19
Nadia wished she didn’t miss Reid so much.
She wished she didn’t catch herself daydreaming about him when she was supposed to be working. She wished she didn’t rush home to watch his games. She wished she didn’t have trouble falling asleep unless she was wearing his jersey. And she wished she didn’t find herself anxiously counting down the hours and days until he returned home.
She was truly pathetic, and Nelson made fun of her every chance he got.
Over the endless course of those ten days, she and Reid kept in touch via texts and phone calls. Despite the time zone differences and his hectic schedule, he called her every night and after every game when he got back to his hotel room. If Viggo was there, they limited their conversation to the game—what went right or what went wrong—and made small talk about her day. They saved the dirty talk for sexting.
Nadia always looked forward to hearing from Reid. She thoroughly enjoyed curling up in bed, turning off the lamp and letting his deep, velvety voice seduce her senses. Just the sound of it could bring her to orgasm—and frequently had.
Talking to him every day also helped ease her nagging fears about him meeting other women while he was on the road. By making time for her between games, practices and traveling, he must consider her more important than hooking up with random puck bunnies.
She clung to that belief like a lifeline.
* * *
The Rebels’ last road game was against Montreal.
It was brutal. None of the Rebels played well that night. Their chemistry was off, and they made stupid mistakes and racked up costly penalties that resulted in them getting blown out 6-1, their first loss of the season.
After the game, Nadia waited for Reid to call so she could commiserate with him and try to make him feel better about the crushing loss.
But his call never came.
Around eleven-thirty her time, she sent him a text: Rough night, huh? I’m here if u need to vent.
When he didn’t respond, she tried not to take it personal. She told herself that he and his teammates had probably spent half the night at some bar trying to drown their sorrows in booze. She reasoned that he probably hadn’t been in the mood to hear a pep talk from her, no matter how well meaning. She came up with all sorts of rationalizations to explain why he didn’t call her.
But nothing eased her mind.
After a restless night, she got up the next morning and threw herself into housework to take her mind off Reid. She washed two loads of laundry, mopped the kitchen floor and cleaned the fridge while Nelson was out covering a college football game.
Reid was due home that day, but her excitement over seeing him was tempered by a growing premonition that something was wrong. He’d gone radio silent on her. No calls or texts.
Nothing.
As the day dragged on and her phone remained silent, her anxiety level ratcheted up until she couldn’t take it anymore. She turned on the hockey channel to make sure the Rebels hadn’t perished in a freak plane crash. Then she marched to her bedroom, powered on her laptop and pulled up the gossip blog that had outed her and Reid a few weeks ago.
Her heart stopped.
There, on the front page, was a photo of Reid cozied up with another woman in a bar.
The gorgeous brunette was sitting on his lap with her arms wrapped around his neck and her busty cleavage thrust into his face. He was grinning harder than a birthday boy in a whorehouse.
The headline above the photo declared: O Canada! Holden Samples Local Flavor After Blowout Loss To Canadiens.
A hot wave of nausea hit Nadia. It felt as if the contents of her stomach were surging up to her throat. She choked down the bile, the horrible taste burning her throat.
Don’t jump to conclusions. Maybe she was just an overfriendly fan.
She scanned the short caption accompanying the picture. Once she read the words “hockey hunk and mystery babe were seen leaving the bar together,” she recoiled from the screen, slamming her laptop closed.
How could she have been so fucking stupid? she thought, blinking rapidly as tears scalded her eyes. How could she have been gullible enough to believe that a manwhore like Reid Holden would ever change for her?
She had no one but herself to blame. She’d let down her guard, ignoring the voice of reason that warned her Reid was no different from other jocks. Even though she knew on some level that he couldn’t be trusted, she’d thrown caution to the wind and let herself fall for him. She’d even bared her soul to him, telling him her most painful secrets, sharing her heart’s deepest wounds.
And he’d played her for a damn fool, humiliating her for all the world to see.
She was still reeling with pain and fury when his call finally came an hour later. She sucked in a shaky breath, composing herself as well as she could before she answered in a cool monotone, “Hello.”
“Hey, baby.”
She hated the way her treacherous pulse skipped at the endearment.
“Sorry for not calling you sooner,” he went on. “My battery died and I couldn’t find my charger.”
Nadia rolled her eyes. The “dead phone” excuse was the oldest one in the book.
“I’m calling from the plane,” he told her. “Our flight out of Montreal was delayed because of bad weather. We should be landing in about half an hour.”
She smirked. “I’m sure the delay gave you more time to sample the local flavor.”
“Local flavor?” He sounded bewildered. “What’re you talking about?”
Fury fired through her veins. “Cut the crap, Reid. I saw the picture.”
“What picture?”
“The one with your face practically buried in some woman’s tits!”
Silence.
When he spoke, his voice was low and strained. “I know it probably looked bad—”
“No probably about it. It did look bad.” She sneered. “But I guess boys will be boys, right?”
“Nothing happened, Nadia.”
She snorted derisively. “Do you really expect me to believe that?”
“Yes, because it’s true.”
“Give me a fucking break, Reid.”
“Look, this isn’t a good time,” he gritted out. “We’ll talk when I get to your place.”
“No, we won’t. I don’t want you anywhere near me!”
He exhaled a harsh breath. “Hold on.”
She heard rustling in the background and pictured him marching down the aisle past his teammates to duck into the bathroom. She fumed while she waited for him to come back on the line. It seemed an eternity before he did.
“Listen, baby. I know the picture upset you, but nothing happened between me and that woman.”
“I don’t believe you,” Nadia hissed furiously. “Not only were you grinning from ear to ear while she was sitting on your lap, but you also left the bar with her. Am I supposed to believe you didn’t screw her last night?”
“I didn’t,” he insisted.
“Then why the hell did you leave with her?”
“The bar was in a seedy part of town. She’d called a cab, so she asked me to walk her outside and wait with her.”
“How chivalrous of you,” Nadia jeered mockingly.
“That’s all that happened. Did she ask me to go home with her? Yes. But I turned her down, Nadia. I put her in the cab and that was it.”
“Yeah, right.”
He let out a frustrated groan. “C’mon, Nadia. Don’t do this.”
“I didn’t do a fucking thing!” she cried. “You did!”
“I didn’t sleep with her, dammit!”
“I don’t believe you!” Her throat felt raw, burning with unshed tears. “You told me to trust you, remember? You promised you wouldn’t hurt me.”
He groaned raggedly. “Please, baby. Nothing happened. You have to believe me!”
“Why, Reid? Why should I believe a damn word that comes out of your mouth?”
“Because I’m telling the truth! And I don’t wanna lose you!”
She sneered. “Guess you should have thought of that before you let that bitch give you a fucking lap dance.”
He made a harsh sound in his throat. “Just let me come over and explain.”
“What else is there to explain? A picture’s worth a thousand words, and that picture told me all I need to know about you and what you obviously think of me.”
“One misleading picture can’t tell you shit about my feelings for you,” he growled.
“Misleading?” she shrieked. “So you didn’t have another woman sitting on your lap? So you weren’t grinning like the cat that ate the canary?”
He cursed under his breath. “I’m coming over so we can talk.”
“Don’t bother,” she snapped. “I won’t be here.”
“Where the fuck are you going?”
“None of your damn business.”
“The hell it isn’t.” He had the nerve to sound territorial.
“If you must know,” she taunted spitefully, “I’m going out with my friends. You’re not the only one who enjoys having a good time.”
“Goddammit, Nadia,” he snarled. “Don’t get any crazy ideas about picking up some asshole at a club.”
“Fuck you,” she spat. “I’ll do whatever—or whoever—the hell I want!”
He swore viciously. “Nadia—”
She hung up on him, shaking with outrage and adrenaline. Fighting back hot tears, she threw her phone down on the bed, grabbed the remote and punched on the television.
When Nelson came home an hour later, he found her lying in bed with her pillow clutched to her chest. She was watching a wildlife documentary, her eyes glazed and unfocused.
“Hey,” Nelson greeted her.
“Hey,” she mumbled.
She could feel him studying her from the doorway, his concern reaching her in waves of twin telepathy. “What’s wrong?”
Without a word, she pointed to her closed laptop on the desk. Nelson walked over and lifted the lid, leaning closer to peer at the page that appeared on the screen. When he saw the photo of Reid and the brunette, his jaw hardened with fury.
“That son of a bitch!”
A sad, bitter smile twisted Nadia’s mouth. “I guess now we know.”
“Know what?”
“He’s not a changed man.”
Nelson muttered a few choice expletives under his breath.
Just then Nadia’s phone rang. When she saw Reid’s number, she sat up quickly and slid off the bed. “I need to move my car.”
Nelson frowned. “Why?”
“I think he’s on his way over here.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes.” She stood and shoved her feet into her bedroom slippers. “I don’t want him to know I’m here. So I’m gonna park down the street.”
Before she could take another step, a heavy fist banged on the front door.
She shot a panic-stricken glance at Nelson.
He looked murderous. “I can’t believe that motherfucker showed up here. I’m gonna—”
“No!” Nadia grabbed his arm, stopping him in his tracks. “Don’t open the door.”
Nelson scowled. “Why not?”
“I told him I wouldn’t be home.”
“I’m sure he saw your car parked outside.”
“I don’t care. I don’t want to see him.”
“You don’t have to. I’ll get rid of him.”
She shook her head. She already knew how her body betrayed her whenever Reid was near. She didn’t trust herself to hold her ground if he barged his way into the loft and hauled her into his arms.
Nelson was frowning. “The sooner I send him packing—”
“No.” Nadia licked her dry lips. “If you open the door…things might get ugly.”
Nelson’s eyes narrowed. “Are you afraid of him?”
“No.” Just my pathetic weakness for him. “Don’t open the door, Nelson. All right? Please?”
He regarded her a moment longer. Then he clenched his jaw, spun on his heel and stalked out the door.
Nadia followed him to the living room, nervously wiping her damp palms on her leggings.
Another knock sounded. Louder. More insistent.
“Nadia?” Reid called through the front door. “I know you’re in there. Open up so we can talk.”
Nadia moved to the far side of the room and folded her arms around her waist in a protective, defensive gesture.
Nelson looked grim and tense.
Reid pounded on the door again. “C’mon, baby. Open the damn door. Give me a chance to explain what happened.”
I already know what happened, Nadia thought bitterly. You fucked another woman behind my back!
“Nadia, please.” His voice was ragged with desperation. “I’m not leaving until you open the door and hear me out. You owe me that much.”
Nelson frowned at Nadia. When he made a move toward the door, she vehemently shook her head, wordlessly begging him to remain silent.
His jaw tightened, lips flattening with displeasure.
“Please don’t do this, Nadia,” Reid entreated. “Don’t let a stupid misunderstanding come between us.”
It was all Nadia could do not to scream at him: You screwed some random bar slut! There’s no misunderstanding about that!
“I fucked up, all right? I shouldn’t have let her sit on my lap. I was feeling shitty about the game and missing you. She came over and started flirting with me, and I flirted back. I’m not proud of that. But nothing else happened, I swear to God.” Reid pushed out a deep, heavy breath. “Please, baby. Don’t break up with me. Open the door and talk to me. We can work this out.”
Nadia closed her eyes, her heart breaking into a million pieces. She wanted to believe him, wanted to trust him again. But she’d learned her lesson. Never again.
She startled when another thud rocked the door. His shoulder?
“Fuck this,” Nelson muttered darkly.
Before Nadia could stop him, he stalked over to the door, slid the safety chain into place and yanked the door open just enough to scowl at Reid. “You need to leave, man.”
“I wanna talk to your sister.” Reid’s voice held a dangerous edge.
Nelson glared. “She doesn’t have anything to say to you.”
“Where is she?”
“She’s not here.”
“Bullshit. I saw her car outside.”
“One of her friends picked her up.” A malicious note entered Nelson’s voice as he improvised, “She left half an hour ago, pissed off and dressed to kill. I’d be worried if I were you.”
“FUCK!” Reid swore, banging his fist against the door.
Nadia jumped at the sound, then clapped a trembling hand over her mouth. Her heart was racing, and her eyes and throat burned with unshed tears.
“I was rooting for you,” Nelson told Reid with just the right amount of reproach, disappointment and disgust. “I thought you were different. Clearly I was wrong.”
“I didn’t sleep with that broad,” Reid snarled impatiently. “Nothing happened.”
“I don’t know, man. The photo was pretty damning. But I’m not the one you need to convince—my sister is.”
“I know that. But how the hell am I supposed to convince her if she won’t even talk to me?”
Nelson shook his head. “Face it, man. You blew it.”
“No. Fuck that. I’m not giving up that easily.”
“Dude—”
“Which club did she go to?” Reid demanded.
Nelson snorted caustically. “Like I’d tell you.”
“Dammit—”
“You need to leave before I call the cops,” Nelson warned. “I’m serious, man. This ain’t cool.”
Reid fell ominously silent.
Nadia held her breath, her heart knocking against her ribs. She could feel Reid’s white-hot anger, frustration and testosterone seeping through the door. Her mind flashed on an image of him using his shoulder to smash the door in, flinging Nelson aside like a Raggedy Andy. He was a big, tough, physical guy who steamrolled other big guys for a living. It would have been so easy for him to send the door crashing into the wall the way he checked opponents into the boards.
Nadia squeezed her eyes shut, desperately willing him to leave without causing even more of a scene.
After several interminable moments, he finally relented. Sort of.
“Tell your sister this isn’t over,” he growled fiercely. “I’m not giving up on us. She means too damn much to me.”
“Yeah? Good luck with that.” Nelson shoved the door closed in Reid’s face and secured the dead bolt, then looked over at Nadia. She put her finger to her lips, signaling him not to speak until they knew for sure that Reid had really left.
Nelson checked the peephole. After several moments, he announced, “He’s gone.”
Nadia breathed a sigh of relief mingled with regret. “Thanks for getting rid of him.”
“For now,” Nelson said grimly. “You heard what he said. He’s not giving up.”
Nadia shivered at the thought. “He’s wasting his time.”
“Is he?” Nelson countered quietly.
She didn’t respond.
He searched her face, his eyes gentle with concern. “Are you gonna be all right?”
She swallowed hard and nodded.
“Have you eaten? I can run out and pick up some dinner.”
“Sure. That’d be fine.” She forced a small smile of gratitude.
“What would you like?”
“Doesn’t matter. I’m not very…” She trailed off.
Nelson took a step toward her. “Nadia?”
“Excuse me.” Abruptly she turned and hurried to her room, slamming the door behind her just as the dam burst, releasing the flood of tears she’d been holding at bay.
Wracked by the pain of Reid’s betrayal, she slid to the floor, pulled her knees up to her chest and wept with longing for what might have been.