FINDING THE WAY AHEAD
The solar was warm, despite the fretful breeze outside the windows. All the same, Ettie felt completely numb. She sat on the settee, alone, bent over a new piece of embroidery.
Where is he? Please, please, let him be safe.
She had been pacing earlier, but had stopped now and sat with her head bowed over the tiny patterns of flowers and leaves she sewed as if there was meaning to be found in amongst the silken threads.
“What will I do if they kill him?”
It didn't make sense. Contemplating a world without Brodgar was like trying to imagine the castle without its walls – no, like the whole world without a sky. It was like staring at a dark void.
She stared off into the distance, lost in her memories of him. Brodgar, kissing her here in this place. On the roof together. In the woods.
“Henriette?”
Ettie blinked. Was someone calling her name? No. It must have been the wind, hissing past the windows.
“Henriette!”
“Oh!”
Henriette stared as Amice appeared in the doorway. Her face was white with shock, and her eyes were huge. “Ettie!” she whispered. “Please. I need help.”
“Amice?” Ettie stood and went to her, put her arms round her and drew her to the settle. “What is it, little sister? Tell me?”
Amice held her hand. She was looking out into the room, but clearly not seeing it. Her body shook and Ettie held her, really worried now. What had happened?
“Alf. It's Alf. Oh, Ettie...” Amice covered her face and sobbed.
“What?” Ettie felt as if someone stabbed her in the chest. Where was Alf? Was he dead? Captured? Harmed? “What about him?”
“He's here.”
“What?” Ettie stared at her. Of all the news, that was the most surprising. And horrifying, for a whole lot of other reasons. If Alf was here, then...then it's only a matter of time before The MacDonnell finds out, and then there really will be war.
“He's downstairs,” Amice whispered. “In the cellar. I hid him. Oh, God...what will we do?”
“You hid him. Good.” Ettie felt her heart racing even as strange calm descended. Now she could think again, slowly. Make a plan. “Was there anyone else who saw him? Does anyone know he's here?”
“No.” Amice shook her head. “At least, I don't think so. I wouldn't let Father or anyone know.”
“Good,” Ettie said, stroking her soft red hair. “That's good.”
“What can we do?” Amice whispered. “This is so dangerous, Ettie...” She trailed off, burying her face in her hands.
“Is he alone?” Ettie asked quickly. Alf on his own would be no real problem: if none of the MacDonnell men saw him, how would anyone know he was responsible? It could be explained away.
“No,” Amice said in a whisper.
“No?”
“He has Ambeal with him.”
“Oh. My.” Ettie felt herself sway in her seat. That really was bad. Alf! How could he even think of doing such a thing? Did he want to endanger everything? Bring war to their doorstep? What can we do?
“I know, Ettie,” Amice whispered. “I saw them in the grounds. By the wall. I thought it was townspeople, coming for aid. I went to them and they begged me to hide them. Said the roads are full of men-at-arms. We have to help.”
“Well, he hasn't given us much choice, has he?” She smiled. Amice managed to giggle.
“Oh, Ettie. You're so sensible and practical. I knew you'd help.”
Ettie shivered. “I hope I can.”
“I didn't know what to do.” Amice said. “I wasn't sure who we should tell.”
“We should tell Chrissie.”
“Oh, no!” Amice covered her rosebud mouth with her hand. “No, Ettie. We can't risk any of them knowing...”
She meant any of the older members of the family. Ettie would be inclined to agree, except for Chrissie's sorrow. Learning her son were here would likely cheer her, despite the danger. And they could do with an extra head to think over this problem.
“She is his mother,” she said reasonably. “She would help.”
“You're right, of course.” Amice sniffed. “But if Father found out...I never saw him in such a rage. I thought he might exile Alf, or kill him...” she shuddered.
Ettie put her arm around Amice. “I know he was angry. But I don't think Lord Broderick is the kind of man to let his anger cloud everything.”
“I hope not,” Amice whispered.
She looked into Ettie's eyes. Ettie made herself sound confident, though inside she was terribly nervous. “Come on. We'll find her.”
They stood and, Ettie still holding her hand, walked to Chrissie's suite beside Ettie's bedroom.
“Aunt Chrissie?” Amice called as Ettie knocked. “Are you there?”
They waited for a few moments and heard footsteps, and then the door opened. Chrissie appeared. She had been crying recently, Ettie judged, though she had covered it with face powder. She blinked at the two at the threshold.
“Nieces? What is it?” she asked softly. “Can I help?”
“Are you alone, Aunt?” Ettie asked, indicating the chamber behind.
“Yes.”
“Can we come in?” Amice asked.
“Of course, girls. But what is it?” Chrissie asked, sounding worried. “Has something happened? Is it your mother?” she asked Amice, a frown between her brows. Lady Amabel had been inconsolable since Brodgar left, and the last Ettie had seen, she'd been pacing the upper hallway, talking to no one except Alina.
“No, it's not that,” Amice said. Ettie shut the door behind them and they faced Chrissie together.
“It's Alf.”
“He's back.”
When the news was out, Chrissie's face transformed into a grin. “He is? Is he safe? Where is he? Can I see him?”
“He's downstairs,” Ettie said carefully. “In the cellar.”
“Why? Why isn't he up here, with me?” Chrissie asked quickly. “Is he hurt? Take me to him!”
“He's hiding,” Amice explained quickly. “He's a fugitive.”
“Why?” Chrissie looked agonized, her cornflower-blue eyes wide with disbelief and sorrow. “What happened?”
“He has Ambeal with him.” Ettie said it quickly. The sooner she knew, the better. Then they could think of a solution together.
“Oh...” Chrissie sat down abruptly. She looked up at the girls. “Heaven help us. What was he thinking? How could he?”
“I know, Aunt,” Ettie said grimly. “He's endangering us.”
“He is hidden, though,” Amice said helpfully. “If no one knows they're here, then there's no danger, is there?”
Chrissie took her hand, smiling fondly at her niece. “My dear, you're right. All we need to do is keep them safe and keep them hidden until the negotiations. That's true.”
“Well, then,” Ettie said, feeling suddenly nervous. “Will anyone find them?”
“The cellar is rarely used,” Amice explained. “The only person who goes down there often is the cook, and Lady Amabel, to take stock. He's in the root cellar, at the back,” she explained quickly to Chrissie, who nodded.
“Wise girl. He can stay hidden there for a while. Now, how about provisions?”
Ettie couldn't help feeling relieved as Chrissie made practical plans. It seemed feasible to keep him hidden for a few days, and Ambeal with him. At least until they had a chance to think of something better.
“Right,” Chrissie was saying. “Now. We need two cloaks. Two lamps. Some blankets, a basket of breads and pastries. A ham. A torch, perhaps, for warmth...”
“Yes, Aunt,” Amice was saying, counting the items off on her fingers as Chrissie said them. Ettie nodded.
“We should keep a guard,” Ettie commented. “Someone posted to see that no one comes around there and warn them to stay hidden if they do.”
“Good thought, Ettie,” Amice beamed at her, making her feel proud.
“We could ask Glenna,” Chrissie suggested, “or Blaire, my maid. We wouldn't have to explain to them exactly what was happening. That way, if they're questioned, they don't need to lie.”
“Yes. Good. Good idea.” Amice nodded fervently. “If they went down to the north tower, to the room at the bottom, they could see anyone coming around to the door round the back,” she added, thinking aloud.
“Good thinking, niece.” Chrissie stroked her hair. “Now. Let's get provisions.”
“Won't someone suspect us, if we take things from the kitchens?” Ettie asked practically. She was rewarded with a wry grin from Chrissie.
“If I say I want a basket of bread and pastries, I don't think Cook will question anything. And as for the lamps and cloaks and things, we can get those from the attic without anyone knowing. If anyone asks, we're off riding.”
“Good idea, Aunt!” Amice beamed. She looked much happier – it seemed as if it was turning into an adventure.
Ettie could feel hope inside her. “Well, then,” she said, looking about. “We'd best get it all done quickly. They'll freeze down there without warm clothing.”
Amice shivered and nodded.
Twenty minutes later, their provisions put together, the three hurried down the stairs to the root cellar together. They arrived in a dark space that smelled faintly musty. Ettie drew her cloak around her. It was cold down here! She walked over the stone-flagged floor, holding Amice's shoulder for direction, as it was also rather dark.
“Alf?” Amice whispered. “It's me.”
“Son?” Lady Chrissie called. “My son?”
“Mother!” A young man appeared suddenly out of the gloom and launched himself at Chrissie. Busy kindling the lamp, Ettie found herself blinking back tears. The two clung to each other in the sudden golden light, Chrissie's small form pressed tight against Alf's chest. He stroked her back and Chrissie's face twisted as she held back her tears.
“Amice?” a voice whispered. Amice turned.
“Yes, Ambeal?”
“Is it safe if people know...” she started, and then trailed off as Ettie lifted the lamp. She found herself looking at a tall, slender girl of her own age or perhaps a little older, with straight auburn hair that hung to her waist and a long, slim face. Her brown eyes were slightly slanted at the corners, her mouth full and trembling faintly. She was beautiful, Ettie thought. She could see why Alf had gone a little mad seeing her.
“This is my cousin Henriette,” Amice explained firmly. Ettie felt her own heart warm at the words, which were entirely untrue – she was no blood relative whatsoever. “Ettie, meet Lady Ambeal, daughter of the thane of Bronley.”
“I'm pleased to meet you.”
“I, too, to meet you.”
The two regarded each other steadily. Ettie found she liked something about her – the way she met her gaze so fearlessly, the way she was so solemn despite the danger so clearly facing them. She had courage.
“And you think you'll stay long?”
“I don't know.”
Ettie turned back to where Alf and Chrissie were talking. Their voices low and grave, they were clearly having an important discussion. She and Amice turned to tune in. Ambeal joined them. She was half a hand taller than Ettie, much taller than Amice. They all listened to Chrissie's reply.
“Son, you know it's not safe. But we'll do our best to keep you hidden for four days. That way, when Broderick has made some plan, perhaps you can be set on your way, in secret.”
“The ways were all blocked,” Alf whispered, clearly still shocked by what he had seen. His long, lean face showed signs of shock and Ettie wished they could do more to comfort him.
“You think they will not lift the blockade soon?” Ettie inquired.
“My father is ruthless,” Ambeal said firmly. She sounded angry even though her words were said softly. Ettie realized from the set of her mouth and her defiant posture that she did not like her father very much. “He won't stop looking.”
“If you went by the road to Inverglass,” Chrissie said, musing. “And in disguise, you could get through. Go North.”
“That might work, Mother,” Alf said, resting a hand on her shoulder. Chrissie smiled warmly at him. “Where would we go?”
“I have a connection with Inverglass,” Chrissie said, musingly. “You could stay there a day or two. And they might convey you to Lochlann.”
“I wouldn't wish to bring peril to Joanna,” Alf said instantly. “It would be as bad, were I discovered there. Father would go to aid her and there would still be war, only on two fronts.”
“That's true,” Chrissie nodded.
“If you were in disguise, though,” Ettie mused, “no one would know you were there.”
“Joanna could hide you, Alf,” Amice said. “Lochlann is much bigger and older and you know no one has ever breached it.”
“True,” Alf nodded. “Well, we could try.” He looked at Ambeal and Ettie was touched by the expression that passed between them. He adored her, clearly. Ambeal cleared her throat.
“I should give myself up. I should never have brought this peril on you all.” She bit her lip. “My...f...father is a cruel man. But I should return.”
Her voice was brave, but Ettie heard the tremor below it. She took her hand even as Alf opened his mouth to protest.
“No, Ambeal,” she said firmly. “No one wishes you gone.”
“My daughter,” Chrissie said, surprising all of them. “You are welcome here. Whatever happens, we would not give you up. I think Alf would fight all of them single-handed, but he won't have to,” she added with a quick glance at her son.
Alf chuckled. “I would try, Mother,” he agreed. “And get myself run through on the first bout. Better that we never have to do that.”
“Oh, my son.” Chrissie ran a hand across his auburn hair fondly. “I know you'd try. But I don't want you killed. No one has to die for this. Hope. We have to have it.”
Ettie nodded, feeling hope flood her body. As the candles and torches were kindled, the place took on a ruddy warmth. They cleared a place in the center of the floor and spread a cloth, making a makeshift picnic table. The basket of bread and pastries was opened and Alf ate as if he'd never seen a meal before.
Ambeal, holding a rolled pastry, a fleck of it on her lip, turned to Ettie. “Thank you,” she said softly. “For helping.”
“Not at all.” Ettie smiled at her. She found herself liking the tall, solemn woman. She hoped they would be friends – it would be likely they'd have a chance to be, if all turned out well.
“We should go,” Amice said after a while. “But before we go, we have to finish planning.”
“Yes.” Alf nodded, swallowing hard. He wiped his mouth and sat to face his mother. “We will stay for four days, like you suggest. Then head north to Inverglass in disguise.”
“You can be two peddlers,” Amice suggested. “Mayhap you could even take the cart.”
“It might work,” Chrissie nodded. “The more convincing it is, the less likely any of the guards are to look too closely.”
“Or two lepers,” Ettie said, musing. “On the way to the monastery.”
Alf nodded. “I think even your father's guards would let us pass like that.”
Ambeal nodded. “Anything to stop them from looking too closely.”
They decided that the idea – macabre and fate-tempting though it was – might work. Ambeal agreed her father's guards would only let them pass if they were completely in disguise.
“Well, then,” Chrissie said. “We've put Glenna on guard. And we'll return later with more provisions. Work out a routine, so that no one notices any one of us slipping away. We're in this together, ladies,” she said, turning to all of them with a beam.
Ettie smiled, feeling a sense of welcome she had never really felt in her life before. She was an only child, raised alone with her parents in their solemn hall. She suddenly had a family.
Blinking back tears, she stood. “Come,” she said to Amice. “We should go.”
Chrissie was already standing. “We'll leave the torches and lamps lit – no reason why not, since you can't see down here from outside. If Glenna bangs on the roof three times, douse them.”
“Yes, Mother.” Alf smiled at her. “You know, I had no idea you were so good at this. You could be in the guards whenever you chose.”
Chrissie dimpled. “I could try,” she said. “But I don't think I'd be good at following orders. I only do what my heart tells me.”
“You taught me the same, Mother,” Alf nodded. “And I am glad.” His eyes, looking at Ambeal, were full of light.
Ettie swallowed hard, seeing the beauty of the tenderness between them. Yes, she thought. It was the only way to live. And Alf following his heart meant she could, too. If Brodgar could come safely back to them. Where was he?