I didn’t see Finn again after we returned to the office. And maybe it makes me an arse, but I purposefully skipped a couple of meetings, so I wouldn’t have to. I didn’t have the stomach for a lecture on what a dick I was to Samantha. I already know that I was, but she’s just so…right. And it’s annoying as fuck.
What’s more is she’s not even saying it in a condescending or condemnatory way. It’s more like she understands the path we are traveling. And maybe she does. She’s the first person to talk to me about what is best for the girls. The guys just want to support me, but she’s right, I can handle the business side of things. With the girls, I’m drowning.
The door dings and I step off the lift and into my apartment, exhaling from exhaustion. I’m hit by a cacophony of music and laughter coming from the apartment. Rounding the corner to the living area, I see Samantha and Finn at the island laughing and cooking with the girls.
“There he is,” Finn says, flashing his megawatt smile. “Just in time to show them how to flip the pancakes.”
“Finn says you’re the best,” Poppy exclaims.
“He is, Pops. He taught me when I was your age.” Finn glances over the bar at me and winks. The wink is my brother’s apology, a sign that he’s with me in this. And damn if I don’t need that more than I even knew. “Go change, we’ll wait.”
On my way to the bedroom, I can’t help but notice that my steps feel lighter than they’ve been in weeks.
“I’m sorry if I pushed too hard today,” Samantha says from behind me as I drop my suitcoat on the bed.
“It’s fine,” I answer, loosening the tie from my neck.
“For the record, I think you’re remarkable.”
“What?” I turn toward her, confused by her words.
“I think you’re remarkable. You have a ways to go and that is to be expected, but you suit up every day. You haven’t left these girls. Not everyone would have done that. It also occurs to me that I haven’t said I was sorry that you lost your friend. I know you haven’t had time to process the grief, but I understand what it’s like to lose someone you love.”
“Thank you,” I nod. That’s nice to hear, especially, strangely, coming from her.
“But I’m still not changing my night,” she smiles a shit eating grin and leaves before she can gain the satisfaction of my laughter.
I emerge from the bedroom having taken a cue on my attire from the others. Finn is in shorts and a T-shirt, the girls are in pajamas, and Sam has on Finn’s sweats again. Only they are no longer rolled up, but cut off.
“She cut off your lucky sweats.” I look at Finn aghast.
“Ugh. Please tell me you don’t call these your lucky sweats for the reason I think you do.” Sam makes a fake gagging noise as she pours herself a glass of cranberry juice.
“Yes. My team always won when I wore them.” He winks at her. Poppy is youthfully oblivious and an actual giggle escapes Zinnie. Another first.
“And by team you aren’t referring to your double-O-and-seven, are you?”
“Sam.” Zinnie laughs and nudges her with an elbow. She’s getting to sit at the adult’s table for once and she’s clearly enjoying it.
“What?” Sam feigns ignorance. “I’ll have you know your Uncle Finn has quite the way with the boys.”
“Mary Poppins speaks the truth,” Finn says, handing the skillet to me before shifting away from the stove.
“You like boys?” Poppy suddenly looks up from her doll and zeros her big browns on Finn.
“I do.”
“Like my daddy liked my mommy?”
“That’s right.”
She shrugs. “I like boys and I like girls.”
“You can like anyone you want sweetheart,” Finn says, kissing her on her head.
“Remind me again. What are we making?” I ask.
“Panacakes!” Poppy shouts.
“Yes, but what kind? Chocolate chip? Blueberry? Mickey Mouse?”
“You can do Mickey Mouse panacakes?” Poppy asks in a disbelieving whisper, suddenly very serious.
I lean over the island and flash her with a smile. “I can.”
Sam laughs when Poppy looks to her to see if I am telling the truth. Poppy stands in her chair to peer over the island and while Finn holds her in place, we all decide blueberry Mickey Mouse pancakes are the menu tonight.
I make a large stack of what, for the most part, resemble Mickeys. There are one or two rogue pancakes that bear more of a resemblance to a blob than a Mickey, but I happily put those on my plate. Poppy pulls a chair around and helps me flip the last ones, eagerly watching as they fly in the air and land on the griddle.
“More serup please!”
“Syrup,” Sam corrects. “And just a little more.” She helps her pour an acceptable amount.
“These are better than Mommy’s,” Poppy says.
“That’s because Mom couldn’t cook. Remember when she would make lasagna, Pops?”
“Yuck.” Poppy scrunches up her nose. “It was horrid.”
“She uses the word horrid, but pancakes have an extra vowel?” Finn chuckles.
“Jenny couldn’t cook?” I ask Zinnie. It’s the first time I’ve said their mother’s name.
“No. She tried. Even took lessons,” she laughs.
“Why is that funny?”
“Because she got an F.”
“She was that bad, huh?”
“No, you don’t understand. This wasn’t a class that gave grades, but the teacher told Mom her cooking was so bad, she had to give her an F in hopes it would keep her from ever cooking again.”
“All these years, I never knew Jenny couldn’t cook.”
“Nope. So, if yours are edible, you’re ahead of the curve,” Zinnie says, picking up her phone to answer a text. Before she can, Samantha has removed it and placed it under her thigh, earning her an eye-roll.
I use the opportunity to tell the girls they have the option to stay home for the summer and not finish summer school. I scarcely have the words out of my mouth before they both choose to stay home and Poppy cheers in delight.
“Guess it’s settled.” I mumble through a mouthful of pancakes.
“Poppy, carry your dishes to the sink please,” Samantha tells her. “Since you and Walt cooked, Finn and Zinn will help me clean.”
Finn rolls his eyes at Zinnie who stands grabbing her plate.
“Let’s go old-man. I’ve got chats to snap.”
“Ugh. Less with the old man talk.” Finn grabs his chest like he’s in pain.
Sam turns to me and says, “I gave Poppy her bath when she got home from school. If you want to read her a book, I’ll come in and say goodnight in a minute.”
Read her a book? Is that something I should have been doing I wonder.
“Yes, Walt, read to me.” Poppy grabs my hand, and I’m staggered by the genuine happiness I see on her sweet face.
“Alright, but I get to pick the book,” I say.
She cuts her eyes at me, and nods her head. “Okaaay,” she says cautiously and with a hint of suspicion.
“Say goodnight to your sister and Finn.”
Poppy follows Samantha’s orders and hugs Finn, giving him a kiss before hugging her sister goodnight. And just like that, we’re off to her room to read.
I choose a book about a princess with pants from a box that we brought over from her old house. I’ve seen her with this one a lot, so I assume it’s a favorite. I’ve just cracked the spine when Sam walks in.
“Goodnight, ladybug. I love you.” Sam gives her a kiss and hug.
“Will you lay with me while Walt reads?” Poppy asks in a manner that I already know Sam can’t refuse. I know because I wouldn’t be able to. She looks to me and I shrug. “I can read to two as easily as I can read to one.”
“Okay, but just for a minute,” Sam whispers loudly and climbs over Poppy so she’s behind her. Poppy thoughtfully shares her pillow before she wiggles into Sam and pulls her arm around her and Edward.
Fifteen minutes later, I have two sleeping beauties on my hands as I read the end of the book to myself. I watch their synchronized breathing. I haven’t been very fair to Samantha. I seem to falsely judge her at every turn, but the woman can be infuriating. She never stops pushing when it comes to the girls. She’s so vested and it’s only been a couple of days. I don’t understand.
I place my hands on each side of them and bend over and give Poppy a kiss on her cheek, close to her ear. The tip of my nose rubs Sam’s jawline, and without thinking I leave a kiss on her temple. She smells divine, like syrup and soap. She has on no makeup. Her eyelashes are fanned across her cheeks and her lips are parted ever so slightly. I stand there longer than necessary, appreciating her features.
Pulling myself together, I head back to the kitchen where Finn is putting the last dish in the cabinet and Zinnie is wiping down the counter.
“So, what did she say after that?” Finn asks.
“She said she was just kidding, and tried to blow it off like she wasn’t being serious.”
“That’s the worst,” Finn says. “I hate it when people wrap an insult into a joke. Everyone knows they meant it.”
“I know, right?” Zinnie agrees.
“Who are you talking about?” I ask, grabbing two beers out of the fridge, handing Finn one.
“Becky.”
“Ugh.” I feign disgust and an eye-roll. “It’s always a Becky.” I say, pretending I know what they’re talking about. I’m rewarded with a laugh from my brother and from Zinnie.
“Still early. Anything you need to do?” I ask her.
“No. I think I’ll go to my room and talk to some of my friends.”
“Alright.” Just do it, for Christ’s sake. You’ve battled giants in the financial world. Just fucking do it. I walk to her, wrap her in a hug, and kiss the top of her head. “Good night. I’ll be in my office if you need me.”
“Okay,” she says after a bit of a delay. I’ve weirded her out.
“See. That wasn’t so hard,” Finn says, clinking his beer to mine once she’s left the room.
“Fuck off. Want to shoot some pool?” I ask.
The game room is on the opposite end of the apartment from the girls’ bedrooms, so we can play without disturbing anyone. “I’ve missed you,” he says, rolling a ball to the center of the table.
“Since when did you become soft? I’ve been here the whole time.”
“Your wrapper,” he points to my body, “has been here the whole time, but your insides haven’t been. I can’t remember the last time we played pool, or spent five minutes in a room together where the conversation wasn’t centered around work.”
“It hasn’t been that bad,” I scoff.
“It has really. I’m just saying tonight felt good. It felt…right. There was never a question in my mind as to why Everett chose you.”
“Well that makes one of us, because I wonder every day what that bloke was thinking.”
“You forget, I know what he was thinking. You’re the best big brother anyone could ask for. I knew you had what it takes to make this work, but I was never more certain of it than tonight.”
I have to give credit where credit is due. “That was all Samantha.”
He stops gathering balls and gives me a strange look.
“What?” I ask. He doesn’t say anything but just nods and rolls the last ball to the center.
“So, Camilla is back tomorrow?” he asks, but it sounds like more than a casual question.
“She is.” If he’s not going to speak his mind, I’m not going to offer anything either.
“How would you say she’s getting on with the girls?”
“What’s your point, Finn?”
“Do you think she understands that the girls are yours now?”
“No. I’m quite certain she thinks I ordered them out of a catalog and can send them back when I’m finished.”
“You mock, but I’m not sure you are too far from the truth.”
“Finn.”
“I’m just saying, now that you have some real help with the girls, maybe you can concentrate on Camilla. Make sure you are on the same page.”
“Cut her some slack will you? Neither of us wanted kids. We’re both figuring this out.”
A knock at the door draws our attention from the conversation at hand.
“I just checked on Zinnie. She’s online with some friends. Poppy’s asleep. Are you in for the evening?” Samantha asks me.
“I am. I plan on working from the study tonight.”
“Then I’m going to head home. I have some packing to do. My goal is to move in Thursday night.”
“I thought you couldn’t switch with me.”
“Not couldn’t, wouldn’t.”
I roll my eyes at Finn. She starts rattling off something about amendments.
“Fine. Fine. Fine. I get it.” I break the balls with more force then necessary.
“Before I go…” She walks over to the side of the table, placing herself directly between Finn and me who are standing on opposite ends. She puts both hands on the table and leans forward as though she were an Army general about to negotiate a difficult treaty.
“This ought to be splendid,” Finn snickers.
“Do I have a title?”
“Do you need a title?” I ask her.
“I’m just curious how you see my role here. If you have a title for me, it will give me, us, clearer boundaries, a way to manage expectations.”
“Nanny.”
“I don’t think that fits.” Of course, she doesn’t. “No.”
“Au pair?”
“No.”
“Well, you can’t be a governess. You don’t have a degree from uni.”
It’s a pompous, dick move, and I want to retrieve the words as they come out of my mouth. Fuck. Have I always been such a snob?
“I think we’ve established that already,” she says with a hint of hurt she’s clearly trying to hide.
“What about ‘Family Manager’?” Finn offers. Sam smiles like he hung the moon and I hide my fake gagging reflex with a cough.
“Does that work for you?” I ask her.
“It does.”
“Good. Now that that’s settled.” I bend to take my next shot.
“Now that that’s settled,” she says, straightening herself. “I believe we are all in agreement that the family consists of you, the girls, and Finn.”
“Okaaaay,” I say with the same caution Poppy exhibited earlier. I get the feeling I’m being baited into something.
“Here it comes,” Finn grins, his hands wrapped around his cue.
“As Family Manager, I will be instituting some changes to the routine in this household.”
“Really? Do tell.” I stand from my shooting position.
“Starting Monday, Maria will be scheduling your work days to start an hour later.”
“And why would she do that?”
“Because you need that time with the girls in the morning, and when school starts you will be alternating between taking Poppy and Zinnie to school.”
“Isn’t that what I hired you for?”
“No.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“Yes.”
“These one-word answers aren’t really doing it for me.”
“Fine. You hired me to manage the family not take your place.”
“I also didn’t hire you to manage me.”
“Yes. You did.”
“No. I didn’t.”
“You aren’t managing yourself, and at this point in time, it’s having a negative influence on the family. So, until you are in a position to manage yourself again, it falls under the purview of the Family Manager.”
“And there it is,” Finn smirks.
“Finn.” Samantha and I both grumble at the same time.
“Let’s get one thing straight—”
“Yes, let’s.” She leans against the table. “I take my job very seriously, as Finn can tell you, and you are in desperate need of managing. Maria has done her best, but she can only do so much since her priority is to manage your work agenda.”
“Fine, but I don’t need the extra hour. I already have the time built in to take the girls to school.”
“True, but after you take the girls you will need the hour to come back here and work out.”
“What?”
“You heard me. You’ve stopped working out since the accident. I know because I have access to your schedule. You have a high stress job, with no outlets. You are the girls only living guardian. I can’t have you dropping dead at the age of forty from a stress-related heart attack.”
I just stare at her like she’s an alien creature that has landed in my game room. But she’s not intimidated and has no qualms showing it.
“Also—”
“There’s more?”
“You need to sit down with the lawyers and determine guardianship of the girls in the event something happens to you.”
“Samantha…”
“It’s time to start making decisions like these girls are staying. I had Maria schedule a meeting with Pierce for next week. That gives you enough time to decide, but not too much time to overthink it.”
“Any other decisions you would like to make for me?” I seethe.
“I’d re-think the tie you wore today, but other than that, not at this moment.”
“Go home, Samantha. Before I fire you.”
“See you tomorrow, Finn,” she says sweetly over her shoulder and leaves.
I survey the room expecting to find debris from the tornado that is Samantha Abbott.