Chapter Sixteen

Happy birthday to me. I took refuge in Declan’s arms the remainder of the night on the sunroom couch. I lay with my head in his lap, him stroking my hair. My parents had gone to bed upset, especially Momma. She didn’t want Tamara anywhere near me or my baby. Part of me felt that way too, but I used to have great love and admiration for my ex-mother-in-law. And now to hear she was dying caused a dizzying set of emotions to whirl inside of me.

“Do you ever think I’m too much?”

He stopped stroking my hair. “No. I can’t get enough of you.”

I drew closer to him.

“I love you, Mel.” He began stroking my hair again.

“I know.”

“I’m sorry if I acted like I was going to pee on you to mark my territory.”

That got me to laugh. “Thank you for not going that route.”

“I’ve never wanted to throw a punch more in my life.”

“I could tell.”

“What are you going to do?”

“That’s a good question. Tamara has invited me to their cottage tomorrow night for dinner.”

I felt Declan tense.

“If I go, would you come with me?”

He immediately relaxed.

I turned over so I could look up into his face. It wasn’t as easy as it used to be. “You know I’m not in love with Greyson anymore, right?”

He ran his finger down my cheek. “I could see in his eyes he’s still in love with you, and even though he’s terminated his legal rights to your baby, the fact remains, you will always be connected to him through your son.”

“And this bothers you.”

“Not for the reasons you think.”

“Then tell me.”

“Mel, you don’t know how much I wish you were carrying our child. How much I regret our years apart. I’ll love your son like my own; I just hope he’ll feel the same way.”

I reached up and rested my hand on his cheek. “Declan Shaw, this baby is going to think the world of you, just like his mother.”

He took my hand and kissed the inside of it. “If you want to meet them for dinner, I’ll go with you.”

“No peeing on me, okay?”

He wrapped me up in his arms, laughing. “I make no promises.”

I lay in bed that night thinking about what I should do. My conscience was being a nuisance. It kept reminding me of all the shopping and lunch dates I’d had with Tamara. How she nursed me back to health on occasion when I was sick. And how she treated me like the daughter she never had. But it was hard to forget her turning her back on me. Then I thought about what kind of person I really was, and what I wanted to teach my son. Did I want to be vindictive or forgiving? I couldn’t be both.

In the end that made my decision for me. I wanted my son to be kind and forgiving and that started with me. It didn’t mean that I had to agree with what she had done, but for my own sake I needed to forgive her. And she was dying. That hit me harder than I thought it would under the circumstances.

I thought about Greyson too. I wanted to take more pleasure in the fact that he was getting his just desserts. Don’t get me wrong, there was a part of me that felt like he deserved it and maybe I was a tad happy in that evil sort of way, but I knew how much he loved his mother and I felt sorry for him.

But most of all I thought of Declan and how much I loved him. How I think I never stopped loving him. We just hit the pause button for an extended period of time. No one had ever made me feel so loved or wanted.

And did I ever need him as we drove down Seaside Boulevard to the cottages Dallas Harper owned. Declan rubbed his thumb across my hand while he drove. “What are you thinking?”

“That I’m crazy for doing this.”

“I’m going to agree with you.”

“Thanks.” I smiled over at him. “And I’m kind of bummed.”

“What about?”

“The red bungalow is under contract.”

“I told you to go look at it.”

“It was so expensive.”

“You’re telling me.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “How do you know?”

He cleared his throat. “I looked it up after you talked about it so much.”

“Oh. It’s nice, isn’t it?”

“Very nice.”

I sighed.

He squeezed my hand. “I’m sorry you’re bummed, but I have a feeling we’ll both end up in the right place.”

“I can’t think about it until after the baby comes and I get through this dinner. Thank you for coming with me.”

“I wouldn’t be anywhere else.”

“Please make sure to check the testosterone at the door.”

“Now, baby, what fun would that be?”

“I think fun is the last thing that will be happening tonight.”

“Says you. We’re going to pick up where we left off last night in the pool.”

“That was fun. And my parents go to bed early.” I sounded like I was in high school again.

He wagged his eyebrows. “Even better.”

The playful talk helped calm my nerves, but they crept back up when we arrived at the resort.

Declan held me close as we headed toward the yellow cottage. The resort had several cottages, all in bright colors. Of course, Greyson rented one of the larger ones. I had to hand it to Dallas, he had done a nice job with the resort. It looked like the place was booked, which was saying something considering tourist season wasn’t in full swing yet.

The smell of barbecue wafted on the breeze while the sound of couples playing at the beach filled in for background noise. Though it couldn’t mask the pounding of my heart. I thought I was done with this part of my life. I was moving on. I had found love again.

We arrived sooner than I was ready, but I was never going to be ready. I took a steadying breath before we walked up the wooden steps to the small porch of the yellow-shingled cottage. Declan knocked for us. It was a good thing as I was having thoughts of leaving. He kissed my head for reassurance.

Greyson answered the door within seconds. He was on the phone. Shocker. He waved us in, scowling at Declan. He walked into the kitchen jabbering away about business as per his usual.

I locked eyes with Tamara and took in the aroma of her prized chicken piccata. She knew how much I loved that dish and how I could never quite master her recipe. Her azure eyes looked as worried as I felt. I could tell she had lost some weight. Her wrinkled skin was sagging more than the last time I had seen her, but her gray hair and makeup were flawless as usual.

We both seemed at a loss for words. I was grateful for Declan stepping in. “I’m Declan, ma’am.” He held his hand out to her. I knew how difficult that must have been for him, but it made me love him all the more.

Her aged, manicured hand took his. She was the picture of elegance and grace. I had always admired that about her. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” She didn’t sound so sure. She dropped his hand quickly and focused back on me and the ever-growing belly under my black blouse.

“Tamara.” I found the courage to speak.

Hurt filled her eyes. I used to call her mom. She stepped closer. “Melanie, you look radiant.”

“Thank you.”

She looked like she wanted to embrace me, but held off. I appreciated that. “Dinner is ready to be served.”

Normally that was good news, but nerves had me feeling a little queasy. I smiled anyway.

“Do you mind eating out on the patio?” Tamara asked. “I love the view.”

“Not at all,” I answered for us.

We followed her back through the furnished cottage, styled in an aquatic theme. We had to pass through the kitchen where Greyson was still engaged in conversation to get to the patio door.

“Greyson.” Tamara meant business. “Please get off the phone. I would like your help serving.”

I could never have gotten away with that, at least not without receiving a cold stare, but for his mother he easily complied.

Declan and I slipped out. Normally, I would have offered to help, but this felt surreal to me and they weren’t my favorite people anymore.

Declan helped me into the wrought iron chair and took the one next to me around the round umbrellaed table. The breeze was picking up and the salt in the air lingered.

“You okay?” Declan checked in with me.

“I’m ready for this to be over.”

“Me too. I’m not exactly feeling loved here.”

I leaned in and kissed his cheek. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“I can’t wait.”

Our brief moment alone ended when Greyson and Tamara walked out with the food. Uncomfortable silence hung in the air.

I took Declan’s hand under the table.

Greyson looked as unhappy as I’d ever seen him.

Tamara was pensive. “I hope you still love chicken piccata?” She set a salad bowl on the table.

I nodded that I did.

She let out a breath and took a seat next to Declan, leaving Greyson to sit by me. So awkward, but I had a feeling Tamara did it on purpose. She was barking up a tree that had been chopped down and run through a wood chipper.

“Please help yourself.” Tamara waved at the spread.

No one moved for what seemed like an eternity, but it couldn’t have been more than thirty seconds.

“I know this is under less than ideal circumstances, but please.” Tamara pleaded with me.

I reached for a roll. “Thank you for dinner. It looks wonderful.”

That seemed to give everyone else permission to fill up their plates.

“So Declan,” Greyson said his name with such vitriol, “what do you do for a living?”

Declan set his glass of water down. “I’m the district manager for a large heavy equipment vendor.”

“How many people do you oversee?”

“Everyone in the Charleston and nearby areas.” Declan was getting annoyed.

“Where did you go to school?” Here we go. Greyson had to make sure Declan knew he was a Harvard graduate.

“Undergrad at Virginia Tech. MBA from Columbia.”

“Not as good as Harvard’s, but passable.”

I placed my hand on Declan’s leg hoping he wouldn’t play Greyson’s game. “And I went to Clemson and I’m a CFO. Will you please pass the salad dressing?” I asked Tamara.

She grinned as she handed it to me, I’m sure in response to my previous statement. “Where are you working now?”

“I’m working for my dad.”

“Construction company, right?” Tamara seemed pleased she remembered.

“Yes.”

“I suppose that means you two see each other often?” Greyson grimaced.

“As often as we can.” Declan smirked at Greyson.

“And how did you two meet?” Greyson wasn’t letting it drop.

“Please, can we stop this? Greyson, Declan and I are none of your business.”

“There’s more than you to consider.” Greyson stared at midsection.

“You walked away.” My blood was boiling. “And Declan has been more of a father to my baby than you ever would have been.”

Declan held my hand like a vice.

Greyson pushed away from the table. “We’ll never know now, will we?” He stalked off into the cottage.

Tamara’s eyes welled up with tears. “He’s having a harder time letting go than he thought he would.”

That brought me no comfort whatsoever. “I think we should go.”

“Melanie, please give me a few more moments of your time.”

I met her tear-filled eyes. “Tamara, I don’t know what you want from me. You pushed me and my son out of your life, not to mention how you humiliated me and left me alone when I needed you more than ever.”

Her shoulders began to shake. “You don’t know how sorry I am for that,” she cried.

Her tears and frail exterior made me feel awful.

Declan wisely stood. “I’m going to give you two a moment alone. If you need me, Mel, I’ll be right past the dunes.” He kissed my head.

I took his vacated seat so I could be closer to Tamara.

Tamara watched him walk away. “Do you love him?”

“Very much.”

Her face fell in disappointment. “We’ve missed you.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

She reached out her hand and rested it on my arm. “If I could undo the past several months, I would.”

I used to think that way too, but I was happier with Declan than I had ever been with Greyson. “I’m happy.”

“I see that in your eyes.”

I nodded awkwardly. “I’m sorry to hear about your illness.”

“We all have to go sometime.” She rubbed my arm. “But I can’t go until we make amends.”

“That’s going to take some time.”

“That’s why I’m staying here.”

Wow. That was quite the twist in the plot. I hope that didn’t mean that her son was staying.

“I haven’t told Greyson yet, but I could do with some sea air and a change of scenery. And,” she looked longingly at my baby, who was kicking me in the ribs. “I want to meet that grandson of mine.” Tears rolled down her cheek. “And I miss my daughter.”

What did I say to that?