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Accidental Husband: A Secret Baby Romance by Nikki Chase (59)

Daisy

I need a new laptop. I bought a cheap one back in nursing school, spending all the money I had left in the bank. A few years later, that same laptop is now slower than a snail crawling over salt.

Finally, the home page of my bank’s website appears. I type my password and log into my online banking account.

I used to dread this, seeing all my accounts listed. Without fail, the balance on my credit cards would be too high, and the balance in my checking account would be too low.

I no longer lack any money. In fact, I’d consider myself wealthy. I mean, $125,000 is not quit-my-job-and-retire-forever money, but it's more money than I—or my mom—ever had.

After paying off all the balances on my credit cards and lines of credit, I’d still have enough for Jack’s college expenses. Without having to worry about money, he’d be able to fully focus on his studies, which is what I wanted for myself and never had.

With Chad Murray apprehended by the cops, his loan is pretty much voided, so now I’d even have $40,000 extra than I expected. Or $45,000, if we're going with his “interest” calculation.

When I finally see my balances, my jaw drops.

I don't have $125,000 sitting in my checking account.

I have $250,000.

Caine. He’s the only person who could possibly be behind this.

I smile wryly, exhaling air from my nostrils. I don't know anybody else with that kind of money to burn.

I haven't seen him since that night at the hospital.

Anger kindles within me.

He thinks he can fix this with money, the same way he probably solves all of his other problems. If he thinks he can buy my forgiveness, he's wrong.

* * *

Caine seems surprised to see me when I march into his office, even though Sasha has already announced my arrival. It seems like he doesn't quite believe I’m here.

Being in this space reminds me of the first time I stepped foot inside this building, my heart hammering as I negotiated the terms of the sale of my virginity, trying to get the highest price I could.

Now, I’m here for the opposite reason.

I walk right up to his big glass desk and stand across from where he's sitting. Just like the one other time I saw him here, he looks like a million dollars. Power emanates from him. He has the kind of quiet confidence that has no doubt been cultivated by him getting what he wants ninety-nine percent of the time.

Well, this is the other one percent.

“Give me your bank account details. I’ll send you back the money you sent me.”

“Why would you do that?” His eyebrows furrow. He seems thrown off balance. I guess this is not how most of his business negotiations go.

“I didn't earn it. I only stuck around for half the length of time we agreed on, so I'm giving you back the other half of the money.”

“You don't have to do that. All that money is yours.”

“If you're not giving me your bank account details, I’m withdrawing that money in cash and bringing it here myself.”

“Are you crazy? Do you know how dangerous that is?” He gets up to his feet, making his big swivel chair roll backward a few inches.

“Is that how you deal with everything? If something doesn't make sense in your head, you just give it an insulting label to fit it into one of the few narrow boxes in your mind? Oh, I don't want your money, so I’m crazy. I say something bad about your people, so I’m lying. I must be just another one of those whores who are after your bags upon bags of money.”

Caine winces, like my words have physically hurt him. Good. I want to stab him with everything I've got and twist the knife so it hurts extra bad.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly, his gaze downcast like he couldn't bear to look me in the eyes. “Would it make you feel better if I told you I’m hurting more than you could ever know?”

I didn't expect that reaction. On my way here, I played and replayed various scenarios in my head, and Caine doesn't react that way in any of my mental simulations. I wouldn't have imagined Caine, usually so proud and superior, to lower himself and show actual remorse.

“Save all that apology for your fiancée. She probably needs it more than I do.”

“I ended the engagement,” he says in the same gentle voice.

Now I'm the one taken aback.

“Why?” I blurt out before I can stop myself.

I shouldn't care. Why should I care who he's with? We just have a business relationship. This is a business meeting. There's no room for anything personal here.

“I fell for you, Daisy.” Caine raises his gaze to meet my incredulous stare.

What I see in his deep blue eyes kicks me in the gut, knocking the wind out of me so I can't speak. He means that. I see honesty, sincerity, vulnerability—all the things he's never shown me before.

“I know you don't believe me, but I did,” Caine says. “I don't know when it happened, but I fell for you and suddenly everything seemed so simple. All the complicated notions and ideas in my head disappeared. I can hear my own voice without all the noise.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It means I finally understand what really matters. Only people matter. Not money, not history, not business. Only the people I love. Like you.”

If my words were like a knife, his words are like a flame, softening and melting the hard, protective armor I’ve built around my heart.

“What do you think you're going to accomplish by saying all these things to me?” I hold on to my armor. I have to. Caine is way too dangerous for me go in naked. I know that now. I’m not as naïve as I used to be.

Sure, he's a beautiful, graceful, gorgeous man. But underneath that sleek, sexy exterior, there's a dark danger lurking, like the sharp claws and fangs of a big cat.

“Nothing. I don't have any agenda anymore. I’m done playing games with you, because I care about you. I'm just being honest.”

I stare at him. His words sound so good, so enticing, but I can't open myself up only to let him inflict more pain. I'm not masochistic—not in that way, at least.

Caine takes a deep breath and locks his pleading gaze on me. “If I tell you everything, will you stay and listen?”

“You know that's not going to change my mind about giving you back the money.”

“The money is yours. You can do whatever you want with it.” When he sees me opening my mouth, he quickly adds, “Including give it back to me, if that's what you want.”

I'm stunned into silence.

“Please, take a seat.” Caine gestures at the chair behind me. “All I want is to spend a few more minutes with you.”

I lower myself down onto the chair without taking my eyes off Caine. He does the same, taking a seat and leaning forward over his desk. He interlaces his fingers and rests them on the glass surface. He hangs his head down, then looks up at me from underneath his lush lashes.

“Thank you,” he says with a sad smile. “I don’t know how I’m going to explain everything that has been going on in my head these past few days. I’ve been realizing how wrong I’ve been in some ways, and how right I’ve been in other ways. Like I said, you cleared my head right up.

“I realized I was right about family being the only important thing, like my father has always taught me. But I was wrong about who counts as family.

“My father and my brother are my family. My mother never was—not because she didn’t give birth to me, but because she never cared about me. I thought Uncle Nathan and Todd were family, but I was wrong about that, too.

“I used to think everyone else, who wasn’t part of the family, only wanted money from me. To an extent, I was right. Anybody I pay to do things for me, obviously, only wants money from me. I used to be bitter about that, but I realize now it’s only because I haven’t forged many relationships that don’t involve any financial exchange, and that’s my own fault.

“My relationship with my ex-fiancée was money-based, as well. She grew up in a family much like mine, which made me think that at least she wasn’t going to use me for my money, because she has plenty of it herself.

“To be honest, ironically, I was going to use her for her money and connections.” Caine chuckles mirthlessly. “It would’ve been a good business move to marry her. I probably burned a few really expensive bridges when I broke off the engagement, but I had to do it. I didn’t want to end up like my father, who got married because it was good for business.

“It was never a real relationship. We just had meals together occasionally, but we never had anything to talk about. It was never… There was never any real connection there.” He looks almost shy as he says, “It’s not the way it is with you.”

“Did you ever…” I pause and hesitate. I’m not sure I should ask this question, but I don’t know if I’m ever going to see him again after today, and I want to know the answer. “Did you ever have any healthy relationship with a woman?”

Caine laughs, as if I’ve said the funniest thing ever. “No,” he says. “You raise a good point. Maybe that’s what has fucked me up my whole life. At the end of the day, I’m probably just your average, run-of-the-mill guy with mommy issues.”

I give him a smile—not because he said anything particularly funny, but because it seems like the kind of thing that could help him feel better.

“To tell you the truth, I did have a real relationship once.” Caine’s features turn serious. Pain flashes in his eyes, but it goes away as quickly as it appeared. “She… I thought she was the one. I thought I was going to marry her. We were living together.” He winces. “I gave her everything, then I found her in bed with another man.”

My chest tightens. I don’t know if I can forgive him for the things that he’s said to me, but I know now where he’s coming from. I understand why he did the things that he did.

If I were Caine, I’d probably lose faith in people, too, and women in particular. No wonder it was all just a power struggle with him. That’s all he’s ever known all his life.

And just when he thought he’d found something genuine, it turned out to be another lie.

I don’t know what comes over me, but an idea enters my mind and embeds itself into my brain. There’s no rhyme or reason to it, but I know exactly what I should do next.

“Let me stay with you for the remaining fifteen days,” I hear myself say.

“What?” Caine seems to be taken off-guard.

“Yeah. I’m still not expected to be back at work for a couple more weeks. You don’t want the money back. I don’t want it if I haven’t earned it. So, let me earn it by picking up where we left off and seeing it through until the end.”

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