Chapter Seven
Sometimes the Love Train can move too fast down the tracks.
Rachel sat in the waiting room of her newly hired shrink, Trent, grateful he’d made time to see her before she left for LA in the morning. The room had dark wooden floors, soft leather couches and loveseats, and the walls were painted a buttery yellow with white chair rails. Home decor and editorial magazines covered the coffee table in neat stacks. No fun gossip rags here, like in her dentist’s office. The art on the walls were colorful portraits of babbling brooks, mountains, and soothing meadows that Trent’s wife, Macy, a masterful photographer, must’ve taken. She’d recognize her friend’s style anywhere.
Rachel’s heart gave a squeeze for her friend who’d been taken too soon, and for their beautiful daughter, who’d been left motherless.
The receptionist interrupted Rachel’s musing. “The doctor will see you now, Ms. Caldwell.”
Doctor? She remembered Trent as the king of drinking games back in college.
Rachel followed behind the pretty, older woman and waited until Trent’s office door was closed behind her to greet her new doc. “That’s a very professional waiting room out there. I was just thinking how far you’d come. From the guy who could never beat me at beer pong to this.” She swept her hand to include his equally lovely office. “Who’d have thunk you’d ever be a big-time doctor?” She smiled as she settled into the chair in front of his desk.
“Shhhh.” He tapped a finger to his lips. “That’s my mother-in-law’s best friend who brought you back. She thinks I’m perfect. You burst her bubble, and I’ll be forced to remind you who always beat whom during our drinking matches.”
“Got it.” Rachel held up a hand “Wouldn’t want to let your receptionist figure out that Macy married the wildest guy on campus.”
“Yeah. Well. Nowadays, the wildest thing I do is put sugar in my coffee instead of Stevia. What’s the big emergency? Why did you want to see me so soon?”
Rachel laid her purse at her feet and then folded her hands in her lap. “I agreed to go to LA with Marcello this weekend so his publicist can spin the shocking news that he’s in love. With me. But I refused to bring in the kids until I get to the bottom of his crime.”
“Love?” Trent leaned back in his big leather chair. “I take it you haven’t told him you reciprocate that feeling?”
“No.” She would have liked to show him highlights from her favorite romance novels on the subject, but rather than reveal her secret obsession, she dug a piece of paper from her purse. “I looked online and found out there are six steps to falling in love—”
“I’m aware. That you’d feel compelled to find a logical way to deal with your emotions doesn’t surprise me, so let’s go with that. What stage do you think you’re in?”
That was the hard part. She wasn’t sure. She would have rather discussed her books with him. And ask if she was supposed to feel the same things the women did in the romance novels, or if it was normal to have different feelings. “I wanted you to help me make sense of this.”
“Make sense out of love?” He laughed. “By using a six-step plan?”
She nodded, not seeing what the heck was so funny about that. It was as close as she could find to that turkey indicator for prevention of salmonella at Thanksgiving. “This theory seems reasonable to me.”
“It’s as good as any, I suppose.” He studied her for a few moments and then drew a deep breath. “Okay. So, you’ve obviously passed the first stage, when it’s all about attraction. And based on Hannah and Ian, we can check off phase two, the part where you both decided to act on that attraction.”
“Yeah. But they call number two the early commitment stage. Where you test emotional waters. Marcello and I both agreed at the beginning of our relationship that we had no desire to marry or have kids at this point in our lives. Doesn’t that make us flunk the test right here?”
“That isn’t a test, Rachel.” Trent stood and circled his desk, then leaned against the front of it and crossed his ankles. “You guys skipped ahead a little. The next step is the one where you set boundaries for your relationship, but by becoming pregnant, you went from testing new boundaries to creating a lifelong bond with Marcello.”
She did have a lifelong bond with Marcello whether she liked it or not. He’d always be the father of her children. That was why it’d been so hard for her to move on when he’d decided he didn’t want a romantic relationship. She should have cut him out of her life but hadn’t been able to.
Rachel studied her paper again. “Number three says roles begin to become defined. And we might begin to behave like our parents? Neither of us ever wanted that either. Both of our parents had bad marriages. I think this is proof that we’re not really on the path to love.”
“Having both come from parents with bad marriages, it makes sense that neither of you thought you wanted marriage and a family, doesn’t it?”
“I guess.” A thought struck her. “Maybe that’s why Marcello changed his mind and came back. Out of some misplaced obligation? And he’s confusing that with love?”
“What obligation? You just said his parents weren’t a good role model for marriage.”
Right. Where would that moral obligation come from, then, other than maybe his heart? Marcello had a big heart.
Trent took off his glasses and polished them on his tie. After holding them up to the light, he slipped them back on again. “Stage three doesn’t have to be about your parents at all. This is the part where you figure out what your roles are in the relationship. Most people naturally start out with what they’re familiar with growing up. But that doesn’t mean you’ll end up in those roles. Number three is the stage where you communicate how you’d like to be treated. You need to do some homework on this section while you’re in LA. Tell Marcello what you expect of him, and he should do the same.”
Homework? Love was a complicated pain in her tush. “I don’t know, Trent. I still think according to this, Marcello and I might not be a good match. Long-term, anyway.”
“You’re probably right.” Trent pushed his tall frame from the desk, and then he circled back to the other side. “Things didn’t follow the pattern on your piece of paper, so best to throw in the towel, right? Go your separate ways. Watch as the other finds the right person. The one who checks off the boxes in just the right order. Sit in the back of the church while your children stand up front with Marcello as he marries another woman who’d be so much better for him than you are.”
“Ouch.” She winced at Trent’s harsh words. “I was just pointing out that maybe Marcello and I are two different people.”
“I’m sure you are. And the thought of Marcello marrying another woman wasn’t painful at all, was it?”
“It was like a stab to the heart.” She studied the paper in her hands again rather than look him in the eye. She’d come looking for excuses not to go to LA. She hadn’t even realized it until Trent shed light on it.
He leaned closer and said, “Are you worried that once he sees the real Rachel—a dedicated mom juggling her career and kids and who isn’t really as tough as she likes people to think—that he might not like who he sees? And that he might reject you?”
“Yes, because I’ve changed so much since having the twins.” Tears burned her eyes. He’d hit the bull’s-eye with that observation. “I can’t travel the world with him at the drop of a hat anymore, and I get tired, have to go to bed now instead of waiting up for his calls. I don’t have time to get my hair and nails done as often, and if it weren’t for online shopping, I’d have nothing to wear because I gained some weight after the babies. Marcello fell in love with someone else, and if he doesn’t like who I’ve become, he can have any woman he wants.”
“And yet, he still wants you.” Trent sat in his chair again. “At the end of the day, no relationship will ever work long-term if you can’t be okay with who you see in the mirror.”
“I was perfectly content with the woman in the mirror until Marcello came along. He makes me doubt myself, and I don’t understand why.”
Trent tilted his head. “I’ve wondered something. Were you a daddy’s girl?”
“How did you—Yes, I was.” A lump grew in her throat. She hadn’t thought of herself that way since her dad walked out on their family. “I was a tomboy, and Lori wasn’t. I got to do all sorts of fun things alone with my dad that she didn’t care to do. He and I were pretty close before he left.”
“You felt like you had your own identity when you were with your dad? That you were special, apart from your twin?”
“Yes. When you’re an identical twin, feeling special in your own right means the world. Especially when most look at my sister and me as clones.”
“And have you felt that special since?”
She nodded. “Marcello, when he’s not busy being famous, has this laser-like focus. He honestly listens when we talk. He never stopped doing that, even when we’d decided to part ways romantically. We never stopped being friends. But then, you probably already guessed that too, didn’t you?”
Trent’s brow hitch answered the question.
“Okay, I get it now. Marcello left and disappointed me too, but he came back. Unlike my dad. I need to decide how I feel, not try to guess Marcello’s feelings.” She folded her paper and put it away. “That’s pretty sneaky how you make me answer my own questions. But always being right is annoying, did you know that?”
“Yep.” He grinned. “It’s an added bonus that it greatly perturbs you, though.”
“Naturally.” Rachel stood to go. “I’m sure my twenty bucks has run its course, so please bill me.”
He shook his head. “I owe you, Rachel. For introducing Macy and me. You gave me the greatest gift in the world, if only for a short time. I’d like to help you find love too, if I can.”
She’d always known Trent and Macy would be perfect for each other. Maybe because she’d come to care for both of them almost as much as her siblings. “Newsflash. I introduced you guys for purely selfish reasons. I’d hoped you’d bring your roommate around more often. I had a crush on him. We’ll fight over the bill when I get back, okay?”
“Good luck.”
She nodded and headed for the door. Just as her hand landed on the knob, he called out, “Macy told me you’d bugged her for over a month to date me. That you’d promised to clean the bathroom for the rest of the semester if things didn’t work out with us. You were that sure.”
She stopped in her tracks. Without looking at him, she said, “She wasn’t supposed to tell you that. I had a rep as a hard-ass to uphold back then.”
“Newsflash. You never fooled anyone with that act.” He appeared at her side. “Macy was always grateful you’d kept badgering her.”
“Well, badgering people is one of my strengths. Ask anyone.” She opened the door, wanting to make a quick escape. Things were getting way too uncomfortable.
“Maybe you know a little more about love than you think?”
She slowly met his gaze. “I hope so, Trent. See ya.”
“Take care.”
She drew in a deep breath and waved to the receptionist as she walked by. Once in the hallway, she stopped and leaned against the wall. Was she really going to do it? Jump feetfirst into the fire and announce to the world that Marcello belonged to her?
God, she wished she had a crystal ball to tell her how things were going to turn out. But because she didn’t, she’d take the first vacation she’d had since the twins had been born and get it over with.
And hope she was doing the right thing. For her kids.
And for her.
Rachel’s moans of pleasure at the hands of the man standing over her made Marcello regret his no-sleeping-together plan. It brought memories of when he made love to her last. “See? A massage was just what we needed, bella.”
Her response, a low, sexy groan, made him smile. A full-body massage had to be better than the foot rub Lori had suggested.
Rachel, face down and limp, was all the way immersed in their couple’s massage in his home spa, but he couldn’t seem to relax. His assistant, Skye, who’d been tasked to dig up dirt on his father, reported earlier that his dad was on his way to LA. That meant it was only a matter of time before he asked to meet. And demand more money, which Marcello was going to refuse this time. He had to put an end to the blackmail.
Rachel mumbled, “Don’t let me forget. We have homework to do this weekend. Trent said so.”
“Why was that again?” He turned his head to face her as his masseuse worked his calf muscles. She’d said something about a six-step love plan being far more complicated than romance novels in the car earlier that had made no sense. He shouldn’t have kept topping off her wineglass on the plane, but she’d been so worried about leaving the kids for the weekend, he’d wanted to distract her. He’d lost count of how many drinks he’d poured her.
“We have to talk about what our roles are going to be and how we want to be treated. For the record, I like this treatment.”
“Got it. Let’s relax now and talk later, sì?”
“ ’Kay.” Rachel lifted her head, finished off her glass of champagne, and then lay down and closed her eyes again. “But we still need to name the puppies. I looked up some cartoon couples’ names because I thought the kids would like that when they’re older. It’s a little-known fact, but did you know that Pluto has a girlfriend?”
“Shocking.” He should probably hide the rest of the champagne, but she was as relaxed as he’d seen her in months, so he didn’t have the heart. “How about we name the dogs Bonnie and Clyde? They’re little thieves sometimes.”
“They are.” Rachel chuckled. “Her name is Dinah. Pluto’s girlfriend. And did you know Tarzan never used his last name? The internet said he took on Jane’s last name. But maybe just in the one movie. Very forward for back in the day. If that was true.”
Tarzan was the son of some English earl, if memory served, but she was on a roll, so he wouldn’t interrupt.
“And what about this?” She lifted a finger. “Snow White had a prince, but you never hear her use his real name, like John or Billy. Same with Wolverine. These men must have other names. Seriously, what parent would name their kid Wolverine?”
“The Big Bad Wolf?”
Rachel snorted out a laugh. “Good one.”
He needed to reel her back in. “The puppies look like little cubs. How about Simba and Nala? From The Lion King?”
“Yes!” Rachel sat up on her elbows, exposing a good portion of her soft, tempting breasts peeking over the edge of the towel. “You’re a genius. But you’ve been awful quiet since we landed.” She lay back down and ruined the fine view. “Are you worried about this weekend too?”
“Not at all.” He wanted to tell her so badly about his father. He hated keeping that one last thing from her. But he wouldn’t drag her into that dark world. And he’d never want to see the look in her eyes when he told her how he was too afraid of his father to help his mother when she’d needed it the most. He’d never forgive himself for that part. “I plan to keep us very busy this weekend. There won’t be time for any worries. Did I mention we’re going to the movies after dinner? That new one you wanted to see. With that guy you like to look at.”
Rachel, with her eyes still shut, smiled. “I think he’s a good actor, that’s all. Not nearly as good as you, but I’ve already seen all your movies.”
He placed a finger on his lips and then waved his masseuse away. When he was gone, Marcello stood and wrapped the towel around his waist. Then he walked quietly to Rachel and replaced the other masseuse’s hands on her shoulders. “I’m honored you’d sit through some of my early work. It wasn’t very good.” Her masseuse slipped quietly away too.
Rachel lifted her empty glass for more champagne. “But you looked good, so it made them bearable.”
“See? Fissare gli uomini.” He poured her a quarter serving.
“I don’t gawk at men.” Rachel took a deep drink from her fluted glass. “Swoon a little maybe, but definitely no gawking. How did you get over here all of a sudden?”
Ignoring her question, he said, “Your Italian is getting scary good. I’m going to have to be careful about talking in my sleep.” He nibbled on her ear and made her giggle.
“You’re better at this than the other guy. ’Cause you know where I liked to be touched. Take me to bed. Please?”
He plucked the glass from her hand and then lifted her against his chest, letting her towel drop to the floor. Her new curves were a temptation he’d fought all day. “As you wish, ma’am.”
“You sound like that butler you have downstairs, but he’s not as cute.” She grinned. “It’s been too long since you’ve made love to me, Marcello.” Her smile slowly faded as her head fell back and she closed her eyes again.
It’d been much too long. But what she needed was a little nap before dinner.
He needed a cold shower.
When they got to his bedroom, he said, “Hang on to my neck, Rachel.” She blinked her eyes open and complied, but just barely. After juggling her mostly limp body, he flung the covers back and gently placed her on his sheets. She looked just right there. “Sleep now, amore. I’ll wake you when they come to do your hair and makeup.” He laid a soft kiss on her sleepy, pouty lips.
“Fun.” With her eyes still closed, Rachel rolled over and tucked her hands under the pillow.
He covered her up and blew out a long breath. How would he keep his hands off her all weekend? More importantly, he needed to be sure to warn security to keep his father away if he showed up after his plane landed like he had the last time he’d been in LA. Rachel or his children would never be exposed to his vile father. Ever.
While she slept, maybe he’d get an update on the situation. He tapped out a text to his security team to be extra diligent, and then one to Skye asking for an update. After five minutes, when no response from his assistant came, he slipped out of his towel and joined Rachel under the sheets.
He ran his hand up and down the soft skin of her arm, making her moan softly in her sleep. He loved touching her. Just being with her.
After a few moments, his shoulders relaxed, and his heartbeat slowed. No one could calm him like Rachel. He let his eyes drift closed. Maybe just a ten-minute rest.
Startled awake by loud snoring, he smiled and found his phone on the nightstand. Note to self: plying Rachel with too much liquor led to no sleep for him.
He glanced at his texts and found the one he’d been waiting for. A report from Skye. After slipping quietly out of bed, he quickly crossed to his closet, dressed, and then went downstairs to his study. Hopefully, she’d found some dirt on his father he could fling back when he asked for money again. And put an end to his blackmail once and for all. And close that chapter of his life forever.