CHAPTER EIGHT
Alice, one year later
Leaning over the paper, Alice scrawls her name inside the front cover and adds a small heart. Turning her eyes up to the woman in front of her, she smiles. "Are you a writer, yourself?"
"Only a little," the woman admits. She grins. "I want to be. Your work is so lovely, and you inspire me so much. The way you write romance just draws me in."
The smile on Alice's face grows wider. "Really? Thank you so much." She glances behind the woman at the rest of the line behind her. A twinge of stress aches in her chest. "Thank you for coming. I appreciate your support of my work."
The next few people who come up for the book signing are remarkably similar people to the last woman. OK, that's probably unfair: Alice knows her readership is diverse, and she believes that. She's just been at this for so many hours that everything and everyone seem to blur together. Exhaustion overwhelming her. She yawns into her hand. One of the employees working at the bookstore where she's signing walks up and gently places a hand on her shoulder.
"Can I get you anything, Ms. Lenore?"
She nods quickly. "Coffee would be lovely, if you could. Thank you so much for asking."
Back to signing. Beside her, there are a number of huge stacks of her newest novel. Ever since she started writing shifter romance, her readership has dramatically increased. She was popular before, but now it feels overwhelming. Alice is flattered, but she's not sure how to handle all of these changes.
The biggest relief is that her anxiety has dramatically decreased during the course of the last year. Before, even being in a big bookstore like this would have been impossible. The idea of being at the center of a book signing would have been completely horrifying. The fact that she can be here, mostly calm, is a huge change from before—and a positive one.
When the employee brings the coffee, she smiles and thanks her profusely. Once the caffeine in her system, everything seems a little easier.
Later, a woman comes up in the line holding her own book. Alice immediately recognizes it. It's an old one, one of the works from a few years ago. It's a Victorian. Even looking at the cover, Alice finds herself overcome by a sense of nostalgia.
Setting the book down, the woman nervously smiles. Clenching her fingers around the strap of her back, she shifts from foot to foot. The expression on the young woman's face immediately reminds Alice of herself. "Would you be able to sign this one for me today?"
"Of course!" Alice smiles. She picks up the book tenderly. The spine is worn, like it's been well loved. She opens it and gently flips through the pages. The way it makes her feel is completely indescribable. "I loved writing this one. Have you been following my work this long?"
"It w-was only a couple years ago," the woman points out, "But yes. I love your new works, but the old writing is so important to me still."
Alice's heart swells. She bites her lip and grabs the pen. Still, she hesitates before signing. "I'm glad you like my work." Her voice goes a little quiet. "I was in a bad time of my life when I wrote this, you know. The man I was with was really terrible."
The woman listens intently, nodding. Alice continues, though she feels odd for talking about personal things to a fan. "Fiction can really change so much. It transforms. It helped me find a better place to be mentally during that time."
"Are things better now?" The woman looks more emotional than Alice would expect. Somewhere deep inside of her, Alice wonders if this woman has experienced something similar.
"Yes." Alice smiles. "And they'll be better for you, too. Promise."
Opening the book, she moves to the front cover and writes her signature heart with her felt-tipped pen. Underneath her name, she writes a little extra message.
Keep with it. Things will get better. Always remember that the most important thing is not to be loved by others, but to love yourself.
The rest of the people who show up are fairly standard. Alice loves her fans, but it's a huge relief when everything is done. When everyone's gone and the signs for the book signing are taken down, she gets a call on her phone and goes out back.
Luka is leaning against his car. When she walks outside, he jogs across the courtyard and gives her a brief kiss. "How was it? I'm sorry I was busy. Work ran late. They wanted me to adjust the floorplans for the hotel I designed before they turn them in to the contractors tomorrow morning."
"Don't worry about it." Alice smiles. "I'm fine on my own these days."
Luka looks emotional. He bites his lip. "I'm proud of you."
"I'm proud of myself." Leaning into him, she presses her face into his chest. His scent is one of vanilla and lavender. "You smell so good. Are you using a new body wash?"
"Close. New detergent." He flicks his tongue against his teeth. "Sorry, I'm not a cologne guy."
"Cologne stinks anyway." She sticks her tongue out. A bookstore employee opens the back door and calls out to them.
"Hey, sorry to bother you. Would either of you mind helping us move the new books to the back? One of our employees had to leave for a family emergency, and it'll take forever if it's just me."
Alice nods, smiling widely. "Sure!"
The two of them follow her inside and help move all the huge leftover stacks of new books to the back. Alice takes a few to put on her main shelf section. Walking out into the main store, she searching alphabetically until she finds herself. Leafley, Lenart, Lenore.
They have a bunch of her books here. She was told she's pretty popular in this location, but the pure number of her works on the shelf shows how much. Alice didn't really consider how prolific of a writer she is until she looks at this.
It's funny. She's sure that, rereading, she'd find much of this writing embarrassed and uninformed. After all, her main perception of a relationship was her one with Craig, and that was hardly a good example to go by. He was just using her for his own twisted perception of a relationship, as well as for her money. If she really thinks about it, Alice was using him, too—she thought she knew what love was supposed to be like, so she gravitated toward it. Ultimately, though, it was just a wrong guess.
Last she heard, he was somewhere in Montreal wooing an actress there. He's sent her a number of bitter emails since he left, probably in the hopes that he'd take her back. No way.
Eventually, the two of them drive back home. It's a long drive. Luka suggested at some point that they move to a major city, but Alice rejected that. She knows it makes things more inconvenient for both of them, but she's grown attached to the small town. It's not her place of forced isolation anymore. Now, it feels like a safety zone that she can return to.
Her anxiety has gotten leagues better, but she's not perfect yet. Sometimes social interaction still gets a little too much for her, and it's a relief to have a quiet town and home that she can retreat to when panic starts to rise in her gut again. If she lived in a city, that would be impossible. Maybe someday she'll move, but not today.
Somewhere on the drive back, she dozes off. She only wakes up hours later, with Luka gently nudging her awake. Eyes opening, she stares out of the car windshield at the lights of her house.
"C'mon, love. Let's go sleep inside," Luka reminds her in a gentle voice.
Alice stumbles out of the car, but once she's up and at 'em, she realizes she's not tired at all. Pausing, she purses his lips and calls out to Luka before he can unlock the front door. "Hold on."
"Hm?" He turns around and hopes down the steps, raising an eyebrow. "What's going on?"
Alice glances past her house at the glimmer of the sea she can see through the trees. "Let's go walk instead. I'm not tired anymore."
Luka looks confused, but he shrugs and grins.
She leads him down through the forest. The two of them hop the fence for the national park and continue down to the beach. Once they get there, Alice kicks off her sandals and digs her toes into the stand. Coming up behind her, Luka wraps his arms around her body and leans in, kissing her neck and making her giggle.
A deep feeling of contentment consumes her, making her emotional. Smiling softly, she leans back into his body. Once again, she finds herself caught up in how good he smells.
She glances down the beach, away from the houses on the other side. The beach is empty. Far out, the tide is low and she can see a sandbar past a small gap of water. "I wanna get to the far end of the beach," she comments.
"That's a ways out," Luka says, sounding amused.
Alice turns around, looking at him. "Not for a bear."
He raises an eyebrow, a grin spreading across his face. "You'd have to hold on tight."
To prove a point, Alice clenches her fists a few times. "I've got good grip strength."
"OK," Luka gives in, just like she knew he would. "But don't blame me if you get scared."
That feels like a challenge. When Luka shifts, it's just as incredible as usual. The way the change happens is so fluid, so unreal. They've been together a year, and she's still in awe every time.
He gets low to the ground. Smiling wide, Alice grabs a hair tie from her pocket and pulls all of her hair back. Climbing onto his back, she weaves her fingers into the thick fur and leans toward his ear.
"I don't do scared. Not anymore."
End of Book 2