Twenty-three

Roan’s silence worried her.

Marley glanced up into his gray eyes. “Isn’t that what you want? What we both decided?”

“I don’t think rushing into marriage is wise at the moment.” His voice was gentle. “You’re reacting out of hurt and anger, not because you want to make a lifetime commitment to me.” He cupped the side of her face, and she leaned into his hand. God, she loved his touch on her skin. “Besides, where will we live? I don’t know what you want, but I see us on our own land. The money I won will help, but it’s not enough. My Texas Star, we have plans to make.”

She released a pent-up breath. “You’re right. We need to plan. Hold me, Roan.”

He planted a kiss in her hair. “You’ll have to pry my arms loose.”

“That’s why I love you.” She snuggled into his warmth.

Light filtered through the curtains of Marley’s small house. She stirred in Roan’s arms. They’d spent the night on the sofa, her head on his shoulder, the quilt keeping them warm. She felt drugged and weary. Too much had happened to take in, and she had no idea where this new road would lead her.

Roan’s eyes met hers. “Good morning, sleeping beauty. I couldn’t find my pirate ship.”

“I’m glad you helped me make it through the night.” She got up to stand at the window. The ranch looked the same as it always had, but she knew it never could be again. Something inside her had changed. Duel came from his house and stared in her direction, although she knew he couldn’t see her. “Besides, sleeping beauty lived in a castle,” she murmured.

“So she did.” Roan came up from behind and put his arms around her. He kissed the back of her neck.

“He’s standing out there, looking so sad and alone.” She swallowed hard. “What am I supposed to do now? I don’t feel like Marley McClain. I don’t know me.”

“Duel is still the same father you’ve always loved. He’s hurting real bad too, Marley. I think you need to go talk to him. You both have things to say.”

“Maybe.”

“Nothing can be settled without hashing it out. Go to him, Marley,” Roan urged.

She turned. “About last night. I shouldn’t have asked you to marry me.” She wrinkled her nose. “Just chalk it up to distress and nerves.”

He tucked a tendril of hair behind her ear, studying her face. “It’s already forgotten.”

“We have plenty of time, and when we marry, it’ll be for the right reason.”

“When did you get so smart?” He released her. “Go talk to Duel.”

“I should. And Mama…Jessie needs help with breakfast.”

Roan walked with her to the door and opened it. “Don’t close your mind or your heart.”

She nodded and took a deep breath, then left the house. Duel watched her approach, and the slump of his shoulders and sadness in his amber eyes was painful to see.

“How are you, Marley?” he asked in his deep voice. He started to reach for her, but instead dropped his arms to his sides. What she wouldn’t give to go back to their easy way with each other.

“In truth, I don’t know how I am. I have so many feelings racing through me. I don’t know who I am anymore. I grew up always knowing and taking comfort in the fact that I was a McClain. Even on the scariest, darkest night I found security belonging here. Now…”

“You’re still Marley McClain, if you want to be. I legally adopted you. There’s nothing wrong with the name.”

“I know.” Her gaze scanned the rolling pastures. Suddenly, it hit her. Aces ’n’ Eights. Duel had named the ranch for the hand he’d won her with. The dead man’s hand. Her lips quivered, and she raised her hand to still them. When she could speak, she said, “I always thought the name of this ranch was odd. Was it to remind yourself of the fact that I wasn’t your daughter?”

Duel released a cry that sounded like a wounded animal. “I gave it this name to celebrate the day you came into my heart. To remind myself that I wasn’t alone anymore, that I had a daughter whom I loved with every fiber of my being.” He blinked hard and raised his head. “I won’t apologize for that. Not for one second.”

As though unable to bear the pain that must be on her face, he swung his gaze toward the distance.

Whether he was her father or not, she loved this man with all her heart and soul. She remembered a night, she must’ve been about nine or ten, when she’d had a high fever. Her throat had been so swollen it wouldn’t allow more than a drop of anything through. Duel had kept warm rags smeared with a salve around her throat even though he’d had an important trip to make the next day.

Another time he’d ridden ten miles in the dead of night in the pouring rain to get the doctor. He’d come down with a horrible fever from the ordeal. Time after time, Duel had sacrificed his own well-being for her. He must’ve dreaded this moment since the day he’d brought her home, afraid to keep the secret but afraid to tell.

He turned back to her, in control of his feelings again. “I’m sorry I kept the truth from you. I just wanted you to never doubt that you belonged here. This is your home,” he rasped. “Everything Jessie and I did was for you, to give you the best life we could. There was never a moment that I didn’t love you.”

Tears welled in her eyes. “Can I still be your daughter, Papa? If you’ll have me?”

With a low cry, he put his arms around her. “Always. Always.”

Peace surrounded her, the quiet after a horrible storm. Marley still had things to work through, but she had strength now for the task. She clutched his work shirt, soaking up the smell of shaving cream and coffee. “I love you, Papa. Even last night when I felt so betrayed and angry, I couldn’t bring myself to hate you.”

“I was so afraid that you’d leave, and I couldn’t bear to think of that.” He cleared his throat. “But Jessie told me to keep my faith in you. She said you’re still the girl we raised.”

At mention of her mama, Marley jerked back. “Oh my goodness, I forgot about breakfast.”

Duel chuckled low in his throat. “It’ll keep. But my cows won’t. I’ve got to get moving. See you later, Two Bit.”

The pet name he’d called her when she was a child left a thickness in her chest. They shared much more than a last name. He was her father in every sense of the word. A real father made sacrifices and held his children close—he didn’t wager his child in a game of chance.

She paused with her hand on the door, watching Duel head out to meet his day. And stepping from the bunkhouse, falling in step, Roan matched Duel stride for stride.

The two men represented her whole world. Both were tough and fearless, and she admired and loved them.

Jessie glanced up when Marley entered the kitchen. Her mama’s gaze searched her eyes. “Are you all right, honey?”

“I just had a private talk with Papa. I’m not angry at him or you anymore. The shock of finding out how I came to be here knocked me flat. I want to talk to you about it—I want to hear how you came into the picture and when—but not now. Let’s get the children fed and off to school.”

“Sure, honey. I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.” Jessie turned, cracking eggs into the cast-iron skillet. “I already have the biscuits on, and the bacon’s ready.”

Surprise swept through Marley. “You must’ve been up for a while.”

“We never went to bed. We sat up all night talking. Your father ate an hour ago.”

“Then I’ll go upstairs and help the little ones into their clothes.” But instead of moving in that direction, she went to hug Jessie and kiss her cheek. “I love you, Mama.”

* * *

Change had come to the Aces ’n’ Eights. Duel seemed certain that Will Gentry was lurking about, ready to inflict harm, so until the man was caught, Hardy would deliver the children to school in the buckboard. Duel had also expressed concerns about Marley leaving the ranch and said she’d have an armed escort whenever she did.

That suited Marley. The thought of running into Gentry again chilled her blood, and the children had also picked up on her fears. Matt had crawled into her lap that morning and snuggled against her.

“I’m scared, Mama Rose,” he’d said. “The bad man will get me.”

She’d hugged him and told him that Papa Duel and all the men would keep them safe, and he didn’t have to worry. All while she’d calmed his fears, her thoughts were on herself. She was the one Gentry wanted, and a knot sat in her stomach.

True, she’d been in shock last night, but she’d heard his diabolical vow to auction her off to the highest bidder.

Memories of the random gunshots in San Saba crept across her mind. If he’d wanted to make money off her, why would he want to kill her? That must’ve been someone else. But who?

After the children were off to school and the housework done, Marley sat with Jessie in the parlor. They laid the babies on a quilt on the floor where they could watch them.

Jessie was the first to speak. “I know you have a lot of questions, and I hope my answers will ease your mind.” She played with her apron, bunching the fabric, then smoothing it. “I haven’t done right by you, Marley, and I know it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Bringing all these kids here was a mistake, and I see that now. Each time we added to our brood, it pushed you farther back. Neither your father nor I have given you the attention you need in quite a while.” Jessie gave a short laugh. “And the extra work has mostly landed on your shoulders. You don’t have a minute to yourself. I’m so sorry, honey.”

“I’ve never minded helping, Mama.”

“I minded asking.” Jessie rose and stared through the window as though she were looking back in time. “I know you’re curious about when I entered the picture. It was that first night that Duel had you. He’d decided to bring you back here and get his sister Vicky to help raise you. This was before she’d moved away. He had made camp and was trying to remember everything a kind woman in town had told him about babies. She’d given him a few bottles and cloths for diapers, and even let him have a goat to take on the trip to keep you in milk.”

Marley laughed. “So that’s where Cheeba came from.”

“That goat dearly tried your father’s patience. She butted him every time he bent over. That’s the scene I stumbled across.” Jessie turned, and Marley could see tears gathering in her eyes. “I was running from the law for killing my husband. He’d pressed a hot brand to my shoulder, claiming me as his property.”

Marley gasped. No wonder Jessie had never let Marley see her in a state of undress. “That’s horrible. I don’t blame you for killing him! You had to.”

“The law didn’t see it that way.” Jessie sat down next to Marley and took her hand. “Duel didn’t know any of that at the time. He just saw a desperate woman wearing a blood-soaked dress. I’m sure I was quite a sight, but he was so gentle, and he didn’t pry. I couldn’t tell him more than my first name, I was so scared of being caught and hanged. I lay down with you that night and didn’t let you go. You brought me comfort.”

“I’m glad.” Marley wanted to cry for this kind and generous woman, but she held back the tears. Something told her there was more.

“The next morning, Duel made a bargain with me—if I helped him get you to his home, he’d take me anywhere I wanted to go.” A smile lit Jessie’s eyes. “He didn’t know that there was no place else I wanted to be. That’s how I met your father and found a true knight wearing a deadly Colt in his holster.”

That story touched Marley deeply. “I’m sure he was such a handsome man. He still is.”

“No other man can hold a candle to him. But I have more, and this part is the hardest to tell.” Jessie wiped her eyes. “My first husband, Jeremiah Foltry, was a mean, heartless bastard. Looking back, I think he must have lost his mind and gone mad. He accused me of being with other men and became obsessed with me getting pregnant by one of them. Jeremiah ranted that he wasn’t going to raise another man’s child. It got worse and worse.

“I tried to escape his madness, but he caught me and chained me in the barn. He used me every night, and I did conceive. One night he flew into a rage and said even if it was his, I wasn’t fit to raise it.

“He grabbed a stick and rammed it into me. The pain made me pass out. There was so much blood. The doctor came, after, and said I’d never be able have children. That I was too badly…damaged.” Jessie’s voice broke.

Her mother’s pain was still so evident after all these years. Marley gripped her hand, crying. What both her parents had been through was unimaginable for anyone, and now she began to understand Jessie’s obsession with children.

“I longed for a child with every fiber of my being,” Jessie continued. “Then I found you, and you helped me bear the pain. Keeping busy, filling this home with love, all of it helped, and I just kept on going. A few days ago I woke up and saw how many I’d brought home and what this had done to you.”

“There is so much need, Mama. How can you turn any of them away? They need love and someone to protect them, just as I did.”

“Yes, but I shouldn’t have to take them all. There are other people and homes for orphans.” Jessie twisted her hands together.

“You just have to examine your heart.” That seemed to be the gauge for every decision. “Did they ever catch you for the murder of your husband?”

“Your Uncle Luke was a Texas Ranger back then, and he came to arrest me. I didn’t run. I saw no need. I remember how my heart broke to ride off and leave you and Duel. You both soon followed, however. There was a trial and I had to tell everything—even the most personal details—to justify why I had killed a man.”

“He wasn’t a man—he was an animal. I assume they found you innocent. You certainly had just cause!” Marley cried.

“It wasn’t easy. The presiding judge and the town were against me. Thank goodness Tom Parker defended me. His arguments won the jury over.”

Marley vaguely remembered the man she had called Grandfather Parker, though he was no kin at all. Tom had been Duel’s first wife’s father and a famous judge in Austin until his death.

Marley brought her thoughts back to the horrors and torture her mother had faced all alone. “I’m glad they didn’t convict you, Mama. That would’ve killed Papa—and me too, I imagine.”

“Probably, but I know I couldn’t have lived without either of you.” Jessie took Marley’s hand. “Come with me.”

What was her mother going to show her? Jessie went up the stairs and hurried into the bedroom she shared with Duel. Marley couldn’t imagine what more Jessie would reveal. She didn’t think she could take anything else. But the truth was bringing her and her mother together in a way that she hadn’t felt in a long while.

Her mother went to the wardrobe and pulled out a dress. “I’ve been meaning to give this to you and keep forgetting. I suspect you’ll have an occasion to wear it soon.”

The plum-colored wool-crepe creation, accented with a white fur collar, took Marley’s breath. “It’s the most beautiful dress I’ve ever seen. I don’t remember seeing you wear it.”

“Your father bought it for the governor’s ball that Tom Parker invited us to in Austin. I only wore it once and never had occasion to wear it again. After Tom died, our invitations to fancy events stopped coming.” Jessie held it against Marley. “I think it might fit you. If not, we can alter it here and there. I want you to have it.”

Marley ran her hand over the rippling, luxurious fabric. “It’s absolutely breathtaking. Are you sure, Mama?” Awestruck, she brushed her fingertips across a sprinkling of pearls sewn into the bodice. Never had she had anything so fine.

“I am. As I said, I have no need of it.” Jessie smiled. “I think you might.”

“I do have a confession. Roan and I are talking about getting married. Not right away, of course, but when the time is right.” Marley met her mother’s eyes. “I love him, Mama. I think I have since I first brought him here.”

“Roan is a smart man. How does he feel about you?”

A smile curved Marley’s lips. “Last night after we got back to the house, he told me he loved me. I slept in his arms—sitting on the sofa. Don’t worry, we did nothing inappropriate.” But how she’d wanted to. She’d hurt so badly that she’d have done most anything to feel better. She’d needed his warm touch to thaw the ice inside her.

“I saw the signs, and I think he’s a wonderful choice for you.” Worry filled Jessie’s eyes. “Only Roan is the first to admit that he’s a drifter. How sure are you that he’ll stick around?”

“I’m sure, Mama.” Marley gripped the soft fabric of the dress to her. She knew, then and there, that it would be her wedding dress.

A vision of Roan standing beside her in front of the preacher brought goosebumps. He’d be so handsome, and she’d be proud to be his wife. She couldn’t wait for the moment when she’d lay beside him with nothing between them but skin. A shiver of anticipation raced through her.

Yet, as she embraced the thought, memory of the events in San Saba sent the dream flying. Roan wouldn’t stop until he’d finished the task he’d set for himself. He knew Gentry now, and the boy beside him in the race.

Sooner or later, he’d go back to exact punishment.

Except Will Gentry was here, and after twenty years of waiting, she knew the man would easily bide his time. Watching. Waiting. Planning. And he meant to get her. Oh God!