Chapter Seven
Janie
I couldn’t believe that I was standing in Dylan’s apartment. It was nothing like I thought it would be. It was a lot homier than I would have imagined. His living room looked like my grandparents, with an older brown sofa, some big clunky wooden tables and a big red Persian rug. It looked nice, but a lot older than I would have thought he would have gone for. I wondered if he had inherited most of the furniture. I can’t imagine that he would have picked the furniture himself. I wanted to ask him, but I didn’t want to offend him.
“So, welcome to my abode.” He waved his arms wide and grinned.
“Thanks for having me,” I said formally, a shy smile on my face as my heart raced. What was I doing here and what did I expect was going to happen? Was I really going to go all the way with him? Was I going to have my first real hookup? I mean, I guess I had kinda hooked up with Nate all those years ago, but I hadn’t known that was a hookup at the time. My heart stopped for a second as I thought back to that time in my life. The heartache, the pain, the rejection and confusion that I’d felt. It still amazed me now that Nate and I were friends, best friends even, after everything we’d been through. I’d never admit it, but I still felt hurt when I thought about how he’d treated me in college. But he’d been young and dumb and hadn’t known how badly he was going to hurt me. At least that was what he’d said when we’d met up again years later.
“What’s on your mind?” Dylan asked me with a small smile as he walked closer to me.
“Nothing.” I shook my head quickly. No way I could tell him that I was here thinking about some guy that had broken my heart years ago. “So, are you going to show me around?”
“There’s not much to be seen, but sure.” He laughed. “Follow me, madam.” He grabbed my hand and headed toward the kitchen. It was small, but surprisingly pristine.
“Do you cook in here at all?” I laughed as I stared at the perfect white marble countertops.
“I’m actually a really good cook.” He laughed as he nodded and watched my shocked face with humor.
“Oh yeah, what’s your best dish?” I asked him, wondering if he was leading me on. Was he really a good cook or was he just saying that?
“I make a mean lasagna.” He winked. “That comes from having an Italian nonna.”
“Oh, I love lasagna.” I beamed. “Do you make cannoli as well?”
“Not very well.” He laughed. “I do make good bread sticks though and garlic cheese bread.”
“Sounds delicious,” I said and I was about to say I couldn’t wait to try his food sometime, but I stopped myself. I had no idea if he was ever going to want to see me again. Let alone cook dinner for me. This wasn’t exactly a conventional sort of first date. Certainly it wasn’t following the wooing protocol. This was a one-night stand hookup if anything. I felt slightly sad about that. I would have liked to have gotten to know Dylan better. I wasn’t really looking for a hookup, but right now I figured what could it hurt?
“Do you like to cook?” he asked me inquisitively.
“I do, but I’m not the best. I do have some signature dishes though.” I grinned.
“Oh, what are they?” His eyes lit up and he stared at me with such interest that I could feel my body warming up at his attention. It felt nice. It was awesome to be in the company of a hot guy and it was even nicer that he was expressing an interest in me as well, like he really cared. In reality, this was most probably part of his game, but I didn’t care. Right now, it felt nice to be on the receiving end of attention from a hot male. I knew that was pathetic of me, but I didn’t care.
“I make a mean roast chicken and roasted potatoes. In fact, a roast anything.” I giggled. “I make the best roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. That must be from my English grandparents.” I smiled. “And I make a yummy spotted dick.”
“Spotted dick?” He raised an eyebrow at me.
“Yeah, it’s a dessert.” I laughed. “Don’t go getting any ideas.”
“Oh, I wasn’t.” He winked at me. “Though if you like a spotted dick, you’re going to be disappointed with mine.”
“Sorry, what? Disappointed with what?”
“My dick,” he said with a deadpan face. “It’s not spotted.”
“Oh.” My face went bright red and I looked away embarrassed and suddenly nervous. He sure was forward.
“Want to see my bedroom now?” he asked and grabbed my hand without even waiting for a response.
“Uhm …” My voice trailed off. Shit! This was it. He was about to devour me. He was about to take me to his bed. I was about to have my first real one-night stand. Shit, was it acceptable for me to ask him if he’d had an STD test lately? And could I ask to see it? No, I couldn’t, could I? I started to feel panicked. And could I inspect the condom packets, to make sure they hadn’t expired. And that they weren’t some cheap knock-off brand. Oh God, I could feel myself starting to heat up and not in an excited sense. This wasn’t as thrilling and as sexy as I thought it would be. I was too old and sensible to just jump into bed with some guy, no matter how good looking he was. And boy was he good looking, just staring at his face had me feeling some sort of way. In my dreams, I could fuck him with no worries. I imagined it would be blissful. I imagined that it would be …
“So, what do you think?” he asked, once again interrupting my thoughts as we walked into his bedroom. I looked around in surprise. He had a queen-sized bed with a light cream duvet cover. He had posters on the wall, prints of impressionist art. I was pretty sure that I recognized Monet. He didn’t strike me as a Monet guy. He had some books on his nightstand. I was surprised to see that one of them was The Count of Monte Cristo.
“You’re reading The Count of Monte Cristo?” I asked him awkwardly.
“Yeah.” He let go of my hand and walked over to the bed. He sat down and grabbed the book and opened it. “Though to be honest, it’s going slowly. I’ve been reading it since high school.”
“What?” I started laughing. “Did I hear you correctly?”
“I know, I know. I’m embarrassed.” He made a sheepish face. “What can I say? It’s a long book.”
“It’s not that long.” I laughed and walked over to him. “Let me see how many pages it is.”
“It’s about a billion gazillion pages.”
“Oh, only a billion gazillion? I thought it was a trillion gazillion billion,” I said with a straight face.
“Oh you.” He gave me a look of endearment and before I knew what was happening, he had leaned over and was kissing me. His lips were soft and warm on mine. We leaned back on the bed and I could feel his hands on my waist and sliding up to my breasts. His lips pressed against mine harder and I could feel his tongue sliding into my mouth seductively as his fingers worked their way down in-between my legs. I kissed him back enthusiastically, he tasted sweet and he knew exactly what he was doing. My body was on fire and as he touched me in my sweetest of spots, I knew that I could definitely go all the way with this man. He was exciting and fun and he made me feel amazing. He rubbed me gently and a slight moan escaped from my mouth. Oh, but it felt so good.
“You like that, do you?” he whispered in my ear and blew gently.
“Uh huh,” I said, my mind all over the place as lust overtook me. I wanted to tell him not to stop. I wanted to tell him that it had been too long since I’d felt carnal pleasure. I almost giggled out loud as I realized I’d actually thought the words carnal pleasure. Who said things like carnal pleasure? What was I? Sixty.
“Janie,” he groaned as my hand reached over to his chest and ran down to his hard-on. “Do you even know what you’re doing to me, you sexy vixen?”
“I’m not a vixen,” I whispered, as I got even more excited by his words. I let my fingers grip his erection and I trembled as I felt him throbbing beneath me. He was so hard already. I’d made him this hard. This hot man. I felt a tremendous amount of pleasure and power at the fact that he wanted me this badly. Though, I knew I shouldn’t let it make me feel special. It was really just sex. I was pretty sure that he most probably got hard for every woman he brought back here. I wasn’t special. That made me pause for a second. What was I doing? This wasn’t special. I wasn’t special. This didn’t mean anything to him. I was just being used. But he doesn’t mean anything to you either, Janie, I thought to myself. Use him to get some. Get yours. Who cares? my inner devil whispered at me. Who cares? I do? the inner angel screamed back. I care. I don’t want to have casual sex with some random guy I just met. I don’t want this. I want a real relationship. But it’s just sex, it doesn’t have to mean anything. That’s your problem, Janie, the devil screamed back at me. Everyone does it. I don’t do it, though. A sharp pain shot through me and it twisted in my stomach. I don’t do this. I pulled away from Dylan abruptly, words sputtering from my mouth in apology.
“I’m sorry,” I said, unable to look him in the eyes. “I can’t do this.”
“Huh?” He blinked at me, the disappointment evident in his tone. “What do you mean?”
“Sorry, I’m not this kind of girl. I don’t do hookups. That’s not what I want. I just, I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry, hey, Janie, look at me.” His hands gripped my chin and he brought my face up so that I would look at him. “I know we just met, but I’m not a dog. If you’re not ready, that’s okay.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think I’m a tease or anything.”
“I don’t think that.” He shook his head, his eyes thoughtful. “Would you like something to drink? Do you want to watch a movie or something?”
“No thanks.” I shook my head. “I think I should probably just head home.”
“Oh? You can stay the night if you want. I promise we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”
“No, no, it’s fine. I just think I need to go home. Sorry.” I bit down on my lower lip. “I didn’t mean to waste your time.”
“Janie, Janie, you could never waste my time. I’ve had a great evening.” He leaned over and stroked my face. “We can go at your pace. That’s okay.”
“Uh, thanks,” I said as I jumped off of the bed. I grabbed my handbag and pulled my phone out. I had a bunch of missed texts and calls from Nate and I sighed. What did he want?
“What’s your address?” I asked Dylan. “I want to grab an Uber.”
“No, no, let me drive you home,” he said. “I’m not going to let you Uber home.”
“It’s fine. Trust me.”
“A true gentleman doesn’t let a lady go home alone.”
“Uhm, okay,” I said, not really sure how to answer that. Was he trying to say he was a true gentleman? After he’d just been feeling me up? I wanted to start giggling, but I knew that that wouldn’t be appropriate.
“Well thank you. I appreciate it,” I said as I smoothed out my clothes and brushed back my hair.
“No worries, pretty lady.” His voice was silky and while I appreciated his comment, I had to admit that it was slightly grating. How often was he going to make pretty lady or sexy lady comments? Was that all I was to him? I mean, it was nice that he found me physically attractive, but was I only my body? Was there nothing else he liked about me? I knew I was being slightly unreasonable. He didn’t even know me. What more could I really be expecting from him? If I wanted him to get to know me and my mind, I shouldn’t have agreed to meet up with him after basically what was one or two messages. We both knew what this was or what it was supposed to be. I’d just realized that I really wasn’t that kind of girl, no matter how much I had tried to convince myself that I could be. Yes, I wanted to hook up and have fun, but I wasn’t sure if I could do it without any sort of commitment whatsoever. I sighed as I realized that I was still the old-fashioned girl that I’d always been. I didn’t want to be this girl anymore. I wanted to change things up. My way just wasn’t working for me in the way that it had before. I wasn’t meeting any great guys and I wasn’t in a good relationship. I wasn’t in any relationship. And I was lonely and horny and wanted more. I was annoyed with myself for not really knowing what I wanted. Or lying to myself about what I wanted. I knew that I should speak to Anabel and get her thoughts. But I knew that she thought that the biggest problem in my life was Nate. She didn’t say it out loud, not anymore, but I knew that she hated that I’d let him back in my life, after he’d hurt me so badly. I knew it didn’t really make any kind of sense. Nate and I never should have had the sort of friendship we did now; after how he’d treated me in college. Yet, somehow it worked. We had this weird special close friendship and I had somehow learned to get over my heartache from the past. Though sometimes I did wonder, maybe it wasn’t healthy. Maybe we were too close for platonic friends. Maybe I hadn’t moved on as much as I liked to think. I didn’t know anymore. He seemed to be fine. He dated. He met new girls. He had fun. And sometimes I was okay with it and sometimes I wasn’t. Sometimes I woke up in the middle of the night feeling inextricably sad that he had someone close, someone intimate, someone he was dating that wasn’t me. Not that they ever lasted. And so my jealousy was constrained. It ebbed and flowed and I tried not to think about it.
“You seem to have a lot on your mind, huh, Janie? You seem to have drifted off again.”
“Yeah, sorry.” I made a face. “It’s just been a long week.”
“No worries. I feel ya. I’m glad you took some time out to meet me though.”
“Yeah, I had fun.” I smiled at him genuinely. “I had a really good night with you.”
“Me too. Even though I do have blue balls now.” He started laughing as my face froze in shock. “Oh Janie, if you could see your face. I’m just teasing you, love. I’m horny, but that’s okay. More to look forward to next time.” He reached a hand around my waist and pulled me toward him. His lips came down to my ear and I could feel his tongue licking before he nibbled on my earlobe. “I sure hope there is a next time,” he whispered and my toes curled in my shoes as I felt his breath so deliciously close.
“I guess we shall see,” I said softly. I wasn’t used to a man that was so full-on. “I’ve had a great evening, thanks. But I really should get going.”
“Okay, Janie. Let me get you home.” And with that he gave me a sweet smile and took a step back and walked me to the front of the apartment.
“I had a nice evening, thank you,” I said to Dylan as we stopped outside of my apartment building.
“Do you want me to come up?” he asked, a huge grin on his face as we stood there, somewhat awkwardly. I stared at his handsome face and a part of me warmed that he wanted me. A part of me wanted to say yes, come up with me. Let’s have some fun. Let’s have a good night. But then, that part of me that wasn’t as adventurous as the secret hidden part of me said no.
“I don’t think so.” I shook my head. “Sorry, I’m not ready to have you come inside.”
“No worries. It was my pleasure just to be able to spend the evening with you,” he said softly and I wondered if that was true. I wondered if he really did just want to spend time with me or if he was just saying that. “Can I get one final goodnight kiss?” he asked me, moving toward me.
Standing outside my apartment felt so awkward. I really wasn’t sure what Dylan was expecting. Did he think that I’d changed my mind and that I wanted to hook up with him after all?
“Well thanks for the ride home. It was really great meeting you. I’ve had such a great time with you.”
“I guess that’s my cue to leave then, huh?”
“Not to be rude or anything.” I laughed. “But I don’t think I’ll be inviting you up. Sorry.”
“No worries, Janie. I understand. You’re a good girl.”
“Hmm,” I responded with a short smile. His words felt slightly condescending and annoying. I wasn’t sure if he was mocking me or if he was being sincere. If he was being sincere then he sure didn’t come off that way. I liked him, but there was something about him that I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
“Can I get one last kiss for the road?” he asked me sweetly. And I nodded, trying not to roll my eyes. He really was pushing it. It was sweet, but also a bit annoying.
“Sure,” I said and closed my eyes. He leaned in and gave me a small kiss and I giggled slightly. “Good night, Dylan.”
“Night, Janie.”
***
I walked into my apartment and nearly screamed when I saw a dark shadow moving toward me from the couch. “Argh,” I cried out as I bumped my arm against the wall as I backed up in fright. My body froze as I saw the figure heading toward me.
“Janie, where the hell have you been?” Nate’s voice was deep and annoyed and I flicked the light switch on to look at his face.
“What the hell are you doing? You nearly made me faint in shock. What are you doing here?” I shouted at him. I tried to ignore the fact that he looked distractingly handsome in his blue checked shirt and jeans. His hair looked unruly and his face was glaring at me. But he still looked as hot as ever.
“Where have you been?” he growled, his face dark as he walked toward me. “Do you know what time it is?”
“Uhm no and I don’t care. What do you care?”
“Were you on a date?” He scowled at me. “I’ve been texting and calling you all night.”
“Oh my God, are you joking me right now?” I shook my head at him and rolled my eyes. “Dude, if I had texted you that much you would have told me to stop blowing up your phone.”
“You keep avoiding my question, Janie.”
“Is that why you’re here?” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Did Anabel tell you I was going on a date?”
“So, you were on a date?” He paused as he glared at me disapprovingly. “What sort of time is this?”
“Nate, you’re not my dad.” I pushed past him and headed to my couch. “What do you care?”
“Janie, you’re my best friend. You can’t just make poor decisions and think it’s okay.”
“What the …?” My jaw dropped at him. “What poor decisions are you talking about?” I sighed as I dropped down and settled back into the cushions. “Dude, you’ve lost it.”
“Janie.” He walked toward me and sat down next to me on the couch, his blue eyes looked angry and concerned at the same time. “I am not happy right now.” He stared at me for a few seconds and I swallowed hard as I gazed at his lips. All of a sudden, I was taken back to a previous time. I could feel a warmness in my belly as I sat there wondering why he was so hot and bothered after everything we’d been through.
“I think you should give me my key back.” I glared at him. “You can’t just be letting yourself into my apartment whenever you feel like it.”
“This was an emergency.” His expression was stoney. “And no, you’re not getting your key back.”
“If I want my key back, I can have it back.” I shook my head at him. “You can’t tell me no. It’s my key.”
“I just told you no.”
“Nate,” I growled at him. “My key?”
“What did you and Dylan do tonight?” He almost shouted at me and I jumped back, surprised by his anger.
“What is your problem dude?” I rolled my eyes at him and then paused. “Hey, how did you know I went on a date with Dylan?” My eyes narrowed. “I never told you his name.”
“What does it matter?” He looked away for a brief second. “Did you sleep with him?”
“Are you insane?” I poked him in the shoulder. “You can’t ask me that.”
“I just did.” His eyes stared into mine intently. “Did you?”
“What do you care?” I was starting to get really annoyed and confused. “We’re just friends, Nate.”
“I know that, obviously,” he said with a cold voice. “I think I’m the one that decided that we should just be friends.”
“Wow, low blow.” I recoiled at his statement. “Thanks for that.”
“I’m sorry, that came out wrong.” His face looked pained and his blue eyes softened. “I’m sorry for that. I just meant when we were in college you were all over me and you slept with me very quickly and I don’t want you to make that mistake again.”
“Okay, so you’re calling me a slut and reminding me that you rejected me?” I stood up, my body feeling hot and my face red. “You need to leave, Nate.”
“I’m not calling you a slut. I just know how Dylan is.” He sighed.
“How do you know Dylan? What’s going on here?” I looked down at him, my chest heaving now. “I’m so confused.”
“Anabel told me you were going online, to join a dating app.” He made a face. “She showed me your profile. Dylan is a college buddy of mine, one you never met and well, I thought it might be nice for you to have some dates.” He sighed. “I know you’ve been down because you have no options.”
“Wow, you think I have no options?” I shook my head at him in disbelief. He really thought I was some kind of loser.
“No, no. I just mean you haven’t dated anyone in a while and I didn’t know how the online dating would go for you, so I thought it would be cool if he hit you up and took you on a few dates.” He made a face. “That’s all it was meant to be. A way to boost your ego.”
“So you thought no one else would ask me out?”
“That’s not what I’m saying.” He shook his head. “Sit down, please. You’re making me nervous just standing there watching me like that.”
“I’m making you nervous? Really?” I started laughing. “Do you frigging hear yourself, Nate? You’re so frigging annoying.”
“Don’t be mad at me, Janie.” He grabbed my hands and pulled me down onto the couch next to him. “I don’t want you to go and start ignoring me again.”
“Ignoring you again? When have I ignored you?” I blinked at him.
“You know.” He made a face.
“No? When?”
“Back in college.”
“Oh.” I stifled a sigh. I didn’t want to think about that again right now. “Well, you deserved it. You blew me off for another girl and you didn’t even care.”
“Of course I cared.” He made a face. “It’s not like we were exclusive.”
“Uh huh.” I looked away from him as his hand came down on mine. He squeezed it and his warm touch made me flush.
“Look at me, Janie,” he said softly and I glanced over at him. His eyes were warm and concerned and I could feel myself sinking into his mysterious depths. His face was handsome and dark and I looked down at his chest. I could feel butterflies in my stomach as I looked at his muscular pecs and biceps. He had been handsome as a college guy, but now he was absolutely gorgeous. I tried not to remember what it had felt like making love to him. How he’d held me so strongly and capably as he slid inside of me. My entire body flushed as I remembered him sucking on my breasts. I had to stop this line of thought. It wasn’t good. At all. Especially seeing as I’d just been making out with Dylan. I really was a slut. “I want you to know just how sorry I am for what happened in the past.” He sounded sincere. “I was immature and young and I regret how I treated you.” He sighed. “I never want anything like that to happen to us again. You’re my absolute best friend and I care about you. I shouldn’t have interfered with Dylan. That was a mistake. He’s just not a good guy.” He sighed. “He’s a player and you deserve someone better than a player.”
“Maybe right now I don’t care. Maybe right now I just want to have some fun,” I said petulantly.
“Not a good idea.” He shook his head and we just stood staring at each other and glaring. I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to tell him off for acting like I was a child or some desperado, yet I didn’t know what to say. We were so close, yet there were some times that I felt that our relationship was precarious. There were certain things that we couldn’t say to each other. Certain things that still felt out of bounds, given our past.
“Most people would be happy to have a friend that would drop everything to check up on them.” Nate gave me a smug look after a few seconds and I couldn’t stop myself from snorting in exasperation.
“Dude, it’s the middle of the night and there was no reason for you to think I was in trouble.”
“I’ve been texting you all night and calling you. I thought something was wrong.” He glared at me.
“No, you didn’t.” I rolled my eyes. “But anyway, you see I’m fine. So you can feel satisfied with that.”
“Yeah,” he muttered, though he looked anything but satisfied. “Can I stay over tonight?”
“Nate.” I made a face at him. “Really?”
“It’s late and I don’t want to drive back home.” He grinned at me. “We can play chess if you want.”
“Haha, very funny.” I rolled my eyes at him.
“Or we could watch a movie.”
“You just said you were tired.” I gave him a pointed look.
“Janie, stop being difficult.”
“I’m not being difficult,” I said and folded my arms. “You’re being difficult.”
“What do you want to watch? Your pick.” He grinned at me and I could feel my anger ebbing away. It was hard to stay mad at Nate’s handsome face.
“Well, we can watch the movie if you give me more info on Dylan,” I said wickedly, secretly pleased by the angry look that passed over his face. “Seeing as I’m a desperado and can’t get any other guys.”
“Janie, you know that’s not what I meant.” Nate grunted. “I don’t want to talk about Dylan.”
“Oh well, you wanna stay over?” I raised an eyebrow at him. “Then you talk.”
“Fine.” He shook his head and huffed. “You win.”
“Yeah,” I mumbled under my breath. “This is me winning. Big time.” I pointed a finger at him. “Come with me to the bedroom. I put my smart TV in my room so I can watch Netflix at night. We’ll have to watch it in there.”
“Fine,” he said as he followed me to my room. “I’m going to take my jeans off, okay?”
“Whatever.” I shrugged. “I’ve seen you in less.”
“Yes, you have.” He winked at me and I could feel my face flushing.
“Here’s the remote.” I handed it to him before sitting down in front of my vanity. “I need to remove my makeup before we start though.”
“Why do you put on so much of that gunk?” He made a face at me. “You look so much better without it.
“Uh huh.” I rolled my eyes. “That’s what every guy says until they actually see a girl without makeup.”
“I’ve seen you without makeup,” he said softly. “You’re beautiful.”
“Thanks.” I blushed and looked away from him quickly as my stomach started to soar. Why did he say these things to me? They always got me so confused. And I didn’t need to add confusion about our relationship to the mix right now.
I tried not to watch Nate as he took off his clothes, but it was hard to ignore the fact that he was practically naked as he stood there in his dark gray briefs and nothing else. He sat on the edge of the bed and stretched and I swallowed hard as I stared at his taut chest muscles. There was a sprinkling of hair on his chest that I remembered well and I tried to forget how it had felt to run my fingers down his pecs to his abdomen. I tried to forget what it felt like to have him inside of me, kissing me, pulling my hair, whispering my name. That had been years ago and I remembered that he’d been a good lover. I could only imagine how great he must be now with more experience. I felt a twinge of pain as I thought about him sleeping with other women. I could not let myself feel jealous. It had no place in our friendship. I quickly turned back to study my face in the mirror as I cleaned off my makeup. I needed to think about something else.
“So what do you want to watch?” Nate turned on my TV and clicked through to the Netflix screen. “Did you have anything in mind, seeing as you said you wanted to choose?”
“Give me some options,” I said not looking up. “I don’t want a horror movie.”
“What?” he said in a mock surprise voice. “I thought you loved them.”
“Uh huh.” I giggled. “You know how much I love them.”
“Do you remember that time we watched a horror movie and you screamed so loud that they escorted us out of the movie theater?”
“I’m trying to forget.” I turned around and glared at him. “That was so embarrassing.”
“That was funny.” He laughed and then paused. “That was right after we became friends again.” His voice was soft. “Do you remember that?”
“How could I forget?” I tried to keep my voice light. “If only we could go back to that day,” I joked.
“What do you mean?” His voice sounded serious all of a sudden. “Do you regret becoming friends with me again?”
“I don’t know that we can say again,” I said, trying to keep my voice light. “We weren’t exactly friends before.”
“We weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend though.” His voice sounded defensive.
“Maybe not technically,” I said. “At least in your eyes. However, to me, I felt like we were boyfriend and girlfriend. We made love. We hung out all the time. We were dating. I just assumed …” My voice trailed off. “Hey, but it’s not important now.”
“I regret how I treated you back then.” He sighed. “I should have handled things differently. I shouldn’t have stood you up that night. I fucked up royally. And when you stopped talking to me and responding, well, it took me a long time to get over it.”
“Yeah?” I turned around and looked at him. “Really?”
“Really.” He nodded. “I think the best day in my life was bumping into you in that bank line that day. You had to talk to me and then when you agreed to go for a coffee with me …” He grinned. “I was ecstatic. I felt like I got my second chance. And my best friend back.”
“We weren’t best friends before,” I said and rolled my eyes.
“But we are now.” He raised an eyebrow at me. “Right?”
“Yeah, you know you and Anabel are my best friends,” I said as I nodded my head.
“So why did you tell Anabel about your date and not me?” He stood up and walked closer to me. He stopped and then crouched down so he was staring in my eyes. “I’m sorry for overreacting. I’m just really protective of you.”
“I’m a grown woman, Nate.” I reached over and ran my hands through his hair before I could stop myself. “You know I appreciate your care and concern, but you can’t just overreact like that.” I shook my head at him. “And what’s up with the creepy match thing with Dylan? Telling him to message me.”
“So you’re not going to see him again?” Nate looked hopeful. “You think he’s creepy?”
“No, that’s not what I said.” I leaned back awkwardly as I realized my fingers were now trailing down the side of his face. I quickly grabbed my hairbrush and started brushing my hair. “He’s hot and seems fun. He’s just what I need right now.”
“But he’s not looking for a relationship.”
“So, neither am I.” I shrugged.
“Janie.” He sighed. “Yes, you are.”
“Well, I mean kinda …” I looked down. “I just want some company right now. You know how it is.”
“So you really just want a hookup?” He gave me a look. “Really?”
“Yeah. I do,” I said adamantly and maybe a bit petulantly. I knew as soon as I said the words that it wasn’t true, but I wasn’t going to let Nate know that. He couldn’t be right all the time. It wasn’t good for his ego or mine.
“Well if you’re really in need of someone to just hookup with, I can be of service.” He gave me a mischievous look and I almost melted.
“What are you saying, Nate?”
“Whatever you want me to be saying?” He moved closer to me and his eyes twinkled as he stared at me. “What do you want to do?”
“Nate, stop being a goofball.” I pushed him away and jumped up and walked away from him. “You have a girlfriend and you’re a silly tease.” I walked over to the bed and sat down. “You’d be in trouble if I actually said yes.”
“Maybe I want you to say yes.” He came over to the bed and sat down next to me. “Maybe it will be like old times.”
“Maybe I don’t want it to be like old times,” I said and glared at him. “Those memories aren’t so great for me?”
“Oh really? Are you saying the sex wasn’t good?”
“Nate.” I swallowed hard as I admonished him. “This is inappropriate.”
“Why?” he whispered as he glanced at me. “It’s not like we don’t both know and remember that we’ve had sex.”
“Nate! That was years ago,” I stuttered. “We shouldn’t be talking about this.”
“Fine,” he said and then leaned over and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “I’m just saying if you need to get laid, I’m here. I think I’m a better bet than Dylan.”
“Uh huh.” I rolled my eyes. “Would you really want to go there again and possibly ruin our friendship?”
“I wouldn’t do anything to risk our friendship,” he said seriously. “You know that.”
“Do I?” I mumbled as I walked over to my closet and pulled out a long T-shirt that Nate had given me a long time ago. I loved sleeping in it and he knew it. “Close your eyes.” I turned around and looked at him.
“Why?” He grinned at me.
“Because I’m about to change.”
“So?”
“Nate!”
“Yes, Janie.”
“You’re too much.”
“Or just enough?” He started laughing, but I watched as he closed his eyes. “So, I was thinking about something that I think will be really cool.”
“Oh, what’s that?” I asked, staring at him as I quickly pulled off my clothes. I wanted to make sure that he wasn’t peeking at me as I slipped off my jeans, top and bra.
“You want to go on vacation with me this year?” he asked nonchalantly as if it were something we did every day.
“Where?” I said as I slipped the T-shirt on.
“I was thinking Belize, they have some really cool diving and snorkeling.”
“Oh, I don’t scuba though.”
“You could learn or snorkel,” he said. “Can I open my eyes yet?”
“Yeah,” I said as I pulled the T-shirt down. All of a sudden it felt a lot shorter than it ever had before. It covered my butt and stopped at mid-thigh, but the way Nate was looking at me as he opened his eyes, made me feel like I was naked.
“That’s my T-shirt.” He grinned as he stared at me. He stood up and walked over to me and stopped right in front of me. “New York Yankees, baby,” he said as he reached over and ran his hands over the words at the front. His fingers lightly ran over my breasts and I swallowed hard as my nipples reacted to his touch. “I forgot I gave you this T-shirt.”
“Oh?” I said, staring up at his lips.
“Wait, did I give it to you or did you steal it from me?” He grinned and I could feel the heat of his bare chest next to my body.
“You gave it to me,” I lied and he chuckled softly, moving even closer to me.
“Liar.” He leaned down and whispered against my lips. His blue eyes were a mere inch away from mine and I could feel his warm breath against me. His body was now brushing up against me and I could feel something hard against my stomach where his boxers pressed into me. I tried not to think about what it was.
“I’m not lying.” I rolled my eyes and forced myself to look away. “What are we going to watch?” I brushed past him and walked over to the bed. “Have you decided?”
“No,” he said and I could hear him behind me. “Nice ass,” he said and I felt his hand lightly patting my ass.
“Nate.” I turned around and glared at him. “What are you doing?”
“What do you mean?” he said innocently.
“You know.” I pointed at him and I saw his eyes dropping to my breasts, as they strained against the T-shirt.
“No bra, huh?” He laughed as he looked up at me.
“Excuse me?” I blushed, wishing I had kept my bra on now.
“Nothing.” He grinned. “So, Belize?”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “Who else is going?”
“Who else?” He paused for a second. “We could invite Anabel.”
“What about your girlfriend?”
“I don’t have a girlfriend, Janie.”
“The girl you’re dating then.” I rolled my eyes. “The one you want me to join you for brunch with.”
“We can invite her.” He frowned. “If that’s what you want.”
“What about Dylan?” I said, annoyed that he said he was going to invite the girl he was dating. I’d been hoping he would say he was done with her.
“Dylan?” His eyes darkened and he looked annoyed. “You’ve only met him once.”
“So?”
“Why would you want him to come?” He glared at me.
“So he can make me come,” I said softly and his eyes widened as he stared at me. I knew he couldn’t believe that I’d just said that. I couldn’t believe it either. We stared at each other for a few seconds and then I watched as he jumped onto the bed and grabbed the remote control.
“Well think about Belize,” he said finally after a minute or so. “We can figure out details next week.”
“I haven’t even said yes yet,” I said as I got onto the bed next to him.
“You will.”
“Whatever,” I said as I pulled the duvet down and got under the covers. Nate slipped in under the covers next to me and we both sat up slightly and glanced at the screen. “So what are you putting on?”
“I don’t know. What do you want to watch?”
“Let’s watch, Bridesmaids,” I said with a grin.
“Oh no way.” He shook his head. “What about Dunkirk?”
“The war movie?” I gave him a look. “I’m not watching a war movie before bed.”
“What about Basic Instinct?”
“Basic Instinct, that old movie with Sharon Stone?”
“Yeah.” He nodded.
“No thanks.” I shook my head. “What else?”
“Buttman Does Rio.” He winked at me.
“Nate!” I shook my head at him. “Be serious.”
“I am being serious.” He laughed and he reached down and squeezed my butt from the side. “You know I’m a butt man.”
“Nate.” I pushed his hand away. “Whatever.”
“True, you’re right.”
“Right about what?” I asked him in confusion.
“I’m more of a boob guy than a butt guy.”
“Okay.” I turned toward him. “You’re an idiot you know that, right?”
“What do you prefer?”
“Huh?” I asked. “Out of breasts and butts?” I pretended ignorance.
“No goofy, on men?” He put the remote down and leaned toward me. “Chest or butt?”
“Maybe I prefer something else.”
“Oh?” He moved even closer to me and I could feel his body next to mine as we stared at each other. I was starting to feel turned on and I knew that this was not the best position for us to be in. In fact, it was a very very dangerous one.
“We don’t need to talk about this now,” I said, trying to change the subject.
“What do you prefer?” His face leaned closer to mine and I felt his hand on my waist, making my T-shirt ride up a little bit.
“Maybe I prefer biceps,” I said trying to wiggle away but ending up even closer to him. My breasts were now pushed up against his chest and I tried to breathe normally.
“Or you prefer biceps over the D then?” He chuckled and I felt him pushing into me. I very much knew in that moment what the hard object pushing into my stomach was.
“The D?” I said teasingly, knowing that I should stop playing with fire, but not wanting to stop.
“The dick?” he said, his hand now moving down from my waist and to my legs. I felt his fingers on my bare skin as he slipped his hand under my T-shirt and up the side of my legs. “Also known as the penis or the cock.”
“I see.” I rolled my eyes at him.
“You didn’t answer my question,” he said, as we both pretended to ignore the fact that his hand was now running across my bare stomach. His fingers were light to the touch and I was barely breathing.
“Your question?” I swallowed hard.
“Biceps or dick?”
“Nate, that is not appropriate.” I shook my head and I felt his fingers sliding down again over my ass and lightly squeezing.
“Isn’t it?” He said as his fingers moved in and started stroking my inner thighs. “Is this appropriate?”
“Nate.” I held my breath as his fingers moved closer to my private area and brushed gently against me. I knew he could feel the wetness in my panties as I heard his intake of breath as he rubbed me for a few seconds and then moved his fingers away.
“You’re still the sexiest woman I know,” he said as his lips brushed against mine.
“Nate.” I kissed him back softly, knowing I shouldn’t kiss him back, but unable to stop myself. “We shouldn’t.”
“We shouldn’t?” He kissed me harder this time, his tongue entering my mouth for a few brief seconds. I succumbed to his kiss, letting myself go with abandon. It felt delicious. So right in this moment. My body pressed against his harder and my hands flew to his hair. It had been so long since we’d kissed. So long since we’d touched. And it felt amazing. Even better than it had before.
“Oh Janie, you’re so sexy.” He groaned as he leaned back and I felt his hands pulling up my T-shirt. I didn’t stop him as he threw it to the ground. His hands reached up to my breast and his fingers deftly started playing with my nipples. I moaned as he leaned down and took my right nipple in his mouth. I closed my eyes as he sucked and bit down gently. It felt so good and I just couldn’t stop myself. He moved his mouth to my other breast and started sucking and my body writhed on the bed. He knew exactly what he was doing because he then reached down and slipped his fingers into my panties and started rubbing my clit. “You’re so wet for me.” He grunted as he looked up at me. I glanced at him, unable to respond and closed my eyes as he slipped a finger inside of me. “I want to make you come, Janie.” He fingered me and rubbed my clit with his thumb at the same time. “Open your eyes and look at me,” he said and I opened my eyes and stared down at him. “I’m going to take your panties off, okay?” he asked softly as I stared at him, my body hot and trembling. I nodded my assent and he grinned as he pulled my panties off quickly. The duvet thrown to the side of the bed. He stared down at my naked body on the bed and grinned.
“You’re so fucking sexy.” He groaned and I watched as he pulled his boxer shorts off. His cock was hard and thick and I couldn’t keep my eyes off of it as he stood there in front of me. “Lean back,” he commanded as he pushed my shoulders back on the bed. He reached down and grabbed my legs and opened them wide. “I’m going to make you come like you’ve never come before.”
“Nate.” I moaned as I felt his head between my legs. His tongue was running across me gently, making every part of my body tremble with excitement and anticipation.
“Shhh,” he said before I felt his tongue enter me. I felt the first wave of pleasure hit me right away as his tongue moved in and out of me quickly and I leaned down and rubbed the top of his head, pulling at his hair roughly as my body buckled underneath him. My legs closed in on his head as I felt my orgasm about to hit and I groaned out loud as his tongue left me and he sat up. He looked down at me and kissed me on the lips as he positioned his body over me. I felt his cock rubbing against my clit now, teasing me as he kissed me and I wrapped my legs around him tighter, wanting him to enter me. I could feel the head of his cock at my entrance and my body stilled with anticipation. He leaned up slightly and thrust into me with one hard deep movement.
“Awwww,” I cried out as he entered me. My hands gripped his shoulders as I moaned.
“I told you that I’d be a better bet than Dylan.” He grunted down at me as he pulled out and slammed into me again. “If you needed a hookup, you should have come to me.”
I froze as I stared up at him. “What the hell, Nate?” I pushed hard against his shoulder and stared at him in anger and disappointment. “What the royal fuck?” He rolled off of me and gave me a look.
“Wrong thing to say?” He looked sheepish and sexy at the same time. My body protested at the loss of him, but my brain was seething.
“Ya think?” I shook my head at him. “Definitely. This was a bad idea.”
“Janie.” He sighed and he stroked my shoulder. “Sorry.”
“Uh huh.” I just stared at him. “You really are an idiot.”
“I know,” he muttered and I felt his hand sliding in between my legs again.
“Nate.” I shook my head at him as he rubbed my clit. “We’re not doing this now.”
“I know.” He groaned as he continued to rub me. “One of us should at least get off though.”
“Nate,” I moaned but I didn’t push his hand away. It felt too good to stop him.
“Turn around,” he said and I obeyed him so that he was spooning me. One of his hands remained between my legs rubbing while the other one wrapped around my breasts and played with my nipples. I closed my eyes and wiggled my ass against his cock, enjoying the fact that he was still hard. I smiled to myself as I teased him. He moaned and started fingering me and within seconds I felt myself coming and shuddering next to him. My entire body felt satiated and calm in that moment and I could feel myself falling asleep, not even caring that his body was pressed against mine tightly and that he would have to fall asleep with blue balls. Not even caring that I’d kissed him and Dylan both in the same night. I was a new Janie. I was going to embrace it.