When he’s spent, Eli leans down to wrap his arms around me as he catches his breath.

He’s like a different person right after sex. Sweet and affectionate.

Too bad this will have to end. I’ll miss this. I’ll miss him.

Eli kisses my shoulder softly. “I love you.”

There it is again. My lips can’t help but curl up into a smile, even as the darkness in my chest grows.

Time is ticking.

“It’s okay if you can’t say it back, you know,” Eli says as he strokes my hair. “I understand. I completely understand.”

Somehow, I doubt that he does.

“Maybe you have trouble trusting me, and I don’t blame you,” he says. “I’ll do everything in my power to make it up to you, though.”

Yeah. He has no idea what he’ll have to give up to be with me.

I can’t. I can’t handle this sappy, melancholic mood.

I straighten my back and turn around to face Eli, his cock falling out of me and the silly apron forming a flimsy barrier between us. Already, it feels like I’m putting a little distance between us even though our arms are still wrapped around each other.

“What are we going to do now?” I ask. “Got any plans?”

If we only have a little time to spend together, we might as well fill that time with plenty of happy memories to look back to.

“Yeah. I have a plan for myself.” Eli grins.

“For yourself, huh? What about me?”

“I don’t know how you’re going to pass the time, but I’ll be fixing your car,” he says.

I frown. “You can fix my car?”

“Well, I haven’t taken a look at it, but unless we need new parts . . . Yeah, I should be able to.” Eli grins. “I did learn a thing or two while you were gone, you know.”

“You jerk,” I say playfully, lightly slapping him on his broad shoulder. “Why didn’t you say that from the start?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Eli gazes intently into my eyes. “I wanted to spend some time with you. Maybe it was wrong, but I liked the fact that you were basically trapped with me. I felt like you were going to run away otherwise.”

I laugh. “I probably was.”

“Uh-huh. I remember what happened in the cupcake shop.”

I groan.

“Don’t worry. I liked how you looked with frosting on your hair,” he teases.

“Yeah? Maybe I should start wearing my hair just like that on purpose.”

“You’ll be so popular at parties,” Eli says.

I narrow my eyes at him. “What kind of parties do you go to these days? Orgies where people lick frosting off one another?”

Eli widens his eyes with amusement. He taps his index finger on my forehead. “Get your mind out of the gutter, young woman. I was talking about kids’ birthday parties.” Speaking slowly like he’s addressing an idiot, he says, “Kids . . . Frosting . . . Get it?”

“Okay, okay.” I laugh. “So, you’re saying you’ve never been to an orgy?”

“Do you really see an orgy happening in Ashbourne?” Eli cocks an eyebrow.

“Hmm . . . I guess not.”

Eli stares at me quietly, making me feel self-conscious. He says, “I still can’t believe you’re here with me. I feel like you’ll disintegrate the moment I let go of you.”

I laugh nervously. “I won’t. I promise you . . . I’m real.”

“That’s exactly what a fake person would say.” Eli grins as he continues to stare at me. Finally, he lets out a big sigh and lets go of my waist. “Okay, I’ll have to get started soon if I want to finish before dark. Are you going to be okay on your own in here?”

I give him a flat stare. “Eli. I’m a big girl. I’ve lived in the big city, all on my own. Give me some credit.”

He shrugs and gives me a desolate look as he crouches down by a cabinet to grab some tools. “I don’t know. I thought maybe you’d miss me or something. Guess I was wrong.”

“Okay, okay. I’ll miss you. I’ll join you, but I’ll have to put on some clothes first.” I laugh.

“You’d better. I don’t want anybody else seeing you like that. I don’t need the competition,” he says, pointing a metal wrench at me.

“I’d also freeze to death if I went out there in an apron.” I hold the hem of the piece of cloth between my thumb and index finger. It’s thin.

“Right. Yeah. That, too.” Eli grins when he notices me pouting. “I’m just kidding. You can stay here where it’s warm. I’ll let you know when the car’s fixed.”

“I’ll join you. I just need to check some emails first,” I say.

“Hmm . . . My busy corporate ladder climber.” Eli walks over and kisses me on the forehead. “Alright, see you later, princess.”

“Okay.”

I watch Eli’s broad back as he makes his way toward the door. With one hand, he carries a rusty metal toolbox. His stiff boots tap heavily against the floor with every step.

When Eli pulls the door open, some snow that has accumulated topples in. He turns to look at me, grinning. “There’s plenty of snow, still. We can make a snowman.”

“We might be too old for that.” I smile back at him. I remember how we spent another snowy day doing just that, a long time ago.

But that was then, and this is now.

Eli shrugs. “Just a suggestion.”

When he closes the door, I drag air into my constricted lungs and let it out. I had been keeping that big sigh inside me for hours.

Every gentle touch and every sweet word built up the pressure inside me, but I couldn’t let that show in front of Eli. Not if I want us to enjoy what little time we have.

I grab my phone, feeling like it’s been forever since I last checked it.

Contrary to what Eli thinks, I no longer try to climb the corporate ladder. I’m not even on it anymore.

It feels strange. I haven’t felt this disoriented in a long time. At the same time, it’s also liberating to not have to worry about schedules and meetings.

I’ll get back on that horse soon. I just need a little time to find my bearings and figure out some things, that’s all.

I tap the little envelope-shaped icon on my phone.

A bunch of new emails. But, they’re mostly promotional newsletters from the make-up store and some fashion brands. Not urgent emails from my boss about my next task, or our next date.

I delete the new emails.

And, there, near the top of the pile, is that email. The one that has changed everything. The one that has ruined all my carefully laid plans. The one that makes it impossible for me to go back to Eli.

I don’t know why I keep this email. Maybe a part of me hopes to one day get a second opinion from a doctor who will tell me something different.

It’s unlikely, I know. That’s just wishful thinking.

I press a button and the phone screen goes dark.

What’s the point of reading and re-reading that email?

I should put on some warm clothes, make two mugs of hot chocolate, and join Eli outside. Maybe watching his muscles bulging with the effort of twisting a wrench will make me feel better.

It could also make me feel worse, I guess. But I’ll just have to keep my mind off our inevitable separation and everything will be fine and dandy.

I probably won’t see him again after this, anyway.