A NEW DANGER
Ambeal sat in the turret. She was in the top-most room, looking out over a cold landscape. She sat by the fire, a shawl around her shoulders. She felt as if she had frozen inside and could not get warm.
I need to get out of here.
The more she thought about it, the less possible it seemed. She needed to leave this place. Her own home had become a threatening cage. However, the more she thought about leaving, the more impossible it began to seem. She was one woman. She was facing her father and Beiste, two implacable enemies. Moreover, maybe they were right that she was insane?
She clenched her hands, feeling her nails digging into her palms.
“I am not insane,” she said quietly. “I will find out what is going on.”
Since the missing delivery of the wood, other things had happened too. The steward had reported a deficit in the budget. The farmer in the valley claimed he had not been paid for milk. No one said anything, but all eyes turned to Ambeal.
They all think I'm going mad now.
The more she felt determined to prove her innocence and sanity, the more she felt as if she was actually mad. Maybe she really had forgotten those things? Maybe what Beiste said was right, that she was not in her right mind? Maybe the fact that she was convinced of her own sanity was part of the madness.
I need to get out of here.
It wasn't just the threat of madness. It was the fact that here, she had no idea where Alf was. She was trapped here, powerless, unable to help, while he rode to confront a dangerous enemy. She felt sick every time she thought of it. Yet, she could not stop herself from thinking it.
“My lady?”
She looked up dully as someone spoke to her. She realized she had been sitting hunched at the fire, hands clasped, staring into the flames. She stood, smoothing down her skirts.
“Yes?”
The disturbance was one of the newer maidservants. She looked at her hands, looking nervous. “Milady, a summons from downstairs.”
“What? Oh. Yes. I'll go.”
“No, let me come up.”
Ambeal shut her eyes despondently as Beiste's voice interrupted them. He walked past the maid and into the chamber. The maid looked up wordlessly, curtsied to him and left.
They were alone together.
Ambeal stood with her back to the wall. She felt instantly on the defensive. What did he want with her, here, alone?
“Beiste,” she warned.
“Ambeal,” he said with a hesitant smile. “You know me. Why would I harm you?”
Ambeal laughed. “I wonder why, Beiste.”
He frowned as if he was worried about her, and then took her hand. “Come, dear. Sit down.”
Ambeal bit her lip. She wanted to laugh. How dare he pretend he was concerned for her? He was the one making her think she was out of her mind, or making other people think so anyhow! How dare he pretend he cared about her?
“Beiste,” she said, staying where she was. “If you have something to say, please do so.”
He sighed. “My dear girl. You know that I care about you. I always have. Now...” he paused, rubbing a weary hand down his handsome face momentarily. “Now I find that things are not as they were. I am disturbed by your marriage, Ambeal.”
She laughed. “Why, Beiste?”
“Well, because it's changed you. You are a delicate girl. I can see the strain of this bad decision weighs on you. Now. If you wish my advice, I would say annul it.”
Ambeal drew in a long, shaky breath. “I need no advice,” she said in a thin, clear voice. Inside she shook. Outside she seemed calm. “I am quite well. My mind's made up.”
He sighed. “As you wish.” He sat down on the settee opposite her. He looked up at her, brown eyes soft with reproach. “I will leave today,” he said carefully. “I have important business. But know this, Ambeal,” he said softly. “I am ready to wed you. If you wish it – when things get hard, when you need shelter, safety and a place to run from all this turmoil in your world – I am here. You will need somewhere to run, I think. I'll be that place.”
Ambeal stared at him. She laughed. “I am running nowhere.”
“As you wish,” he said softly. The words were not a threat, merely resigned. Ambeal shivered.
“I will go downstairs,” she said in a thin voice. “I have much to think on.”
“Yes,” he said. “You do.”
Ambeal shot him a look, but he said nothing further and so she walked away, heading towards the door.
He stood and she tensed. Was he going to grab at her again?
He made no attempt to touch her, though, merely inclined that grave, handsome head in a bow. Then he stood aside for her to leave.
Ambeal walked down the stairs, heart pounding in her chest. She couldn't think straight. Couldn't breathe. All she knew was that there was some small respite. Beiste was leaving.
She crossed the hallway downstairs, heading to the colonnade. She walked across the checkered floor, heading to the courtyard and the stables. She needed a ride.
She needed to distract herself from her concern for Alf. If she stayed here in these four walls with Beiste always watching her and her worry for Alf, she really would go mad.
“My lady!” a man called out. She closed her eyes a moment. What was the matter?
“Yes, Rodney?”
“My lady! The chief verderer was looking for you.”
“The chief verderer?” That was Ewan. She frowned. What could he want? She turned and hurried away, heading to the stables.
With everything that had gone wrong here lately, she worried for Ewan. Had aught happened?
When she got there, she paused. “Ewan?”
“Yes, milady?”
“There you are!” she felt relieved to see the kindly face again. In the whole of the castle, there were two she trusted implicitly – Ewan and her maid.
“My lady. I apologize for disturbing you,” he said gravely. “I just needed to report something I noticed in the village.”
“Something you noticed?” she frowned.
“Aye, my lady. It was Seamus, the shepherd,” he explained. “The man works for Drummond, the farmer, aye?”
“Yes, I know of him,” she nodded. Drummond was the farmer who now claimed he'd not been paid yet.
“Well, he was in the ironmongers paying off the farmer's debt there,” he said. “He was saying how the farmer had just come into money. Of course, Laidlaw – that's the ironworker – he's interested. He asks him, how did he come into this money? He says a man gave it to him. A big man with black hair and a brown plaid. On a black horse.” He raised his brows inquiringly.
“A man with black hair on a black horse...oh!” Amabel covered her mouth with her hand as she looked down the row of stalls. Beiste had ridden here on a black horse. He was likely still in the end stall, where they stabled the new horses. She stared at him.
“Aye, I thought so,” he nodded. “Something unsavory going on.”
Amabel nodded. “I think so,” she said softly. “Thank you, Ewan.”
He grinned. “Don't mention it.”
As she considered this news, Amabel thought it made a lot of sense. Beiste had been paying the workers to foment dissent. Some of them were incorruptible, of course. However, when a man had debt and small children to feed, who wouldn't agree to tell a lie or two for a coin or two of gold? She felt her heart thump in her chest.
It's not proof, but it almost his. How could he?
“Thank you, Ewan,” she said again, warmly. “You're a good friend.”
He blinked at her, and she was surprised to see he was almost crying. “Thank you, milady.”
She smiled. “Don't mention it.”
She turned and headed back into the house.
“The lying, cheating, horrible...” she sighed. “How could he?”
“Milady?” Bronna appeared as she crossed the room, heading upstairs.
“Yes?” she asked. “Sorry, Bronna. I was just angry.”
“Good, milady,” Bronna said with a soft smile. “Never a bad thing to be, in my view. Milady, I was asked to tell you that his lordship just left.”
“Oh.” Ambeal felt her body slump, relieved. She had not known how frightened she had been until now, when she no longer had to be. She reached for the wall to steady herself. She was relieved, too, to note that, of all those closest to her, Bronna did not think she'd gone mad.
Her maid smiled at her. “I also have some other news.”
“Oh?” Ambeal asked, raising a brow. What now? She feared some new report of mismanagement, the flour finished, or the barley molded, or something of that nature. However, Bronna was still smiling.
“A horse has been sighted on the moors, milady. Alf is coming home.”
Ambeal stared at her. She felt a grin cover her face and her heart filled with delight. She laughed.
“Thank you, Bronna!” she said happily. “He's alive!”
They both laughed.
Ambeal felt her heart soar and her spirits lift. She knew Alf was alive. He was safe and he was coming home.
Everything else was possible now.