Chapter 3

Seven Months Later

“Yeah, man, stuff is going good here I gotta say,” Darren said. With the warm, June breeze whipping into the car, Darren rolled through downtown with his brother John. John, who was older than him by two years, had finally gotten around to coming to visit his brother and having a look at some of the investment properties. They’d been having a beer at a bar up on the north side when the manager of a construction company Darren contracted for remodeling called about meeting this afternoon. They hopped into Darren’s MKZ and headed toward the apartment complex. “Can’t lie, though, it’s a little strange getting used to being somewhere so small compared to Chicago, but I guess it’s okay…for the sake of making money. The conditions certainly are right here.”

“Yeah, I remember you telling me that,” John said. The line-backer-looking guy removed his sunglasses then ran his hands through his brown hair. “I don’t know if it’s for me, but Mom sure likes that you’re here.”

“Mom,” Darren said, shaking his head. “She’s still talking that marriage crap.”

“Now, now,” John said, his tone sarcastic. “I’m married, so don’t you forget.”

“Yeah, I know,” Darren said. “You know Mom keeps harping on it and stuff, but I don’t know. Just seems like it’s become too risky. I don’t even see the benefit to it. I mean, what’s it gonna bring to my life at this point? Looks like nothing but stress.”

John chuckled. “Yeah, it has its stressful moments, but you just have to find the right one.”

Darren’s eyes slanted over toward his brother. “Dude, you’re full of shit. Look what happened the first two times.” He referred to John’s first two marriages, one of which was while he was in college and only lasted for six months. The family wound up basically having the pay the woman to go away. Then John’s second marriage, which lasted for five years, ended with John having to split nearly half of his assets. And the woman didn’t even have children by him, and he wasn’t that young, so he didn’t necessarily lose as much as he would now that he was approaching 40.

John and Darren talked back and forth about marriage until they pulled into the parking lot of the Oak Terrace Apartments. The construction contractor was already waiting up by the door. John joined Darren while they and the contractor walked around the complex. John offered his input where necessary; Daren made sure to discuss the budget with the contractor. The both of them were glad they decided to dress somewhat down today as to not draw too much unwanted attention from the neighborhood people. This apartment complex wasn’t the sort of place either of them would hang out, but the profit expectations were so good Darren couldn’t resist buying it.

John looked back at the complex as they pulled off and headed back up the area’s main road. “Okay, looks like it might be a good investment.”

“Gee, thanks, John,” Darren said, sarcastically. “You know everything I do in life, I do for your approval.”

John playfully pushed Darren’s shoulder then Darren brought up the idea of them going to a winery to kill time. Twenty minutes later, they were sitting in the calm, sophisticated Luanne’s. Soft piano music played in the background. Their waitress happened to be a redhead with a bit of a southern accent. While Darren wasn’t necessarily the kind of guy who was wooed by accents, the woman was certainly attractive. John giggled as his younger brother flirted lightly with the waitress while she took their orders. He snickered when she zipped off to another table.

“What are you over there snickering about?” Darren asked.

“Dude, when are you gonna just settle down and get married?” John asked. He raised his hands, giving a surrender gesture. “I know, I know, I know. Marriage kinda scares you, and I don’t blame you. But what are you going to do, dude? Are you going to just keep playing the field until you’re like fifty or something?”

Darren blushed, shaking his head as he chuckled. “Well, I wouldn’t say that.”

“Come on, be honest with me,” John said. “You know I know you. You’ve been here in Fort Wayne how many months? Like seven or eight by now? How many chicks have you bedded since you got here? And look into my eyes while you tell me, Darren.”

Darren purposely looked away with a bashful facial expression then finally turned back to his brother. “Look, man, I’ve turned a new leaf. I’m a lot more focused here than I was back in Chicago. Really, I am. Plus, I got Mom and Dad calling me about doing this and that, and you know how that can be.”

“Hmm, hmm,” John said. “I want a number.”

“Dude, it’s not about the number,” Darren said, knowing that he’d already had a few one-night stands. “What matters is that I just don’t know how I feel about getting married and all that. I just don’t.” He held his hands up. “Just seems like there is a lot to lose. I know Mom talks all this stuff about having someone to leave my assets to and all that, but still gotta consider a lot of things. I feel the pressure, dude. I really do. You got married in your twenties, but you don’t know what it’s like to have people starting to look at you funny as you get older and still don’t have a wife or some kids. You know, when I was younger and used to hear about that kind of stuff or see it on TV or whatever, I really didn’t think much about it. Now that I’m older, though, I really see what they’re talking about.”

John’s head shook as he chuckled. “Man, you just have to meet the right one. I have faith in you.”

Darren scuffed. “Yeah...right. But I do want kids, honestly. Not gonna deny that.”

John’s eyes bulged. He set his wine glass down on the table. “You, Darren? You want children?”

“Yeah, of course,” Darren said, as if such were obvious. “You know I love kids. Hell yeah, I would like to have some kids. Two at least….maybe three if everything is right. I’m just not sure about the marriage part. I don’t want to lose everything or wind up in some horrible situation where the woman can basically try to control me through the courts. You know I don’t like being told what to do.”

“Oh, I know,” John said, quickly thinking back to his brother’s spats with their parents when they were kids. “And yeah, man...kids are great. You just gotta make sure that you have them with the right person or else everything can turn into a hellhole before you know it.”

“Exactly,” Darren said. “Seems to be a lot of shit shows going on nowadays...with the courts helping to pile on even more.”

John laughed again. “Well, man, maybe you just need to be one of those people who adopts a child without even being married or anything if it really means that much to you.”

“Awe, man, cut it out,” Darren said, shaking his head. “You know they’re probably not going to let some single, unmarried guy adopt a baby. People would probably be looking at me like I’m some creep or something. Having a kid now would be nice. I feel like I’m ready for it...and honestly, raising one in a place like this would probably be a lot easier and better than in Chicago.” He shrugged.

“Yeah,” John said. “But dude, I’m telling you, you could do something like that. And, you know, we have the resources. I’m sure Mom or Dad could easily help pull a few strings and get something like that moving along. You remember that story about that guy in Wisconsin who adopted twin girls, I think…. Dude, you could make it a story and really help your name...especially in a place like this. People would be calling you a hero, especially if you got some baby with some ole sob story that will make people tear up and stuff.”

As Darren prepared to respond, the waitress approached the table with a fresh bottle of wine then asked if they wanted to order food. John glanced at the menu then gave his order. Darren found himself staring off toward the front of the winery, out of the window and at Calhoun Street. A guy, who looked to be about forty years old and slightly balding, pulled a little boy down the street. The boy, who looked to be no more than three years-old, tugged his father’s hand hard enough to make the man stop and turn around. He pointed up toward something, stealing the father’s attention. Whatever it was the little boy pointed at, Darren couldn’t see; however, what Darren did see was not only a guy like himself taking care of a child, but also how the guy was investing in someone to leave whatever he built while living rather than it vanishing into thin air once he left this earth.

Could a man really adopt a child, even though he’s not married? It would probably be complicated, but like John says, I could give it a go. Do you really want a child right now, Darren? Forty will be here before I know it, though. And do I really want to be starting off as a parent at like forty years old? Or do I want to go ahead and get moving on this now so I can still use some of my younger years with him rather than being old? Dude, you don’t even know if some adoption agency in this state would go for that. A single man with no wife walking into the office and trying to adopt a child. That shit doesn’t even seem possible.

Darren was pulled out of his daze by the waitress asking him for his order. He simply ordered a small Greek salad, sending the waitress on her way. For the next hour and a half, the two brothers talked while they waited on their food, ate, then headed out and back into the afternoon sun. Darren stopped by his house so his brother could get his suitcases then they headed for the airport. Outside of the entrance, John hugged his brother as they said their goodbyes.

“Man, just keep your eyes open,” John said. “And you might change your mind on marriage.”

Before Darren could respond, John held up his finger signaling he wait for a moment. His phone rang. It was his wife, Melanie, calling to make sure he was getting his flight on time. Darren could hear the sound of yelling children through the phone. He went on that said goodbye to John, telling him to get on into the airport, then he walked back out to his car.

When Darren pulled up at his house, the sun was beginning its slow decent out of the sky. It now set just above the trees, illuminating the hundreds of steeples spanning across the city. He leaned his head back into the seat in thought. The children running up and down the street, enjoying the last couple of hours of daylight before the moon took the sun’s place in the sky, caught his attention on numerous occasions. Despite his success in business, that hole was still there. On top of that, his family harping on him about starting a family so wealth could be passed down rather than lost wore on his mind...even when he didn’t know it.

After a few minutes in thought, as well as reading through emails he missed while at the winery with his brother, Darren finally trudged up into the house. John’s idea of him adopting a baby on his own really stuck with him as he settled in for the night, changing into gray sweatpants and a t-shirt. Still, however, he just wasn’t sure about the idea of leaving a wife out of the equation. No matter how much he liked the idea of raising a child on his own without the influence, and possible control, of a woman, his traditional mindsets still kicked in stronger. It was easy to believe that if he wanted the bigger picture, he would need a loving, supporting wife at his side.

Shortly after Darren snacked on some Chex mix, he’d been passing by his living room window when he noticed a newspaper on his porch. How did I miss that? He stepped out onto the porch, waved at a neighbor getting out of her car and heading into the house, and grabbed the paper. Not much of a newspaper kind of guy, he decided to skim through it and see what the local journalists talked about. A few minutes into his surf, toward the middle of the paper, he came across a story that strangely tied in well with what the choices weighing on his mind: a man getting screwed by marriage.

Darren sat down on the bottom step, just next to a lamp on an end table by the door. He read through the story then shook his head as he finished the last paragraph. The story was the chilling account of a Ft. Wayne man who had gone through the adoption process with his wife in efforts to adopt a baby girl. Shortly after the process had gone through, and they settled into life with the child, the wife filed for divorce. According to the article, the wife left her husband to pursue a relationship with a younger man she’d secretly been seeing for a year. The part of the story that really struck a cord with Darren was how the courts awarded the wife a child support order against the now ex-husband. Under the eyes of the law, he is considered to be the child’s father. Darren closed the paper, shaking his head as he stood up and headed back toward into his kitchen.

***

Sherry pulled into The Blue Ivy parking lot shortly after the sun had gone done. Couples and families strolled downtown streets, some headed to parks while others to restaurants. Her car, on shaky ground at best, rumbled into the parking lot then she pulled it into a spot at the side of the building. With thirty pounds of extra weight on her at this point, Sherry struggled to climb out of her car. She pressed her hand into her back, stretched a bit, then headed toward the sidewalk. At nine months pregnant, she was ready for this baby to come. “Any day now,” she would often joke, especially when her days were long and drawn out. The stress showed on her face; irritability was the name of the game. Before turning the corner to walk along the front of the building, Sherry glanced around the parking lot to make sure she saw Carl’s car. Her nostrils flared from just thinking about him and the run-around he’d been giving her when it came it getting her last check.

Sherry forced a smile to Liz, a newer waitress who zipped around the way she could up until a few months ago. Liz spoke for a moment, in a rush, and asked Sherry how she was doing. “Girl, you look like you’re going to drop that baby any day now.”

Sherry scuffed, shaking her head. “Yeah, I wish it had been yesterday,” she said. “Where is Carl? I’m here to see him. Can you get him? When you get a chance, that is.”

Liz finished up tending to a table then went to the back. A couple of minutes later Carl walked out behind the bar. He obviously was not happy to see Sherry – a waitress whom had wound up having to let go of because not only of her new nasty attitude, but also slowness and struggle to show up to work because of her pregnancy. He knew exactly why she was there: to get a check he knew he specifically mailed to her twice. And both times, something supposedly happened to where she didn’t get it. Now, a couple of months later, the busy manager had to take time out of his day to deal with a 9-months-pregnant woman who he thought probably resented being fired while pregnant. Sherry approached the bar.

“Sherry, we talked about this,” Carl said. “I told you I mailed that check to you twice. I’m not going to keep going through this if there’s something wrong with however you get mail.”

Sherry placed her hand on her stomach and leaned forward on the bar. “Carl, I told you I was sorry. I really am, but I never got that check. I just never got it. I know you’re probably busy and all that. I know, I know. But still, you know I need that money. I ain’t been working in nearly two months now, so I gotta have it. Can’t you just write me a check like you did when what’s-his-name quit and be done with it already?”

“Sherry, you know I’ve already had enough crap from the owner because of you,” Carl explained. “And that checkbook isn’t for paying employees...especially employees who haven’t even worked here in two months. I’m sorry to hear what you’re going through, but you’ll have to call the company office and go through them.”

“But, Carl, when I called them they told me to come in and talk to you,” Sherry said. “And now you’re not answering my calls when I call you, so I had to come up here. Look at me, Carl. Look at me. I’m nine months pregnant, broke and tired. Do you really think I wanted to come up here like this and do all this just for fun?”

Carl looked Sherry up and down for a moment, remembering the pretty, social butterfly she used to be. Once upon a time, he truly had a thing for her. His hitting on her never worked – went unnoticed. He obviously wasn’t her type. Now, as he looked at her, he couldn’t help but to wonder who the father was and why she obviously wasn’t getting much help from him. Without realizing, he shook his head.

Sherry’s eyes bugged when she picked up on Carl’s disapproving. Now, it was starting to makes sense. Sherry always knew the manager had a thing for her, but there were always a lot of vibes he gave off that turned her off of him. Truthfully, Sherry picked up on his spoiled brat demeanor by the way he talked to some of the other waitresses who ignored his advances.

“Carl, please,” Sherry said, raising her voice a bit. “The check wasn’t even for that much. You know you could easily write it and all this could be over.”

Carl huffed a bit then looked at Sherry as if she were the biggest nuisance in the world. He slammed his clipboard down on the bar then headed into the back. A couple minutes passed then the door came swinging open. He darted out, up to the counter, then slammed the check down. “Here you go, Sherry. Okay? Here’s your freakin’ check.”

Before Sherry could slide down the bar and reach for the check, Carl turned away like a madman and went on about his business. His movement caused enough of a wind to pick up that the check blew off of the bar then onto the floor, a couple of feet from Sherry. A disappointed groan slipped out of her lips as she thought about how hard it was going to be for her to bend over and pick up the check. Almost calculating her movement, she took a deep breath then bent over and scooped the check up off of the floor. Just as she stood upright once again, pressing her hand into her lower back, she heard Carl gripe, probably thinking he was doing so under his breath, “Only kept her on for that long because she was pretty.”

Sherry’s face reddened, but she resisted the urge to give Carl a piece of her mind. She had too many other things to worry about, so she went on and walked back out into the winter night. She pulled her coat closed and trekked down the street, mindful of her every step as the last thing she needed right now was a fall. Shortly after climbing back into her car, she paused for a moment. With her eyes glued to The Blue Ivy’s side brick wall, she thought about all of the events that had unfolded in her life recently. For lack of a better phrase, Sherry felt like her car was heading toward the edge of a cliff. She could see it – the cliff coming up then the subsequent fall to her death – but her pressing the brake did nothing to stop it.

Pregnant. I’m 23 years-old, pregnant, and haven’t told my family yet. Chrissy says I shouldn’t think that deep into it, but I already know what they’re going to say. Sister...brother...cousins...all had things going for themselves, got married, then had kids. And here I am...the youngest, the poorest, and the one who’s knocked up...out of job and staying at my best friend’s place until...until I don’t know when. Father? Not in the picture and I’m not all that interested in finding him.

Then the worrying news delivered by her doctor just a couple of weeks ago crept back into her mind: some cells on Sherry’s breasts looked like they could be cancerous. Because certain scans and tests were too dangerous to do on a woman is nine-months pregnant, the first order of business after she gave birth was to look at the situation and see if treatment was necessary. With the kind of luck Sherry had been having, there wasn’t any doubt in her mind the cells would be cancerous. Stage 4, possibly. However, if there was one silver lining in such a messed up situation, it was the fact that her pregnancy helped to pick up on these cells before they advanced too much.

“Fuck,” Sherry groaned. Snow started falling once again. Once upon a time, even into her adulthood, she was that person that loved the snow – loved the way the city looked when covered in a white dusting. Now, snow was representative of something else. Being early in the winter, it was only bound to get colder...much like Sherry’s life.

After dwelling on her situation, Sherry sighed then started her car so she could head back to Chrissy’s place. She had no interest in being caught out in a snowstorm in the middle of the night. She turned out onto the street then headed south, zigzagging through the south side of downtown until she got onto Broadway Street. Shortly after crossing under the railroad, her car started jutting violently. Then, a strange scraping sound followed and her speed suddenly decreased. As the street sloped back up from the dip under the viaduct, her car jerked forward a few times more, at moments so powerful it sent Sherry’s own body thrusting forward. Her nerves were on edge; her heart pumped as she tried to make sense of it all. Next thing Sherry knew, her car stopped. She restarted it a couple of times, each time putting it into DRIVE then trying to move forward. The car didn’t move.

“Fuck, now the transmission goes out,” Sherry said. “Fuck!”

Cars zoomed by, not a single one stopping to help. Uselessly, Sherry started the engine a few times more only to find the car stalled and unable to move. She rammed her fists into the horn as the sky only got darker. After a few minutes of helplessly thinking about how her life had turned to total shit since finding out she was pregnant, her eyes swelled. She gripped the sides of the wheel, using every bit of strength she had left to keep from slamming her forehead into the steering wheel. Once she finally got herself together, now on the verge of tears but knowing she had to do something other than sit out on a snowy street, she dug her phone out of her pocket and called Chrissy. Guilt consumed her because she’d been depending on Chrissy so much, but she didn’t know what else to do.

“Chrissy, I’m so sorry,” Sherry pleaded when her best friend answered. “But my transmission went out on Broadway. Can you please come and get me?” She tried to hold back from sobbing, but this all was turning out to be just too much. She wiped her eyes then continued. “I’m sorry, Chrissy, but can you please come get me?”

Like the good friend she was, Chrissy consoled Sherry then promised that she was on the way. While she waited, making sure to turn on her hazard lights, she drowned in sorrow and reflected on this circumstance she never thought she would find herself enthralled in. She looked around at her car, knowing there was no way in hell she would ever be able to pay to get the transmission fixed. Even if it somehow only were to cost a few thousand dollars, her bank account was slowly approaching negative; her credit cards had officially been maxed out a month ago.

Sherry couldn’t help but to look down at her stomach as she waited on Chrissy to pull up. The very thought of having a newborn then having to possibly go through radiation or chemo treatments seemed so bleak – so damn gloomy. The world seemed to be crumbling beneath her feet while a rope handing down to save her was quickly being lifted up just as she reached for it. Never in her worst nightmares did she think her life would wind up in such shambles.

“How in the world am I going to take care of a baby?” she cried to herself. “I’m due any day now.” She leaned her head forward onto the steering wheel and sobbed while she waited.