Chapter 2

 

Pain. So much pain and the lights. People talking. Kiley cringed as she was poked and prodded. What were they doing to her? She had to stop them. She’d heard of these men drugging people and kidnapping them. Kiley had to fight. She lashed out, kicking and screaming, praying someone would hear her and save her.

Then there was bliss, quiet, safe, bliss. But it didn’t last long and the noise grew loud again. She flinched. Where was she? What happened? More lights and people touching her.

And a man’s voice…calm but firm, trying to speak to her. Was it Ned? She fought even harder to get away from him, but no…no, it wasn’t Ned. He wasn’t this strong, and his voice wasn’t so comforting. She sagged against the bed again and let the darkness come. It washed over her in waves, dulling her senses and minimizing the pain coursing through her body. She floated in that state of in between, not caring if she woke up. She’d be better off if she didn’t wake up. No more living with the guilt or the fear. Nothing to worry about at all.

Only the darkness.

A quiet beeping filled her mind, pulling her from the numb abyss. She blinked, opening her eyes slowly. Panic set in first, and she clutched at the bed hard, but when her vision cleared, she forced her breathing to slow as she glanced at her surroundings. This was not Ned’s place, or some creepy warehouse. She was in a hospital room. An IV was in her arm, and she was alone in a room. The door was closed, but she heard the bustle of a hospital outside it. The blinds were cracked open. Night time. How long had she been there?

The pain hit her all at once as her mind caught up with what had happened to her. She winced when she tried to move in the bed. Her head throbbed and her sides ached, but her thigh burned the worst. She lifted the sheet and moved aside the gown and saw a bandage covering her whole right thigh. She tried to remember what had happened, but the moment she did, a frightened whimper escaped her lips and she dropped the sheet.

The knife. The bastard held a knife to her throat…and they’d…they’d carved into her leg…and…and…

She gulped, waiting for any pain to seep out from between her legs, but there was nothing. Had they left her alone in that regard? Praying she hadn’t been raped by those bastards, too, she drew the sheets carefully from her bed, but she was hooked up to more than only an IV. How long had she been in the hospital? Looking around, she found the call button for a nurse and covered herself with the sheets while she waited. Her room was chilly and she shivered, forcing her eyes to stay open though they wanted to close again.

The longer she waited, the more glimpses of memories came back to her. Seeing a man’s face hovering close by as he woke her gently. His mouth moved, but Kiley hadn’t heard his words. Each time, she drifted back off until the next time.

The door opened and a nurse with a sweet smile stepped inside. “Oh, good, you’re awake.”

“Yeah, I think,” Kiley whispered, her voice rough. “How did I get here?”

“Doctor said you walked,” she said, checking Kiley’s vitals on the monitor. “You got yourself here somehow, hon. How are you feeling?”

“It hurts—a lot,” she answered. “And I have to pee, but I…uh, I can’t exactly…you know, and I don’t want to use it…it’s weird.”

The nurse smiled. “We’ll get you unhooked and get you to the restroom. No need to be embarrassed. You were out for two days.”

Kiley blanched. “Two days?”

The nurse patted her hand. “No need to fret, hon. We took good care of you here.”

An hour later, Kiley had washed up in the bathroom and was settled back in bed. The nurse, Hailey, was very friendly but couldn’t tell Kiley too much about her condition. She said she would track down the doctor who’d found her and he could fill her in. Kiley gripped the sheets hard at the idea of a man she didn’t know being in a room alone with her, but she needed to know how bad her injuries were. As soon as Hailey left, she sank into the bed, curling in on herself the best she could despite the pain.

Keeping up a hopeful smile for an hour was hard, and her cheeks ached from the strain. She had nothing to be happy about. Those men had attacked her because of Ned, except she wasn’t with Ned anymore. He wouldn’t get the message and if they found her once, they would find her again. She wasn’t safe in this city anymore.

Tears slipped unbidden from her eyes, and she buried her face in the pillow, hating herself even more for being so weak. She deserved what happened to her after what she let happen to those other people.

You would have been killed sooner if you’d stood up to him, her conscience told her. You know this.

But it did nothing to lessen the guilt eating her alive from the inside out. All she wanted was to disappear and not have to deal with this life. It shouldn’t be so hard, so unfair. If those idiots knew where she would be running, they had to know where she stayed. They’d probably trashed her room by now, which meant she had nothing. No money, no phone, no clothes. She thought when she ran away from Ned she was at rock bottom. Now she realized she hadn’t been close at all. Lying in the hospital bed as she tried to accept her fate was rock bottom.

She could be one of those women she’d helped as a social worker. No family, no friends. The last one wasn’t completely true. She had friends, but they lived out of state, and she had lied to them all for the last six months about her situation. They assumed she was living the happy life with an awesome boyfriend and a job where she could help people. None of them knew the truth, and she wanted to keep it that way. Their looks of sympathy would kill her, knowing what she had done. She deserved no kindness, no sympathy.

The door opened and Kiley froze on the bed.

“Ma’am? Hailey said you were awake?”

That voice—she recognized it. Was he the one who had soothed her? She rolled over, wincing with the movement, and observed the man standing near the doorway. His brown hair was shaggy and hung over his forehead, but it suited his kind, strong face. His bone structure was incredible, and the dimples in his cheeks when he offered a soft smile would’ve made her weak at the knees on any other day.

The attack had made her numb inside, and she barely nodded at him. He stepped closer and she stiffened, so he stopped.

“You’re safe here,” he promised. “You came to us in a pretty rough condition. Do you remember what happened?” She bit down hard on her lip. “You don’t have to talk right away,” he said and took another step closer. “I need to check your vitals and tell you about your injuries.” He stood by the bed, and Kiley slid to the other side as far away from him as she could get.

She told herself she was being stupid, that he wouldn’t attack her, but her body was in survival mode. This man was tall and broad at the shoulders. He was bigger than the men in the alley, and she swallowed around the lump in her throat.

“You had a mild concussion,” he informed her. “I’m not sure if you remember us waking you up every few hours, but you seem to be doing fine. You have stitches in your side from a deep gash and stitches in your thigh.” His face darkened and a flash of anger shot through his eyes. He blinked and it was gone.

Kiley touched the bandage, but he shook his head.

“Let it heal. You’ll see it soon enough.” He looked like he wanted to say more, but after a moment’s hesitation, shook his head and stepped back again. “You’ll be sore for a while, but I’ll prescribe some pain meds to take the edge off.”

She bobbed her head in thanks but didn’t speak.

“Some of your injuries…appeared older,” he said gently. “If there’s anything you need to talk about, there’s a psychiatrist here at the hospital. She’s more than willing to speak with you.”

Kiley closed in on herself and shook her head.

“It’s fine, but you should tell someone what happened. I had to call the police. They’re here now so you can tell them what happened and file a report,” he tried again, but she turned her back to him. He sighed and she braced on instinct, but his steps retreated.

She wanted to be alone, but murmuring voices sounded behind her. Two cops joined the doctor in the room. She hunkered even further down, holding the sheet to her body and willing them to go away.

“Ma’am? Dr. Devons called us in so you could explain what happened,” a gruff voice said. “Can you tell us your name at least?”

She shook her head.

“Can you tell us what happened? Where it happened?” the cop tried again, but still she refused to answer. “We can’t catch whomever did this to you unless you speak to us. If you’re afraid of them coming back, we’ll protect you.”

Kiley shut her eyes and trembled all over in fear. She didn’t know who she could trust, and she wasn’t about to spill everything to two cops she didn’t know. After five minutes of questions and her flat out refusing to answer, the cops whispered to Dr. Devons and left. Kiley watched them leave, but the man stayed behind.

“They’re only trying to help,” he whispered softly, but she rolled over again and he sighed. “Alright, you can talk with them later when you’re up for it. I’ll be here if you need anything, as will Hailey. Get some rest.”

She heard the door open and whispered, “Kiley.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Kiley, that’s my name,” she whispered louder. “Thanks for bringing me here.”

“You’re welcome, but you should thank yourself. You came to us.”

She turned enough so she could see him, but no more words left her mouth. He bowed his head and left her to rest. The door closed, and she clutched at the edge of the bed, shutting her eyes fiercely and wishing she could disappear into that blissful darkness where there was no pain and no guilt.

***

The next morning, a different nurse brought Kiley breakfast, but she picked at her food until an orderly came and removed her tray. The doctor hadn’t come back to see her yet, but that was fine. The less she saw that man with his warm smile the better. She didn’t want to disappoint him.

The door opened and she expected to see a nurse, but a woman with black hair pulled back in a clip, black-rimmed glasses, and mocha colored skin stepped into the room. She wore a white coat and a brightly colored floral dress. She stepped forward and held out her hand to Kiley.

“I’m Dr. Voras, the hospital psychiatrist,” she said softly.

Kiley shook her hand quickly. “Kiley.”

“Do you have a last name, Kiley?”

She glanced at the door as if Ned or those other assholes would suddenly appear to finish her off. “Innis.”

“Very nice to meet you. Do you mind if I sit and speak with you for a few minutes?”

Kiley shook her head, and Dr. Voras pulled a chair closer to the bed. “Dr. Devons tells me you haven’t said what happened to you yet. Do you want to talk about it with me?”

“Dr. Devons?” she asked, confused.

“The man who found you on the sidewalk. Charlie,” Dr. Voras said. “He’s the one who’s taken care of you.”

Charlie. Kiley liked the name. It suited his dimpled smile.

“Do you want to tell me about the attack?” She shook her head and slouched in the bed. “That’s fine, but know you’re safe here, Kiley. No one can get to you.”

“I’m not… I’m not ready,” she whispered, and Dr. Voras nodded. “Not yet.”

“Of course, take your time.” She jotted notes on her clipboard. “And what about your previous injuries? Dr. Devons says you had prior bruising and a cut on your forehead. Can you tell me about those?”

Kiley shut her eyes tightly, shaking her head. “I can’t.”

“Nothing at all? You know, talking about it can help. But you have to give it a chance.”

Except talking about what happened would lead to so many more dangerous paths. So much guilt Kiley wasn’t ready to face. She rolled over so her back was to Dr. Voras and waited impatiently for the woman to leave her alone. She wanted everyone to leave her alone.

“If you change your mind about talking, call for the nurse,” Dr. Voras said warmly. “I’ll come back any time, Kiley. Any time at all.”

Kiley didn’t acknowledge the woman and waited until she was alone again. The room closed in around her, and she fought to breath normally. Hyperventilating would only bring more nurses into her room, and she wanted to be alone. She shoved the blankets aside and pulled her gown up, revealing the bandage on her thigh. Dr. Devons—Charlie—had said to let it heal, but he seemed so pissed off about the wound. She wanted to know why. If it was a cut, why was he upset?

She tugged at one corner of the tape, biting the inside of her cheek so she wouldn’t make a sound as the bandage came free. When she shoved it aside so she could see, her heart sank and her stomach roiled with a sudden wave of nausea. Bitch. They’d carved it into her leg. She had done nothing to deserve that.

Or maybe she had. This was her punishment for leading the life she had the past few months, for not fighting harder or helping those poor people when she had the chance. Kiley pressed her fingers hard into the wound, picking around the rough stitches needed for the slash made beneath the word once it was etched into her skin. Fresh blood seeped from the wound, covering her fingers. She let out a breath of relief, embracing the pain…letting it take her away…far away…

***

“How is she?” Charlie asked as Dr. Voras exited Kiley’s room.

“She’s quiet,” the psychiatrist said and sighed. “But if she’s been abused, it doesn’t surprise me. She’s probably terrified of whoever did this to her finding her again. I did snag her last name. We can see if she has any family in town we can call.”

“You think family is safe?” His hands curled around the edge of the counter.

Dr. Voras arched a brow. “What did you have in mind, Charlie? You seem to be quite protective of this woman.”

“And you’re not?” he challenged hotly. He sucked in a deep breath when she eyed him curiously. “Sorry. This one’s hard.”

“Abuse cases are always hard.”

“Whoever did that to her, they carved bitch into her leg, Mandy,” he muttered darkly.

Dr. Voras’ lip curled in disgust. “Assholes.”

“Exactly. I’m not about to throw her back to whatever wolves did this to her in the first place.”

“I can’t tell if it was family. It may take a few days for her to open up, but you said she’ll be discharged in what, two days? Three max?”

“Her wounds are healing, so as long as that concussion doesn’t cause her anymore problems, we’ll have to release her,” he confirmed. “I don’t think I can.”

Dr. Voras patted his arm. “Keep trying. You brought her in, and she saw you every time she opened her eyes. She might trust you but is unable to show it yet.”

Charlie watched as a nurse ducked into Kiley’s room to check on her during the rounds. A moment later, the page went off in the room, and Charlie was the first one through the door, Dr. Voras on his heels.

“No. Get off me,” Kiley pleaded, but the nurse held her hands away from her leg.

Charlie raced around the side of the bed to see the bandage ripped off her thigh and the wound picked open over the word. “We’ll have to reclean and dress this,” he said.

Kiley flung curses, but he sensed they weren’t directed at him or the staff. She stopped fighting the nurse and her arms fell limp at her side. She refused to meet anyone’s gaze, staring out the window behind Charlie.

Dr. Voras stood near the door, shaking her head sadly. Charlie wanted to ask if releasing this woman in two days was really their best option, but her hands were tied as much as his were. They weren’t a hotel, and unless Dr. Voras saw signs this woman was a danger to herself or others for sure, she would be forced to sign off on her. Charlie assumed Kiley picking at her injuries would be enough, but from the aggravated set of Dr. Voras’ face and the way she marched out of the room, it wasn’t. He slipped gloves on as the nurse brought him a tray with fresh bandaging and antiseptic to clean the wound. She hovered over his shoulder, but he told her quietly she could leave.

“Are you sure, Dr. Devons?” the nurse whispered worriedly.

“Yes, we’ll be fine,” he promised with a smile.

The nurse looked far from convinced but did as he asked, leaving him alone with Kiley.

Charlie removed the rest of the bandage from Kiley’s thigh and set it aside. “You were supposed to leave this alone,” he reminded her gently, dabbing at the wound.

She winced but made no sound, and her gaze remained elsewhere.

“You don’t have to let this moment define you,” he went on. “Whoever did this to you, they’re wrong, not you. Just like whoever hurt you before.”

“That is none of your business,” she snapped hotly, but he heard the waver in her words.

He lifted his gaze, and those emerald eyes blazed at him with so much guilt and pain and rage, he forgot what he was in the middle of doing. His blood ran hot thinking this woman had been through a situation so traumatic she was lost in a tidal wave of roiling emotion.

“It is my business,” he finally managed to say. “You came to my hospital.”

“You own it?” she asked sharply. “I didn’t see a name on the building.”

Her angry act might have convinced someone else, but Charlie sensed the despair lingering close to the surface. She wanted to push him away so hard and fast, he wouldn’t think twice about leaving this room and not coming back unless it was with her discharge papers. He wasn’t so easily swayed.

“No, but I like to think it’s still partially mine, like it’s partially the nurses and the other doctors. I take pride in where I work.”

She sucked her bottom lip in and her body tensed.

“Do you have a job? Something you do?”

She turned her head away from him.

“Aren’t you the chatterbox?” He focused on her thigh, and once it was cleaned, applied a fresh bandage. “You sure you don’t remember anything that happened?” he tried again, not wanting to leave her yet. She seemed so lost lying in the bed, turning inward as if no one could help her.

“Not a thing. Why do you care so much?”

He peeled off his gloves and shrugged. “I’m merely that kind of guy.”

“Does every doctor here wear a t-shirt and jeans?”

“My vacation technically started the morning you came in,” he informed her. “But I decided to stick around and make sure you were all right.”

She huffed but that too was an act. “I can take care of myself.”

“Clearly,” he murmured too quietly for her to hear, or so he thought.

A pillow whacked him in the back of the head, and he whipped around to see her clutching the other one, her skin pale and hands trembling. “Don’t you dare. How was I supposed to fight off three assholes in a fucking alley? They had a knife. A goddamn knife to my throat and they…they…” She shuddered and the pillow fell from her hands as she folded in on herself, her arms wrapping around her uninjured leg, and buried her face in her hands.

Charlie reached out to comfort her, but she thrashed away from him. He held up his hands and backed off. “All right, all right, I’m not going to hurt you. You’re safe, Kiley. No one will hurt you again, I promise.”

“Don’t say that,” she whispered in a voice wracked with so much pain, Charlie was struck mute by it. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep. “

Charlie Devons was good with his patients, from all walks of life and in most situations, but this woman was so broken and beaten down, he was at a loss for how to get through to her. How to help her understand she was safe. He wouldn’t let those monsters lay another hand on her.

What will you do? Hunt them down?

He ignored the chiding, mocking voice in the back of his mind. “If you were attacked, you should file a report. Let me bring the police in. They can help you,” he suggested, but she was already shaking her head and scrambling as far into the wall as she could.

“No, no cops.”

“Kiley,” he pleaded. “You need to report this attack…and the one that happened before.”

Her face crumpled.

“More than one that happened before?” he guessed, hating how she shivered in fear, like a wounded animal waiting for the end to come. “Promise me you’ll think about it, please.”

He expected her to throw something else at him, but she nodded so subtly he wasn’t sure if she meant it. He backed away and reached for the door.

“Wait, Dr. Devons,” she whispered.

“Charlie, please,” he insisted. “You can call me Charlie.”

She shifted uncomfortably at his attempt to open the communication between them—or he assumed that was what made her squirm on the bed. What she asked next, though, awoke an anger he thought he couldn’t feel.

“Was I… when I came in was I… I can’t tell—the pain from everywhere else… it’s kind of hard,” she mumbled. “Can you tell me if they…if they…”

He cursed inwardly as he realized what she tried to ask, her cheeks flaming red with shame. His first instinct said to go to her and calm her, soothe her fears, but that would only make matters worse. “You had the gashes and the bruises, and that horrid word on your leg,” he said, “but you were not raped, Kiley. They didn’t do anything to you.”

The smile that broke across her face made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. He wasn’t scared of her attacking him. No, he was worried about her doing something to herself…or to those men who attacked her if she ever found them again.

“Thank God for that, at least,” she whispered.

Charlie longed to stay and speak with her more, but she turned her back to him. “If you decide you want to talk, there are plenty of people here who would be willing to listen,” he settled on briefly. “All you have to do is ask.” He left her alone and stepped into the hall and found Dr. Voras waiting for him. “What do you think now?”

“She’s still not posing a serious threat to herself or others,” Dr. Voras said. “I’m sorry. She’s been through an attack, so there’s bound to be some pent-up emotion, but it’s not uncommon for patients of attacks to pick at their injuries like that, or blame themselves.”

“She said something about men in an alley with a knife,” he grunted and laughing bitterly. “She asked if she’d been raped. She was in too much pain everywhere else, she couldn’t tell.”

“You said the bruising was all along her legs and stomach. It’s understandable for her to want to be certain.” Dr. Voras leaned against the wall as Charlie paced, holding his hands to his head as he tried to figure out his next move. “You’re planning something.”

“I’ll inform the cops first thing in the morning. She said no cops, but she can’t let this go unreported. They could have killed her.”

Dr. Voras’ head tilted as she mused, “Maybe she’s afraid they still will.”

“Why would muggers come after her?”

“Did she say they were muggers? Charlie, she had the word bitch carved into her leg. That doesn’t seem like a random act of violence to me. That sounds personal.”

“You’re saying she knows who attacked her?” His mind raced and his hands curled into fists. “You think it has something to do with her older wounds?” He glanced towards Kiley’s room in disbelief. Had she been running away when the attack happened? Trying to escape the man who hurt her? “What do we do?”

Dr. Voras consulted her clipboard for a moment. “Call the police in the morning.”

“But I thought that would make it worse?”

“It might, but she was viciously attacked, and I, in good conscience, cannot let it slide. Can you?”

“Hell no.” He only hoped when the police showed up the next morning, she wouldn’t hate him forever for trying to do the right thing. “I’m going to grab a quick shower, and then I’ll be back to sit with her—or at least be here for her.”

“Why are you still here?” Millie scolded, walking down the hall. “You’re not picking up another night shift, are you?”

Charlie assured her he wasn’t. “My patient from this morning? She’s not doing too well, mentally speaking. I’m not leaving until I see her safely out of here and after I know she won’t do anything stupid.”

“Are we worried about her hurting herself?” she asked, turning to Dr. Voras.

“No, I think she’ll be fine, but I would advise a nurse check in on her at least once an hour. Sometimes people can act unexpectedly.” She saluted them both and moved down the hall.

Millie crossed her arms as she studied Charlie with a critical eye. “Really, Charlie, what are you doing?”

“Looking after a patient.”

“You should have gone home hours ago, handed over her case to another doctor.”

Charlie gave her his most charming smile. “You know me, Millie.”

“Yes, I do, and that’s why I’m worried. You care about your patients, but sometimes you care too much,” she warned. “You can’t have relations with your patients, you know that.”

“I never said I would. Can’t I stick around to make sure she’s all right?”

Don’t lie. You can’t leave her side and you have no idea why, but you do know it’s not merely to see her home in one piece.

He saw so many faces pass through the ER doors and cared for all the people he treated, but Kiley reached out to him without meaning to in a way that told him she was like a drowning person seeking help. She might not say it aloud, but she was desperate for someone—anyone—to throw her a lifeline. Charlie couldn’t stand by when he could be the person who saved her from more suffering.

Beneath the bruising and the cuts, she was attractive with her dark burgundy hair, emerald green eyes, and the freckles dotting her cheeks. He had yet to see her real smile, but he bet it was amazing and beautiful.

“That look right there?” Millie said, pointing at his face. “That’s why I suggest you go home now before you get any more attached to this woman.”

“I’m not attached,” he argued.

“See that you’re not and that you don’t do anything you’ll regret later.”

“Like what?”

“Like getting involved with a patient and opening us up to a string of lawsuits and shit I don’t want to deal with. Watch yourself, please, Charlie. I’m asking as your friend,” she said, her face softening. “Once she’s out of this hospital, she is no longer your concern.”

“She won’t be my patient anymore,” he pointed out.

Millie’s eyes narrowed. “She could be if she has complications, which is why I’m asking you to pass her case to another doctor.”

The rational side of his mind said she was right, but the part that longed to comfort this woman said to hell with it and he shook his head. “I’ll remain her doctor. You have nothing to worry about.”

“See that I don’t.” She glanced sympathetically at the door to Kiley’s room. “Poor girl. No one deserves to be treated like that.”

Charlie agreed wholeheartedly as Millie left him alone outside Kiley’s room. He peeked in through the window in the door, but she had rolled onto her back and her eyes were closed. Rest was the best thing for her right now. Come morning, she would face a decision to report what had happened or let her attackers go free. He rapped his knuckles lightly on the wall before pushing away. He told the nurses to get him if anything changed and hit the showers. What had started out as a long night turned into an even longer day. He was into his second night at the hospital and debated where he could catch a few hours of shut eye and not be disturbed by Susie or any other persistent nurse.

There was only one woman he had a care for now, and she wanted nothing to do with him.

The last woman he dated had been over six months ago. He spent too much time at the hospital, she’d told him. They parted on civil terms. She wanted a man who could be home every night for dinner and be there in the morning for breakfast. A man who gave her as much devotion as he gave his patients, but he simply couldn’t do that. She worried about distracting him from living the life he wanted, and after a sweet kiss, she wished Charlie well. Since then, he let himself be absorbed by his work and put his heart and soul into this hospital. No woman struck a chord with him until Kiley collapsed in his arms. He told himself, as he laid down on the couch in the doctor’s lounge, that he merely felt so strongly for her because he was worried.

Deep down, he sensed it was more than that, but couldn’t for the life of him figure out why.

He sank into a fitful sleep, and by the time the sun rose the next morning, he was more exhausted than the morning before. Snagging a cup of coffee, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and went to make a very difficult phone call.