CHAPTER ELEVEN

“Oh, that’s not fair,” Noelle said, giving Tarik’s shoulder a scolding poke. “I’d venture to guess that there hasn’t ever been a major war that supernatural beings weren’t involved in. That doesn’t make us meddlers. In fact, I’d say the sides were all pretty equally weighted since everyone had the same sorts of creatures fighting on all sides.”

Noelle really needed to get to Lola’s to pack up her things, but one debate kept turning into another. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had such a rousing discussion with anyone except Jenny. Jenny found the assertive debating wearying. Noelle couldn’t blame her. She was too gentle to talk back and preferred to be on the sidelines of most action, but when Noelle got in certain moods, Jenny sucked it up and tolerated the discussion well enough.

“Maybe so,” Tarik said, creasing the wax paper wrapper of the sandwich he’d half-eaten. “Though I suspect that some sides were weighted more than others. Western Europe has always been a hotbed of fae. The population there would have been extraordinary high in comparison to the beings that populate other parts of the globe.”

“Fair point,” Willa said, “but remember World War II. I worked as a nurse with the Allied Forces, and my brother marched with the Axis Powers. I think Noelle is right that it was a wash.”

“Are you still on speaking terms with your brother?”

Willa scoffed. “No. I don’t know if that’s so unusual for long-lived sorts like me, though. I know some demigods who’ve gone centuries without checking in on their families, and for the most part, everyone expects to not hear from each other. Same happened during the Civil War. I wasn’t in the States quite yet, but a couple of my brothers were. One fought for blue, one fought for gray, and every time their battalions engaged, they specifically gunned for each other.”

Noelle cringed.

“Do you communicate with your family still, Noelle?” Tarik asked and then, following a thud beneath the table, jerked himself upright and narrowed his golden eyes at Tamatsu.

Tamatsu sat, calm as he pleased, at Tarik’s right hand. His arms were folded over his chest, his gaze neutral, and there were six sandwich wrappers wadded comically in front of him.

“Apologies if the question was insensitive,” Tarik demurred through clenched teeth. “I forget, often, what having family means. Angels of our sort don’t tend to have them unless they make them.”

Sighing, she put her hands up. “It’s all right,” she said for Tamatsu’s benefit. He didn’t need to protect her from the subject, though she found the fact that he had to be kind.

Olive branch, maybe?

Carefully, she folded the wrapper over the ends of her dill pickle and then slowly rolled the partially eaten log into the paper. “I don’t have any family left.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Willa said.

Noelle shrugged. When she’d been in the court, family wasn’t something she discussed, and for the most part, everyone knew not to broach the subject. But then again, everyone back there had known what had happened.

She’d been eighteen or nineteen, hardly a child in those days, and had been working with Clarissa for years in some capacity or other by then.

“I wasn’t the only one,” she said. She pressed the tape over the pickle wrapper’s seam. “Several of us in the court were targeted.”

“Workers for both the king and queen?” Tarik asked.

Noelle snorted. “Hell no. No one touched his wicked bastards. Who would be so reckless?” She looked up at him.

He turned his hands over in concession.

Tamatsu was looking straight ahead at some spot that didn’t quite seem to be at Willa. He’d already heard the story. He’d heard most of her stories, long and short, and she’d known all but the most important ones of his.

Angels didn’t like to talk about why they’d Fallen. She’d never relinquished her curiosity on the matter, but she had stopped asking him to tell her.

Another mistake, probably.

“What would have been the point of attacking Clarissa’s entourage?” Willa asked.

“A weak queen makes a compliant queen,” Noelle said absently. Thinking was difficult with her mate being so near, and yet them being so useless as a pair. They were supposed to complement each other but they were out of sync.

Willa’s mouth shaped a silent 'Oh.’

“I suppose that arrogant fool wasn’t bold enough to attack Clarissa’s family directly. Instead, he tried to cut her down by targeting her support staff. I was the first up. I didn’t have warning. I couldn’t do anything to try to stop them. I was so humiliated. I’d trained with some of those assholes, and they’d walked out of my parents’ home with their swords bloody and didn’t even look my way as they passed. And then I had to live under the same roof as them.” She scoffed. “People accuse me of being vengeful, but believe it or not, I still haven’t given those fools their due. Clarissa stilled my hand on the matter.”

“But that was back then,” Tarik said.

“Yes. That was back then. I don’t know if her opinion would change any now if I were to ask her, though maybe I will. If they’re still alive, I’ll confront them. I’d like to ask them why they wouldn’t have resisted doing such a foul thing to one of their comrades. They may have worked for the king and me for the queen, but was the household of the monarchs really so divided? Shouldn’t we have cooperated?”

“They were cowards,” Tarik said. “They could have and should have said no.”

She smirked and pushed her chair back from the table. “Easy for you to see the higher moral ground, I bet.”

“Surprisingly more difficult than you’d believe, Miss Flint. I’d like to meet whatever mortal started the rumor that my kind is so imperturbable and so impossible to sully.”

“Mmm. Sully.” The word left a sour taste in her mouth. “Sully” was a word she’d been friends with hundreds of years ago. Every time she’d touched Tamatsu, she’d worried she was committing some grave sin, but she’d never been able to work up enough guilt to stop touching him. She’d never wanted to stop, even after …

She drew in a breath and passed a hand through her hair. There’d been a wide mirror mounted on the living room wall, but she’d avoided glancing at her reflection on her way in, suspecting she looked a fright. Back when she’d been “on duty,” she hadn’t been able to care less about her appearance, and that was by design. Why would anyone want to look at her when they could look at Clarissa instead? Eyes always traveled to the queen, no matter what Clarissa did to hide or what she wore. The same would probably hold true with the woman in her holey T-shirt and garden clogs. She was still lovelier than any woman had the right to be.

“Jenny hasn’t sent me a text about whether or not there were plane tickets available tonight, so I’d better go check on that. She’s probably busy with Clarissa again. I don’t want to distract her.”

“Don’t you need her?” Willa asked. “For work, I mean.”

Noelle picked up her ruined shoes and her tote, and hooked them by the heels over the top of her bag. “Can I live without her? Of course. She makes my work life exponentially easier, though. She’s more patient with people than I am and she keeps me on task. Her memory is better. Still, I imagine I’ll be fine for a few days.”

She grimaced as she passed into the living room, fearing the worse.

Maybe longer.

If Jenny found a place nearer Clarissa, and was comfortable there and felt productive there, Noelle certainly wasn’t going to guilt the woman into returning. In fact, Noelle might have done the same thing if she felt welcome.

As Noelle stepped outside into the cool air of twilight, she tapped the speed dial programming for Jenny’s number and immediately looked to the sky.

She didn’t see any partially corporeal beings hurtling from some other realm toward her, nor did she see any threats of a more mundane sort … except for the sheriff’s deputy who slowed upon seeing her.

She blew a raspberry.

Tito parked across the street and rolled his window down.

“Oh my goodness!” came Jenny’s rocket-propelled apology. “I’m so sorry. I meant to call you, but I went back to Clarissa’s thinking I’d just be there for a little while, and I got so distracted.”

“I imagine that’s easy to do there. Are you having fun catching up?” Noelle looked both ways and crossed the street to the deputy.

He raised his chin at her.

“A lot of fun,” Jenny said, “though what passes for fun for me would probably be considered pretty tame for most other people.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that, darling.”

“No need to fib. Listen, I’ll get Bill or his son John to bring me back.”

“I’m serious. Stay, if you want to, Jenny. I would if I were you.” Noelle leaned against the car, but not before spotting the reflections of a couple of angels in the glass behind her.

They’d donned their coats once more. Tamatsu had once explained to her that concealing his wings was easier when he wore certain magically enchanted objects. He didn’t have to use so much of his own energy to glamour them. They probably didn’t want to scare the locals.

“Hang out there if you think Clarissa needs the help. I’m going to go to Vegas, put some fires out, and then come back. I had a question for you, though. Do you remember where we filed away that information about Blue Shapely?”

“Blue … Blue …”

Noelle could imagine Jenny tapping her chin as she tried to recall the name.

“That Coyote, you mean?” Jenny always remembered, if given enough time.

“The very one.”

“What in the world do you need that for?”

“The Maria Coyote pack doesn’t have an alpha. There’s a lady here I’m making inquiries for.”

“Oh! Well, I put that double-confidential stuff in a special folder in my computer. On the desktop, there’s a file labeled ‘Cat Pictures.’”

Noelle snorted. “Seriously, darling?”

“What? There are cat pictures in there, but there’s also a folder way down in the list. You’ll see what I mean. The directory is password-protected on two levels, but you know all my passwords.”

“I do. Thanks.”

“Do you want me to check on your flight or ask someone to teleport you?” Jenny asked hesitantly. “I’m sorry I lost track of time.”

“I’ll take you,” Tarik said.

Noelle shot him a rude look over her shoulder.

He shrugged, unchastened. “Angels hear better than most.”

“I guess I have myself a ride,” Noelle said into her phone. “But thank you, anyway.”

“You’ll call me and let me know if you get into the file?”

“Or text you.” Noelle rolled her eyes. “Assuming I don’t get bogged down by inane client interactions before I can leave the office again. I swear that office is cursed. Every time I step into the place, I become a target for the ridiculous.”

“Maybe we should find a new line of work,” Jenny said.

“Like what? You could probably find a job anywhere because you’re likable. I’m only good at wheedling people into submission.”

“Professional dominatrix?”

Noelle snorted. “Goodbye.” She disconnected, dropped her phone into her tote, and gave the demigod deputy a pointed look.

“Saw you coming out of the house,” he said, wearing a grin that could have passed for innocent if it weren’t for his elongated cougar fangs. “Wanted to see if you needed a ride back to Ma’s.”

She folded her arms against her belly and arched a brow. “I’m not sure if I need to go back just yet. Do you think she would mind if I left my things there for a few days? I have everything that’s critical in my tote.”

“Nah, she won’t mind. So …” He turned his gaze from Noelle to one of the looming figures behind her. “You have to come back, then?”

She dragged her tongue across dry lips and rubbed the knot forming between her shoulder and neck. “I have some unfinished business.”

“Okay. Lemme know if there’s anything I can do for you.” He leaned forward and looked around Noelle at one of the angels. “We cool? Favor repaid?”

Whoever he was talking to must have given assent, because Tito nodded, turned his ignition over, and waved goodbye.

Tarik wrapped his massive hand around her forearm, did a precursory glance around, and then teleported her to the back alley of her office in Vegas.

Her knees wobbled a bit as she waited for her eyes to uncross. She’d probably need weeks to get reacquainted with traveling via angel. Some people actually liked the sensation of being spun around in a centrifuge, but Noelle had never been one of them.

She fished her keys out of the inside pouch of her bag and slid her battered feet into her shoes. “I think I have it from here. I’ve got to make a quick run into the office, but I’m going to go home and change first. Wouldn’t be a good idea for anyone in the office to see me in this state.”

Tarik raised his chin and crossed his arms over his chest in the way of triumphant gladiators and certain Roman statutes.

“What?” she asked.

“I’m merely thinking.”

“And you want to do your thinking in a Vegas back alley? I can think of better places. Like, literally anywhere that isn’t a Vegas back alley.”

He turned his wrist over and stared at the face of his gold watch.

“Fancy,” she muttered.

“A gift.”

“From whom?”

He gave her a chastising look.

“I imagine people shower you with gifts all the time and don’t even know why they’re doing it. Me? I have to fight to get a cup of coffee while it’s still hot.”

“You’re small.”

“Thanks for the reminder. I’m actually quite statuesque for an elf.” She hitched her tote up higher on her shoulder and started walking toward the street. She could take a cab home. Probably, the cabbie wouldn’t ask her any questions about her attire. After all, they were in Vegas. They saw ruined women all day long, and generally kept their mouths shut.

Tarik’s shadow loomed beside her, and then covered hers as she rounded the corner.

“Ugh, what?” she demanded without turning. She knew one of the doormen at a hotel nearby. He’d get her a cab and spare her the hassle.

“I’m simply ensuring that you get to where you’re supposed to.”

“To make sure your friend gets what he wants, right?”

“That certainly plays into my endgame.”

“Danu, help me.” They were always so damned coy. Pressing them on specifics was usually a waste of breath, and she’d learned that lesson well with Tamatsu. “I assure you, I haven’t already forgotten. I’m going to check my mother’s magic journal and see if she mentioned anything about voice capturing gone wrong. There has to be something in there.”

She waved at the doorman, Connor, as she approached.

“Hiya!” Connor gave her a long look and cringed.

“Don’t say anything, Connor, I’m warning you.”

“You look like what the cat dragged in,” he said cheerfully. He gave Tarik a long glance, blanched at the angel’s chilling stare, and then picked up the phone on the podium.

Noelle leaned against it. “Not a cat. Some kind of horror demon.”

“You really do attract the weird stuff, Noe.” Into the phone, Connor said, “I’ve got one waiting. Thanks.” He hung up.

“Thanks, Connor.”

“You really not gonna tell me what you’ve been up to?”

Noelle twirled an end of her hair and stared at him. She probably could tell Connor. He was a pretty standup guy, as far as elves went, but he also had a flair for dramatic panic. He’d have her blood pressure so high that the heartbeats practically overlapped.

“Eh, maybe later,” she said.

“Aww, shucks. Where’s Jenny? I haven’t seen her in a couple of days.”

“Oh, you haven’t?” Nice guy though he was, a bit of coyness was called for with Connor. He carried a little flame for Jenny. Jenny was oblivious. Noelle tended to prefer that she maintain that state. She wouldn’t be able to bear seeing her friend getting her heart broken, and certainly not by the son of the single most antagonistic guard of the late king. If his father hadn’t been dead, Noelle might have subdued Connor at first sight two years ago and asked questions later.

She made a dismissive gesture and handed Connor five bucks for his effort. The cab approached. “Oh, you know. Busy time of year. Trying to get everything buckled down before winter.”

“Yeah, I know what that’s like.” He saluted her with the cash. “I might move in with my brother for winter. Hate living with that guy. You’d think after all these years he’d be more accustomed to indoor plumbing. Maybe flushing consistently is always going to be outside of his skill set.”

Noelle curled her lip.

Connor shrugged. “Now you see what I mean.”

Noelle waved goodbye to him, nodded discreetly to her angelic shadow, and headed for the cab.

The shadow followed.

“Go away,” she muttered low as she climbed in.

“Not until I’ve completed my task.” Tarik squeezed into the backseat beside her and shut the door.

The driver’s eyes suddenly went very large and very round in the rearview mirror.

She imagined what he must have been seeing. A guy in a duster coat who was over seven feet tall and who had irises a color that eyes didn’t come in, dreadlocks down to his ass, and who shifted uncomfortably as though he was had a big fucking sword and wings on his back.

Because he did.

Noelle pinched the back of her sore neck and groaned. “Head toward North Las Vegas,” she said. “I’ll tip you better if you don’t slam repeatedly on the brakes. I’ll tip you best if you don’t talk.”

“Sure thing.” The driver got them moving.

Noelle crossed her legs away from Tarik and massaged her temples. “You really don’t need to follow me.”

“I should see where you live.”

“You could ask.”

“Easier if I see.”

“And then what?”

“And then I’ll know. Coming will be easier.”

She let her eyes close and pulled in a bracing breath. He meant he could randomly pop in via the angel way after he’d set a foot onto the property once. She didn’t try to understand the nuances of angel travel. There were many facts of nature she simply wasn’t equipped to know, and she was fine with that.

“And I’d like to know what happened,” he said.

“Here we go again,” she muttered. “Why don’t you ask your friend?”

“I’d like to hear your side.”

“Why?”

“I know Tamatsu. I believe he tells me the truth the best he can, but I also believe the truth comes in many different shades.”

“Why do you care?”

“Because he’s my friend. Would you not do the same for Jenny? Would you not query any associate capable of harassing her?”

“Oh, so I’m harassing, am I?”

“You know what I mean. Don’t get distracted by the vocabulary.”

“Yes, I know what you mean, and, yes, I regularly vet Jenny’s associates. For the most part, she can take care of herself, I guess, but she’s got a knack for picking the exact sorts who’d take advantage of her.”

“Clarissa insinuated as much earlier.”

“Did she?”

Tarik grunted. “She has a very good memory, your queen.”

“Ironic that her mate has no memory at all, then.”

Yet again, he grunted.

“Tarik, I don’t really know if there’s much of a story there. Maybe I thought there was more between us than he did. No one ever said these things had to be two-sided when one of the parties isn’t …” She flitted her gaze to the cabbie and then back. “Like me.”

He nodded, and didn’t say anything else until after the cabbie had deposited them in front of her townhouse.

She watched the cab drive off, then looked to Tarik, and then her front door. She got moving. Knowing her luck, the combination of full-coverage foundation and ectogoop had created an acne flare-up rash. She’d have to pull out the big guns for it. Acid peels were an aging elf’s best friend.

“We don’t … love the same way your kind does,” Tarik said after a minute.

Noelle stilled her key in front of the lock. “What do you mean?”

“We’re creatures of extreme.”

“Meaning?” She slid the key in and turned.

“Meaning emotion doesn’t come easily to us. We don’t feel unless we feel strongly.”

“How is that possible?”

Elves felt everything strongly … or at least, that seemed to be the case to Noelle. They held grudges for so long because fae feelings were wild and raw by default.

“The state tends to keep us neutral.” He followed her across the threshold. Like a good sentry who knew that grungy boots didn’t play nicely with white carpet, he waited on the foyer’s hardwood floor.

“Oh. Well, I suppose that makes sense, then. Appreciate knowing that I’m thought of neutrally by someone I loved.” She bounded up the stairs.

“I do believe he felt for you, Noelle,” he called after her.

“Yes. Anger, I’m sure. And maybe some lust.” She set her bag on the dresser and avoided her reflection, choosing to pivot right away to her closet. “Lots of lust.”

At the creaking of the floorboards against substantial weight, she poked her head out of the walk-in.

Tarik, in socked feet, leaned against the doorframe of her bedroom.

She was lucky the maid had visited while she was away, otherwise the guy might have had a glimpse of her indecency.

“You believe you are attached to him,” he said.

“I’m sure in your obviously long acquaintance to Clarissa, she’s explained to you how elf bonds work.”

“No, but I know of them all the same. I hadn’t considered that was what Tamatsu was dealing with. He was rather vague on details, or perhaps he didn’t know.”

“I don’t think he did. I don’t know if it matters, anyway.”

Noelle pulled back into the closet and divested herself of her ruined pantyhose.

“I wouldn’t bother if I didn’t believe you.”

… if I didn’t believe you.

She had to replay the words in her head twice before they made any semblance of sense to her. “Wait. What did you say?” She poked her head out of the closet.

He shrugged elegantly. “If I didn’t think you were being truthful about belonging to him, I wouldn’t be here right now. I’m here to learn what I can do to make him come.”

Noelle pinched up a bit of flesh on her forearm and squeezed hard.

It hurt.

Not a dream.

“Gods,” she whispered, and then said louder, “What you can do is wait for hell to freeze over, perhaps. I think you’ve forgotten what I took from him.”

Tarik made a dismissive flick of his hand. “Merely an obstacle. We’ve certainly overcome worse in our time walking amongst men.”

“You wouldn’t care if I were with him?”

“Of course I would care. I am simply coming to suspect that there may be mutually beneficial aspects to your partnering. He must have been attracted to you for some reason.”

She cocked her head at his condescending tone.

“You know what I mean, elf. How did you meet? What were you doing at the time?”

“If you’re asking if I rolled onto him mid-orgy, the answer is no. My horse had run off because he’d spooked it. Didn’t take me long to figure out what he was.”

“And then what?”

“I seem to remember a lot of long walks. A lot of comparing of swords and knives. A lot of laughing.”

The laughing had been her favorite part of their time together, because for the first time in her life, she’d truly believed that someone’s amusement wasn’t at her expense. She didn’t have to try to tamp down her humorous side at the expense of being taken seriously when she needed to be. He’d always taken her seriously.

“So you didn’t jump right into bed with him?”

“If I were a hundred years younger, I’d find this conversation entirely too scandalous. Even now, you’re toeing the line, guy.”

He put his hands up in concession. “Fair. I only query because we all have our vices, we Fallen ones. At the time of your meeting, he hadn’t been practicing abstention. If he hungered, he sated himself. Apparently, he … waited with you.”

“Waited? What are you getting at, Tarik?”

The angel didn’t respond. He nodded curtly and, in one of those spectacularly blinding flashes, disappeared from her boudoir.

“I hate when they do that.”

She stepped into the closet in search of her mother’s journal before she could forget. With all the recent revelations scraping for attention in her brain, it was easier than ever to forget.