15
TAUSHEN
I see the expression on Brooke’s face change when she realizes I have tricked her. I knew it was coming. I have been expecting this, and I am ready for her anger.
She gazes around the cave—a hunter cave, tucked away in the cliffs—and focuses on the rocky walls, the small interior, and then finally narrows her eyes at me. “You wanna explain?”
“This is not the fruit cave,” I begin.
“No shit, Sherlock.” She folds her arms over her chest and gives me a look.
I pause, because those words make no sense. When she does not explain, I continue on. “We did not get lost. I led you here deliberately.”
Her fingers begin to drum on her arm. “Mmmhhmmm. Go on.”
I shrug. “There is nothing else to say. Are you cold now that you are out of the wind? Should I make you tea?”
Brooke gapes at me. “No, I don’t want tea. I want answers! Where are we?”
“In a hunter cave. There are dozens scattered in our hunting grounds.” I move toward the fire, making sure that it continues to burn well. It looks to be a cold night, and I want to make sure my female stays warm. She needs the heat far more than I do. “When we are out on the trails for long times, we come to these caves to sleep and get supplies.”
“Gee, that’s nice. What are we doing here when we’re supposed to be at a fruit cave, gathering food for the tribe?”
I stare into the fire for a moment, trying to think of the best way to phrase my answer. When no brilliant response comes to mind, I glance up at her. “I stole you.”
“Stole me?” she repeats, emphasizing my words. “Why would you steal me?”
“It is a tradition amongst my people that when one wishes to mate a human, you steal her away to convince her.” I feel exposed, vulnerable at such a confession. I do not want her to laugh or be offended. I do not want her to be angry that I have stolen her away from the others when she would have resonated to one of them. I do not mention that at all.
“You stole me because you want to mate me?” She smacks a hand against her forehead and groans. “Are you serious?”
“I am always serious,” I tell her. Why does she need confirmation of such a thing?
“Taushen, buddy, we need to talk.” Brooke bites her lip and tries to look patient, but fails. “You can’t just freaking steal a person away. And you can’t just mate me without my permission!”
“Then give me your permission.”
“What? No! I’m not mating anyone!” She flings her hands into the air. “This is ridiculous. I can’t believe you stole me! And I walked right into this!” She tilts her head back, staring up at the ceiling of the cave. “Incredible. I should have known that when it felt like ten hours of walking instead of two, it really was ten.”
I say nothing. There are no words that feel right for this situation. I try to gauge her mood instead. Is she angry? Amused? It is difficult to tell.
She rubs her forehead and gives a deep sigh. “So what is this, then? You stole me because…?”
“Because you are mine,” I tell her, surprised she has to ask such a thing. How does she not know this? Did I not tell her such things when we were together? “You belong to me.”
That makes her angry. Her little brows go down and she scowls. “Slow your roll, buddy. I don’t belong to anyone but me.” She jabs a thumb at her teats. “Not to alien slavers, not to you, and not to anyone else that thinks they can put a collar on me and own me. Me.”
Collar her? She thinks I would collar her?
I would never do such a thing. I want to take care of her and make sure all her needs are met. I want her to be happy. I want to hear her cries of pleasure and know that she is truly with me in both body and spirit. That when she clings to me, it is not because she has been given something to make her react in such a way. I want her to crave my touch as badly as I crave hers.
This is what I want. There are no collars involved, no strange drinks to make her react. There is only that which is freely given.
But the ability to tell her such a thing escapes me. I pause, trying to think of the right way to say how I feel. My throat tightens and I can only glare. “You…mine.”
Brooke’s delicate snort is derisive. “Thanks for asking how I feel about things before just deciding to run with your crazy ideas.”
I did not ask her, this is true. But I knew she would not agree. She has never indicated that she would be willing to abandon the tribe for something as selfish as time alone together. And perhaps she wanted to stay behind because…because she wants to mate one of the newcomers.
The thought makes me burn with anger. Just imagining her in the arms of one of the strangers makes my resolve harden. I scowl up at her. “I did not ask, no.”
“And so now we’re here all night, alone. No one knows where we are. What if something happened to us?” She looks furious at me. I knew she would not be pleased that I lied, but…I do not know how to react in the face of her anger. Part of me thought she would be flattered at my declaration that I wished to mate her, not annoyed.
I have read the entire situation wrong. She hates me now.
“Nothing will happen to us,” I tell her. Or try to, but she is not listening. She is pacing, her expression angry.
“All those hours of walking,” she mutters to herself. “And I never even thought to ask why it was taking so long. I’m crazy.”
I grunt. I have never thought of her as crazy. She is intelligent and clever, though I suspect she will not wish to hear that from me right now.
Her arms cross over her chest, emphasizing her magnificently protruding teats, and she whirls to face me again. “I’m an idiot for not asking, but you’re a bigger idiot for thinking this was a good idea. They’re going to the ocean tomorrow. The spaceship is leaving. My guess is that they’ll just swing by to grab the two of us and then you’re going to be in a shit-ton of trouble, Taushen.”
Does she think I have not considered this? That I am a kit who thinks no further than his own hand? I straighten one of the rocks edging the fire pit, indignant. “They will not come for us. Hassen will tell them what we have done. They will assume we wish to be alone together.”
“Hassen was in on this? That dirty little freak.” She growls low in her throat, clenching her small fists with anger. “I am so telling his mate on him.”
I almost grin at that, because I can just imagine boisterous Mah-dee’s response. She will probably yell at Hassen for a time…and then drag him to their furs so he can apologize to her properly. “As for Vektal…” I continue. “They will not be coming for us. They will respect our wishes to be alone and they will carry on their plan to take the others to the great salt lake. Hassen will tell them we will meet up with them there.”
Brooke makes an outraged noise in her throat. “Respect our wishes to be alone, huh? Oh, for fuck’s sake. You guys really have no concept of ‘no means no.’” Her words are furious, but her expression is merely exasperated, as if I am a naughty, misbehaving kit. “Well, this was silly and a waste of a day.” She gets her wrap and pulls it back around her shoulders. “We should get going if we’re going to make it back.”
“Make it back? We are not going back. It is late and you are tired.” I gesture at the fire. “Come and sit here and warm up.”
She looks at me like I am crazy. “We can’t stay! They’re going to think I want to be here with you.”
That wounds me. Am I so terrible to be around? My pride makes me stiffen, and I gesture at the entrance of the cave. “I am not leaving. You are welcome to go.”
A tiny part of me is curious if she will go. Farli would, but she is a huntress. Leezh would, because she is stubborn. And if she goes, I will follow, because I cannot bear the thought of her in danger, walking alone through the dark night. It is an angry dare, nothing more.
“Argh!” Brooke throws her hands up in the air. “I don’t know how to get back!”
I have to stop myself from smiling. “Then it seems you will stay with me.”
“You are such a creep for pulling this,” she grumbles, flinging her wrap back off her shoulders and then sitting down on the floor near the fire and tugging at the laces of her sodden boots. “So now what happens?”
“You stay with me,” I say simply, getting to my feet.
She looks up at me, disbelief on her face. “For how long?”
I have no answer for that. Until I no longer am burning with jealousy at the thought of her laughing at another male? Until the others have all resonated to different partners and I can bring her back? When she has no other option for a mate except me and my useless khui? Or until we tire of each other? Except I think I will never grow weary of her and her fierce spirit. I only seem to crave her more with each day that passes, until I am practically out of my head with the wanting of her. “Until you stop smiling at others,” I say, deciding that is the best thing to tell her.
She makes another exasperated sound and throws her hands in the air. “You’ve got to be kidding. Smiling is a problem?”
“Smiling like you want something from them,” I say, surly. “Like you think they are wonderful.”
“You think I’m flirting?”
I shrug. We do not call it such in my tribe. It would be harmless if it were anyone else…but this is Brooke. My Brooke. I want all her smiles for myself.
“It’s called being friendly, jackass. What have you got against that?” she asks, eying me curiously. Realization dawns on her face. “Are you jealous?”
There’s a wondering note in her voice that makes my frustration rise. Does she not realize what she does to me? How her very presence makes me react? How much I want her?
“Of course I am jealous,” I bite out, my tail flicking. “You smile at other males but never at me. You chatter and touch their hair, and ignore me. You touch their arms, but you hate my touch. You give your happy thoughts freely to others, and there are none for me. I want all of it. I want everything you have. I want your tears, your touches, your smiles, your frowns. I want it all, and I do not wish to share. I want to put you in my furs and devour you whole. The thought of four more males waking up and joining the tribe? Of you smiling and laughing with them? Touching them? Plaiting their hair? Taking them to your furs? It makes me crazy.” I rake my hand through my mane in frustration, but it only falls over my horns and gets in my face.
“I think we’re jumping to conclusions a little when you go from hair-braiding to sleeping together—”
“I do not want you resonating to them,” I say fiercely. “I do not want any male near you. I want you as mine and only mine.” My voice lowers to a growl as I meet her eyes. “Mine, Brooke. Mine and only mine.”
“Resonate…to one of them?” Her voice is breathless and her gaze drops to my mouth, as if fascinated by my words. “I don’t think so.”
Rokan does, though. I keep this thought to myself. “You do not know for certain.”
“I know I’m not ready to resonate to anyone,” she says softly, stepping forward and closing the gap between us. Her gaze flicks over my face and then rests on my mouth again. “But I’m allowed to flirt if I want to. You don’t own me, Taushen. You’re not my father, either.”
“I do not want to be your father,” I snarl, beyond frustration. I am so full of need for her that I ache, and she speaks of her father? “I want to be your mate. The one who gets all your touches, all your caresses. The only one.”
“That’s so primitive of you,” she breathes, and then she grabs me by my mane and pulls me down against her. Her mouth slams against mine, and then she’s got her lips pressed to mine, and her tongue seeks entrance into my mouth.
I am stunned at her reaction—I thought she was furious with me. I thought she hated me.
But…her mouth on mine is fiercely sweet and insistent, and I cannot resist. I cup her face and return the kiss, pouring all my frustration and need into it. Let her see how much I need her, how much I crave her touch. My tongue slicks against hers and it is the best feeling in the world, second only to pushing deep into her wet, welcoming cunt.
Judging from the way she gasps in response, the soft noises she makes, I would wager she feels the same. That it is as good for her as it is for me. Her mouth breaks from mine and she sighs happily. After a moment, she moves her hand down my front and caresses my cock through my leathers with a throaty little chuckle. “Maybe you take your pants off and show me what you’ve got, hmm?”
Again, I am surprised by her response. To think she would be so passionate after telling me she did not want my touch…
Suspicion rises in my mind, and I think of the teasing smiles she has given other men. The laugh when she wants something. I was not paying attention, too distracted by her kiss to remember if the laugh she gave me was a true one or a fake one. “Do you do this because you want me?” I ask, breathing hard under her arousing touch. “Or because you wish for me to do something for you?”
She gasps and pulls her hand away as if burned, and I know in that moment I have made a mistake. “Maybe I just wanted to touch you, you dick.” Brooke looks hurt, and I ache inside at her wounded expression.
I reach for her. “Then touch me.”
“No!” she cries, snatching her hands away from me. “The moment’s passed. You killed it dead.” She pushes me away and takes a step back. “Way to go. Here I’d been feeling lonely and hoping we could…” She shakes her head. “You know what? You’re an asshole, and I hope you’re happy with having a super-bitchy companion for the next while because that’s all you’re going to get from me.”
Panic rises inside my mind. She touched me because she wanted me? Not because she wished for me to do something for her? She wanted to mate and I have pushed her away?
This is my fault for not trusting myself. For not imagining that such a perfect female would truly wish for me. Not after what we have been through. “Brooke…I am sorry.”
“It’s too late for sorry.” She rubs her arms, looking small and lost and hurt. I did this, and the realization makes my gut churn. She steps away. “Don’t talk to me.”
“I have made a mistake,” I tell her. “I admit this. I did not think…”
“You thought I was going to flip my hair and suck your dick to get what I wanted? What does that say of your opinion of me?” Her look is scathing, and I realize with shame that she is right.
I have acted terribly. I have pushed her away, and this time it is no one’s fault but my own.