Chapter One
Rilex felt too warm and comfortable to want to come out of the sleep that had unexpectedly taken him over only a few short hours before. He had thought that he was going to stay awake throughout the entire journey from Earth to Penthos and hadn’t felt any of the fatigue that the others seemed to show when they got onto the shuttle. As he stood with Severine staring out of the window of the lounge at the calm, peaceful space beyond, however, he had started to feel the tiredness settle into the muscles throughout his body and his eyes grow heavy until they had sat down into one of the large reclining seats positioned in the lounge and fallen asleep.
Just thinking of her name sent a thrill of excitement through Rilex and settled a warm, comforting feeling into his belly. He could still barely believe that the beautiful hybrid woman had chosen him to select her name for her. It was such a meaningful decision, and the fact that she had allowed him to make it for her felt intimate and precious in a way that he had never experienced. He couldn’t yet put voice to the hope that he held in his heart, the hope that someday, hopefully someday soon, they would be able to extend that intimacy and trust and move forward into a relationship that went beyond the simple and somewhat tenuous bond that had begun to grow between them.
He heard a soft murmur and wrapped his arms more tightly around Severine, who cuddled close to his body in the large, thickly cushioned chair. The sweet sound made him relax even deeper and he hesitated in opening his eyes for a few more seconds. He knew that as soon as he opened his eyes he was going to have to come back into reality. For now, as long as he kept his eyes closed and his arms cradling her, Rilex could pretend that this was reality and that it would continue on for as long as he wanted it to. Severine shifted in his arms and let out another cooing sound as she gradually came out of sleep. Wanting to see her sleeping against him, even if only for a few seconds, Rilex opened his eyes and looked down at her. They were curled around each other in the seat, her head rested forward on his chest as he held her, and his head leaned above hers.
He didn’t remember falling asleep this way. Instead, they had stood at the window talking until they both moved back toward the chair and sat in it. It was a gradual and natural movement, as if both of them were experiencing the same thought in the same moment. Their conversation had flowed just as naturally and by the time her voice quieted and her head rested back against the seat, he felt like he knew her on a new level, a level that confirmed both his deep and undeniable attraction to her, and his disgust and hatred for Ryan. Rilex had listened to Severine talk until the words stopped and watched her as each blink became longer, till finally her eyes stayed closed and her face softened in sleep. He remembered watching her for a few minutes, wanting to make sure that she was truly resting, but then his own eyes closed and he fell into a sleep that was deeper than any he could remember having in his recent memory.
Their bodies had moved toward each other during the night until they were lightly intertwined. It was as if they had been magnetized to each other by something that existed inside of them and recognized itself in the other when they were finally vulnerable in sleep. Now they were both coming out of that sleep and it was up to them to become aware of what was happening between them and decide how they were going to allow themselves to respond to it.
Rilex watched as Severine’s eyes briefly squeezed closed more tightly and then her long eyelashes lifted off of her cheeks and she let out a sigh as she stared across his chest at the window ahead of them. After a few moments, she raised her gaze to his. He offered her a soft smile, hoping that it would start to fill the space that existed between their minds even as their bodies remained closely linked. Severine stared back at him nearly expressionless. She blinked several times and then her eyes narrowed questioningly.
“What is it?” he said quietly.
He knew that no one else on the ship would be able to hear them even if he spoke to her normally, but something about the situation made him feel as though he should keep his voice low a quiet, almost as though he didn’t want the words to get far away from them. This was something that he had never felt before. He couldn’t explain what he was experiencing when he looked into Severine’s eyes or felt the warmth of her skin through her clothing. Rilex had left his own time and planet before he had found the mate who he could share his life with, and when he came to Earth, this type of relationship had been the furthest thing from his mind. By the time that he had come to terms with the reality that being on Earth and away from everything that he knew was the life that he would be living from now on, he was already too engrossed in his study of the HM-1313 wall and its meaning to even consider that finding a partner was something that he would ever have the opportunity to experience. It wasn’t something that he ever thought about. Had someone asked him about it, he would have told them that he didn’t have the space in his life for another person. In truth, after being torn from the life he had known and the people who had meant everything to him, he didn’t have the space in his heart for one.
Now, though, he didn’t feel that way. Suddenly it seemed that there was always space, but it was waiting for him to find Severine. She continued to look at him with her haunting eyes and then shook her head slightly.
“I wasn’t sure if all of this was real,” she said.
“What do you mean?” Rilex asked.
“I thought that it was a dream,” she said. “I haven’t been that comfortable and slept that well,” she sighed, “ever. I was afraid that when I opened my eyes, all of this wouldn’t be real.”
“All of it?” Rilex asked.
Severine nodded, the gesture causing a strand of her gold-streaked hair to slide over her shoulder and settle against the gauzy fabric of the dress that she still wore.
“The fact that I was free from Ryan.” She looked around them at the lounge where they had rested. “This ship. Everything out there.” She finally turned and looked at Rilex again, a new softness and tenderness in her eyes. “You.”
Her voice had dropped slightly and Rilex thought that he detected an underlying layer of emotion, but he didn’t want to create something in his mind that wasn’t truly there. Instead, he shook his head and carefully brushed the strand of hair back around her shoulder so that it fell with the rest of her mane.
“No,” he said. “It wasn’t a dream. You are really free, and you always will be. We are really here, on this ship, out in the vastness of the galaxy. I am really here with you.”
Her lips curved into a smile and Rilex felt a tug in his belly. He wanted desperately to kiss her. It was a compulsion, a need unlike any he had ever had. He had been attracted to other women before he came to Earth, but never had he experienced an absolute, overwhelming desire just for a kiss. He licked his bottom lip, hoping to ease the need, but it didn’t go away. He lifted his hand to cup around the base of her head, holding it steady, but he paused before he could bring his mouth to hers. She had been through so much already. She had had experiences like no one could imagine and a life that no one else but those who had gone through the same thing could ever even begin to understand. The concept of love, even just the simplest gesture of a kiss, was something that was beyond her understanding of the world and she might not yet be ready to venture there yet. He didn’t want to push her and risk causing her any more hurt that she had already had in her life. She wasn’t ready. She may never be ready. But he would have to be patient and simply hope that one day she would be and that he would know.
Rilex’s hand was sliding away from where it rested in her hair when footsteps alerted him to someone coming into the room. He turned to look over the back of the lounge chair and saw Jem.
“Rilex,” he said with relief in his voice. “There you are. We’ve been looking for you.”
“Is everything alright?” Rilex asked, afraid that something had gone wrong somewhere in the ship and that they were in danger.
“It’s fine,” Jem reassured him. “We’re almost at Penthos. Everyone needs to prepare for landing and get into their passenger pods. We should be arriving within the half hour.”
Rilex nodded.
“Thank you,” he said.
Jem returned the gesture and rushed away from the door. Rilex looked down at Severine, the strange feeling between them somewhat strained now. It felt like neither of them quite knew what they were supposed to do now that they were being forced out of each other’s arms and back into the reality around them. Severine sat up and twisted to stretch her back, then climbed off of the chair and stood. She put back on the shoes that had fallen from her feet while they slept and looked down at him with a hint of a smile.
“Thank you,” she said.
“For what?” Rilex asked.
Severine drew in a breath and let it out slowly, seeming to enjoy just that most basic and intangible demonstration of freedom and relief.
“For everything.”
She turned and walked out of the lounge. Rilex assumed that she was going back to the room where she had gotten prepared for the party. He wished that he could stay with her to make sure that she got to her passenger pod safely, but he had his own preparations to do before they landed and very little time to do them in. He stood from the chair and took a final look out of the window at the expanse of space rushing past them. Even though he couldn’t detect them in the vast blackness around them, he knew that they were soaring through a tremendous blanket of stars. He knew those stars. He had seen each and every one of them long before, and being among them at once reminded him of everything that he had lost, and everything that he had gained.