Chapter Eleven
Izzy took a deep breath before gripping the banister to head downstairs. The shower and mental pep talk had done little to relieve the twisty feeling in her stomach. She had to put on a show and make Derek’s family believe in their relationship because Silver Acres had called while she was changing into clean clothes. For the first time in her life, she had bounced a check. Izzy was always so meticulous with money, but the extra shopping that day with Derek must have put her over the edge, and now she had to beg them to give her a few more days on Gram’s rent. Money had been tight before, but she’d never been rendered broke.
As it stood, it seemed wrong and a little embarrassing to take Derek’s money now. She’d nearly slept with him, and they’d formed a friendship, maybe even a relationship. How could she let him pay her after all this? And if she told him she was utterly and completely broke, he might think she was just using him for his money.
Full-bodied laughter echoed from the parlor as she placed her foot on the final step. She pulled in a breath and forced her shoulders to relax. Here goes nothing.
The glow from the open parlor door illuminated the dim hallway, and she followed the light.
“There she is.” Derek, who was standing in the middle of the room, turned to smile at her. He walked over, gripped her hand, and planted a kiss on her cheek. “I was just telling them how we visited your grandmother the other day.”
A winter wonderland of guilt rolled over her. She’d gotten Gram mixed up in this lie, too, and it didn’t sit well.
“She’s a very special lady.” Izzy directed the statement at Janet and her husband, who stared at her expectantly. They were both sitting on the couch, and Mary lounged by the fire, fiddling around on her cell phone.
“Sit down.” Janet motioned with her hand to the empty love seat across from the couch. “We want to know all about you.”
Despite Janet’s smile, Izzy’s throat tightened. So, this was what it felt like to be on trial. Derek rubbed her palm with his thumb, a quick gesture of encouragement no one else could see. It bolstered her confidence slightly, to know they were in this together. She sat on the other couch and sank into the buttery-soft leather. Atticus got up from his spot in the corner of the room to flop down at her feet. The weight of his body on her toes did more to comfort.
“Do your parents live close by, Izzy?” Janet said over the Bloody Mary she was sipping. It was a bit early for a drink, but to each their own. Maybe the alcohol would make Izzy and Derek’s relationship more believable. Derek’s father, Paul, held a mug of coffee between both hands and crossed his left ankle over his knee.
“My mother lives in Naples, Florida, so it’s just Gram and me up here.” If only her bright tone ended the questions about her family, it would be easier to relax. As soon as she found an opening to deflect questions to Derek, she’d shamelessly take it.
“Oh, Naples is just lovely. It must be so nice for you to visit her and be around all the beaches and boutiques.” A fleck of red tomato juice had clung to Janet’s cheek, and Izzy couldn’t seem to take her eyes off it. Her mother had never invited her to visit, and Izzy hadn’t thought of why until now. She twisted the simple silver necklace she wore between her fingers. She had never even stepped foot in Naples.
“And what about your father?” Janet pressed.
Izzy rubbed the dog’s back with her foot, more for her comfort than his. “He’s not in the picture,” she said quickly.
Paul leaned forward and smiled at Izzy. “Janet’s training to be a clinical investigator.” Everyone laughed except Janet.
“I’m just trying to get to know her. That’s all.” Janet jabbed Paul with a light elbow to the ribs. Did she see through the act already, or was she just naturally nosey? The tension in the room was suddenly as thick as an unwanted holiday fruitcake.
“I think those cookies are ready to pop in the oven. Excuse me.” Every eye was on her as she got up from the couch and exited the room. She released the pent-up breath she’d been holding the second she reached the safety of the quiet foyer. If Janet was so insistent on Derek settling down, why was she drilling her? Insecurities swirled around her. Because you’re not good enough. Maybe Derek’s stepmom had expected more, and she didn’t live up to the standard. Or was it Izzy’s lack of confidence that made her an easy target? It was going to be a long two days if she didn’t toughen up and show some backbone. If only she could act as easily as her gram, she’d breeze through Janet’s questions with confidence and sass.
In the kitchen, she took the dough out of the fridge and rolled it out on the island. It was good to do something with her hands to lessen the nerves flip-flopping in her belly. She flattened the dough in quick jerks and gritted her teeth. Tonight, before Christmas Eve dinner, she’d put on the lovely lace dress Derek bought, put on some makeup, and pull out all the stops. She’d worked way too hard the past two weeks to see it go up in flames. She’d never see these people again after tomorrow. It was time to put on a show. A flicker in the doorway caught her eye, and she glanced up. Mary stood there. Her dark glossy hair hung to her shoulders and covered some of her face. Izzy’s hands were red from pressing down on the rolling pin so hard. She must look like a certified lunatic, pounding the dough with a vengeance on the table.
“Can I help cut shapes?” Mary asked softly and shuffled forward in her socked feet.
“I’d love the help. I didn’t think to cut down the recipe, and there’s a lot of dough here,” Izzy said and pulled out cookie cutters she’d found while searching the kitchen. “Looks like we have stars, snowmen, and reindeer.” She laid the shapes on the table for Mary to choose. She was a cute girl with almond-shaped eyes and golden skin. Mary stood side by side with Izzy, chose the reindeer, and started pressing it through the dough.
“I hid in my room for, like, days after Janet adopted me. She can be pretty, um, intense,” Mary whispered. “She’s not bad, though. Besides, she’s been talking about meeting you nonstop.”
“Maybe I’m not what she was expecting.” Jeez, Izzy. This isn’t Dr. Phil. It’s a little girl who’s way too well-spoken and adult for her age.
“It’s just, you know. You’re the first woman Derek’s liked. Ever. Janet wants everyone to be happy so bad, she gets a little wacky.”
Izzy chuckled. Maybe she should give Janet a little slack. People showed their insecurities in different ways. Izzy had done some serious online sleuthing when Mr. Johnson had started dating Gram. She could be open and honest about herself to Derek’s family. She had nothing to hide or be embarrassed by—except lying about her relationship with Derek, of course. She’d never done something quite so deceitful in her entire life. The last time she’d told a lie had been to Gram when she’d come home from college the weekend after her breakup. It had been way too humiliating to tell her what had happened with Bret. Instead, she’d told her she’d broken it off to focus on her studies.
Mary’s giggle broke Izzy out of her thoughts. “What did the dough do to you?” Mary pushed a snowman into the mixture and peeled off the perfect shape.
Izzy looked down. She’d rolled the dough on her side paper thin. She blew out a breath entangled with a short laugh. “I guess I’m more wound-up than I thought. I want this to be the perfect holiday, for you guys and Derek, too.”
Mary looked at her for a moment, then smiled. “I’m glad someone finally loves Derek like we do. He can be a little grouchy, you know.” They both laughed.
Did Izzy love Derek, or was she caught up in the fantasy? The castle, the dashing looks, the spirit of the holidays swarming in the air, those kisses that lit her soul on fire. It wasn’t so cut and dry for her. When she was committed to something, it was 100 percent. Had she found the one she’d dreamed of her entire life in Derek? Or was it just that—a dream that would evaporate in less than two days, no matter how hard she fought to hold on to the edges of it?
“Sounds like a regular henhouse in here.” Derek stood in the doorway, and a jolt of electricity spiraled through her at the sight of him. Her hands had found the hard body beneath his shirt less than an hour ago, and might find more tonight if she decided to meet him in his bedroom. She absently pushed down on the cookie cutter, and a sharp pain bit through the tip of her finger. She jerked back and glanced at the red drops beating down on the dough. Derek brows shot up and rushed to her side.
“I shouldn’t have startled you,” he said, picking up her hand and inspecting the cut. If he minded the blood that dripped onto his skin, it didn’t show. “Come to the bathroom. We’ll get you a Band-Aid.”
Derek gripped her wrist with one hand, put the other on her shoulder, and led her out of the kitchen toward the foyer powder room. Janet and Paul were just coming out of the parlor. Derek’s stepmom covered her mouth at the sight of the blood.
“Oh dear, what happened?” Janet turned pale.
“Another kitchen incident,” Izzy said. Atticus lumbered down the hall to see what all the fuss was about.
“Maybe Janet and I should throw dinner in the oven. We don’t want you two to have another one of those incidents over a hot stove.” Paul’s eyes twinkled, and he squeezed Janet’s shoulder. Derek’s father had taken a brave step to open his heart again after his hopes and dreams had been dashed. Would Derek ever be ready to do the same?
“Everything is prepped and in the fridge,” Derek said before Izzy could protest.
He pulled her into the bathroom, shut the door behind them, and started fishing through the vanity cabinet.
“I wanted them to put their feet up and relax. That’s what I’m here for, after all,” she said, and Derek turned to her with a box gripped in his hand.
“Is it?” Derek’s eyes had darkened. They looked nearly black as he searched her face. The air grew heavy in the space between them, thick with unspoken wants and needs. How did she tell him it meant more but she still desperately needed the paycheck he was offering? It not only sounded pathetic, but it also sounded like a money grab. As if he’d picked up on her thoughts, he asked, “Is it all about the paycheck for you?”
Izzy looked down at her hand. The blood had clotted and was starting to dry on her skin. She couldn’t meet his eyes. “I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t important. I’m in a tight spot, and it’s so embarrassing. But I’d be a liar to say that’s all it’s about.”
“There’s nothing embarrassing about trying to provide for your family.” He lifted her chin. “Just know you’re not the employee anymore. I want you here. I can’t make any promises for tomorrow. I’m not sure what I’m capable of offering. So, for today, let’s just be, okay?”
Izzy nodded. “I can do that.” Even as she said it, there was a sinking in her heart. Was he not capable of offering more, or just not capable of offering more to her? She wasn’t fooled by his hard outer shell. She’d witnessed him put his life on the line for his dog and carry shopping bags for an old woman. Derek had compassion to give whether he wanted to or not.
His warm hand on hers sent a flurry of tingles through her, like cold flakes of snow on bare skin. He pulled her toward the sink and turned on the tap.
“Let’s get you cleaned up.” His voice was quiet, and she let him hold her finger under the cool water, dry it off, and wrap the Band-Aid around the cut.
“Don’t let my family get to you. Just be Izzy.” He kissed the bridge of her nose. If only he knew how hard she was trying—and maybe that was the problem.
When they went back into the kitchen, Janet rounded the counter top and squeezed Izzy into a hug.
“I’m so sorry if I upset you, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to pry into your life. Sometimes I get a little overzealous, but don’t think for a second we’re not thrilled Derek’s settling down.”
She’d taken their faux relationship and locked it down with a ball and chain rather quickly. Now she could understand why Derek was so desperate to have her play live-in girlfriend.
“Thank you,” Izzy said to Janet, and she meant it. Some of the tension she was holding ebbed.
“The good news is, now we only have to decorate half the cookies before we eat them,” Mary said, earning smiles all around. Maybe this wouldn’t be as terrible as she thought. Izzy had always been her own worst enemy. The afternoon took a turn for the better when they gathered around the fire to play board games with a few glasses of wine, cheese, and fruit. She learned Derek was a sore loser, and his childish pout made her heart flutter as she laughed at him with the rest of his family. Afterward, she put the roast and the ham in one oven, and Janet put the prepped casserole dishes into the other. She made Derek promise to keep a close eye on everything and went up to her room to change.
It had been a long time since she’d swiped mascara over her lashes and put blush on her cheeks. She took some extra time and care for the occasion and was surprised when she looked in the mirror. Her brown eyes looked nearly gold, and her fair skin had a peaches-and-cream glow. Was it Derek who put the sparkle in her eyes and the light into her skin? Izzy twisted her long curls to the right side of her face and fastened them there before spreading some scented cream on her skin.
She still hadn’t fully made up her mind about going to Derek’s room when the night was over. Her heart was urging her to take this leap of faith, but her mind was telling her to put her silly fantasies aside.
She slid the pure white dress off the hanger and over her head. Izzy looked in the mirror, and her breath caught. She felt beautiful for the first time she could remember. She was going to bottle the feeling and open it someday when her memory of this Christmas Eve began to fade.
Izzy took one final glance in the mirror. She knew what she wanted this Christmas Eve, and it was Derek. She slid open a drawer, clutched the ornament she’d saved for Derek in her palm, and closed the door to her room. Originally, the pickle was supposed to lead Derek to the snow globe she’d bought at the mall, but she had something else in mind.