Rhode Island
Summer before Sophomore Year
I’ll never forget the first time things got weird between David and me. It was only for a minute, but it definitely happened.
It was our second summer together in Newport. We’d bought some taffy on Thames Street and taken it to the Cliff Walk. The sky was the perfect shade of summer blue, and the sun sparkled off the ocean as we walked, biting our candy and stretching it as far and thin as we possibly could before it broke.
“That was definitely a record!” David laughed, slurping a long, sagging ribbon into his mouth. “That had to be, like, twelve inches!”
I nearly spit my own glob of strawberry taffy on the ground, or I would’ve if it hadn’t been stuck to my teeth. “Leave it to you to make it sound dirty! Do you boys always exaggerate when it comes to size?”
David leaned against the railing, pulling another wrapped piece of candy from the pocket of his shorts. He placed one of the twisted ends between his teeth and pulled the other, exposing the soft purple cylinder as he leaned in close to my face and wagged his eyebrows. “I have no reason to exaggerate, Miss Kelsey.”
I stepped closer to him, a smirk stretching across my lips as I flicked his taffy to the ground with my thumb and middle finger. “You’re gross.”
“Aw, Kelse! That was a good piece!”
I rolled my eyes and dug around in my bag, producing a piece the same color. “Here, take it. Besides,” I said as David plucked up my offering, “if I really wanted to know, I could ask Amy Heffernan.”
While Eric and I barely spoke anymore, Amy and David had hooked up on and off for most of freshman year. Her name came out much harsher than I’d meant it to, like a bad piano note.
A huge grin spread across David’s face, and he let out a hearty laugh. “Whoa! Am I sensing a little jealousy here?”
“Like hell!” I meant it, though for some reason the sun felt especially hot on my cheeks at that moment.
David leaned back against the railing, still grinning, cocky and braces-free. Without them, he had a killer smile. As he twisted his palms over the railing, I couldn’t help but notice all that baseball training had been kind to him too. His shoulders were broader, his arm muscles more defined. No wonder girls like Amy had sat up and taken notice.
“Let’s just walk,” I said, hoping to drop the subject.
“What even makes you think anything happened between me and Amy?”
I rolled my eyes so hard, my whole head rolled with them. “Oh, I’m sure you’ve been the perfect gentleman.”
I tried to give him a playful shove, but he looped his arm around my neck and crushed me against his side. “You’re doubting my intentions?” he said with mock indignation. “I’m not feeling the love here, Kelse.”
His grip tightened, and I shrieked as my nose squashed against his shoulder, suffocating me with the scent of cologne and deodorant and taffy. Under different circumstances, I might have liked that combination. Or I might have liked it right then and there. But I didn’t have time to think about it, because David’s lips were suddenly right against my ear, his voice low as he said, “Know what sucks?”
The tingle that rippled down my body took me completely by surprise. We’d hugged plenty of times before. So what the hell, exactly, was that about?
I pushed him away, my hands flying up to fix the Miranda-like mess he’d probably made of my hair.
“What sucks?”
David paused dramatically. “That a gentleman never tells.”
My hands froze midsmooth and my eyes opened wide. “A gentleman? Where?” I looked frantically in every direction, and while David’s laughter told me I got the last word, I wasn’t happy. On the one hand, I didn’t want to know what happened when a good-looking guy and a girl nicknamed Hoover were left alone for indefinite periods of time. On the other, I didn’t want David feeling like there were things he couldn’t tell me. I’d always scoffed at the idea that guys and girls couldn’t have uncomplicated friendships. But that was before outside relationships had created any lines in the sand between David and me.
We’d reached the rocky part of the Cliff Walk when David rubbed his nose and squinted up the sky. “My nose is frying,” he said. “I can feel it.”
“Come on.” I nodded in the direction of an out-of-the-way boulder and started toward it. “I have sunblock you can put on. It’s too frickin’ hot for rock climbing anyway.”
David snorted. “You always find an excuse to turn around here.”
I ignored him, even though he was right. Every time I even thought about going farther than where we were now, my blood pulsed in my ears and my head felt swimmy. Hopping boulders just didn’t seem like a wise choice for someone who bruised as easily as I did, unless I wanted to look like a topographic map by the time the trail picked up again.
I sat on the sun-warmed rock, and David settled next to me, resting his arms on his bent knees. I had my trusty mini bottle of sunblock in my bag, and I put a piece of taffy between my teeth, letting it dangle like a coach’s whistle as I fumbled through the contents of my purse.
That’s when I felt hands slide around either side of my face. Then a split second of soft, delicious heat against my mouth. I gasped. I didn’t even realize the candy had been pulled from between my teeth until I blinked my eyes into focus and saw David, laughing victoriously as he rolled my candy around in his mouth.
I sat frozen, mouth gaping. My heart threatened to beat right out of my chest. I pictured it bouncing down the rocky incline until it landed with a splash in the ocean below.
Calm down!
But I couldn’t. Hadn’t he—didn’t that count as . . . ?
“Payback,” he garbled.
And his dumb ass sat there, chomping on taffy like he’d merely stolen a piece of candy and not put his nasty mouth that wasn’t even close to nasty all over mine.
Which meant I was the only one freaking out.
David laughed harder. “I really got you, didn’t I? How many times in your life have you been speechless?”
“Did you kiss me?”
“That wasn’t a kiss. If I kissed you, you’d know it.”
So I was the only one freaking out. I swallowed hard and shook myself, looking at the bottle of sunblock that had mysteriously appeared in my hand. Sunblock. Right.
“Very funny,” I said, popping the lid. “Hilarious. Here, put this—”
But David had already turned toward me and closed his eyes.
My jaw dropped again. “You want me to do it for you? Do I look like your mommy?”
“Nah.” He didn’t open his eyes, but the smile still played on his lips. I gave up, making an exasperated sound as I squirted the white lotion onto my fingertips. Then he added, “You’re prettier.”
I froze again. My heart flip-flopped as my hand hovered near his face. What the ef was up with him today? What the ef was up with me?
Refusing to be the only one rattled, I brought my fingers down on his nose, maybe a little harder than necessary.
“Ouch! Again, Kelse, not feeling the love today.”
“Sorry,” I mumbled.
“Was that for the taffy?” His eyes opened, alive with amusement as they gazed into mine. “Or for Amy?”
“You can do whatever you want with Amy.” I concentrated on the beauty mark beneath his lip, knowing he’d see my discomfort if I made eye contact. My new focal point wasn’t much help in the comfort department though, either. We were way too close to each other.
“I won’t see her if you don’t like her. Say the word and she’s out.”
“You would do that for me?”
“Of course. You’re my best friend. Ergo an excellent judge of character.”
I smiled and shook my head, touched that he’d place such importance on my opinion. Maybe there weren’t as many lines between us as I’d thought.
I hadn’t noticed that my hand had wandered as we talked. I’d started to work some of the excess sunblock around beneath his lips, letting my fingers graze his jawbone. The harshness I’d started with had been replaced by gentle, exploring strokes. My fingertips lingered over his skin, and I didn’t know why.
“I’d never tell you to stop seeing Amy if she’s who you want to see,” I said softly. “It’s not like you can control who you like.”
Our eyes met as I said it, and something in his seemed to darken. My thumb brushed the underside of his bottom lip, and I felt it in every cell of my body.
“I can’t, can I?” His voice was low, and his eyes searched mine. For a split second something electric passed between us—something I’d never felt before, never thought I’d want to feel. If I kept looking at him, I knew he’d kiss me. Except this time he’d mean to do it.
And I wasn’t even close to ready for that.
I sucked in a breath and looked away, snapping the cap of the sunblock in place. “No. No, I guess you can’t. But, um, thanks. For saying you’d put me first. It means a lot.”
I arranged my face into what I hoped looked like a composed smile, though the pace of my heart was more conducive to vomiting. David flashed one back. “Anytime. I meant it.”
With that, like a cloud that had passed over the sun, the weirdness was gone.