He jumped.
Literally leapt right down into a dark, suspicious hole where a killer was squatting.
What the hell was he thinking?
I raced over to stare down, prepared to throw myself down there if needed.
“It’s okay,” he called out. “I’m fine. I’ll be right up.”
Is he out of his mind?
Who was he talking to down there, and why did the voice seem familiar? Not at all like a man.
There was no yelling or gunfire (thank God), nothing that made me think something terrible was going on down there.
If nothing terrible, then what?
What the hell is happening?
Standing up, I paced a little, staying very close to the opening. I knew I needed to get down there immediately. The desire to find out exactly what was hidden in that hole, what made up the space, was intense.
But…
Something was holding me back.
Eddie was down there. He wasn’t screaming or fighting. That meant it must sort of be safe. Right?
Probably not.
I was scared. So scared my limbs were shaking and I kinda felt I might pee my pants.
PS: Don’t tell anyone about that part. How embarrassing.
What if I went down there and never came back up? What if the door blew shut or the man showed up and locked me down there?
What if I went down and the last eleven years replayed in my head on fast-forward and my life was changed forever?
Eddie made a sound, and I rushed back over. There was a soft glow somewhere down there to one side.
“Eddie?” I called.
He didn’t answer.
My tummy twisted. I began chewing my nails.
“Eddie, are you okay?” I called out again.
Still nothing.
I jumped up, pacing away. Then paced back.
I was going down there. To hell with the consequences. If it were me, Eddie would already be down there, ready to fight.
I charged over, determination (or maybe adrenaline) filling my limbs. There was a metal ladder leading down into the hole. It was thin, unsafe, and frankly scary looking. I turned around and dropped my feet on the top rung. The metal vibrated loudly, making my entire lower body quake, but I didn’t stop.
I started climbing down, the metal groaning and shifting as I went.
“Oh my God! He’s coming! He’s coming. Hide!” a woman screeched. My body reacted, turning toward her yell. That voice was familiar to me…
“Hello?”
“It’s not him,” Eddie said. “It’s okay. No one’s going to hurt you.”
Who was he talking to?
“Amnesia.” Eddie appeared out of the dark when I was just about at the bottom. My fingers hurt from gripping the metal so hard. “What are you doing?”
“I called for you. You didn’t answer,” I replied.
He reached out, completely lifted me off the ladder, and put me gently on my feet. His chin lifted toward the surface where the sunlight streamed in. “We can’t all be down here,” he said, grim.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, gazing around.
“Don’t be sorry,” he said, leaning over and kissing my temple. “You were scared.”
“I still am,” I whispered.
Eddie wrapped an arm around me, and I leaned my cheek into his chest with a sigh. From the safety of his arms, my eyes gazed around the poorly lit space.
The walls were rock, as though this place were carved right into the land. The floor was hard, uneven, and dirty. I had a distinct memory of what it felt like to be dragged across the surface, completely naked, and flinched.
Eddie’s other arm came around me, and I gripped his arm.
There was a crude wooden table and chains… lots of thick, rusty-looking chains.
My eyes moved past them, past the empty side of the room, where a wadded-up article of clothing lay, then on toward the light… and the girl who stood within it.
The second our eyes collided, I gasped and straightened away from Eddie.
“Sadie,” I murmured without even meaning to.
“You remember,” she said, staring at me as intently as I looked back at her.
“You’re Sadie,” I echoed, shock rippling through me.
She started to say something, but I spun, tears flooding my vision, and looked at Eddie. “I’m not her,” I said, voice weak and wobbly. “I’m not Sadie.”
He shook his head. “No, baby. You aren’t.”
I collapsed against him, a sob ripping from my chest. As I cried, my mind raced. I’d come here for answers, thinking I would find my kidnapper. Thinking I would find proof of what everyone already knew.
That I was Sadie. The girl who vanished over eleven years ago.
Turns out everyone was right to doubt it. Even Eddie.
I wasn’t Sadie. She was. And I knew her… but I didn’t know how.
I didn’t know how I knew any of this place, but it was so obvious I did.
I’m not Sadie. Just like Widow West said.
He doesn’t love you. The vile echo cracked through my mind, and I flinched.
“Hey,” Eddie murmured, brushing at my hair. “It’s okay.”
It wasn’t okay. Nothing I thought I knew was right. Was anything?
“If I’m not her, then who am I?” I pulled back and looked up at Eddie.
He cupped my cheek, and I pushed my face into his palm. “Amnesia,” he answered. “My Amnesia.”
Across the room, Sadie made a sound. Eddie jerked away from me, going to her immediately. She started crying before he reached her, and I watched him wrap his arms around her.
I stared at them for long moments, trying to wrap my head around even just an ounce of this.
I heard her voice, tried to listen to what she said, but I was lost in my own head, in my own world.
Again, I looked around the room, seeing things that were familiar to me, and succumbed to a sudden entourage of emotion that drained me instantly.
This place was so vile. So horrible.
I’d prayed to die down here more than I prayed for escape. Pain echoed through my body, especially where my arm was snapped and on my back where I’d been whipped.
Suddenly, a loud cry broke out over the room. Someone started yelling, Stop, please stop! She’s going to die!
This is all your fault, Sadie.
All. Your. Fault.
The whistle of leather cutting through air and then the sharp slap it made against skin was distinct. I fell to my knees as pain unlike any other befell me.
Someone was screaming, writhing in pain, but the beating just went on.
You’re next, Sadie, he intoned. You’re next if you don’t shut up.
Vomit burned the back of my throat. I felt it hurl up through my body and eject from my mouth. My knees felt scraped and raw, but the pain was subdued compared to the pain in my back.
I heaved again, reality clashing with memory. I didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. I didn’t even know who I was.
“Who am I?” I asked and then heaved again, the vomit burning as it came up. It hurt so bad my lungs felt even they might collapse.
You’re mine, a deep voice intoned. You’re no one’s but mine.
“Amnesia!” Eddie pleaded. “Jesus, please.”
“Eddie?” I asked, lifting my head. It felt I was coming out of my coma all over again. Confusion and light warred within me. I coughed.
“Am, baby, it’s okay. You’re out now. You’re out of that twisted cave.”
“What?” I moaned.
“You’re here with me. No one’s going to hurt you. Cross my heart.”
“Hope to die,” I whispered. “You will be forever mine.” The words, though I spoke them, calmed me. Probably because those were Eddie’s original words.
I felt his hands in my hair. Everything seemed to come back, realign. I no longer felt I was on the world’s best (or worst) tilt-a-whirl. Opening my eyes, I saw Eddie above me, the sun at his back, black curls glistening and ruffled in the wind.
I felt myself smile up at him. “What happened?” I asked, sitting up.
“You had some kind of panic attack,” he said, concern darkening his face. “Being down there was too much.”
It all came back to me, and I shuddered. “We’re out?”
“Of course. I carried you out the second you collapsed.”
“I think I threw up.” I wrapped an arm around my belly.
“It’s okay. That place makes me wanna barf, too.”
I wanted to smile, but reality was too much right now. “I want to leave.” I asserted.
“Me, too. This place sucks.”
I grabbed his wrist. He gazed at me with a question in his eyes. “What about Sadie?”
“I’ll get her and then we can go.” He paused. “You okay?”
I nodded firmly, and he left my side.
So she was coming with us, then. Of course she was. Leaving her here was not an option. I, of all people, knew what she’d been through. Even just the small portion I recalled was hell.
And she remembered it all.
She belonged in Lake Loch. She deserved to have her life back. Maggie was her mother’s best friend. Joline and Jeremy knew her parents, and Eddie was her childhood love. Even Robbie had been her friend.
Those people, they were her people.
They were mine, too, right?
Everyone had been missing Sadie so much for the past eleven years. So much they’d all wanted to believe I’d been her. They opened their arms to me, their homes. Was it all because they thought I was her?
I know I wasn’t supposed to feel I was living someone else’s life because technically all the time I spent living in Lake Loch was mine.
But I couldn’t help it.
I couldn’t help but wonder just how drastically the answers I found today would change everything.