CHAPTER 26
The next five days are the worst in my life. I spend most of my time pounding my fists against the different punching bags at Damien’s gym. The repetitive sound of my knuckles on leather reverberates through the huge space.
Whap! Whap! Whap! Whap! Whap! Whap! Whap! Whap!
“Forrester!”
I ignore Bobby as he strides around the cage and heads my way.
“Forrester!” he yells, just a few feet behind me.
My refusal to acknowledge him must piss Bobby off because he slides behind the heavy bag and shoves it, hard. The bag slams into my body and knocks me back.
“What the fuck!” I scream at him, my fists up and ready to strike.
“Hey! Calm the fuck down!” Bobby yells, holding his hands up defensively. “What the hell is wrong with you man?”
“Nothing,” I mutter and start hitting the bag again, this time with my shins. Roundhouse after roundhouse, I kick the heavy bag.
Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Thunk!
I keep going until sweat is stinging my eyes and my muscles are fatigued. I unstrap the gloves and drop them on the ground.
“Are you ready to talk?” Bobby asks.
I turn to walk away and Bobby grabs my arm and spins me around forcefully. The testosterone from the workout, the endorphins pulsing through my body, the anger, the frustration, the heartbreak. I don’t know which one makes me do it but I swing at Bobby and catch him fully on the jaw. His head snaps back brutally and I see the surprise in his eyes turn to fury.
Fatigue has dulled my reflexes because I don’t see Bobby’s fist coming at me until it connects with my face. My neck wrenches sideways and a blinding pain shoots through my left eye.
“Fuck!” I clutch my chin and spit a mouthful of blood, staring angrily at my friend.
He storms over to get in my face, his massive chest inches from mine. “What the fuck is wrong with you!” he bellows.
“Nothing, okay? So leave me the fuck alone!” I shout back, turning again to leave.
“Drew!”
Fuck! Can’t they just leave me alone?
Damien is jogging over to where Bobby and I are standing, looking confused as hell.
“Leave me the fuck alone,” I hiss at them both.
Damien moves in front of me, forcing me to look at him. The rage that has been churning inside me since Sydney disappeared finally explodes out in an alarming display. I lunge for Damien with a left cross. He feints and grabs my wrist, throwing me down and pinning me to the ground in a brutal hammerlock.
“Let me up,” I growl.
“Are you going to calm the fuck down?”
I breathe in deep and exhale into the mat. “Yes.”
“Fine.” Damien gets up and releases me from his hold.
I lay on the ground for a minute before slowly returning to my feet.
“Come on,” Damien says, motioning me toward his office. “You’re going to tell us what the hell is going on.”
I grab my bag and remove my water bottle, drinking half of it quickly. Defeated, I sling the straps over my shoulder and follow Damien and Bobby into the small room at the back of the gym.
“Sit,” he says forcefully, pointing at the nearest chair.
I take his order without hesitation, something I rarely do. Bobby sits next to me and Damien takes a seat behind his battered metal desk.
“Now talk,” Damien demands.
I rub my jaw and look at the ground, unable to face my friends.
I hear Damien open the fridge behind him and an ice pack lands in my lap. “Take this, so your pretty little face doesn’t get all fucked up.”
I can’t help but smile at his facetious comment.
“Fuck you,” I say back, my attitude more sarcastic than angry at this point.
“Dude, just spill,” Bobby says. “We know it has to do with your chick. You were already all fucked up by her months ago. And,” he says leaning toward me, “I saw the shit on the internet the other night.”
My head snaps up at this information. “What shit?” My eyes flash from Bobby to Damien and I can see that they know something that I don’t.
Damien types on his laptop and swings it around to face me.
Andrew Forrester Goes Toe-to-Toe with Adam Reynolds Over Mystery Girl
March 9th
Written by Kate M.
Superhot superstar Andrew Forrester almost came to blows with sexy Brit rocker Adam Reynolds last night at the NYC launch party for Verve, the swank new nightclub at the top of the Warren Hotel. A partygoer tells us that Reynolds and an unknown smokin’ hot redhead were getting cozy when Reynolds’ ex Kiera Radcliff confronted the other woman. The redhead immediately left the hotel after exchanging words with Radcliff.
Forrester arrived thirty minutes later, looking incredibly angry, and headed straight for Reynolds and Radcliff who were still arguing over the departure of Reynolds’ mystery date. Forrester reportedly got in Reynolds’ face and was yelling at him over the beautiful redhead. A female friend intervened and convinced Forrester to leave the nightclub before any punches were thrown.
Who’s the redhead that has these two gorgeous hunks fighting over her? What did Radcliff say to upset the unknown woman and cause Forrester to come to her defense? Will it affect the chemistry between Forrester and Radcliff in the movie they are supposed to start filming soon? We hope to find this lucky girl soon and get some answers!
“Holy fuck,” I whisper as I scroll down the page. As my shock wears off I get pissed. Red-tinged, beat the shit out of someone, irrational, crazy pissed. Adam Reynolds ‘cozying’ up with my motherfucking girl? Jesus, I want to fucking swing at something again. I don’t fucking share. Ever. My body is vibrating from adrenaline.
“Calm the fuck down, dude.” Bobby’s deep voice pulls me from my enraged thoughts. “You’re going to break the computer in half. Loosen your damn hands.”
I look down and see that I’m gripping the laptop so hard that my cracked knuckles have split back open and are bleeding again. Fuck! I breathe as deep as I can and swallow down the acidic rage that wells up from my gut.
Wonderful, there’s a photo. It’s of me about ready to rip Reynolds’ head off, Leah squeezed in between us trying to push me away. And there’s that bitch Kiera standing in the background with a smug smile on her face.
“Yeah man, everyone knows,” Bobby says. “So tell us what the hell is happening to you.”
I rub my hand down my face and throw the ice pack on the desk. I tell them everything that happened at Verve. How Sydney is afraid of celebrities but I don’t know why, about my delayed flight and how it took forever to get to New York, how Kiera Radcliff told her who I was before I could get there, and about Sydney leaving the club and not being heard from since.
Bobby and Damien are speechless. Nothing I’m not used to by now.
“Damn man, that’s rough,” Bobby finally says.
“Yeah buddy, I’m sorry.” Damien looks worried for me.
“Well, the heart to heart has been great and all, but I have to go.” Embarrassed, I stand up, open my bag, yank out a T-shirt, and pull it on.
“Don’t give up man,” Bobby says. “She’ll come back.” He stands up and pats my back as I leave.
Once I get home I turn the water up as hot as it will go and stand in the shower forever, letting it scald my aching muscles. I revel in the burning sting on my skin. It’s a more tolerable pain than the one I’ve been in for the last five days.
I’ve called Leah twice a day since Sunday when we left Sydney’s loft early in the morning. She hasn’t heard a thing, and hasn’t been able to reach her. We’ve both sent dozens of texts and left voicemails until her mailbox filled up. Nothing. I’ve ignored every call I’ve gotten that hasn’t been from Leah.
I get out of the shower and throw on some clothes. Not sure what to do next, I grab my phone and tuck it in my pocket and as soon as I do it rings.
It’s probably my sister Allie bugging me about the article. She knows about Sydney and probably assumed that the woman referenced in the gossip blogs was her. She knows I hate talking about that shit.
I answer it without even looking, probably not a smart move since I’m avoiding everyone. “Allie, I’m fine. You can stop…”
“Drew?”
My breath hitches and I bend over. I feel as though I’ve been kicked in the chest. “Sydney?” my voice cracks.
She sniffs as though she’s been crying.
“Where are you?” I ask as calmly as I can manage.
“At my place, can you come over?”
She has no idea that I’m already shoving my feet into a pair of shoes and heading for the door.
This time, the concierge allows me upstairs without harassing me. It’s a different guy, but still, I haven’t gotten over that bastard trying to keep me from my girl.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
I slam my fist over and over on her door until she answers. The first thing I notice is how tired and swollen her face appears but I don’t care what she looks like. I’m so fucking relieved to see her, that I rush in and grab her, holding her tightly to me. I kick the door shut with my foot so I won’t have to let go.
“Jesus, Sydney. You scared the crap out of me. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.” I bury my face in her hair and inhale her scent, letting it wash over me. Shit, I missed her.
She wraps her arms around me and clutches me just as hard, then starts crying into my chest. Her small shoulders are shaking in my arms.
“Shhhh, it’s okay babe. It’s okay.” This is what I’m here for, to take care of her when she needs it. She’s finally letting me in enough to do this for her. I pick her up and carry her down the hall to her bedroom, laying her on the bed. I toe out of my shoes and lie down next to her, holding her to me as she sobs, my heart breaking a little more with each tear she sheds.
When the tears finally stop, I look down and see that her eyes have closed. She looks as if she’s barely slept in the last five days.
Who am I to talk? I haven’t either.
I watch her beautiful face as she sleeps, her lips slightly parted and her thick lashes fanned against her hollow cheeks. Did she call me here to break up with me face to face? I don’t think she’d let me comfort her if that were true, but if I’ve learned one thing about Sydney, it’s that she’s impossible to predict.
Her eyes flutter and open and gaze into mine without a single hint of regret that I’m here. “Drew,” she whispers as she threads her hand up into my hair. “I’m not going anywhere.”
My heart soars at her words. When she leans in and gently kisses me, my fear ebbs and I hungrily kiss her back. “God, Sydney,” I groan as I hold her against me, allowing myself to revel in the feeling of her body next to mine.
She knows who I am and she’s still here, wanting to be with me. I have to tell her how I feel now that I’ve been given another chance. “I love you, Sydney. I can’t be without you.”
Her hand grips my hair tighter. “I love you too, Drew. I’m sorry I ran. I won’t do it again.”
Fuck, she feels the same as I do. I roll us until she’s beneath me on the bed and crush my lips to hers. Our tongues explore and rediscover what we almost lost and my head spins from the emotions that flood me.
“Sydney, I want you. I need to know that you’re still mine,” I moan against her lips then drag my mouth down her neck, breathing in her perfect fragrance.
She breathlessly nods and it’s all the consent that I need. I grab her shirt and rip it off, throwing it aside. Then I yank my own shirt over my head and toss it. Her lacy blue bra covers nothing, her pink nipples prominent beneath the scrap of fabric. I nip at them with my teeth and groan when they harden from my mouth.
The lust, the desire, the love I feel overwhelms me. I have to have her, now.
“I can’t wait,” I tell her as I start to quickly remove the rest of my clothes.
Sydney sheds hers as well. She’s as desperate as I am to heal the rift between us. I lay back down over her and skim my fingers down her arms, wrapping them around her wrists and pulling them up to hold over her head. She writhes beneath me, throwing her head back when I lick across her collarbone and trail hot kisses up her neck.
Sydney arches her back and shifts her hips, moaning when my cock slides over her wet pussy. The response I get from her is so sexy that I rut against her several times just to watch her squirm.
When it seems as though she’s about to beg me to fuck her, I slide a hand down between her legs and part her slick folds.
“Jesus, I missed you,” I sigh.
I take a condom out of my discarded pants and tear it open with my teeth, rolling it on one handed so I don’t have to release her trapped wrists. I position my cock at her entrance, prolonging the pleasure by pushing in only a fraction.
Frustrated, Sydney wraps her long legs around my waist and squeezes, trying to force me into her. I lap at her mouth, our teeth clashing as we furiously attack each other. She whimpers when I break the kiss, but only so I can stare right into her irresistible blue eyes as I sink into her welcoming depths.
“You feel so fucking good, Syd.” My voice is close to breaking from the overpowering emotion of this moment. She’s mine, she loves me, she’s back with me… safe.
I finally let go of Sydney’s hands and begin to move inside her, sliding in and out slowly, tantalizingly, her lithe body pinned beneath mine. I let my hands roam her smooth skin, caressing her breasts and skimming down to grip her waist.
“I love you Sydney,” I tell her, our eyes still locked together.
She lifts her hips off of the bed in perfect rhythm with my strokes. The heat begins to build inside me, spreading up from my balls as they get heavy, primed to explode. I increase the pace, snapping my hips forward, pounding harder and drawing long wails from Sydney as she struggles to hold off her climax.
“I love you so much,” I whisper as I capture her mouth with mine. I continue my affirmations as I drag my teeth along her neck, “I can’t live without you,” and up to her ear, “we belong together.”
“God, Drew, I love you so much,” Sydney cries out right as she hits her peak.
“Fuck Sydney, don’t ever leave me again,” I groan as she comes, her pussy clamps down and milks my cock until I fall over the edge into ecstasy. Jolts of pleasure are forced out of my body until I’ve been completely drained.
Exhausted, I lay on top of her, placing soft kisses on her swollen lips as we catch our breath. When I slip out of her and pull her close, I’m asleep before my head lands on the pillow.
Hours later I wake up to an empty bed. Sydney is gone. Alarmed, I bolt upright in the bed, scared shitless that she left me again. The smell fresh coffee brewing in the other room lets me know that she’s still in the apartment somewhere, and I’m clearly overreacting.
Fuck. Get your shit together, Forrester.
Once I calm my racing heart, I pull on a shirt and wander out of the bedroom to find Sydney. She’s in the living room, sitting quietly on the couch with her usual steaming cup of coffee.
“Good morning gorgeous.” I kiss the top of her head, unable to resist inhaling her addictive fragrance one more time. ‘Is there more coffee?”
She attempts to get up and fetch me a cup. “Yes, there’s a pot in the kitchen. I’ll get it for you.”
“No, sit. Relax, Sydney. I’ll be right back.”
As I pour some coffee my heart starts pounding against my ribcage. We’re going to have to talk about this, about us, about who I am and how I lied to her. All of my cards are laid out on the table. Will she show me hers? Or will I be left floundering in the dark, never understanding this mysterious girl?
Steeling myself for the worst, I pick up my mug and walk back into the living room, taking the seat next to Sydney. Determined to figure her out, I pull her legs across my lap so she’ll have to face me while we talk. No ducking her head or averting her eyes this time.
After a few minutes of awkward silence, I decide that I may as well start since she’s not much of a talker.
“You scared me, Sydney. I didn’t know what happened to you. I couldn’t get here. The damn flights kept getting fucked up.” I drag my free hand through my hair, clutching my mug tightly in the other. “Then I find out I’m too late. That … well, you know, Kiera, told you,” I snarl. “I came here with Leah; you wouldn’t answer your phone, or the door. I thought … I thought …” my voice hitches. “I don’t understand why, Sydney.”
Hesitantly, she reaches up and touches my cheek, letting her fingers caress my skin before dropping her hand into her lap. “I know babe, I know. I’m so sorry. I want to tell you everything. I was going to tell you before the party, as a kind of birthday present. I guess we both have secrets. Great birthday, huh?”
I lean in and press my forehead to hers, willing her to close the gap between us, to let me past her carefully constructed walls. “I don’t give a shit about my birthday and it doesn’t matter what you tell me, Sydney. I’ll still love you.”
She swallows nervously, her fingers carelessly pulling at a thread on her T-shirt. “My childhood was … different.” Holy shit she’s actually telling me! “My parents, they weren’t exactly normal.”
Rage begins to swirl in my gut at the thought of someone hurting her and I can feel my eyes narrow. “What did they do to you?”
“Drew, it’s not like that.” She pauses and takes a deep breath. “My parents are Evangeline Allen and Reid Tannen. I’m Sydney Tannen.”
What? My mind starts spinning, trying to make sense of this information. The only Evangeline Allen and Reid Tannen I know of are actors.
“So you … your parents are Evangeline Allen and Reid Tannen, the actors,” I repeat.
This doesn’t make sense. I thought she had a traumatic childhood or something, not raised by two of the wealthiest people in Hollywood.
“Yes. My mom took me away from California when I was twelve. My parents didn’t feel that I was … that I was … safe anymore. The photographers, the lies, the stalkers, the crazy people…” her voice trails off as she struggles to finish.
Holy fuck, I remember now! I was young, maybe a freshman in college when they divorced.
Each piece of the horrifying puzzle slowly drops into place and I become more and more agitated as I speak. “I remember…the accident with your dad, the photographer who caused it. It was in the papers and on TV. I had just started school at Boston College …” Jesus, she was almost killed! “You were seriously hurt, Sydney! Your dad was arrested!”
“Yes.”
That’s all she says about being one of the highest profile victims of the paparazzi’s reckless pursuits. Her childhood was a fucking nightmare because of her parents’ fame. That’s why she hates everything that has to do with…me.
I look down and see her rubbing her right arm and pull it towards me, flipping it over. There it is, the long pink line I saw the first day I met her. It’s faded over time but still quite visible. I gasp when I realize what it is, what I saw in my gym. A reminder of everything that was completely fucked up about her childhood.
The breath is knocked out of my lungs, the invisible punch so strong that I have to fight not to hunch over and writhe in pain. It’s over. Sydney can’t be with someone like me. I will completely obliterate everything that is left of this damaged girl. As much as it hurts, as much as my heart is shattering into a million pieces and leaving a hollow spot in my chest, I have to let her go.
“I understand,” I whisper. “My world scares you. It destroyed you. I’m so selfish Sydney. I had no idea; you don’t need this in your life. You don’t need me.” I close my eyes and push her legs off of my lap, needing to get out of here before she sees me break down.
“No Drew, I do need you,” Sydney says in a panicked voice. “Whatever your life is, it’s what I want as long as you’re there with me.” She scrambles to grab me and tries to pull me back to her.
I look at her warily, two seconds from losing my shit over this entire crappy situation.
“That’s what I’ve been figuring out these past few days. I was at my mom’s in Belize. She helped me realize that I can’t keep hiding.”
As much as my splintered heart is more than willing to be selfish and stay with her, my head is telling me to push her away. To prevent my world from tearing her apart until nothing is left.
“Can you really live like that Sydney? The paparazzi? The fans? That’s all part of the Andrew Forrester package. It’s even worse now than it was back then, the internet and cell phone cameras and tabloid shows … it never stops. I mean shit, Sydney, there was even a blog the day after the party with a picture and an article that described how I argued with Kiera Radcliff and Adam Reynolds at Verve, fighting over an ‘unknown female’!” I shout, angry and hurt at this whole fucked up situation. “One of the guests must have used their camera phone. If they find out who you are? It will go worldwide in about a half a second! I’m no good for you. I can’t protect you from that.” My voice is frantic and emotional as I try to describe my life in a way that she’ll understand.
I attempt to unwind her hands from my shirt so I can escape the torture of losing her, but Sydney determinedly climbs up onto my lap and wraps her arms around my neck, clinging for dear life.
“Drew, I lost a lot when I was a child. I lost my home, my friends, my father…” Tears slide down her cheeks as she looks into my eyes and describes her shitty childhood. “I refuse to let our child lose those things too, simply because I’m too afraid to stand up and live my life.”
Child? Our child?
“What?” I rasp. In that moment, I swear, the tattered remains of my heart stop, and my entire world collapses into a tiny pinprick containing only the two of us sitting on this couch.
“Our child, Drew. I’m pregnant.”
I can’t think or move. My mind can’t make sense of this. It’s too much.
“Child? But you said the test was negative. Are you sure?”
I try to stay stoic for Sydney, to not break down in front of her. If she’s pregnant, then nothing else matters. Fuck the bullshit, the fake Hollywood crap, Adam Reynolds and all of that. The only thing I care about is Sydney and the child she carries inside.
Sydney’s cheeks redden with embarrassment. “I took the test a week too soon. I didn’t know there was a time frame in which it wouldn’t work. I’ve been sick for a few weeks, I can’t eat much. I thought it was stress, but I realized that it all added up to one thing. Yes, I’m sure that I’m pregnant, Drew.”
She looks up at me, unsure, and I know in that moment, that we’ll have each other. I’ll do my best to protect her and the baby from whatever shit life throws our way.
Ecstatic, I pull her to me and hug her tight, crushing my mouth over hers. “I love you so much Sydney,” I tell her, laughing. “I guess I shouldn’t be this happy, but I am.”
I can’t stop grinning, everything is perfect now. All of our secrets are out and we’re going to be parents. I can hardly believe it. Sydney’s expression mirrors mine, elated.
“I’m happy too, Drew. Scared shitless, but happy.”
“We’re actually going to do this?”
“Yes, we are. We’ll figure it out together. I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow if you want to go.”
“Of course I want to go.” Then I remember that I can’t just walk in the front door like a normal human being. “Do they have a back entrance?”
And so it begins. Sydney’s about to find out just how hard it is to be with Andrew Forrester, movie star.