes sparkling.
“Yes, I did!” Adrenaline pumped through her system, and it was the most natural thing in the world to follow the excitement and throw her arms around his shoulders, pressing her lips to his.
His mouth was warm and firm and tasted faintly of mint. And it didn’t soften under hers. In fact, he didn’t move a muscle—not to pull her closer or push her away. The shock of what she’d done rippled through her and Audrey froze. A second later she dropped back to her feet, her face feeling like a five-alarm fire. “Um. Sorry about that.”
She couldn’t look at him as she stepped out of his arms. He didn’t fight to keep her there.
“No worries.” His tone was easy, unconcerned, as if women threw themselves at him every day. Maybe they did. “Want to go again?”
Yes, yes, I would, but I wish you’d kiss me back.
But he was talking about ziplining. And yeah, she wanted to do that again, too. Not meeting the eyes of the staff member manning this particular platform, she just nodded and let him switch her over to the next line. Then, without a word, she jumped and hoped the wind would cool the mortification still flaming in her cheeks.
~*~
At the end of the zipline course, Audrey made excuses to get back to camp. Hudson let her because he needed the space. Neither of them had made eye contact since that kiss. He knew she was embarrassed, and he felt like a dick leaving the giant elephant between them. But drawing attention to it would only make things worse. It couldn’t happen again. She made him forget, made him feel good, and he didn’t deserve that. When she rode the golf cart back to camp proper, he opted to walk.
He’d hoped it would clear his head. But all he managed was several instant replays, where he responded to that soft, sweet mouth on his. Needing to get himself grounded, he slipped out his phone, chancing that this high up, he might have enough signal to check-in on John.
One bar. Probably not enough for a call, but he could still text.
Hey Rach. Just checking in. How is he today?
The reply came back as Hudson was cresting the ridge, bringing the central camp buildings into view.
Rachel: The same. Why are you texting? You’re not supposed to have your phone.
Hudson: You can always reach me. You know that.
Rachel: You’re on vacation. Act like it.
Seriously? Did she, of all people, think he’d be able to switch everything off and just go on living as if his best friend, his brother of the heart, wasn’t lying, unresponsive in a hospital bed?
His phone pinged with another text.
Rachel: He’d be pissed you’re doing this, you know.
Then he could damned well wake up and tell Hud so himself.
Hudson: I love you both.
Rachel: We know. Love you back. Go play.
Play. He’d done that for a precious stretch this morning. Focused on this place, this woman—both far removed from home and work and tragedy. He felt guilty as hell about forgetting, even for a moment, but Audrey’s infectious enthusiasm was a drug he wanted another hit of.
Well, now he had fresh guilt to add to the pile. He couldn’t shake the sense that he owed Audrey an apology. Not that he knew exactly how to say it. Look, I’m sorry I didn’t kiss you back the way I wanted. It’s not you, it’s me. My life is a mess, I’m an asshole, and you don’t actually want to be involved with me.
Right. That would make her feel better.
She was better off if he stayed away. He managed to convince himself of that for at least a few hours, but by late afternoon, he sought her out. Even if he’d mucked up the nascent friendship—or whatever the hell was between them—he needed to know she was okay. After the highly physical morning, Hudson expected Audrey would be hanging in the crafts hut or the pottery studio. He remembered how excited she’d been about getting her hands dirty. Instead, he found her at the ropes course, strapping on yet another helmet and harness.
Well, you go girl. He stood for a long moment, admiring her moxie. Then, before he could think better of it, he was asking if there was room for one more.
“The hermit emerges,” Charlie quipped.
“We aren’t all as social as you,” Hudson retorted.
Sam gave him a long, speculative look, but not the eat shit and die glare he expected. So maybe Audrey hadn’t said anything about the kiss. Considering the speed with which she was attempting to climb that ladder and get away from him, it looked like she was still embarrassed.
Ready to leap into action, he kept a sharp eye on her until she made it up to the first perch. Then he slipped into his own safety gear and went up after her. His greater height and reach gave him an advantage in catching up. Whereas Charlie and Sam went straight for the upper levels of the course, Audrey was being smart and starting with the easier obstacles. So at least her desire to get away from him wasn’t overriding good sense.
He left her to it, circling around from the other side as she worked her way through each section. Only when she made it to the upper reaches, to the tougher part, did he draw near. By then all her concentration was on foot placement and hand-holds. He made it to the top ahead of her and waited, watching as she slowly picked her way across the net bridge. Far below, Sam and Charlie shouted encouragement, having already finished their run.
Audrey was trembling with exhaustion. Hudson could see it as she made it to the next perch. One obstacle left to get to the end. The hardest.
“You can do it, Audrey!” Sam called.
“I’ll need a nap after this,” Audrey answered. She took a moment to catch her breath, then stretched out her arm, reaching for the next bar. It was several inches out of her grasp.
“You’ll have to take the leap,” he said, not so loud that those on the ground could hear.
She didn’t take her focus off her goal. After a long moment, she said, “Tried that once today. Didn’t end so well.”
So, she had heard him.
“Took me by surprise.”
Audrey looked at him then, a mix of exasperation and disbelief on her features. “Really? You’re gonna go with that?”
“It’s the truth.” But it wasn’t the whole truth. “Look, this morning wasn’t about you. I’m...dealing with some stuff.” He knew he couldn’t just leave it there. “Make it over here to the other side, and I’ll tell you.”
“Promise?”
He held up his hand in a Boy Scout salute. “I’m a man of my word.”
Audrey seemed to consider that for a long moment. Then she nodded, her eyes going back to the bars. She was too short to make it easily, but it was clear she was about to try. Hudson readied himself to retrieve her if she missed one of the narrow rungs that crossed the chasm and ended up dangling from her safety harness. Still, he wasn’t prepared when she jumped for the first handhold. He sucked in a breath. But her fingers closed around it, leaving her dangling, feet nowhere near the row of steps across the bottom. Her legs swung, her arms straining as she lurched forward, reaching for the next bar. She grabbed it. Amazed, Hudson watched as she repeated the performance, working her way across the final obstacle as if it were a set of elementary school monkey bars.
There was nothing more for her to grab onto at the final perch. Nothing except him. He opened his arms, waiting to catch her, wondering if her trust was so damaged that she’d rather not finish than do this. But Audrey didn’t hesitate, pitching herself forward the last few feet to crash into him. Cheers went up from below. Hudson stepped back, tugging her away from the edge, out of view of their audience.
He ought to let her go. He’d done the bare minimum and caught her. But his arms wouldn’t release, and he couldn’t look away from her big blue eyes. Her adrenaline was up again. He could see it in the thump of her pulse, feel it in the tremble against his body. But she wasn’t smiling this time. Neither was he. Somehow his hand lifted of its own volition, threading into the hair at her nape. Yeah, soft as it looked.
“Good job,” he murmured.
Tension drew taut between them, and he knew he was going to kiss her. He shouldn’t. But he’d damn himself later.
“Are you seeing somebody?” she blurted.
“Right now, I’m looking at you.” At her fearless determination and refusal to accept limitations. It was sexy as hell.
“That’s...that’s not what I meant.”
Hudson stroked a thumb along her cheek. “I’m not with anybody, no.”
“Then perhaps we could have this conversation somewhere with a little less altitude. The way you’re looking at me makes me dizzy.”
He smiled a little at that. “Yeah, we can do that. You up for a walk?”
“Lead the way.”