- Chapter Four -

Zoe

The city looked and felt different when you were whipping through it. No car or subway could make traveling feel like flying, not here. LA was the king of traffic jams. Even in the late hours, when people were just starting their bar-crawls or ending them, the roads were stuffed. Speed was a mere dream.

But not now. Not with the metal monster screaming between my thighs.

I hadn't ridden a bike in over a month. Reese had let me ride behind him—just like this—when we'd dated.

I refused to share anything with that asshole ever again.

Huck turned sharply, throwing me against his broad middle. Clinging so tight I worried I would snap his ribs, I ducked my forehead behind his shoulder. The cold air was invigorating, but it burned the tip of my nose.

Is this okay? My skin on his jacket, my arms holding him in a vice... I was doing exactly what I'd promised myself I wouldn't. He was amazing in there tonight. Fast, powerful.

Magnetic.

Shuddering, I clenched my eyes shut. But Reese was, too, and I know how that ended. Huck was too similar to my ex. The epitome of what made my thighs shiver. That fucking desire, though, it had screwed me over. Huxton was everything I did not need in my life. I'd been hurt, I was paying for my bad judgment—my stupid decision to believe in a man who had back-stabbed me.

When cocky assholes didn't get what they wanted from you, they abandoned you.

Huck was the same breed.

He said he didn't want anything from me.

The memory of him, standing so close and crushing me against his Harley... it was heart stopping. I ached to believe him. Wouldn't that be amazing, a bad boy who was altruistic?

Impossible.

Huck was sweet with words, sweeter with his smiles and wicked eyes. I had to learn to tell the difference between my intuition and the heat that melted my pussy. Lust wasn't the meter to judge people by. It couldn't be.

Even if that would make everything so much simpler.

The bike shifted fast; I clutched on, gasping. Through the leather that brushed my skin and tickled me with its strong scent, there was a rhythm. A soft, but wild beat that pushed into my chest and matched my own.

His heartbeat. It became my focus.

I wanted to keep my eyes closed, to just listen and feel him. As long as we rode, we could exist in this simple bubble and I wouldn't need to worry about tomorrow. Not an hour from now, not days or weeks. No future fights... no worries about Nehro or how much Huck was threatening to break my logic into tiny pieces.

Here, I could hug him and pretend this was it. This was my life.

But no. My life wasn't simple and it certainly wasn't this.

I didn't live far, I'd purposefully looked for an apartment near the fighting ring after I'd split with Reese. No car, no ex's motorcycle, I needed an easy path to the subway to reach a destination I'd be stuck with for the next ten years, minimum.

Eliza's ad for a roommate had been serendipitous.

Now, I sort of hated how fast we rumbled down the quiet street, slowing in front of the familiar house. The Christmas lights blinked, waving at me mockingly. Yes, hello, I mused to myself. Merry Christmas. Go fuck yourself.

The engine died abruptly, telling me the dream was over. “We're here,” Huck said, twisting to watch me. Like water, I spilled away from him, creating as much distance as I could on that bike seat.

His heat radiated over my arms and stomach. I felt him, praying the sensation would linger until I could slide into my bed and take care of the pressure in my lower belly. Yeah, I hated how much I hungered for this trouble-maker, but I was only human. Huck had excited me at my party, he'd driven me higher at the Dog House. The ride home had cinched it.

Hate him or not, he'd haunt me until I got myself off.

Maybe even beyond that.

Whatever. It was my own head, it didn't have the same risk as actually doing something with the man in front of me.

Blankets and familiar fingers were safe.

Lonely.

Huck was staring at me expectantly. I sat up, adjusted my jacket. “Right. Thanks for the ride.”

“My pleasure.”

I think he meant it. At least, I wanted him to.

Stop it, Zoe. Stop being crazy. Swallowing the lump that had crystallized in my throat, I slid off the motorcycle. My legs were numb, I moved too fast. Stumbling, I grabbed for the rear tire to steady my balance.

Huxton caught me first, one strong arm around my middle to keep me standing. “Easy there. You alright?”

“I'm fine, really.” His fingers dug into my hip. Shit, okay, I was too aware of each solid fingertip. I was not fine at all. “Just lost my balance.”

His grin slid high on one corner. “If I didn't know better, I'd swear you were drunk.”

In a sense, I was. He fogged my brain and stole my strength, how different was that from overdosing on alcohol?

More fiercely than I needed to, I pulled out of his grip. He let me go, and I knew he let me go. He was more than capable of holding me where he wanted. His muscles were iron and stone.

Forcing my nerves to behave, I stared him in the eye. “Thanks for tonight. All of it. If you hadn't shown up, I would have been...” Fucking Nehro or whoever else he demanded. Spreading my legs to pay off that fucking loan. “In trouble.” I couldn't say the truth. It wasn't Huck's problem, and I had no plans to change that.

“Everyone gets into trouble.” Shrugging, he searched in his pocket. I didn't see his other hand coming. His reach was long, he managed to catch me by the wrist and pull me to him from where he sat on the bike.

The speed left me disoriented. His palm was silk, its strength undeniable. I bumped his knee, my focus rolling upward. I'd never met someone with eyes so green. The black centers tugged at me, whispered for me to get lost in them and never break free.

Okay. This was going to be a problem.

This was why I had to get away from Huck.

But I didn't. Not right then. Instead, I hung on like a fly trapped in a web and waited for whatever he was about to do. I won't pretend I didn't stare at his lips, those teasing teeth that had touched me on Eliza's bed.

I knew how his cock felt, sliding over my cunt. I knew that. Eliza's gift to me had been a curse. I couldn't let myself be around this man. He'd wear me down, and eventually, leave me broken. Used.

Forgotten.

And it was a sign of how fucking pathetic I was that, knowing all of this, I still waited with bated breath for him to finish what he'd started.

Lifting my wrist, he pressed something cool and flat into my palm. When I twitched but didn't react further, he closed my fingers around it. “Here, you left the other one back in that alley.”

Blinking, I opened my hand and stared at the new, crisp business card. Huck's card. “I told you,” I whispered, wishing my voice was stronger. “I'm not calling you for help again.”

“What you call me for is up to you.” Bending close, he tapped the surface of the card. “I do more than just fight muscle-bound men. Personally, I prefer wrestling with sweeter things.”

Withdrawing his hand, he brushed his fingers over my wrist so lightly it had to be intentional. The buttery tingles he left in his wake shook me to my core.

I was dazed and sluggish, until an electric jolt went to my brain and warned me what I was thinking. I want to kiss him. I looked from his lips to his eyes. Oh god, he wants to kiss me, too.

Fuck. No. I couldn't do this. It'd be too easy. Ruining my already fragile future should never be so easy.

With every fiber arguing against me, I stepped backwards. Huck didn't flinch, but the glow in his stare smoldered away. “I—okay. Alright. I need to go.” Unsure what else to do, I lifted my arm and gave a lame wave.

Furrowing his brow, Huxton mimicked me. His smile stretched like an elastic. “Good night, Zoe. See you soon.”

See you soon. Why did he sound so sure of that? Saying nothing, I spun around and walked like a zombie to the front door. I fit in better with Halloween, as pale and hollow-eyed as I was. The Santa on the door beamed at me. I almost ripped it off.

It took everything I had not to look back. I couldn't do it. If I saw him or how he was watching me, I'd crumble. Fuck. I was pathetic.

Jingling the door open, I escaped into the protection of the house. I had walls between me and him; real, actual walls.

Leaning on the door, I took a giant breath and slid to the floor. My knees went to my chest, my skull tapping against the wood behind me. I was free, and still, I felt trapped.

What is wrong with me? I was as bad as the people who kept playing the lottery until they went broke, hoping one day they wouldn't waste their money, that they'd hit the jackpot. I'd spent my whole life throwing myself away. Guy after guy, so many wild adventures and draining men.

It was what I'd always been drawn to.

It was no better than a gambling addiction.

Not once had one of these guys—for all their sexy smiles or confident boasts—been good for me. They'd stolen a part of my soul with every encounter.

Why, knowing that, did I expect Huck to be different?

Yup. I'm stupid and crazy. This confirms it. Sitting up, I went to smooth my hair. In my hand, I found the sharp corner of his card.

Lifting it high, I read the words and stifled a bitter laugh.

Muscle for hire. Yet, he kept implying he'd like to do more for me than violently swipe aside a man in a ring.

Frowning, I turned the little rectangle, looked at every side of it. Huxton was a stripper, but the card didn't say that. Not openly.

How had Eliza known, then?

Buzzing with wonder, I pushed myself to my feet. Hanging my coat and purse up, I tip-toed down the hall to my bedroom. I didn't want to wake Eliza, even if I had questions. I was too tired to deal with her scolding me about not coming back for my birthday party.

In a way, it wasn't like I'd made her waste her money. She'd wanted me to be entertained by Huck. Well, I'd spent a good chunk of my night with him.

Wasn't that sort of close, at least in spirit?

Shutting my door, I fell onto my bed with a giant groan. Face first, not looking, I kicked my shoes off. They thumped to the floor, bouncing away. The blanket was cool on my forehead. That was good, because my head was so hot I was sure I was running a fever.

This had been a very long day for me. My heart had rattled around uneasily when Eliza had organized the party. I wanted to get away from alcohol and loud music and bad decisions. She'd just wanted to lift my spirits.

I'd appreciated the effort. After leaving Reese, I'd depressingly realized that I was left with no friends. He'd been all I had, I'd gotten so wrapped up in him and his bullshit—and mine.

His friends had remained just that; his. I'd been alone.

Eliza was sweet, and also too good at prying information from me. When checking out the house in my rental hunt, she'd sat me down, poured me a drink—ignoring my protests—and insisted that she get to know me.

She'd claimed it was all routine roommate stuff. Five drinks in, and I'd spilled the beans about Reese. I'm a sloppy drunk. I'm not proud of it.

Maybe she sympathized, maybe she could relate. I still wasn't sure where her giant heart came from. That day, she'd offered me the room and lowered the rent so that my paltry waitress job would let me live here.

LA was expensive, it drained my funds constantly. I'd have left if I could have. Frankly, between what I owed to Nehro and what I could barely make on my own, escape was impossible.

But money wasn't the only reason.

Money had gotten me in trouble. It was my guilt that kept me locked in this place.

Sighing, I shoved the bitter thoughts aside. I'd been in this mindset too long, too many nights. My life sucked, it wasn't new to me.

I was determined to fix it. I'd spent my years wasting away in clubs and at parties and with scummy men.

I was done with all of that.

Well, once I clear my debt... THEN I'll be done with all of that. Until then, I'd always be forced to interact with Nehro—and Reese.

Flopping onto my back, I stared at the ceiling and smoothed the knots from my windswept hair. The tangles that had been caused by the wickedly liberating motorcycle ride.

His motorcycle.

Huxton, why are you so firmly in my head? Tapping my temple, I chuckled. Get out. Go back to wherever you came from. Where did he come from? The man was an enticing mystery.

A mystery you are not about to solve, I reminded myself. He fit the picture of a guy with problems. I was no longer in the business of trying to fix broken men.

Broken, damaged, sexy fucking men.

Dammit.

Running my fingers over my collar bone, down to my stomach, I felt the ghost of his warmth. If I shut my eyes, I could smell the leather and musk of his aroma. Huck couldn't be around me. I was too raw still, not ready to fight my desires.

He'd given me his card... but I would never call him again.

Unlike others, I could keep some promises. I was sure of that.

Still, I mused, tracing my own bare thigh under my dress. He was something else. The way he moved, fuck. The way he felt, pressing between my thighs. Pushing my knees apart, I relived the lap-dance he'd given me.

His methods were intense. He acted the whole time like he knew what he was doing to me. Maybe he had. Maybe he'd read every twitch and single breath I'd made, used it to make me crumble into shivering paste.

His hands, his lips, his god damn thick cock.

I'd hungered to feel it doing more than grazing over my panties.

If that asshole—Kit—hadn't shown up, would we have broken down and gone for it? I kept assuming it was me who'd decide if we went all the way. What if Huxton hadn't been planning that? If I'd yanked my panties aside and begged him to fuck me, could he have said no?

Inching my fingers down to the junction of my legs, I tugged at my underwear. No. He wouldn't have denied me. Maybe he'd have teased me, made me beg, but...

He'd been so rock hard. No way he'd have resisted.

Closing my eyes, I watched the colors behind my eyelids. Reds and yellows pulsed, reminding me of his tattoos. I had such a fucking weakness for tattoos. His were everywhere, even his hands and neck. A guy like that feared nothing. He didn't care if no one would hire him because of such overt visuals.

Did he really make his money stripping?

And protecting people like me?

Shivering, I thought about his strength. Outlining my pussy, I slid my panties lower. I was already wet, though not as soaked as I'd been when Huck had gyrated his erection against me.

Thinking about him... doing this... it was dangerous. A really fucking bad idea. I'll never see him again. It'll be fine. Plus, I hadn't gotten laid in over a month. My body was starving.

Rubbing myself softly, I pictured his smile. That cocky grin. I hated it and loved it. The way it warmed me was unfair. He was a shot of whiskey in front of a recovering alcoholic. I wanted to slurp him down, to fill myself with him and forget the reasons I shouldn't.

A moan escaped me, fingers sliding easily over my swollen clit. So much pressure, so much heat. I was going crazy with my need for release. There was tension in every limb. It spread lower, controlling my stomach, reaching into my cunt and stoking my fires.

My fingers weren't the same as a cock—any cock.

His cock.

It had felt amazing, firm and fat and cruel. If he'd kept rubbing on me, I could have gotten myself off just from that.

Panting heavily, I made small circles, teasing my clit. Dipping two fingers inside, I curled them, imagined they were his. It was a poor imitation, but it worked.

Grinding onto my own palm, feeling his phantom lips on my throat, I moaned. Tingling down to my toes, I squeezed around my fingers, wriggled them quicker. Unable to wait any longer, I slid free and thumbed my sensitive button.

His voice sank into my skull, filled the cracks of my brain. Inhaling, I smelled him—visualized him—and lost it. Wicked vibrations took over. My veins pulsed with not just blood, but electric need. Flexing with orgasm, I covered my mouth to muffle the noise.

The last thing I wanted was to wake up Eliza.

Trembling, laying in my sweat, I enjoyed the spasms of the lingering release. Liquid coated my inner thighs. I felt how wet I was, shoving my panties off my ankles and kicking them aside. They would be useless.

What I really needed was a shower.

A god damn, cold as ice shower.

Closing my eyes, I put a pillow over my face and laughed bitterly.

My life was a mess.

I was a mess.

And yet, as I swaddled myself in the not-innocent glow of climax and greed, I didn't care. I had let myself enjoy something that I shouldn't have. I'd gotten off to the existence of a man that rebelled against my common sense.

Falling asleep with my hand still resting between my thighs...

I just didn't care.

Happy birthday to me.

Rubbing my eyes, I growled at the rays of sunlight poking at my face. My window blinds were down, but that wasn't enough to make a difference. The sunny state of California was the enemy of late morning sleepers.

It took a moment for my body to come alive. I felt the thumping in my skull, a sign I'd slept too late and not late enough. When blood hit my limbs, I shifted, realized my hand was still cupping my pussy.

Blushing at the memory of what I'd done, I forced myself to sit up. Going to sleep with the sinful dream of Huxton in my head wasn't exactly conductive to my current plans. It's fine, no one knows but me. That wasn't much better. I was a judgmental jerk to myself already.

Yawning, cracking my back, I threw my dress into my laundry basket. Changing into a soft, light-blue shirt, I grabbed a fresh pair of underwear, then some shorts, and slid them on. A quick check of my phone, searching for messages, I stuck it in my pocket.

Wrapping a long cardigan around myself, I crept into the hallway. The wood floor was cool under my feet. “Eliza?” I called, traipsing into the kitchen. I didn't see her. The microwave claimed it was already noon. Had I actually slept that late? “Eliza, are you here?”

Frowning at her absence, I grabbed an apple from the fridge. She'd left the windows open, the oddly warm December air floating inside the apartment. With it, I caught the sound of a voice.

Curious, I bit into the fruit and started walking. Was Eliza in the backyard? I didn't blame her, if she was. It looked incredibly nice outside, and I bet the green grass and flowers would look gorgeous.

Eliza was giving me a crazy deal on my rent. A room in a house like this was easily triple what she asked of me. While I didn't like hand-outs, I made up for it by cleaning and tidying up more than my share required. It was small, but it was what I could manage.

Down the hall, I came to the sliding glass doors. They led to the back patio and the in-ground pool, an extra perk. I loved swimming, and wished that it was turning summer instead of winter, now that I had access to a pool every day.

Pushing the door sideways, I stepped outside into the sun with my mouth partially full of apple. “Eliza?” I mumbled, her name wet and muffled. “Are you—”

I never finished my sentence. How could I, with the scene before me?

He stood there, a statue of shining flesh in the bright sunshine. Like Eliza, who was stretched out on a chair in just her pink bikini, Huxton was wearing nothing but a bathing suit, too. A simple pair of tight, black shorts; they clung to him, leaving little to the imagination.

Never mind that it was god damn 'winter' and they were tanning. I had bigger complaints to take up with the universe or whoever made things happen.

Why the hell was he here?

Eliza perked up, waving to me. “Zoe! There you are, good afternoon, sleepy-head!”

The apple in my mouth became dry sand.

Turning my way, Huck slid his sunglasses up his head. They perched in his shimmering hair, tufts poking out around the edges in a roguish way. How could Eliza recline so close to him and not melt like a Popsicle? “Mornin', beautiful,” he called to me.

I shot my eyes to my roommate. She hadn't reacted to his pet-name compliment. She looked relaxed, enjoying the sun that kept proving it was stronger than the expected grey of winter. Crossing one knee over the other, she stretched. “Get your suit on, come tan with us.”

Holding the apple like a weapon, I pointed it at Huxton. My voice was raspy, I was choking my mouthful of food down. “What is he doing here?” There was no softening of the accusation. Real, frustrated anger boiled up into my veins.

They shared a look, Eliza pouting. “Wow, rude. I invited him over.”

“Okay, but why?” Why would you call a stranger back here? I was aware of Huck watching me. I was fully clothed, but under his piercing greens, I felt exposed.

Recalling how I'd woken up with my hand buried in my pussy, I turned beet red. This was not how I wanted to start my day.

Shaking her chin, Eliza motioned up at Huck lazily. “Didn't I tell you? Huck and I go way back, we're old friends.”

Jagged lightning rattled my brain. “You're what?”

Huck laughed and said, “Friends. I hadn't seen her in awhile, though. I wanted to catch up with her after reconnecting yesterday.”

“I didn't know you two already knew each other.” Watching him standing over her as she reclined, her looking gorgeous and so fitting at his side, a flicker of sick heat made its way into my stomach. No, nope. Don't feel jealous. Don't be dumb.

Eliza pushed a fist to her cheek, smiling. “I definitely mentioned we knew each other. Remember, I had that old business card of his?”

“That's not the same as telling me you have a history.” What kind of history? Clenching my jaw, I bit into my apple. Eating was at least productive. Being silly and envious was not.

“You really didn't tell her?” Huck asked, shifting his weight to one side. The twist of his body made his abs pop, pulling me in helplessly. “What, are you ashamed of me?” Grinning, he lifted his hands in mock insult.

Laughing, Eliza jabbed him in the knee. “Stop. I just didn't want to go into it.” Her voice lowered, a meaning that went unsaid. Huxton nodded, all humor gone as they communicated with just their eyes.

Alright. Now I was suspicious.

Chomping so hard that the fruit shot juice into the air, I sat down by the edge of the pool. I had a lot to absorb. I'd thought Eliza had just contacted Huck when Kit had vanished from the radar. Well, now I understood how she knew what he did for a living. His card was vague, she knew the reality.

How had they met? Why didn't she want to go into it?

Sighing, I turned my apple in my hands, my appetite fading.

Plastic crinkled as Eliza shifted on the chair. “Anyway,” she said, “Now that you're awake, I can safely berate you.” Pointing, she wagged a finger. “Why the hell didn't you come back last night, Missy? Poor Huck had to entertain all our friends, and you weren't even here to take part in it.”

Her pretend anger made me smile. Being chastised helped clear the tension. “Sorry, sorry. I got called into work.” Bouncing a pointed look at Huck that said 'do not say a word' I pushed on. “You know how I need the money. I couldn't say no.”

“Alright. I guess that's a suitable excuse.” Wriggling her painted toes, she hopped up and headed for the door. “It's actually a little warm. I'll grab us some drinks.”

The second she'd shut the glass panel, I whipped my glare to Huck and arched an eyebrow. “Okay, so, when I kept telling you I wouldn't call you, you knew the entire time you'd end up running into me anyway. Didn't you?”

In the sun, his teeth glistened like polished ivory. “Pretty much, yeah.”

“You're a real piece of work.”

“Guilty as charged.” Chuckling, he swayed in my direction. I clutched my apple, feeling it give way under my harsh grip. “I'm sorry I didn't mention that Eliza and I were friends. Guess it never came up naturally.”

Peeking at the door, I looked for my roommate. I didn't see her. “I'm more bugged by Eliza not telling me than you. It's a little weird to get a lap-dance from her...” I trailed off. In the time I'd spent spying for her to return, Huxton had closed the gap.

His muscled legs were poised within reach. With the sun behind his head, Huck's face was cast in black oblivion. I felt the softness in his words, the way they rolled over me like velvet. “I'm Eliza's friend. Just her friend.”

Had I been so transparent? “I don't care if you're more than that.”

Lowering himself, Huxton balanced on his haunches, letting me see his face; that too proud grin. “I think you do care.”

My eyes narrowed. I willed my heart to stop trying to climb out of my throat. “Why would I care about that?”

He whispered, “Because you don't want to picture me with her. You want to imagine me with you.” His fingers scalded, resting on my cheek. Even though they never moved, I swear, his touch brushed me deep, cradling my core.

This man was carnal lust made real.

Summoning every bit of strength I had, I looked Huck in the eye. Then, slow and smooth, I rolled my gaze down to the shape of his cock in his swim-shorts. It was easy to see the outline, he had a semi-erection growing.

Focus. Fucking focus.

Lifting the apple, I waited until I was sure I had his attention. One more look at his bulge, and I bit into the fruit so violently, my teeth clipped together. Grinning smugly, I chewed and swallowed. “No, I don't think I want anything from you.”

In front of me, Huck changed. Emerald eyes became stone, his fingers on my face turned to barbed wire. Before I could do anything, he slid his palm down, over my throat. We both felt my jugular pulsing. “Liar,” he growled. Further he went, stroking a finger into the neck of my shirt, tugging.

Under the cloth, my nipples tightened into painful nubs. There was no hiding that, or how I breathed in like Huck was the only source of oxygen.

His teeth reminded me of fangs as he smirked. “Oh yes, you're quite the liar, babe. But that's fine. We all lie a little bit.”

Standing gracefully, he never took his hot stare off of me. Stroking himself once, he turned away and sat in a chair. Using his arm, he covered the sign of his excitement just as Eliza opened the door.

“I hope lemonade is fine,” she said, dancing over, hugging three glasses. “We should go shopping soon, Zoe. We're running low on groceries.”

I tore my attention from Huck, shaking myself, trying to remember what I'd been doing. “Huh?”

“Lemonade. Shopping.” Blinking, she handed me a glass. It was deliciously cold. I was tempted to pour it over myself, or to jump in the pool.

Instead, I looked down at the apple in my other hand. I dared to glance at Huck, not surprised to find him observing me. Tightening my jaw, I threw the core across the yard, letting it skid in the grass.

I wasn't hungry for fruit anymore.