Chapter Three

Joy glanced at the clock in Holly Douglas’ home. It was ten minutes to nine. How close did Malcolm plan to cut it? Maybe he was changing from his dark and depressing brown cloak to something more Christmassy. She hoped he could at least change the cloak’s color. If he chose red, he’d look like the wolf dressed up as Little Red Riding Hood. How appropriate. Green, and he would resemble an elf, but since he was easily over six feet tall, he’d look more like Merlin.

Why did he wear a cloak? No other spirit she’d met wore a cloak. Most of them wore what they were used to wearing in life, as she did. She smoothed down her princess cut, Kelly-green velvet dress, with the wide sleeves. It brought out the green tones in her eyes and showed off her waist and calves.

The cute ankle-high matching boots had been an inspiration, not her own though. That was Mrs. Ferrisletter’s suggestion, one of her old trainers from when she became a spirit guide. As usual, she’d wrapped her hair in a tight bun, a habit from her nursing days.

She looked at Holly, who had fallen asleep in her chair. Poor thing was wiped out from working at her One of a Kind Christmas Shop. The idea of every ornament and decoration being one of a kind was absolutely wonderful. Though Cameron thought of it, it was Holly that made it happen, according to the file.

Holly was dressed practically in a pair of jeans and a pretty aqua blue sweater with a white snowflake pin that had a special design in the middle, though from where Joy floated, she couldn’t see what it was exactly.

She glanced at the clock again. Two minutes to nine. Where was Malcolm?

The subtle scent of bayberry caught her attention before she felt his presence behind her. She took a deep breath, nervous at how sensitive she was to him. She’d be mortified if he ever discovered she dreamed about him, never mind what those dreams were about.

Slowly, she turned to find him floating just behind her right shoulder, his face almost invisible in the darkness of his brown hood. Changing had obviously not occurred to him. “I’m glad you arrived in time. I didn’t want to start without you.”

He nodded but didn’t say anything.

She grinned. “Don’t tell me you’re going to play the role of Scrooge’s Spirit of Christmas Future. Don’t you think that’s a bit over dramatic? Not to mention far too English for a Scotsman?”

He turned toward her. “I was simply acknowledging your observation on my timeliness.”

She chuckled. “Now you really sound like an Englishman.”

At his scowl, she turned away, biting her cheek to keep from laughing.

The clock began to strike the ninth hour.

“Shall we?” She looked back at him. Hooking her arm within his, she pulled him forward even as his eyes widened. She was too excited to meet Holly face to face to care what he thought.

As they stopped in front of their assignment, two things struck her one after the other. The first was that the little design in Holly’s snowflake pin was a fairy and beautifully etched. The second thing was that while Holly was still asleep, the large gray cat sat on its own chair staring at them.

Malcolm leaned in. “That cat shouldn’t be able to see us.”

She nodded, just as surprised as him.

When the grandfather clock stopped chiming, they both stared as the gray cat walked onto the arm of his chair, jumped across the short distant to the other chair where Holly slept and pounced into her lap, effectively waking her up.

“What? Really Mac?” She grabbed him up and as she lifted him onto the arm of her chair, she noticed them. “Oh, hi.” Her gaze flitted to the clock before coming back to them. “Sorry. I never seem to be able to stay awake for Christmas Eve visitors. You must be Malcolm and Joy.”

Joy smiled. “That’s quite all right. You’ve had a long day, I’m sure.”

“What a beautiful dress. I could never wear something like that.” Holly sat straighter as she looked down. “Oh and I love your boots. I need to find a pair of those.”

“Thank you.” Cameron’s wife was a delight. She seemed very comfortable with them.

Holly turned to Malcolm. “Malcolm, if we’re going to fly away together, you must show me your face. The hood thing is all fine for drama, but we’re on the same team here.”

Joy pursed her lips to keep from smiling.

Malcolm acquiesced to Holly’s request and dropped his hood back, revealing his scruffy chin in profile. Joy’s body took notice, and she suddenly wished he’d pull it up again. The man was walking sensuality, at least to her.

“Holy crap!” Holly faced her. “Did you know he was this hot?”

Luckily, Malcolm saved her from having to answer that. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Holly. Are you ready for your journey to begin?”

Holly continued to stare at Malcolm.

Joy cleared her throat. “Holly. Holly?”

Finally, Holly turned toward her. “Yes?”

“Malcolm asked if you’re ready to begin your journey?”

Holly looked back at Malcolm then returned her gaze to her. “Absolutely.” She rose from the chair.

“Wonderful.” Joy waited as Holly’s gaze flitted back toward Malcolm before finally returning to her. She didn’t really blame her. His dark good looks took some getting used to. “This visit is a little different because we’re the Spirits of Christmas Future, which means that you’ll see things no one else will know for years.”

“And I must promise to not reveal anything I see, right?”

Malcolm nodded. “Aye. If you don’t think you can keep these secrets, we’ll have to skip the visit.”

Holly scowled at him and crossed her arms. “Excuse me. I didn’t reveal a single thing I learned from Coco and Ian’s visit. I’m sure I can keep secret whatever you choose to show me.”

“You must be sure.”

Holly gave an exasperated sigh. “I promise.”

The cat took that moment to meow loudly.

Holly turned back. “What, Mac? You have plenty of food and your litter box is clean. What else could you want? I’ll only be gone minutes your time, if that.”

Joy watched in fascination as the cat seemed to accept Holly’s answer and proceeded to jump onto the seat of the chair Holly had just vacated and lay down.

“Really, Mac?” Holly turned to face them. “He demanded that he take my chair over there, forcing me to use Cam’s. Now suddenly, he wants Cam’s chair back?”

Joy shook her head. “Usually animals can’t see us. He’s a very special cat.”

“Believe me, I know. Even Cam doesn’t know why he can pet Mac.”

Joy froze. That was impossible. She glanced over at Malcolm, who was looking at her as well. Somehow, she knew he agreed that something was afoot. They’d have to talk about it on their first break.

Turning back to Holly, she gave her a smile. “I understand you enjoy flying.”

“I do. I mean, when I’m phased. I’m not big on airplanes. Do you want to phase me now?”

“I’d be happy too.” Joy laid her hand on Holly’s shoulder and phased her. The living couldn’t see those who were phased. The only reason clients could see spirit guides was because Cameron made it possible before they officially visited.

Holly floated around in a circle, her smile showing exactly how much she enjoyed flying. She finally stopped in front of them. “I don’t know why Cam said he hoped I wouldn’t be able to fly after I die.”

Again, Joy glanced at Malcolm to find him also frowning at Holly’s statement. Maybe Cam hoped that Holly would serve in a different capacity after she joined him.

Now that she thought about it though, all the spirit guides were single, every one. There were definitely sexual goings-on, but no actual couples. She’d never even thought of it before. Maybe couples went somewhere else in the afterlife.

Malcolm held out his hand. “Come. It’s time for your first visit.”

“My pleasure.” Holly slipped her hand into Malcolm’s.

Joy felt a little jealousy that she was on the other side of Holly. She’d much prefer touching Malcolm, but then again, if she wanted to keep her composure, she was better off right where she was.

He looked at her as if to ask if she was ready, so she nodded, and he flew them through the high-ceiling of Holly’s house on Main Street, Deervale then toward Glasgow.

Holly’s smile proved her love of flying. When Erskine Cancer Center came into sight, she turned serious. “Are we going to visit Thea?”

She squeezed Holly’s hand. “Yes, we are.”

“I hope the bone marrow transplant went well. The poor girl spent last Christmas here.”

Malcolm phased them through the roof of the building and down to the fourth floor. They stopped outside a patient room.

“Wait a minute. This is critical care.”

“That’s correct.” Malcolm let go of Holly’s hand and opened his arm toward the door.

Holly hesitated. “Is her family in there?”

Joy released her hand and patted her shoulder. “No, not yet.”

Holly didn’t respond. Instead, she floated through the door.

Joy turned to Malcolm. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

He shrugged. “It’s part of the reality of her future.”

“I’m not so sure. It’s not as if Sophia has told her about Thea. I still don’t see how this will help Holly be open to change or deepen her relationships. Sophia is far too needy for Holly to take on. It just seems like additional heartache for her when she’s already suffered enough.”

Malcolm’s eyes narrowed. “Others have suffered far worse. This is important for her to deal with and for the later ramifications.”

The man’s tone had lowered, almost as if he, himself, had been the one to suffer greater loss. If he planned to force Holly into feeling whatever he felt, they were not going to get along at all. “Care to enlighten me on those ramifications?”

“No.” Malcolm turned away from her and floated into the patient room.

She headed for the room as well then halted. Emotional reactions to others’ rudeness never worked out well. Taking a cleansing breath, she exhaled and proceeded through the wall.

Holly leaned over the sleeping eighteen-year-old. “She’s so much thinner than the last time I saw her. I thought Thea was getting a bone marrow transplant.”

Malcolm hovered at the foot of the bed. “She was supposed to, but they found more cancer and had to do additional chemo.”

Holly’s scowl was all for Malcolm, and it gave Joy a certain tiny pleasure. “And how did that go?”

“It went well.” Malcolm floated to the other side of Thea’s bed. “She had to gain her strength back from that and while she recuperated at home, her boyfriend kissed her, unaware that he had the flu. It compromised her immune system. They brought her here to help her, but it doesn’t look good.”

The tears in Holly’s eyes tugged at Joy’s heart, and she floated over to her, wrapping her arm around her shoulders. “I know it’s hard.”

Holly’s head snapped around to look at her. “Are you saying she’ll die?”

Joy looked away, unwilling to make the pronouncement.

Malcolm, though, had no compunction. “Aye.” By the way he said it, Joy was almost sure he enjoyed telling Holly the hurtful news.

Holly narrowed her gaze at him. “When? What time period are we in. I don’t see a Christmas tree in here like last year when I visited with Coco and Ian.”

Malcolm’s gaze didn’t waver. “This is two years later and aye, it’s Christmas.”

Holly floated up to Malcolm. “Then how come there’s no tree or decorations. Where’s her family? Where’s Sophia?”

Just then the door to the room opened and Sophia walked in. The smile she had on her face immediately disappeared once she saw that Thea was asleep. The woman walked past Malcolm and Holly to reach the side of the bed where Joy floated. She moved out of the way to observe Holly’s reaction.

“Oh, poor Sophia.” Holly pointed. “She looks haggard.”

Sophia sat next to the bed and moved the blanket farther up Thea’s body. “You need to pull through for me, sis. You’re all I have left. Mum’s and dad’s house is too big for just me. I can’t lose you, too.”

Sophia gave a half-hearted grin. “That’s right, you heard me. It’s all about me. You have to live because I need you.”

Joy had to steel herself against Holly’s frown. She looked on the verge of tears. It would be easier to trust Malcolm if he didn’t look so smug in the face of Holly’s heartbreak.

Holly stared accusingly at her and then Malcolm before she fled the room.

Joy flew after her and found her down the hall in the waiting area. “I’m sorry, Holly.”

“Why? Why show me this if I can’t tell Sophia?”

Malcolm came up behind her. “Because it’s part of your future.”

Holly crossed her arms over her chest. “Really? You won’t let me befriend Sophia so I can help her, and then you show me this?”

Malcolm didn’t say a word and doubt crept up Joy’s spine. Did he also have an alternative motive for this assignment, like Cameron? Was she the only one who simply wanted to help Holly? With anger starting to form, she shook her head. “There’s no rule against you befriending Sophia.”

Holly’s eyes widened. “But I thought I wasn’t supposed to interfere with her life. I mean, am I allowed to change the future based on what I see here?”

“Yes.”

“No.” Malcolm’s response came at the same time as her own.

She looked at him in shock, but he was staring at Holly. “Excuse us, Holly. Obviously, we need to talk.” Grabbing his hand, she whisked him back to her home. Holly would be fine as they would return at the very next second in her time.

When they arrived at her place, Joy withdrew her hand from Malcolm’s and rounded on him. “What do you mean she can’t change the future? That’s exactly what Cameron wanted us to motivate her to do.”

He solidified and strolled toward her couch. “That’s not what he said. He said he wanted her to be open to change and closer relationships.”

She threw her hands up, disgusted with her show of emotion, but unable to control it at the moment. “I would think instituting change is a great way of proving she’s open to it, don’t you think? And what could be better than forming a close friendship with Sophia?”

“Lapsir in a glass.” Malcolm called for the red drink and when it appeared on her end table, he picked it up and took a sip as if he hadn’t heard her.

“Malcolm. Answer me.”

He lifted his gaze to hers and in a brief moment she witnessed raw pain before it was hidden behind a thoughtful countenance. “I’m simply treading carefully. Cameron is being manipulated as are we. If we don’t get this right, there will be dire consequences as you already pointed out.”

She solidified and rested her hands on the back of her recliner, somewhat embarrassed by her display after his calm answer. “I understand that, but even with normal cases, the whole point is to help the living see what’s in store for them. It’s always their decision on what to do about it. If Holly wants to befriend Sophia, then why not? Why even show her Thea if she couldn’t?”

Malcolm continued to stare into the red liquor in his hand.

She took the opportunity to study him. His outside might be as hot as Holly observed, but his inside seemed a bit rough. It appeared she needed to know the inside as well if they were to get through this.

“Malcolm?”

Malcolm cursed himself for taking the shortcut through the underground alley. What was a few more minutes delay in getting Blair home and into their bedroom? They had all night now that they were consummates.

But because he was too anxious to get her naked, they stood face to face with three criminals who didn’t look like they cared one wit about life or death. He felt Blair shudder against his back. He’d die to protect her, but not until after she escaped. “What do you want?” As if he didn’t know.

The smaller of the three, but the obvious leader, grinned, showing yellow teeth in a serious stage of decay. “I wouldn’t mind a piece of her, but I’ll settle for your bills.” The man waved his gun. “But don’t try anything, or we’ll take her too.”

He clenched his jaw to keep from vocalizing a threat that would only get them killed. “Fine.” Slowly, he reached his hand down to unlatch his sporran. Pulling out his wallet, he opened it.

“Take it.” The leader nodded to one of his muscle men.

The big guy grabbed at his wallet, but he pulled it back. “You said you wanted the bills.”

The little guy sneered. “Just need to make sure we get all of them.”

Schitz, this wasn’t good.

The big guy pulled it out of his hand.

Stealthily, Malcolm reached behind his back to take Blair’s hand and started moving away.

“Stop.”

He halted as the leader trained the gun on him. He quickly put himself between his soulmate and the weapon. “What? You have what you wanted.”

“What’s the rush? I need to make sure it’s enough.”

Malcolm waited until the man’s gaze moved to investigate the wallet. Then he pushed Blair behind a commercial trash receptacle.

“What the fux?” The leader looked up at him and glared. “You’re a fuxing Watchman.”

The two other miscreants’ eyes widened before a growl issued from one and a yell from the other.

He dropped to the ground and rolled to grab up a metal pipe that had missed getting into the trash. As he rose, the first man was on him. He let the pipe precede him straight into the big man’s jaw, sending him flying backwards to land flat on his back.

But the other muscle man swung, so he ducked. Unfortunately, wrestling must have been the criminal’s pastime if the strength of his choke hold was any indication. As a Watchman, Malcolm had been assigned to end the underground fighting ring, which no doubt had this muscle man as a member.

But he wasn’t a Watchman in just looks. Grasping the big man’s arm around his throat, he bent forward, dropping to his knees, and sent the man over him, the arm loosening enough for him to twist the wrist and escape the hold. He slammed his elbow into the man’s face before jumping up to defend against the kick of the first man.

He grabbed the booted foot heading for his mouth and twisted hard. The man fell to the ground moaning.

With the two biggest threats reduced, he turned to find the leader.

“Malcolm!”

Blair’s scream chilled his heart. He raced toward the sound to find the leader dragging her toward the end of the alley almost to the opening to street above. If the man reached the main road, Malcolm would lose her. He raced toward them.

He couldn’t lose her. She was his life.

His heart squeezed at the realization he wouldn’t reach her in time. With nothing to lose, he yelled. “Halt or be eliminated!”

The Watchman cry had the desired effect. The leader stopped, losing his advantage.

Malcolm caught up.

The leader’s furtive movements made it clear that without his muscle, he was like a cornered rat. “Stop or I’ll kill her.” The gun in his hand, pointed at Blair, shook.

Malcolm slowed to a stop. A hostage situation he could handle. “Let her go, and I’ll let you go.”

The fearful chuckle the man gave was telling. “I’m not stupid.” He nodded toward the alley where the two other men still lay. “I know what a Watchman can do. I let her go and I end up with a slow death. Uh-uh, no thanks. She’s my lifeline.”

He’d just have to sweeten the pot. “You’re smarter than I thought. I should have known the way you set up that ambush. I’ll not only agree to let you go if you return her to me, but I’ll never bring you in, even if I see you again. You’ll look pretty impressive to your competition then.”

Malcolm paused, watching the play of emotion on the man’s face. He was definitely interested. “In fact, if you want to eliminate some of your competition, you can find me and give me their whereabouts. That way we both win. All you have to do is let her go.”

The small man’s face took on a clever gleam. “She must mean a lot to you.”

Schitz. He’d made the deal too good. He shrugged his shoulders. “It’s more that I’m supposed to be protecting her, and it won’t look good on my record if I lose her.”

“Aw, poor Watchman screwed up, out gunned by a criminal. That does sound sweet.” The man’s excitement at that prospect was too real.

“As good as that would feel for you, think of all the territory and followers you could gain if you take my deal.”

The small man wiggled his brows. “That would be nice.”

“Hand her over and it’s all yours.”

The man licked his lips. “It’s tempting. Almost as tempting as she is.” He looked at Blair, the gleam in his eye telling Malcolm a second too late that it wasn’t going to work.

The gun went off and the man shoved Blair at him.

He caught her as his breath clogged in his lungs.

“Malcolm?” Her soft voice tore at his heart.

Laying her down as he sunk to the ground, he stared at the blood soaking her pretty silver dress, turning it a rusty brown. It was a fatal shot. Tearing his gaze from the sight, he looked Blair in her beautiful brown eyes. “It will be okay. We’ll get you to hospital. I already hear the ambulance siren.”

“I love you, Malcolm.”

“I know. Tha gaol agam ort, leannan. Just hold on.”

Her fingers found his and she squeezed. “I’ll always be your sweetheart now.”

He nodded, his throat too tight to say anything, but he didn’t have to. Blair’s eyes closed as she took her final, shuddering breath. His chest filled with pain as he lifted his face to the dark arched ceiling above and yelled out his anguish.

“Malcolm, where are you? Do you hear me?”

He didn’t understand why he could hear the female voice in his head. Blair’s lips didn’t move. She was dead because of him.

“Malcolm.” The hand on his shoulder squeezed, and he looked up to find a woman with auburn hair and exquisite upturned eyes. The scene behind her was a home with an old-fashioned Southwest American look.

He blinked. Schitz, he hadn’t had that strong a memory since he first transitioned.

“Malcolm, are you all right?” Joy looked at him with honest concern.

He waved his hand. “I’m fine.”

She squeezed his shoulder again. “You’re not fine. You were in some kind of trance.”

“It was just a memory.” He shrugged to dislodge her hand, the comfort reminding him that nothing ever positive came from getting involved with a woman. Then why did you choose her as your partner?

He shook off his own question. Joy was the best spirit guide there was, as simple as that. Plus, he needed to prove to her the future wasn’t as rosy as she hoped. Both were perfectly legitimate reasons.

She sat next to him on the couch. “Memory, my ass. You wouldn’t answer me for at least twenty-minutes of living time.”

He rubbed his forehead. “That wasn’t just a memory then.” Which meant he was being manipulated and he didn’t like it. The last thing he needed was to feel that way again. Last time, he’d been manipulated, it had sent him into a tailspin that eventually ended in his own death.

Someone wanted him to remember the night Blair was killed. The question was how was he supposed to react to it. The feelings churning in his gut had nothing to do with the case, at least he hoped not.

Joy shook her head. “What was the memory? It must be important to our assignment.” Her gaze held fear, not that much different from Blair’s.

He stood and walked to the short, stone fireplace to look down at the cold hearth. What was he supposed to share? He didn’t want to share any of it. No one in the spirit realm knew about his past while alive.

Cameron did. And probably his superiors. The more he thought about it, the more convinced he was that the higher-ups were pulling the strings, which meant he had to reveal the truth to Joy.

Every fiber of his being rebelled, but he also didn’t want to lose his job. He’d never admit it to anyone, but his job made him feel like he was making a difference, even more than what he’d done after resigning his post as a Watchman.

“Malcolm, if it will make you feel better, I promise not to share anything with anyone…that is, if we succeed.” Joy tucked a stray hair behind her ear, another behavior to watch on her. She may appear all together, but there were clues to the woman inside and she wasn’t as sure they’d be successful as she pretended to be.

He leaned his elbow on the mantle. “The memory that flooded my mind was of the one woman I loved being shot and killed by a criminal. She died in my arms. I’m assuming I’m supposed to have some kind of emotional response to that, but it was so long ago.” He couldn’t quite bring himself to reveal the pain of having that old wound reopened and the self-doubt and guilt that permeated his psyche because of it.

Joy thankfully remained quiet, not offering any platitudes. He would have expected a bus load of sympathy or a polite recognition of his loss. That neither came gratified and disappointed him.

Finally, she looked at him. “No doubt the impending death of Thea sparked the memory, but I can’t help but wonder at the connection to you. Could it have to do with your inability to prevent the death? Maybe it’s a warning to allow Holly to interfere.”

He raised his lip in disgust. “I’d agree, but the relationship is wrong. Holly doesn’t even know Thea. Blair was my consummate.”

The sympathy his pathetic soul needed finally showed in Joy’s eyes. “Consummate? Is that a future word for wife?”

It was far more than that, but close enough. He nodded.

“I’m so sorry. That had to be devastating.” Something in the tone of her voice had him studying her.

Her remarks were the very platitudes he expected. There was no deeper emotion behind them. Of course, how could there be? She didn’t know him. She had no idea what he’d been through. What he’d done. How he’d died. He was like a hospice patient’s family member. Someone to show sympathy toward, but not someone who meant something to her.

Her brow lowered in confusion as if she sensed his thoughts.

He looked away. “We may never know the reason for my memory, but it’s another piece of evidence in this assignment.”

Joy stood and walked toward him. It wasn’t a saunter like Blair had, yet it was still purposeful. She took his hand in both of hers. “I’m very sorry you lost the woman you loved. I can’t imagine what that must feel like.”

There. There it was. The honest caring he’d hoped for…and despised. “No, you can’t.”

Joy flinched before she nodded and let go, turning away from him.

His gut tightened. It bothered him that he hurt her somehow, but wasn’t it his goal to show her everything wasn’t happy endings?

As a Watchman, he’d been given the authority to shoot if he encountered any resistance and if he killed the suspect, it was simply one extra sheet of paperwork. In the future, they didn’t play around with criminals anymore, not since the bombings nine years before he died.

But with Joy, he was missing things. For every nuance he understood and cataloged, there were other actions that didn’t conform to his template. Maybe because she’s not a suspect. He ignored his inner voice. More likely it was because she was a woman. He’d proven he wasn’t as good with female suspects, even after he’d gone rogue. “Let’s get back to Holly. We have a lot yet to cover.”

“Yes, we do.” Joy took a sip of bottled water, her graceful neck attracting his gaze as she swallowed. She put the empty down on her coffee table. “But we aren’t returning until we’re agreed that she can change the future. I know you would have if you’d had the choice.”

Aye! He would have and her words were like a kick to his gut. She was spot on. He’d go back now if he was allowed and save Blair, even if he had to die in her stead. It wasn’t as if his death had amounted to anything anyway.

“Are we agreed?” At Joy’s question, he returned his gaze to her. She couldn’t have stood any straighter, her chin lifted slightly in her determination.

Now that he hadn’t expected. “We’re agreed.” There was more to Joy than was at first obvious. She definitely had his attention.