Chapter Twenty-Eight
TREAT AND SAVANNAH sat beside each other on their father’s couch. They’d brought Hal home at nine o’clock, and he was asleep by ten. Now it was nearing midnight, and Treat felt like he’d been treading water for the past twelve hours. He’d heard back from his buddy Brett and had learned the truth about Max’s ex well before he’d received the call from Max confirming the same. He’d have given anything to have been in both places at once. To his surprise, Max wasn’t upset when he told her he’d hired Elite Security to watch over her in his absence. Maybe I should be upset, but it shows me just how much you care about me. She’d been incredibly brave to tackle her worst fears, and now he wanted her back safely in his arms. He’d offered to charter a flight to bring her home tonight, but she’d said she was too exhausted to even think about traveling. She’d be back in Colorado tomorrow, and she said she’d call him when she got to her apartment. It was going to be a very long night.
Rex joined them in the living room. “Where’s Josh?”
“In the shower. Want a beer?” Treat asked.
“Nah, thanks. I think we need to have a family meeting.” Rex sat in the chair next to their father’s recliner.
Josh joined them a few minutes later. “Savannah, do you want a drink before I sit down?”
“Yeah, I’ll take some wine. Red, please.”
“I’ll get it,” Treat offered. He went to the kitchen. Anything to stop the pain of staring at his father’s empty chair. They’d had a near miss, and it had brought his father’s mortality into clear focus. He wasn’t about to waste any more years away from his family.
In the kitchen, Josh asked about Hugh and Dane.
“Hugh’s on his way,” Treat explained. “Got hung up on a layover. And Dane gets in tomorrow. How are you holding up?” Josh was the most sensitive of his brothers, and Treat wanted him to know that he was there if he needed to talk.
“Okay. I’m not going to lie; it scared me. I’ve never thought of Dad as someone who could get sick.”
“Me either.” Treat took a swig of his beer. “It scared me, too, but I think Ben knows what he’s talking about, and if he thought this was anything other than stress cardiomyopathy he’d tell us.”
“Do you believe in it? Broken heart syndrome?”
Absolutely. If anything had happened to Max, I’d have been in the hospital next. “I don’t know, but we all know Dad believes he still sees and talks to Mom, and I think he just might.”
“Yeah,” Josh said. “Me too.”
“Really?” Treat asked.
Josh shrugged. “Stranger things have happened.”
“Wine, please,” Savannah called to them from the living room.
They joined the others, and for a while they sat in silence, nursing their drinks. The door opened, and Hugh started to say something, but they all turned toward him with a shush on their lips.
“Dad’s asleep,” Savannah said as she went to hug their youngest brother. “But he’s okay.”
Treat waited for Hugh to shed his leather jacket, and then he embraced him. “You okay? Your trip all right?” Hugh could easily pass for twenty-five instead of twenty-nine, with his tousled black hair that was badly in need of a trim and wearing worn Levi’s.
“It was long, but I’m here, and that’s all that matters.” Hugh greeted his other two brothers and headed to the kitchen for a drink.
“Do you want me to make you something to eat?” Savannah asked when he returned with a beer.
“Nah. I grabbed a sandwich on the way.” Hugh sat beside Savannah on the couch and kicked an ankle up onto the opposite knee. “So, Dad’s okay? What is this BHS?”
Treat explained what the doctor had told them.
“Sounds like it should be called BS to me,” Hugh joked, his brown eyes flitting from sibling to sibling.
“Hugh.” Treat used the same voice he’d relied upon when his brothers were out-of-control teenagers. It hadn’t always worked, but it did right then.
“I just mean that I don’t see why they call it that. Call it stress cardiomyopathy. Why does everything have to be about feelings?”
Treat leaned forward, and Savannah put a gentle hand on his leg, silently reminding him that they were all on edge. “Leave it alone, Hugh,” Treat said. “Who cares what they call it? The point is, he needs to take it easy for a few weeks.”
“Which is precisely what I wanted to talk about,” Rex said. “I’ve been thinking. Maybe we should hire another ranch hand or two, or a manager who can do more. I’m swamped and—”
“No need,” Treat interrupted. “I’m going to stick around for a while.”
“You have your own businesses to run,” Josh said.
“Yeah, Treat. You’ve worked too hard to give them up for this,” Savannah added.
“I’m not giving them up. I’ve thought this through. Rex, you were right. I should have come home sooner. I’ll hire someone to do my overseas work and negotiating, so I’ll have to travel only a few times a year.” Just saying it aloud made him feel much better. His dad’s illness had been a wake-up call. Even though Max didn’t want him to change his business practices, that’s exactly what he needed, and wanted, to do. She wasn’t the only one haunted by her past. Treat had fled town to escape his own demons, and it was high time he faced them.
“Treat, man, you don’t have to do that. I can deal with it,” Rex assured him. His biceps twitched, much like their father’s did when he was upset. “I’ll just hire a hand or two for a few weeks. We’ll be fine.”
“I know you can. This isn’t about you versus me,” Treat said.
“Is this about your girl? Max?” Josh’s question didn’t hold an ounce of resentment, as it might have if it had come from Rex.
The truth was, this was as much about Max as it was about him. She deserved a man free from the weight of his past.
“I’d be lying if I said this has nothing to do with her. I love her.” He paused long enough for that information to sink in. “But I realized I can’t be with her, or anyone else, until I get this off my chest. To answer your question, this is really about all of you as much as it’s about me or Max. Rex, you’ve been calling me on this for years, and I’ve deflected every jab, not because they were untrue, as I claimed, but because they were too true, and too shameful, to admit. After Mom died, I failed you guys.” This was harder than Treat had imagined it would be.
“What are you talking about? You never failed us,” Josh said.
“Come on, Josh. I did. I know I did. When it came time for college, I was relieved to move away. As hard as that is to admit it, I need you to know the truth. The ranch was one big reminder of Mom and everything I couldn’t do.” He gripped his beer bottle tighter.
“Treat,” Savannah said, reaching out to him.
“Let him finish,” Rex said, and all their siblings’ gazes shifted to him. “He’s trying to tell us something. Let him get it off his chest.”
“Thanks, Rex.” Treat didn’t know if Rex was waiting with bated breath for him to admit his failure, or if he was being a supportive brother, but it didn’t matter which one was more accurate. He was thankful either way to have his support. “Anyway, I worked my butt off to prove that I was worth something, and I realized today that I’ll never be the man Dad is.” He pointed to his father’s bedroom. “That man in there is the best kind of man, and I’m just a regular guy who never quite measured up to him.” He’d said it aloud, and now he waited for the I knew its and the It’s about times.
Savannah’s arms were around his neck seconds later. “Treat, you have never let me down. You’re everything to me, and you’re every bit the man Dad is.”
“Dude, you let me sleep in your bed after Mom died. Don’t you remember? Dad would never have done that,” Hugh said with a shake of his head. “You’re anything but a failure. You saved me.”
“And me,” Josh admitted. “You were there every time I needed anything. You waited up for me at night and never let anyone bother me. You let me climb into your bed when I was scared, too, and you listened to me cry for weeks on end. You even gave me money for field trips.”
“I had forgotten about that,” Treat said with a smile. He realized that Dane wasn’t there. It would have been easier to talk to them all at once, but since he’d already opened the floodgates, he might as well let the rest pour out. He’d have to talk with Dane alone after he arrived.
Treat waited to see if Rex would say anything at all, but Rex just cracked his knuckles, leaned his elbows on his knees, and looked at Treat with a stoic expression. The familiar Braden biceps dance was in full speed.
“I’m not telling you this to fish for compliments. I’m telling you because it’s haunted me forever, and I don’t want it to anymore. I’m ready to put down roots, and before I do that, I need to know that I’ve been honest with each of you. Rex, I’m sorry. You were right all along. I bailed on the ranch.”
Rex got up and walked out the back door.
Treat clenched his jaw as he rose to follow him out. At some point, with Treat around more often than not, that chip on Rex’s shoulder was going to come crashing down. Treat hoped it wouldn’t cause an even bigger issue between them.
“Let him go,” their father said.
Treat spun around and found his father leaning against the stairs. “Dad, you should be in bed.”
“I’ll go back to bed when I’m good and ready,” Hal said.
“How much of that did you hear?” Treat asked.
“Oh, I reckon I heard all of it. All of it that mattered, anyway.”
Savannah and Treat went to his side as he moved toward the living room, and he shrugged them off. He settled into his recliner, looking long and hard at his eldest son.
It was one thing to come clean to his siblings, but a whole other thing to face the man who had poured his heart and soul into raising him. He deserved everything his father was about to unload on him. He lowered himself into the chair beside his father’s recliner, never breaking eye contact, and said, “I’m sorry, Dad. You tried so hard to raise me right, and I wanted to make you proud, but…”
His father’s mannerisms reflected Rex’s, and for a minute Treat feared he might walk out just like his brother had. Instead his father reached for his hand and squeezed it. His father’s face morphed to that of strength and conviction.
“Son, you are, and have always been, everything I ever hoped you’d be. You were barely eleven when your mama died, and barely nine when she first became ill.”
The pressure in Treat’s chest nearly knocked the wind out of him. “Dad…”
“No, son. You were everything this family needed, and there has never been a time that you haven’t been. You see the faces of your sister and brothers? Do you see the love in their eyes? They are who they are in large part because of you. You taught them about strength and family. You taught them about love, and even when you let your little scraggly brothers in bed with you—and don’t think I didn’t know about that.” He looked at Josh and Hugh. “You, Treat, and you alone, were giving them what I could not. The truth is, when your mama passed, she took part of me with her. I did what I could. I stepped up in every way I was able, but I’m just a man, like you and Rex, Dane, Hugh, and Josh. We’re all just who we are, and who we are is Bradens. Bradens always do their best. Sometimes our best feels like not enough, but that doesn’t mean it truly isn’t. Not one of my children has ever let me down.” He looked at Hugh. “Not Hugh when he didn’t show up for the ranch’s first auction.” His gaze shifted to Savannah. “Not our beautiful girl, Savannah, when she snuck out of the house when she was fifteen, or you, Treat, when you had to haul her back home. And you never said a word to me about it.”
Savannah’s eyes widened. “You knew about that?”
Their father nodded with a smile, then looked at Josh, who was listening intently. “And not your brother Josh, when he decided to design dresses for a living.”
Treat watched his brother soak in their father’s pride, and he knew that Josh had been waiting to hear that for a long time.
“The point is, Treat, you might have needed to cleanse your soul so that you could go on without that gorilla on your back, but you’ve got to know that it was your gorilla. It was a monkey devised by a little boy’s frightened mind that grew to a full-size gorilla and tried to weigh you down. It has weighed you down for a long while, but you didn’t let it take over completely because it wasn’t real. I’m proud of you, son. That gorilla was just a figment of that little boy’s imagination, and you finally saw your way clear to climb out from under it.”
Treat went to his father and held him longer and tighter than he ever had. He didn’t know if his father was right or not, but he appreciated every word he’d said, and he knew that he would never let him down.
“Are you really thinking of putting down roots?” his father asked when they separated.
“Not thinking about it. I’m acting on it,” Treat said, and glanced at the back door.
“Now, that boy out there? He’s got an even bigger burden on his back than you did. Give him some time,” his father suggested.
“I’m not sure what I did to him, specifically,” Treat said.
“He’ll let you know when he’s good and ready. Just like you did.” Hal pushed to his feet and said, “Walk me back to my room, Treat.”
When they reached his father’s bedroom, his father sat on the edge of the bed and patted the space beside him. Hal Braden wasn’t a man who talked just to hear his own voice. He chose his words carefully and rarely doled out unsolicited advice to his children. So when he asked Treat to listen carefully, Treat did just that.
“I’ve been waiting for you to figure out what was holding your heart back all these years. For a while I wasn’t sure if it was something I did wrong when you were growing up. I did my best, but being both mother and father had its trying times. Then I thought that maybe you just hadn’t met the right woman yet. But when I looked into your eyes earlier today, I saw the fear in them. And I saw the love, too; don’t get me wrong. I knew that the other thing I’d worried about for so long was true. Son, your mama didn’t die because of our love for each other. Surely you know that.”
He nodded, unable to form a response, as his father had seen his greatest fear. As ridiculous as it was, it had lingered far too long.
“This life we’re given is short,” his father said. “It’ll be gone before you know it, and, son, you’re a good man. You’re a loving, kind, generous man with so much more to give than flashy resorts. You always have been. Just because you allow yourself to love doesn’t mean that some higher power will steal that person away from you—or steal you away from her. If you don’t allow yourself to love, to fully saturate yourself with someone else’s life, someone else’s feelings, if you don’t allow your ego to disappear and your heart to beat for another person, so that every breath you take is taken for that person, well then, I’m afraid you’ll be missing out on one of life’s only blessings. And besides your family and giving life to children, it’s the only blessing that really matters.”
His father reached into his bedside drawer and handed him a small velvet bag. Treat felt the circle within his fingers and knew what it contained.
He looked at his father with a tinge of disbelief.
“Your mama wanted you to have this, and somehow, today, she knew it was the right time.”
“Dad…” His voice was choked out by emotions.
“It’s yours, son, to do with as you wish. I’m just doing what I’m told.”