MPREG Romance
Alpha Bear
Chapter 1
I ducked out of the way of the fist hurdling toward my face. I could feel the disturbance of the air on my cheek from Walker’s power.
“Fuck off, man!” I growled.
“You fuck off, Decker!”
What a clever retort.
“You don’t want to make me angry, Walker,” I said as evenly as possible. But it was too late. I was already balling my fists, and powerful surges of adrenaline were coursing through my body. If I wasn’t careful, I would shift soon. Then he would be really sorry for messing with the man destined to be alpha.
Walker’s response was to throw another badly-aimed blow toward me. Again, he missed. I was getting really tired of him trying to start some kind of pissing contest with me. All Walker had ever wanted was to be the most powerful bear shifter in New Orleans, and had coveted the alpha position since we were kids. Now that we were adults and it was clear that he was bottom of the barrel in the hierarchy, he was always trying to climb the ladder by picking fights with me. Unfortunately for both of us.
“I’m serious, Walker. Leave.”
I couldn’t believe I was able to muster so much patience for this man. But when he tried to strike me in the face again, that was the last straw.
“God damn it,” I growled. I unleashed a violent roar that made Walker’s shit-brown eyes widen in terror. He was about to see what he got for fucking with someone more powerful than he was.
“Hey, guys, what’s going on?”
I was surprised out of my fury by Jake’s silky sweet voice. I hesitated before striking Walker and looked over my shoulder at the man I’d been in love with since junior high. Jake was grinning knowingly at me. He had seen this fight before, many times, and it never ended any differently.
“Same old,” I grumbled, my racing heart beginning to feel the seductive effects of Jake’s comforting presence. I was somehow sedated, and couldn’t keep my eyes off of Jake as he made his way toward us.
“You both know this isn’t worth it,” Jake said, walking between me and Walker. I cringed when Jake’s muscular arm draped over Walker’s shoulder. They looked briefly at each other and I couldn’t help but feel a jealous bile rise in my throat. “Why don’t you guys find something better to do? Like buying me a beer in the best pub in all of goddamn New Orleans?”
I sighed. Walker was lucky Jake was there. I wouldn’t have been able to keep from beating his ass for anyone else.
“Fine,” Walker grumbled. He knew he would have ended up in the hospital without Jake’s intervention, but was still infuriatingly cocky about it.
I followed a few steps behind Walker as Jake led the way to the bar that our bear pack owned and operated, right in the hustle and bustle of downtown New Orleans. Soon, Jake fell behind and walked beside me, his grey eyes sparkling.
“You almost lost it back there, Deck,” he said. “You know you have to be careful. What if a human sees you two fight and it gets out of hand? You could shift right in front of them and really cause problems.”
“Well I didn’t,” I grumbled.
“Thanks to me!” Jake exclaimed. “You know how sad this place would be if you got found out?”
“That’s probably what Walker is counting on,” I said, glancing at Jake. His face seemed dark for a moment, and I felt an odd pang of concern. Jake was a carefree type of guy. If he ever worried, it was usually cause for alarm. I liked to think I knew him better than the back of my hand, and felt a strong urge to ask him what was on his mind.
“Well, you just be careful,” Jake said, before I had a chance.
His face brightened up with his characteristic grin. I forgot my worry, and Jake glanced around to make sure nobody was watching before he squeezed my hand. I felt a surge of warmth course through me. He was always looking out for me, even when it meant he could get in trouble for it.
“Aha!” Jake exclaimed. “Beer time!”
We had arrived at the pub, and Walker pushed violently through the door. I cringed, but Jake smiled warmly at me.
“Don’t let him get to you,” Jake said, his grey eyes boring reassuringly into mine. “We all know who the real alpha is around here.”
“Not yet,” I sighed, stealthily kissing Jake on the cheek. “But that will change soon enough.”
Jake’s face grew dark again, and I frowned. Something really was on his mind.
“That’s right,” Jake said, with no trace of the darkness on his face coming through in his voice. “Everything changes eventually.”
I had no idea how right he was.
Chapter 2
“I’m going out, babe,” Jake called.
I opened my eyes and groaned when the light pierced into them. I was still tangled in the bedsheets, left in the same exhausted position I’d been in when Jake had finished with my body. We’d been out drinking with Walker until daylight. When we got back to our apartment, Jake had been unusually aggressive with me. I figured it was just from the excitement of the fight he had prevented.
“Okay,” I mumbled, glancing at the clock. Jesus. We’d only been sleeping for two hours. What could he possibly be doing?
Whatever it was, I didn’t care so long as I got to go back to sleep.
I heard the front door slam shut, and the jingle of his keys as he locked up behind himself. I curled up in the spot where Jake’s body had been, feeling comfortable beyond words as I snuggled into the feathery pillow that was ripe with his scent. I fell into a sleep-like state as my mind replayed the first time we’d kissed.
“You looked good out there,” I’d said, trying not to show on my face just how unbelievable I found Jake’s perfect form as he sprinted around the track. Black bears were fast – really fast – and in order to fit in to human society, we had to find ways to channel our true selves and use it to fit in with the rest of the crowd. It was a difficult balance, but it was one that Jake had found easily by joining the track team in high school.
“Thanks!” Jake had replied, straying from the track to the fence separating the bleachers from the field. “You should join. I know you would probably blow me out of the water.”
I grinned and shook my head. “No, I’m not interested.”
Jake and I were very different. I liked to be by myself most of the time, while Jake was the kind of guy who thrived when all eyes were on him. In fact, he had been absurdly popular all through school. When we had been partnered in the science lab in junior high, I’d honestly expected to hate him. We had seen each other briefly at shifter gatherings before, but he’d seemed like such a conceited asshole that I’d stayed away from him. But during the project we did together, I realized that he was actually a smart, sweet guy. It had been the beginning of a life-long attraction toward him.
“Well it would make the team a lot more fun if you were here,” Jake said, his grey eyes looking deeply into mine. He had no idea how much I wanted for him to mean that. Even better if it meant that Jake wanted to spend more time with me. I couldn’t get enough of him.
“I’d feel too out of place,” I said. Still, I was tempted to join. Just for the opportunity to spend more time with him outside of class.
“Well then we should do something else. Are you free tonight? Practice is almost over and I don’t have anything to do.”
Jake said this as he toweled off his sweating face, so he likely hadn’t seen the way my face lit up. I used this to my advantage, and tried to compose myself before his intoxicating eyes looked back into mine.
“I think it should be fine,” I said, trying to play it cool. All I ever had on my agenda was homework, and sometimes I even got assignments done weeks early.
“Great,” Jake said. “Wait for me in the parking lot. I’ll drive you somewhere cool.”
I could hardly believe my ears, and waited with butterflies in my stomach until Jake was completely finished with practice. He came out freshly showered and dressed in a crisp white t-shirt and snug jeans. I was embarrassed when he caught me staring at him, but instead of acting like he was weirded out, he grinned at me knowingly. It was the first time such a small gesture electrified my entire body.
“Do you have a curfew?” he asked as we climbed into his car.
“No,” I said. “I don’t live with my parents.”
“What?!” Jake exclaimed. “You live alone?”
I was prepared for him to overreact about it, the way many people had when I informed them that I’d been “emancipated,” but instead his face lit up as if I’d told him the best news he’d ever heard. “That’s so cool!”
I shrugged.
“My father lived in the Bayou…an outcast. And my mother moved here. But they were both killed. So now I take care of myself.”
“I’m sorry,” Jake said, frowning. “I didn’t mean that it’s awesome about your parents…”
I laughed awkwardly. I didn’t want Jake to think that I was some weird, doom and gloom kind of person. I wanted him to like me. I wanted him to think I was cheerful like he was.
“It’s not like you knew that. And it really is cool to live alone,” I said, trying to get the spark back into his eyes.
“I can imagine. My dad is such an ass!” Jake exclaimed, punching his steering wheel. It startled me. “He expects me to be just like he was when he was young. He’s got issues or something. Be glad you don’t have to deal with a dad like that. Sometimes I wish I was an orphan.”
I laughed, even though half of what he was saying made me uncomfortable. He wouldn’t be saying that if it actually happened to him. But it wasn’t like he was trying to step on my toes. He just didn’t understand how hard it was to lose your family.
“This is the spot!” Jake said suddenly, swerving the car and pulling over at the side of the road.
“This?” I asked skeptically. It didn’t seem like there was anything here.
We had driven out of the city limits, to an area I had never been before. It was wooded, and the afternoon was becoming evening. Still, I was thrilled to be anywhere with him.
“Get out, I want to show you my favorite thing.”
I got out of the car nervously, and followed Jake through the thick collection of trees. We walked for about fifteen minutes before we stopped at a marshy stream.
“I come out here alone sometimes,” he said, his voice low. “To shift.”
My eyes widened when Jake took my hands in his own and gripped them tightly. “I want to shift with you.”
His voice was barely above a whisper, and somehow I blurted exactly what I had been thinking the whole time we were together.
“I’ll shift with you if you kiss me first.”
Jake seemed surprised for a moment, but soon a fire lit up his eyes.
Soon, his soft lips were pressed against my own, and we spent the rest of the night running through the woods together, the truest form of ourselves that we could possibly be.
Chapter 3
I woke up groggy a few hours later, long forgotten memories dancing in my head. My dreams had been filled of the youthful adventures that Jake and I had shared. While most of them were real, a few of them were made up, but they were still really special.
I was about to have breakfast when the phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Decker, I need you to come out here, quick,” Jake’s voice exclaimed urgently.
“Why? What’s the matter?” My heart thudded. Something was wrong. Was Jake in danger?
“No time to explain. We’re outside the diner on Route 9. Hurry.”
I dressed in a blind panic and hopped on my motorcycle, speeding toward Route 9. My mind was racing the whole time. What could possibly be going on? Jake had been gone for hours at that point. Anything could have happened.
My bike skidded to a stop and I jumped off with the engine still running, looking wildly for Jake.
“Ungh!”
Something heavy hit my stomach and I dropped to the ground. It took me a moment to recover my senses, but by the time I did another blow to my head knocked me on the ground.
“How do you like that, asshole?” Walker’s voice taunted me.
I got shakily to my feet, ready to shift into my most powerful form to take him on, when suddenly I heard Jake’s voice.
“Good hit, man.”
What was going on. By the time my vision cleared, I was shocked to see Jake with his muscular arms draped over Walker’s shoulder. They kissed in front of me, a long, disgusting display meant to take me off my guard.
“What?” I whispered.
The sound of my voice seemed to remind Walker of what he was doing, and he punched me in the face again. I dropped to my knees, too surprised to even shift.
“I’ll get him from behind,” Jake said. “As usual.”
Their laughter cackled around me as Jake pushed me forward, right into Walker’s awaiting fists. Pain seared through my body, but it was nothing compared to what I felt as I began to process the truth. Jake had betrayed me. He and Walker were together now, and they had probably been planning this mutiny for weeks.
How could I have been so stupid? I had seen the signs. Jake had been acting strange for a while now. The passion in his embrace was gone. Again and again he used my body for his own gratification without caring how I felt. Again and again he had disappeared late in the night only to return almost 48 hours later with alcohol on his breath and an unapologetic smile. How could this be happening to me?
“I think you know what this means, Deck,” Jake said from behind me, his voice taunting. “I know you better than the back of my hand. All your strengths. Your weaknesses. Your strategies. With me and Walker combined, you’re nothing here.”
“Get the hell out of here while you still have a chance,” Walker said, crouching down and staring into my eyes. His eyes were wild, but he was wearing a satisfied grin.
“You’d best listen to him, Decker,” Jake said, circling around until he was finally within my sight. “It’s over. Walker’s the alpha now.”
The grey eyes that I loved so much flashed menacingly. The familiar, bright smile twisted in my direction with a menace I had never hoped to see. I had never felt so hurt.
I got shakily to my feet. Sure, I wanted to fight them. I wanted to be angry enough to shift and tear them both apart. But I just couldn’t summon the strength I needed to do so. I was too broken inside. The man I loved had been using me. Who knew for how long? And I had only myself to blame for my downfall.
And so, with my tail between my legs, I left the city where I had grown up and made a life with Jake. His mocking laughter followed me all the way to the outskirts of town, where I rode away and vowed never to look back.
Chapter 4
I was numb with shock as I drove along the winding streets. I had no idea where to go, and let my body resort to autopilot. My instincts would take me where I was meant to be.
Before long I began to realize that the roads I was on were familiar, and couldn’t help but smile to myself when it dawned on me that I had driven to the Bayou. My father had been born and raised here, and even after my parents had made the heart-wrenching decision to part ways, it had been fun to visit him here occasionally.
The familiar scent of water and earth filled me with a sense of peace, and I knew what I was there to do. I was glad I had taken the motorcycle, because a car would have been impossible to navigate on the narrow roads leading into the marshy land that my father had once called home.
After what seemed like an eternity, I made it into the familiar settlement where my father lived and parked my bike. I wouldn’t need it anymore now that I was here. It was a small place, full of warm, caring people. Who knew if any of them would recognize me.
“Krane?” a deep, confused voice said from behind me. I turned around, surprised to hear my father’s name.
“My name is Decker,” I said apologetically, turning to face him. He had long white hair and a beard like Father Time’s. I felt terrible when the man’s face fell. “Krane was my father.”
“A good man, your father,” the old man said. He spoke slowly. “Couldn’t find a more loyal friend if you tried.”
The man shrugged and turned away from me, headed back along his way.
“Wait,” I called. “Please.”
The man turned slowly and raised an eyebrow at me.
“What do you want from here, son? There’s nothing for a youngun’ like you, raised in the city life. It’s best to stay true to your roots.”
I frowned, tempted to tell the man the whole story. I was aching from the heartbreak, but I knew that I couldn’t. He wouldn’t understand about the ways of the bear shifters. And he probably wouldn’t sympathize with a gay man very much either. I shook my head in exasperation.
“Well I’m not going back, I can tell you that. Do you know of somewhere around here I can stay? I have money.”
The old man sighed and was quiet for a moment. Finally he flicked his head as if to say, “follow me.”
“It gets real damp here at night. Ain’t good for your bones if you’re not used to it,” the man said.
“What’s your name?” I asked, ignoring his insistence that I go back home.
“Arthur,” the man said, leading me slowly down a long, unpaved road. There were a few desolate structures here and there, and the whole place was surrounded by dense forest and water. I could smell the swampy air everywhere I went.
“Thank you for helping me, Arthur.”
“Your dad was a good man. But he wouldn’t have wanted you out here. You should go home.”
“Why wouldn’t he want me out here?” I asked. It wasn’t like I had anywhere else to go.
“Dangerous in these parts,” Arthur said with a heavy sigh. “No good for a boy like you. You look softer than your pap.”
“I’m not soft,” I said, prickling.
Arthur shrugged. I fumed quietly until he finally stopped in front of a big white house.
“This is the Greenwalt place. She borders strays like you. Room and board, and three meals a day. You can talk to her about what she charges. Tell her you’re Krane’s boy, might make a difference. That or she’ll run you out herself. She knew your pap too. Knows this place is no good for the likes of you.”
Arthur nodded and began his slow descent back in the direction we had come from without a word of good bye.
“Nice to meet you too,” I mumbled.
Arthur let out a sharp cackle as if he had heard me. But he was halfway down the road already. That would be impossible, unless –
“Hi, stranger,” a woman’s voice said, interrupting my thoughts. I looked up to find a slender young woman with auburn hair coming through the entrance. She walked gracefully down the wide porch steps to greet me. “Looking for a place to stay?”
I was surprised for a moment, especially by her attire. Did everybody in this place dress like an antique? I knew the Bayou was out of the way and a little bit slow to accept modern trends, but I hadn’t expected anything quite so classic.
“Yes,” I said, trying not to let my surprise show on my face.
“Mama’s out right now, but maybe I can help you,” she said, leading me inside. “What are you looking for exactly?”
“It doesn’t matter. Somewhere with a bed for now while I figure things out.”
“I see,” she said, grinning. She disappeared into a small room and emerged holding out a key.
“My name’s Penelope. You’ll meet mama at supper tonight. We all eat together around 6:00. Don’t be late; everyone’s gonna want to meet you.”
She disappeared swiftly, and I stared down at the key in my hand. I set my mind to finding room number 3, and tried to fight the foreboding in my chest. This was where I was going to stay now. I would have to find a way to fight my attraction to Jake and begin to make it on my own. No matter how hard it was.
Chapter 5
“Supper!” Penelope’s voice rang a few hours later, followed by the deep ding of a bell. I had showered and taken off my button up shirt. It was full of mud from Jake and Walker’s ambush. My pants were still filthy, but I had a feeling that the people around these parts were used to dirty men strutting around.
I was feeling a little too embarrassed to go down and meet everybody in my dirty clothes. Besides that, I wasn’t hungry in the least. I was too upset about what had happened with Jake, and decided to be a recluse and skip the meal.
“Come on, Mr. Decker, come and join the crew,” Penelope’s muffled voice reached me through the door, as she knocked demandingly on the door.
“No thank you,” I said glumly. I couldn’t even conceive of going anywhere for food.
“Mr. Decker, I’m afraid you have no choice if you want to stay in this house. Mama wants to meet you.”
I sighed heavily and caught a glance at myself in the mirror. I tried smoothing my hair down, but it had ideas of its own. It was a brown jungle that had grown shaggy over the past few months. I hadn’t shaved in the past few days, and thick, dark stubble was beginning to form on my face. I looked a little wild, especially in my white undershirt and dirty jeans. I was dreading the upcoming dinner.
“Mr. Decker,” Penelope said, knocking again.
“All right, coming,” I said, unable to hide my irritation.
I slipped my shoes on and opened the door. Penelope smiled at me as if nothing could be wrong anywhere in the world, and I followed her sulkily to the dining room.
I felt like it was the first day of school, and was reluctant to meet the eyes of anybody else in the room. Nobody here would understand anything about me. What was the point in trying to socialize? It was like walking into a class full of oblivious humans all over again.
“Everybody, this is Mr. Decker,” Penelope said, holding her hands in front of me as if displaying a prize on a gameshow.
“You can just call me Decker, it’s my first name,” I mumbled, daring to glance up from my personal hell and scope out the room. There were five other people sitting at the table, some men, some women. One handsome blonde man about my age was staring hard at me, and I held his gaze before he looked down at his plate.
“Nice to meet you, Decker,” a tall, elegant woman who was obviously Penelope’s mother said. She rose to greet me and smiled, the epitome of southern charm. “My name is Abigail, but if you could, call me Miss Abby. Please, join us. We’re about to have us a nice chicken supper. Do you like collards?”
“Actually, I’ve never had them,” I said.
“Oh, young man. I assure you, you have. You just can’t remember.”
I looked up at her, surprised, and she smiled mysteriously.
“Fanny, please fetch Decker here his meal.”
“Of course.”
I was surprised by the tall, pale woman standing in the corner. I had been so consumed by my own thoughts that I hadn’t noticed her. I had a feeling that was part of her job description though; just be a whisper of a person until you were called upon.
“Sit beside Alex, here,” Miss Abby said, gesturing toward the blonde man. He didn’t look up from his plate, and I sat down heavily beside him. I really wasn’t in the mood for socializing. “What brings you about these parts?”
Miss Abby’s heavy southern accent was intoxicating. It reminded me a lot of my mother.
“My father was from here,” I said quietly. “Mr. Arthur told me to let you know.”
“Oh, I already guessed that much,” Miss Abby said, her silver eyes twinkling. “But what brings you here?
I could feel all eyes turned on me, and shifted uncomfortably in my seat.
“I needed a change of scenery, that’s all.”
“Ah,” Miss Abby said, wisely dropping the question. About that time, Fanny brought out a huge plate of food and sat it in front of me. My stomach grumbled despite itself. “Well, it’s a pleasure to have you. If there’s anything you need, I’m usually in the reception hall. And my room is 16, the very top floor.”
I was surprised. Miss Abby certainly wasn’t a spring hen anymore. It seemed strange she’d insist on climbing so many stairs. But I supposed it was good to get exercise. The older you got the more you needed it.
“Now dig in, everybody!” Miss Abby said. Penelope sat down across from me and the meal began. There was pleasant chattering as everybody ate, and I took the opportunity to glance around the table at the other borders in the house. There was an elderly couple, dressed as if they had walked right out of the 1800s, round spectacles and all. Two young women were talking to each other as well, though it was anybody’s guess what their relationship might be. A very stout, middle-aged man didn’t speak at all, and focused all of his efforts on eating. At the end of the table, was a gaunt man, probably around 40 years old, who had his eye fixed hard on me.
“Disgraceful,” he muttered, spooning mashed potatoes onto his plate without taking his eyes off of me. “You had plenty of time to clean up for supper. What happened to you, boy? Who taught you your manners?”
I glowered at my plate, trying to ignore him.
“Leave him be, Eustis,” Miss Abby said sternly.
“But look at him!” Eustis exclaimed, gesturing theatrically at me. “He’s got mud up to his ears!”
“I’m sorry,” I said, looking Eustis firmly in the eye. Whether I was still the alpha of my own pack or not, I wasn’t going to let anybody else fight my battles for me. “I just arrived to town. I left in a hurry. There was no time to pack.”
Everybody at the table was silent as the information registered, and Eustis’ face became drawn.
“Quite a few of us can relate to that,” the handsome blonde man beside me said, turning to look into my eyes. I was shocked by the brilliant blue oceans that I was met with, and he smiled broadly at me.
“That’s right,” the heavy-set man grunted, taking a big bite of chicken. “Welcome to the Bayou, boy. Miss Abby’ll take care of you.”
The meal couldn’t end fast enough for me, and I practically ran out of the dining room once it was all over. Before I could make it to the stairs, however, Miss Abby called my name.
“How did you like the collards?” she asked, gliding gracefully toward me from the dining room.
“They were excellent,” I said honestly, surprised by the question.
She nodded knowingly.
“I fixed them for you same as I did when you were a boy,” Miss Abby said. “Glad to see some things don’t change.”
She smiled and retreated, leaving me in front of the stairs with more questions on my mind than I’d had when I arrived.
Chapter 6
“Decker!”
I looked up as I struggled to unlock the door to my room, and saw Alex, the handsome blonde man from dinner rushing toward me.
“What is it?”
Alex doubled over for a minute to catch his breath, and looked up at me with a charming grin.
“Why don’t you come here for a second? I’ve got something for you.”
I was surprised and confused, and unsure of whether or not I could trust this man. Still, something about him compelled me to follow him down the hall. He unlocked the door of his room easily, apparently ease would come with time with these old-fashioned doors, and led me inside.
“Here,” he said, opening his closet. “We look about the same size. Pick a few things to wear. We can get your jeans laundered and head to town tomorrow if you’d like. Maybe pick out something new for you to last your stay.”
I was shocked by the open display of generosity.
“I couldn’t,” I said, trying to back out of the room. “Thank you so much for the offer, but…”
“Look,” Alex said, closing the door to the room before I had a chance to escape. “Miss Abby is a proper kind of woman. She’d have my hide if I didn’t offer. And besides, I don’t mind helping out. It’s not long ago I was in your shoes.”
“Alex, really. I would rather not.”
I seriously doubted anybody here had ever been in my shoes, and struggled to find a polite way to refuse his offer. It would be nice to get out of the clothes that still reeked of muddy downtown New Orleans. Nicer than I could imagine. But I was an alpha. Taking from others was not a role I liked to play.
“Decker, man, come on. It’s really no problem. We can go to town tomorrow. I know a guy who needs some handiwork done and you can get a job to keep yourself occupied for a while. You can pay me back then.”
“Well I have some money now,” I said, reaching into my back pocket and fishing for my wallet. “I’ll pay you to borrow a couple of outfits.”
“You’re gonna need your money right now,” Alex said, his blue eye darkening sternly. “Don’t go turning down genuine generosity when it comes your way.”
I knew he was right, and sighed heavily.
“Really. I just want to be friendly. You don’t have to make it a power thing.”
I was surprised by the observation, and studied Alex. He was looking firmly at me, his handsome face creased. He seemed genuinely worried about me. But how could he be? He hardly knew a thing about me.
“Fine,” I said. “But I’ll pay you back somehow.”
“Pay me back by coming to breakfast looking proper,” Alex said with a grin. “Make Eustis put his foot in his mouth. He’s an asshole, I’d love to see it.”
I grinned.
“He reminds me of someone from where I used to live,” I said, making my way to Alex’s closet. I picked out a couple of outfits, feeling lowly the whole time.
“Sorry to hear that,” Alex said with a laugh. He went to a dresser on the far side of the room and rummaged through it. He came back to me holding a pair of pajama pants and a soft white t-shirt. “Why don’t you go get some rest now? Working for Paul can be a bit grueling. You’ll need your energy.”
“Thanks,” I said, surprised by how easy it was becoming for me to talk to Alex. He was very laid back, and I couldn’t get over the depth of his blue eyes. He seemed nothing like Jake. Actually, he was the kind of guy Jake would tease mercilessly. As far as Jake was concerned, there was no excuse to show weakness. And kindness, in his eyes, was a weakness.
“It’s no problem,” Alex said. “See you in the morning.”
He grinned, and I noticed he had a dimple on his left cheek. Why was he so attractive? I was probably just vulnerable after being betrayed by my first love.
Alex closed the door behind me with a soft click and I made my way back to my bedroom. It would be nicer than I could imagine to get these clothes off.
“Decker!”
Alex’s voice startled me from down the hallway. “I forgot to tell you. There’s a laundry chute in the bathroom of your room; throw it down there and someone will throw your clothes in the wash and return them to you.”
“Oh, okay. Thanks.”
Alex grinned at me and then disappeared.
Chapter 7
“Rise and shine, Mr. Decker!”
Penelope’s voice was followed by loud banging. I groaned and looked at the clock. It was 6:00 in the morning. I sighed loudly. I had hardly gotten any sleep. I was haunted by the memory of Jake’s betrayal, and hadn’t been able to get the sickening image of him hanging all over Walker out of my head.
“Breakfast is on the table, get it while it’s hot.”
I sat up feeling like death itself. At least this time I wouldn’t have to go downstairs and face everybody in the same filthy outfit. Alex really had made the night before go by a lot easier. I don’t know what I would have done if I had been forced to keep the clothes that I had been shamed in in my bedroom all night. The scent of Jake and Walker lingering on my clothes would have driven me insane.
“Morning, Decker,” Miss Abby said in her deep southern lilt. She smiled at me. I stared at her, questions welling in my head. Before I had a chance to ask anything else though, the dining room was bustling with activity. “Good mornin’ everyone!”
Everybody mumbled a greeting to Miss Abby and arranged themselves around the table.
“Eustis, I believe you had something you wanted to say to this young man,” Miss Abby said, her voice genial but her eyes staring sternly at him. Eustis looked sheepishly down at the table and then cleared his throat.
“Sorry, Mr. Decker.”
His face was red, and I almost laughed. I could see who the alpha was around here.
“You didn’t know,” I said. “It is rude to come to a meal so filthy.”
Soft chuckles filled the room, and Miss Abby cleared her throat.
“Thank you, Eustis. Now, let’s get this day started proper.”
The seating arrangement was the same as it had been the night before, and I snuck a glance at Alex. He returned my look, a shy smile creasing his face. I couldn’t help but fight the warmth that flooded my chest. He seemed like such a sweet person. It was a nice change. Jake was always putting me, and everybody else, down. Then he would get mad and tell us not to get bent out of shape if he went too far. How could I not have seen that he and Walker were more suited for each other all along?
“So what are your plans, Mr. Decker?” the elderly man with round spectacles asked. “How long do you think you’ll be staying?”
“I’m not sure, sir,” I said. I wished everybody would stop asking me about the future. I had barely gotten out of the worst day of my life so far.
“Call me Mr. Lewis. This is my wife, Mrs. Lewis.”
“Nice to meet you, sir. Ma’am.”
Mrs. Lewis nodded in acknowledgement and went back to her meal.
“As I was saying,” Mr. Lewis continued. “About your plans.”
“Leave the boy alone,” the heavy man said. I felt a surge of relief.
“That’s enough, gentlemen,” Miss Abby said. “Roger, I appreciate your concern for Mr. Decker. And Mr. Lewis, please do us all a favor and mind your business.”
Mr. Lewis nodded graciously, and everybody got back to eating. I was relieved to find that breakfast was a lot more comfortable than supper had been. I was beginning to enjoy listening to the banter. They all had their own sense of humor, and it was nice to be around so much activity. It kept my mind off of the mutiny. But only a bit. It was still lurking behind my every thought. I was surprised the darkness inside of me wasn’t rolling off in waves.
“Hey Decker, are you ready to get going?” Alex asked.
“Oh, sure.”
I had almost forgotten that Alex had offered to take me out. I could barely hold my head up long enough to comprehend what was happening. Jake and Walker had really taken a toll on me. I wished I could feel anything but this depressing blackness. Anger, rage…something powerful. Not this vulnerable, weak depression. It wasn’t in my nature. Or at least, it shouldn’t be. Maybe I really wasn’t cut out to be an alpha after all.
“How did you sleep?” Alex asked as we strolled to the dirt lot where several beat up cars and trucks were parked. He led me to a light blue truck and got inside.
“I kind of didn’t,” I sighed, ducking into the passenger’s seat.
“I had a feeling,” Alex said. “We don’t have to go see Paul today. Like I said, he works us hard.”
I glanced at Alex, who was wearing a black t-shirt. It was tight around his muscular biceps. I could definitely tell that he was a hard worker. If I wasn’t so depressed I might have been attracted to him.
“I’m fine,” I assured him. I held his gaze a little longer than I meant to, and he averted my eyes and focused on the road ahead of us.
“All right, man,” he said. “It’s your call.”
“No, let’s go.”
I was firm, and Alex smiled; a tiny gesture that electrified me. I was immediately repulsed by myself though. There was no way I was ready to move on. Jake had been everything to me.
“All right,” Alex said, his soft voice breaking into my thoughts. “Let’s go.”
Chapter 8
We were quiet until Alex pulled into a long dirt driveway. We were heading even deeper into the marshes, into a property that was almost so far out of town that it might as well have been its own island. Alex parked and got out.
“Paul!”
A huge, brawny man with dark brown eyes and a bald head appeared from behind the dingy shack where I was sure he lived.
“What?”
“I brought someone I’d like you to meet.”
“I’ll be damned,” Paul said, bounding toward us with impressive speed. “You look just like Krane!”
I proffered my hand. “He was my father.”
“Aw man, Alex. You should have given me more notice than this, man!” Paul reached out and seized my shoulders, pulling me into a strong hug. I could tell he meant no harm, but it was still off-putting.
“All right, big guy,” I said, pulling away and patting his broad chest. “That’s enough.”
“Sorry, man. It’s just I last saw you when you were like 3 years old. Used to come out here with your folks all the time.”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t remember much of that. Just scents sometimes…little memories.”
“I understand. So you here just to say hey, or…?”
“I thought maybe you could put us to work for a while,” Alex said, glancing at me. He could probably tell I was uncomfortable. “Miss Abby’s putting him up like she did for me.”
“Ah, tough break,” Paul said, shaking his head. I thought it was odd. Everyone acted like they knew exactly what was going on with me. But how could they? My mother had always told me that my father lived in the Bayou because it was a normal place full of normal people. But I was beginning to get a feeling that there was more to it than that.
“What do you think?” Alex asked.
“Of course! Anything for Krane’s kid, man. I mean, you’re awesome too, Alex, your mom was just…she was a classy lady. But Krane was like a brother to me. Hey man, I’m sorry about what happened to your dad. That was unbelievable.”
“Thanks,” I said, avoiding his gaze. It was strange to talk about my dad. I had never brought him up to anybody but my mom. Most people would never understand the complexities of losing a parent to another bear shifter, let alone both parents. Although they were separated, they had both been casualties of misplaced aggression. Shifting was dangerous, especially around people who weren’t part of your own pack. It was immediately registered as a threat, and caused many needless fights and even more needless deaths.
My parents had always been of the mindset that a person should be able to shift whenever and wherever they wanted. At first, that was why they had gone to the Bayou so often. They felt like the rich foliage was a great cover for them so they could be themselves without anybody else watching. Unfortunately they weren’t very compatible.
“So what kind of work do you do here?” I asked, anxious to change the subject. It was still hard for me to think about my parents. Although I had been raised to be independent, the wounds that were left from losing them prematurely were always going to be painful.
“Gotta be honest, man, it’s tough stuff. Right now we’re putting a new roof on Ol’ Lady Allestar’s place. After that we have a lot of projects lined up.”
“So construction?”
“Right,” Paul said grinning. “But we work fast. If you don’t keep up, you might as well stay in bed.”
“Got it,” I said. I was exhausted, but I was getting the feeling that spending time with these men was going to be just what I needed. It was time to get to work.
Chapter 9
Paul led us to the area behind the shack where he had been working before we arrived. He was filling a wheelbarrow full of shingles, and had a tool box sitting beside it.
“One of you, grab that toolbox,” Paul said, hoisting the wheelbarrow up. “The other one, go in the shed over there and grab the ladder.”
I was closer to the shed so I ducked inside. It was dark and musty, and the smell stirred something within me. I was suddenly sure I once referred to Paul as my uncle, and felt a wave of grief wash over me.
“So,” Paul said casually as we made our way to Old Lady Allestar’s place, “You do a lot of shifting anymore?”
I looked from Paul to Alex in shock. What a thing to say out in the open! Even if he had known about my father, he had no right outing me in front of Alex. What was he going to think?
“It’s all right, kid!” Paul said, his eyes twinkling. “You’re not alone here.”
“You’re not,” Alex said, removing an amulet from his neck and looking steadily into my eyes. I suddenly caught a strong whiff of bear shifter. I was shocked, and more than that I felt unbelievably stupid. I had been so wrapped up in my own drama and sadness that I had completely missed the fact that this town was crawling with others like myself. I had been worrying about nothing.
“That’s right,” Paul agreed. He also removed an amulet, and my senses were overwhelmed by the scent of two black bear shifters. But something was strange about them. It was clear that they weren’t from the same pack.
“Wait,” I said, pausing mid-step. “What’s going on here?”
Paul sighed heavily, dropping the wheelbarrow and massaging his bald head for a moment. Finally he looked at me and grinned.
“We’re the outcasts.”
Alex pursed his lips, looking down at the ground. Apparently he was still sore about the subject. I felt a strong pang of sympathy for him. Alex looked anguished when his gentle features were drawn in like that.
“You mean…?”
“That’s right, boy. We’re just too hot for the world to handle. So we made this place for ourselves. And other people like you. And you know the weirdest part? It works. Lost and lonesome shifters who have lost everything stumble upon this place like magic. No rhyme or reason. Just follow their instincts and show up in the one place in the world they can be accepted.”
It was hard to take all of this in at once. Did that mean my father had been an outcast?
“Seems you got bit by the bad luck bug,” Paul said pleasantly, lifting his wheelbarrow again and urging us along.
“Something like that,” I muttered.
“Well, I’m not going to ask you what happened. You’re entitled to your privacy. It’s kind of against the code here to go prying into other people’s past.”
That was a relief. “Thanks.”
Paul didn’t acknowledge my gratitude. Instead, he bellowed, “Here we are!”
My heart sank as I looked upon a dilapidated little house that, if it had been within city limits, would have been condemned long ago. A feeble woman was slowly making her way outside, squinting at us from her porch.
“That you, Paulie?”
“That’s right, ma’am. And company. Krane’s boy is here.”
The old woman paused for a moment, her face slacking in disbelief. “You don’t mean lil’ Decker?”
“That’s right, ma’am.”
To my surprise, the old woman started crying.
“Well you folks come on in,” she said, turning toward the doorway without bothering to wipe her tears. “I reckon we have some visiting to do.”
Chapter 10
If I thought the little town was antiquated, it was nothing compared to Ol’ Lady Allestar’s place. Going through her doorway was like walking into another century. Alex glanced at me.
“You okay?” he whispered.
“Yeah,” I said. But the truth was, I was shaken. All these people who knew me, or really, who had known my father. Were all of them rogue bear shifters? I had never even dreamed a place like this was possible.
“Sit down boys,” the old woman said. She sank down in a big armchair, and up close I saw that her body was seized with tremors.
“I’m gonna bring out some lemonade,” Paul said, disappearing from the room. “Mrs. Allestar here makes the best in the world.”
“What did those bastards do to you, boy?”
The old woman looked hard at me, and I was shocked by how she cut to the chase. “You aren’t hurt, are you?”
I was hurt. More hurt than anyone could imagine. But she surely meant physical wounds. I had managed to get out in time.
“No, ma’am.”
The old woman’s lips creased into a smile. “Polite boy. Miriam did right by you.”
I frowned and looked down at my hands. My mother had refused to take me to see my father for so many years. And when he did come by, it was in the dead of night, when she could hardly refuse him without making a scene. I had taken to sleeping less and less to make sure I wouldn’t miss him.
“How is Miriam?”
Another dagger twisted in my heart. “Dead.”
“Oh,” the old woman said, more to herself than to me. “I’m sorry.”
I shrugged. No matter how sorry anybody was, it wouldn’t bring my parents back.
“You have a home here, boy,” the old woman said, looking hard at me. “But don’t let that make you complacent. You were born to lead. Don’t you dare give up after one setback. You know where you belong.”
Alex looked from the old woman and back to me inquisitively. Our conversation must have been quite a sight.
“Lemonade!”
The dire look left her face and Mrs. Allestar smiled sweetly. “Thank you, dear boy.”
Paul beamed and sat a tray down on the coffee table in front of us. He hadn’t been exaggerating; it was the best lemonade I had ever had, and stirred another memory from deep within me.
“All right,” Paul said once all our glasses were empty. “Let’s get started.”
Chapter 11
Work went by with surprising speed, and Paul decided to treat us to drinks at the tavern once the roof was finished.
“Did you see Ol’ Lady Allestar’s face when we left?” Paul asked. He seemed delighted by the old woman, and it was no wonder. She treated him like a favored son.
“She was really happy that she won’t have to fish out buckets to catch water anymore,” Alex agreed, smiling broadly.
Although it felt nice to do a good deed, I just couldn’t summon up the ability to smile. The old woman had unlocked questions and memories I would just as soon forget. On top of everything that had happened with Jake the day before, I just couldn’t seem to find any reason to smile.
We drank late into the night, and Paul left first.
“Have some work to do in the mornin’,” he told us apologetically. I was honestly a little relieved to see him go. I was tempted to ask him all he could tell me about my father’s life in the Bayou.
Once we were alone, Alex and I sat at a quiet booth together. He was across from me, and I had a chance to really take him in for the first time. His face was strong, and had a dependable quality that made him seem instantly likeable. His hair was short, and he had a strong neck and broad shoulders. He was strong, and, more compelling, he was a bear shifter.
“Hey, listen,” Alex said, sipping on his beer. “I know Paul said it’s frowned upon to ask people what their stories are. But if you ever want to talk about it…I’m here. I won’t judge you.”
I was surprised by the offer, but more surprised by how quickly after it was given that I felt compelled to spill my guts.
“Thanks,” I said quietly, fighting back the urge to do so. I wasn’t sure how many people in town were shifters, but I was beginning to notice more and more of the mysterious amulets that seemed to disguise the bear’s scent.
“It’s getting late,” Alex said, glancing at his watch. “I think we should head back now. Miss Abby’ll have a fit if we’re out too late. She doesn’t like us coming and going at all hours.”
“What’s it matter to her?” I asked. “We pay to live there, she’s not our mother.”
Alex’s eyes widened. “Well she worries, Decker. It’s not particularly safe hereabouts. There are lots of rogue shifters who wanna take all their anger out on anyone they can find. Lost many a good man that way.”
I mulled this over as Alex led me through the dirt streets, back toward the boarding house. We were both too drunk to drive, and clumsily made it up the long row of steps at the house when we got back.
“C’mon,” Alex said, turning the corner of the porch instead of heading inside.
I followed him, and was surprised to find that there was a whole back porch linked to the front; this one with a porch swing on it.
“Sit with me,” Alex said, plopping heavily into the porch swing.
“All right,” I said reluctantly, sitting down on the edge of the seat beside him. “What’s on your mind?”
“Oh, I’m just not ready to go in yet,” Alex said, smiling at me. I couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or if his eyes lingered on me a little too long. I felt a little forbidden thrill course through me, but quickly fought it away. There was no way I could be thinking about sex right now. Not after what had happened with Jake. He was the only man who I had ever let touch me.
“All right.”
We were quiet for a moment before Alex began to speak again.
“I came here a year ago,” he said, looking off into the distance. Our view from the back porch was actually really beautiful. The porch looked over an overgrown garden and a deep marsh. The sound of bullfrogs and cicadas in the night was actually really comforting. I expected there to be mosquitoes, but for some reason they seemed to leave this place alone.
“I never thought I’d leave my home,” Alex continued. “I wouldn’t be here if I had a choice.”
I almost asked what happened, but remembered that it wasn’t polite. Thankfully, Alex answered my unasked questions. There was something so remarkably transparent about him. It was nothing like Jake, who was dark and secretive. I had a feeling Alex would have none of the possessive and competitive qualities that Jake had.
“I’m the omega in our pack,” Alex said. “Or I was. I don’t have a pack anymore, not really. We’re all just a quilt work of rebels out here. That’s why we wear the amulets. We don’t want anyone from our former packs to find this place we have in the Bayou. It’s our refuge. Our only home now. But god I miss the city.”
“What city?” I asked.
“Las Vegas,” Alex said. I was surprised. I guess I had assumed only flashy types were from Las Vegas. Alex seemed anything but flashy.
“Wow,” I said. “That’s far.”
Alex grinned. “I was alone a long while before I found this place. But as soon as Miss Abby saw me, she gave me this amulet and set me up a room. I don’t plan on staying. I want to settle into a city somewhere. I just haven’t had a chance to save very much.”
“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a city boy,” I said with a small laugh. “Least of all Los Vegas.”
“It’s not like I was raised inner city,” Alex said, raising an eyebrow at me. “I just really like the hustle and bustle of it all. It’s just too quiet for me here. I feel like I’m just too alone. Alone with my thoughts…even alone with everyone else around here. It’s a fishbowl, you know. Only the same people to talk to and watch every single day of my life.”
“Hm,” I said, mulling this over.
“Not that I’m not grateful!” Alex said quickly. “I love everything they’ve done for me here. I’d never be able to repay them. But this just isn’t my end game, you know?”
I knew. I had been thinking the same thing myself. I nodded and Alex seemed to relax.
“I don’t know if I can stay here long-term either,” I said, looking down at the pants that Alex had lent me. They were surprisingly comfortable, though I was a little bit taller than he was, so his shirt occasionally bared my navel.
“I reckon that’s why we’re both here at the boarding house,” Alex said with a laugh.
I smirked. “I reckon.”
We fell into a comfortable silence for a few minutes, but it was soon interrupted by Alex jumping up from the porch swing, leaving me swinging wildly for a moment. “Fireflies!”
I furrowed my eyebrows and peered out over the marsh, and my drunk mind became just as captivated by nature’s light show as Alex was.
“Come on,” he said, jumping off the porch. “Let’s go look closer.”
I glanced back at the big house, knowing I didn’t want to face the rest of the night inside alone.
“All right,” I said, following on Alex’s tail.
He was surprisingly fast, and it took a little more effort than I thought it would to keep up. He stopped suddenly on the edge of the marsh. Unfortunately, I was a little too drunk to stop and skidded into him.
Alex fell forward with a laugh.
“Whoa!” he exclaimed with a huge splash. I scrambled into the water to help him out, but he stood up on his own and grinned. “You just wanted to see me wet, didn’t you?”
I was dumbfounded, but he laughed again, a pleasant, pure sound that was a nice change from Jake’s malicious cackle. I stared at Alex, unable to figure out if he had pegged my sexual orientation or if he was just being playful.
Alex swept his arm across the water as I was working the question in my head like a puzzle, and soon, my whole torso was drenched.
“Gotcha!” he exclaimed triumphantly. He doubled over laughing again, his shirt soaking wet and clinging to his muscular chest. He looked so brilliant in the moonlight, his smooth, clear features so easy to understand. He didn’t seem the type to hide a thing in the world.
An unexpected growl started in my throat, and Alex froze, looking at me in fear. I would have been able to hold myself back if I was sober, but I guess in most situations, I did what I wanted anyway. I was an alpha, after all. Even if I had made a mistake by letting a parasite like Jake get too close to me.
“Whoa!” Alex exclaimed again. This time though, it was because I had sprung forward, tackling him into the water. The fear and confusion in his eyes only seemed to fuel me more, and without any ceremony about it, I kissed him hard on the lips.
He resisted for a moment, but soon I felt him grow still under the heat of my body, and his soft, warm lips began to tug eagerly at mine. I stood up and dragged him out of the marsh by his shirt. He followed willingly, stumbling and falling on top of me. His handsome face lit up with a smile, and for a brief moment I was completely transfixed.
Alex seized my lips again, and soon we were rolling in the damp grass, Alex laughing quietly. I struggled to remove his shirt, but with his back pinned to the ground and my motor skills impaired by alcohol, it was difficult. He sat up and stripped the shirt off himself, and I was awe-struck by his unbelievable torso. It was more than I could have asked for; nothing like Jake’s lean, scrawny muscles and beer gut. Alex was solid.
“Your turn,” he said, hoisting my shirt over my head. I was about to protest, the memory of Jake throwing me off my game, but instead I stifled a moan when Alex’s hand found its way inside my jeans.
A surge of bliss made my knees weak. I hadn’t wanted anything to do with sex because of Jake, but right now I felt spiteful and bitter. What did it matter what I did with this stranger? I didn’t owe anything to our joke of a relationship! Whether I thought I was emotionally ready or not, it was happening. And it felt fucking good. Screw Jake.
I shoved Alex against the grass, violently tearing his pants and boxers off. I was impressed by the size of his cock; it was long and thick, and felt perfect against my skin. I could see Alex’s abdominal muscles rippling as he breathed heavily, trying to bite back grunts of pleasure as I began working his shaft in my hands.
He began to rock his hips against me, and I couldn’t resist tugging him gently until I was gratified by the sound of his voice.
“Fuck,” Alex whispered, his shaft growing thick in my hand.
His clear eyes bore into mine, and I was captivated by him as he received my touch. Alex’s every slight movement set me ablaze. I was frustrated so much by what had happened with Jake. All I wanted to do was find a way to get back in control of my life.
Alex grunted when my aggression reared its head, and I flipped him roughly to his hands and knees. I knelt behind him, wasting no time before shoving myself inside of him. Alex yelped, and I wasn’t sure whether it was pleasure or pain that he was feeling. In the heat of the moment, I hardly cared. All I wanted to do was feel myself again. To feel like an alpha.
I reached around and gripped his cock to keep it from dangling in the air as I used his body for my gratification. He moaned then, and electricity shot through my loins. It was warm inside him. Jake had rarely let me express myself like this in the bedroom. He thought it was novel that he could top the alpha. But with Alex I felt a shocking need to assert myself. To let him know who was really in control here.
To my surprise, Alex seemed to be loving every second of it. Jake would have fought his way from under me by now. He would have tried to do something to make me submit and serve him. But Alex glanced back at me and we stared at each other, sparks shooting from his eyes to mine. He was challenging me. He wanted me to give him everything I had.
I hissed in pleasure as my cock swelled inside him. I had been drunkenly operating at half-mast until then, but now I wanted him to know that he had no choice in the matter. He was mine.
Alex moaned when I squeezed his shaft, running my hand along the thick cylinder of his cock and down to its round, weeping head. Heat pulsed through my loins and I could feel his body tight around me. Every slight movement was electrifying.
I had never dreamed of feeling this good with Jake. Our relationship had mostly focused on Jake being pleasured by me and using my body as he liked. It hadn’t felt particularly satisfying, but I had loved him so much that his immaturity in the bedroom had seemed like part of his charm. Now, though, I knew the truth. He had suppressed my alpha ways intentionally. He had always been after more power. Who knew how long he’d been plotting this mutiny?
Alex grew limp against the grass, bracing himself with his knees dug deep in the dirt and his arms extended outward. He was breathing heavily, and my eyes roamed the muscular curves of his back, illuminated to perfection by the moonlight. What had taken me so long to really embrace this side of myself?
My desire to dominate Alex began to grow in intensity the more he seemed to submit to my power. He was groaning in pleasure with every thunderous thrust of my hips, and I could feel a hot tingle beginning to build up low in my abdomen.
When I knew I couldn’t hold back any longer, I gripped Alex’s shaft hard and began pumping my hand around it. He writhed in pleasure and struggled against me. I held him still and rammed my hips against him until he was gasping my name.
We erupted together at the same time. I threw my head back in rapture as I emptied myself inside of Alex. I could feel the hot liquid bursting from the pit of his loins. The feeling of his cock tense in my hand enhanced the power of my climax, and soon we were panting on the ground together.
“Well,” Alex said, finally sitting up and pulling his boxers back on. He cast a sidelong look at me. “Are you okay?”
I was surprised by the question. Jake never would have bothered asking. He would have gone off to do his own thing by now.
“Fine,” I said.
“Cool. Then I’ll pick you up for work in the morning.”
Alex grabbed his wet clothes and headed toward the boarding house. My eyes followed him until he disappeared safely inside.
Chapter 12
I tossed and turned that night, my mind flooded by horrible memories of my time with Jake. I couldn’t believe I had already allowed myself to be sexual with another person. Even though I knew Jake had done so long ago; I had to be honest with myself, it seemed way too soon.
And the worst part was that I had basically just used Alex for my own means. He wasn’t exactly my top priority when I had been using his body for my gratification. He was a second thought. I might as well have done to him what Jake had always done to me. I felt terrible. How was I going to face him again?
Eventually, the alcohol took over and I was pulled into a dark oblivion. I was torn out of it far too soon by urgent rapping on my door.
“Breakfast, Mr. Decker,” Penelope said. I groaned and rolled out of bed. I was used to my routine with Jake, where we did as we pleased and stayed in bed late. He was happy to live on my inheritance, and I hadn’t thought anything of it. I just felt good to be able to take care of the man I loved. It was the alpha in me. And I was growing more convinced that Jake had known exactly how to take advantage of that.
“Coming,” I mumbled, dragging myself out of bed.
“About time, Mr. Decker,” Miss Abby said, raising an eyebrow at me.
I was hungover and tired, and slumped down at the table without acknowledging her. I was beginning to hate that my seat was permanently beside Alex, and did my best to avoid his eye.
“I have something I want to give you before you leave today,” Miss Abby said, unfazed by my mood.
“Yes, ma’am,” I said.
Everybody was quiet during breakfast, and I retreated from the dining room as soon as I could. I could hardly stomach the smell of food, let alone keep it down. Everything felt heavy in my stomach, and I was hoping to avoid Alex.
“Decker,” Miss Abby said, “Come here and put this on for me, please.”
Miss Abby was holding out an amulet, just like the one that Alex wore.
“If you put this on, it will reduce your danger while you’re staying in the Bayou,” she said. “It conceals your scent and helps you to avoid ambushes.”
I took the amulet and frowned at it. I was proud of my scent. I was an alpha. It was kind of criminal to go into hiding like that. It really solidified the fact that now, I was an outcast. Did she think I couldn’t take care of myself?
“I can guess what you must be thinking right now,” Miss Abby said. “But it’s your choice whether to wear it or not. It keeps other shifters from picking fights and making trouble that doesn’t have to be made. You do what’s right for you, Decker. I know your father would have refused to wear it. It’s completely up to you.”
“Thank you,” I mumbled, stuffing the amulet in my pocket.
“Hey Decker,” Alex said, striding out of the dining room. Somehow, despite our late night, he was looking as bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as ever. “You ready to go?”
“Nah, man,” I said, turning my back on him and heading up the stairs. “I’m going back to bed.”
I could sense that he wanted to push the subject, but the last thing I needed was to spend a horribly awkward day with Alex. Our fling hadn’t meant anything to me, and I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea. I had given in to temptation, but that didn’t mean that we had any possibility of getting any closer.
I waited in my room until I was sure Alex had left, and then went back to bed until lunch time. Alex wasn’t there for lunch, and everybody chatted pleasantly. They had learned I wasn’t the talkative type and left me out of most meal conversations. Especially after Miss Abby had warned them about asking me invasive questions.
“Have you given the amulet any thought, Decker?”
I turned around, surprised to see Mrs. Lewis.
“No, ma’am,” I said. Mrs. Lewis was normally as silent as I was during meals, so I hadn’t recognized her voice at all. She was soft-spoken, and although she didn’t look like she had a mean bone in her body, from her gaze I could tell that she was the type to hold her own.
“Well, I’d like you to consider it,” she said, gesturing for me to follow her out onto the porch. She sat carefully on the stoop. I stood across from her and she took a deep breath. “My boy was killed a while back. He didn’t want anything to do with the amulets. We’d been forced out of our pack. They didn’t like having a woman as an alpha.”
So that explained her serious attitude. I had never considered that a female could be an alpha, but I shouldn’t have been surprised.
“What happened to your son?” I asked, trying to hide my surprise.
“He thought he could handle himself out here. Called this place the boonies. We were from a city far out yonder, and he liked to think that he was a big shot because he was the son of an alpha. I am partly to blame for that; he was raised with a soft hand.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being confident.”
“Oh honey,” Mrs. Lewis said, a wry grin creasing her face. “There’s a fine line between being confident and stupid, and my boy Rodney walked it.”
“I’m sorry about your loss,” I said, unsure of what else to say about it.
“So am I,” Mrs. Lewis said, her eye clouding over. “I’m sure you’re wondering how it happened.”
I nodded, relieved that I wouldn’t have to wonder or pry to find out.
“He refused Miss Abby’s amulet, then went out into the forest alone. I hear it’s something like what happened to your pap. He came across some rough characters looking for someone to rough up. There’s nothing more rowdy than a shifter with nothing left to lose.”
“I understand,” I said. And in a way, I could relate to that, too. I had been a complete pig with Alex, taking what I wanted without any consideration for him at all. He had seemed okay with it, but he shouldn’t be all right being dominated by someone who was feeling as rough and uncaring as I was. He deserved better than that, and if I couldn’t even keep a jerk like Jake happy, there was no way I would be able to give a guy like Alex the treatment he deserved.
“There’s a lot of folks around here who think a lot of you. Do what you can to take care how you handle things. No matter what happened between you and your pack back home, you know who you are. You know where you belong. And you know what? You follow your own destiny. I have something in mind, myself. You think I’m just going to sit back and accept being ousted from my own pack? They’ve got another thing coming, they do…”
Mrs. Lewis looked into the distance and grew quiet. I could tell she was done talking, so I retreated politely from the porch and left her to her own thoughts.
Chapter 13
I clutched the amulet as I wandered down the dirt roads of the Bayou. I had a strong urge to hop on my bike and get the hell out of there. I wanted to face Jake and Walker once and for all. The longer I was away, the more angry I became. Every little thing Jake had ever done wrong was beginning to return to me, until my head was muddied with righteous fury.
It was strange to be walking around without Alex or Paul with me, but in a way I liked it more. It had been a while since I had been on my own. Not long after my mother had died and I had moved out on my own, Jake had latched on to me and spent more and more time at my house. He was probably still living there now.
The thought filled me with rage. He had never paid bills or done anything around the house. Jake had relied on me since we were teenagers, and used me until he found a way to keep the advantages I provided him without having to be with me anymore. Who knew how long he had been hoping to get rid of me?
The settlement was modest, but surprisingly expansive. It was strange to think that everybody here had a story of some kind, uprooted from the home they loved and forced to relocate like I had been. It was nice that they all had somewhere to go, but I didn’t quite believe I would ever have anywhere that I felt like I belonged.
I shoved the amulet in my pocket and sighed. What had I been thinking, coming here like this? I needed to go find my motorcycle and get the hell out of here. I would face Jake and Walker head-on and reclaim my place as the alpha in the pack.
I reached the outskirts of town, trying to remember the direction of the area where I had left my motorcycle. I decided to follow my nose.
To my fury, it was gone from where I left it, and a trail of malice was left in its wake. I could tell someone else had gotten their hands on my bike, and it wasn’t just anyone. It was a pair of shifters with a sour scent. That was all I needed.
I bounded off into the forest without a second thought, anger prickling in my breast. Whoever thought they could get away with touching my motorcycle and live was going to have another thing coming.
“Hey, new guy,” a voice suddenly growled. It was coming from my right, and just when I whipped around to face it, I was hit from both sides.
I fell to the ground, furious. How many times was I going to feel helpless? Maybe I really wasn’t meant to be an alpha.
“Bet this little beauty belongs to you,” a tall, burly man sneered. His eyes were unkind; they reminded me of Jake. The other man on the other side of me laughed as the one who spoke stroked my bike with a mocking smile.
“Get your dirty hands off that,” I growled, lunging at him from the ground. I managed to strike a punch, and could feel my hackles raising. If I shifted, there would be no survivors.
“Down, boy,” a third man said, emerging from out of nowhere. Why hadn’t I been able to sense them coming?
A surge of pain brought me back to the ground. I scowled, sizing them up from the ground. They weren’t alphas, but they were strong and vicious. Mrs. Lewis had been right about the power in having nothing to lose. But not right enough that I had that power on my side.
“Nice bike,” the third man said with a sickening grin. “What year is it?”
“None of your fucking business what year it is.”
All of us were surprised to hear Alex’s voice. I looked over my shoulder just in time to see Alex bare his teeth. Thick, light brown fur began to sprout all over his body and he pounced on the man closest to him. Everybody was surprised enough that I was able to scramble to my feet and punch the man who had punched me first, right in the face.
He fell backwards and blood covered his face. As he fell, I realized that he, and all of the other men for that matter, were wearing one of Miss Abby’s amulets.
“Do you know these guys?” I shouted to Alex.
But Alex wasn’t able to answer me anymore. He was completely finished with his shifting and was laying into his victim. I took the opportunity to fight off the second man, dodging his blow and grabbing his arm and cracking it over my shoulder. It was a nice self-defense move my mother had taught me when I was just a child. When applied with my power, a sickening crack echoed in the air and the man dropped to the ground screaming.
“Let me help you with that,” I growled, kicking him in the face. He flew back to the ground and the shrieking stopped. He was unconscious.
Alex stopped what he was doing and looked at me inquisitively, taking a break from mauling the man trapped between his paws.
“You don’t feel pain if you’re unconscious,” I said with a shrug.
Alex blinked and then looked back at the man he had pinned on the ground. The guy was sobbing, trying hard to shift, but he was already too weak to manage it.
“Let’s get out of here,” I said.
Alex seemed reluctant to let go of his prey, but I looked him hard in the eye. “I said let’s go!”
Chapter 14
Alex let the man fall to the ground, and I grabbed the handlebars of my motorcycle. I rolled it away from the group of men writhing and passed out on the ground, humiliated and angry that I had allowed myself to be ambushed.
I could hear the heavy footfalls of Alex in his powerful bear form. They gradually became lighter, and I realized he was shifting back into his human form.
“Are you all right, Decker?” Alex asked. “I guess nobody told you how dangerous it can be out here.”
I prickled. Maybe I had been hoping to run into a fight.
“Just leave me alone, Alex,” I said. I was in no mood to talk to anybody. In fact, of all the people I could be talking to, Alex was the last man I wanted to see.
“I get that it’s hard, you know. I don’t know what you’ve been through, but –“
I whipped around, my fury reaching a new height.
“That’s right, Alex. You don’t know what I’ve been through. So just drop it!”
Alex didn’t seem the least bit hurt by the outburst, and I could feel the heat creeping to my cheeks. Alex was completely naked after shifting back to his human form. It had been so long since I had seen another man shift that I had forgotten how surprising it could be to suddenly be encountered with someone after a shift. I had only been a teenager
The energy surrounding Alex was wild and pure as it concentrated itself back into his body. I was torn between being irritated and impressed with how Alex refused to hide his essence from me. It was daring, in a way, and I wasn’t sure how it made me feel. I was agitated overall, but the bold look in Alex’s eyes made me take a pause.
He didn’t speak again, nor did he try to hide his nudity from me. He clearly wasn’t hurt by my outburst. The look in his eyes seemed to tell me the opposite, as if he was satisfied knowing that I was being true to myself and my feelings.
“I just don’t want you to get the wrong idea about me,” I said. “I just got out of something serious. I mean…I thought it was serious.”
“Do you feel like talking about it?” Alex asked, striding along beside me. I did everything I could not to let my eyes wander across his perfect body.
“I don’t know,” I said with an exasperated sigh. If I didn’t talk about it, I would be thinking about it. Which was worse? They seemed equally bad.
“All right,” Alex said, stretching his arms up in the air and casting his beautiful, clear eyes to the sky. He sighed leisurely and continued walking quietly beside me.
“I was ambushed,” I finally said, looking down at my motorcycle. It was the only memento I had of my life in New Orleans with Jake. That and the change of clothes I had found folded neatly outside my bedroom the night before. “By the man I love…loved…more than anyone in the world.”
Alex let out a low whistle.
“People do fucked up things for power,” he said, looking down at the ground.
“I don’t see the appeal,” I grumbled.
“That’s probably because you have it,” Alex said. I glanced up at him and he winked at me.
I looked away quickly. “Well, you have no power. Not alpha power anyway. What’s to envy about it?”
Alex laughed softly, more to himself than to me. “I never said I envied power. The only thing I respect is honesty. You can’t pretend to be someone you’re not, or to covet the power that somebody else has.”
“Tell that to my ex,” I scoffed.
“He’ll get what he deserves in the end,” Alex said.
I looked up at him, shocked by the anger flashing in his storming eyes.
“I really don’t think it will happen,” I sighed. “I got ambushed twice in three days. And I couldn’t get myself out of either one of them. What kind of alpha am I?”
Alex grinned.
“You’re an alpha who thinks with your heart and misses subtle cues. That’s what the omega is for.”
“I’m not supposed to think with my heart. I have to lead with my instincts. And lately, they have been utter shit. Have you ever considered that I lost my place as alpha because I’m not meant to be the alpha?”
“Not for a second,” Alex said. “I think you’re alpha through and through.”
I resented his blind faith, but still, it was a brief comfort all the same.
“Whatever,” I sighed. “I’m done talking about it.”
“Do you want to know why I’m here?” Alex asked, a sly smile creeping across his face. Again, I was shocked by just how handsome this man was.
“I guess,” I said, though I was burning with curiosity.
“I’m here because I’m good at revenge.”
“What?” I asked. Alex was many things, but the thought that he was vengeful and conniving had never crossed my mind.
“My father was the rightful alpha, but his twin brother was power hungry. My father let him act as alpha just to keep the peace.”
“What did you do?” I asked, but I was already forming a picture in my mind. Alex, young, strong, and scorned, with his passion for honesty, feeling the injustice as if it were stabbing him in his own heart.
“Well, I was born sick, so I was raised as the omega. Nobody realized that there was a point when I started getting my strength back. And with strength came confidence. I fought my uncle. He almost died. Everybody, thinking he was the rightful alpha, thought I was a menace and banished me.”
“Why didn’t your parents stand up for you?” I asked, puzzled. It seemed like such a silly misunderstanding.
“They would have if they could have, but nobody wanted to believe that what they had believed so long was wrong and had caused my father to suffer. And my father’s closest relationship was to his twin, not to his sickly, violent son. They had other kids to raise. I’ve been on my own for a while now.”
I was baffled. Why did such horrible things happen? What was the true appeal of this alpha power?
“You don’t get it either, do you?” Alex asked, scoffing. “That’s because you’d never abuse that power to hurt others or to put yourself at an advantage. That’s what a real alpha is like. They care deeply about the greater good. They don’t seek power, it’s given to them because they have earned it. Because they would never take advantage of it. I know you have it in you, Decker. I haven’t known you that long, but there’s no doubt in my mind. Even if you have a few bumps in the road, you’re the true alpha.”
For the first time in what felt like centuries, I looked at the handsome, naked man standing beside me and smiled. Whether I believed Alex or not, it was nice not to feel worthless.
“Thanks,” I said.
Alex smiled, his eyes suddenly flashing with a dark energy that made the air between us crackle.
“Thank me later,” he said, letting his hand fall over the pronounced muscles of his abdomen. “There’s something else I’d like to do now.”
Chapter 15
I was irritated by my arousal; it wasn’t as if I was good company. I had no intention of falling in love with Alex. He was nice and everything, but I only got involved with people if I was serious about them. At least, that had always been my rule.
But look where that got me. I was entangled with a manipulative jerk who had only cared about my status and what I could do for him. I had lost everything to him. The worst part is that I had done it willingly. There was no way I was going to make the same mistake again. I wouldn’t let my guard down to anybody. Not even Alex.
But Alex didn’t seem to care whether I had my guard down or not. His eyes were boring into mine, as serious as I had ever seen anybody before. It was strange to see it; during work he had been mild, laid back, and goofy. He had an attractive personality, but I just couldn’t bring myself to feel what I thought I should feel about someone before I had sex with them.
What was it I wanted to feel? Some kind of life-long commitment?
My anguished thoughts were cut short by the feeling of Alex’s hands pressed against my shoulders.
“You’re holding back,” he said, frowning deeply at me. “I can feel it.”
I pulled away from him growling and continued on my way.
“You’re better than this, Decker!” Alex exclaimed. He had to sprint to catch up to me. “You’re strong because of the way you feel and nothing else. Don’t hide from who you are!”
He put his hand on my shoulder and tugged, as if to stop me from walking. My anger got the better of me then and I whipped around to face him, snarling. He flinched away, but he didn’t let go.
“That’s more like it,” he said. “If you’re angry, just be angry! If there’s something else you feel, just be it. It’s over faster that way.”
“I already told you that I want you to just leave me alone, Alex,” I growled. He was walking a thin line, and I was growing impatient.
“You’re not making this easy,” he said. “All I want you to do is fuck me. You don’t have to love me. You don’t have to replace your ex with your me or something. I get that you’re hurting and I don’t mind waiting until you’re ready. What I do mind is this shit you’re putting yourself through. You think I don’t know what you’re thinking? You’re denying yourself. And why?”
I glowered, but didn’t answer.
“You’re just down on yourself! You have no idea how impressive you are. You don’t think you’ve earned your place as an alpha. Am I right? Am I close?”
All I wanted was for Alex to shut the hell up. So what if I didn’t feel like an alpha? I wasn’t anymore. There was nothing that would convince me that I had earned that title. It had just been a mistake, that’s all. A mistake that was rectified by Jake and Walker. If I couldn’t hold my own against my own pack, what right did I have to call myself an alpha?
“Just stop talking!” I growled, whipping around to face Alex. He stared me down, and an infuriating satisfaction lit his eyes. Did he like pushing me to the point where I lost my temper? Didn’t he know it was dangerous to pick on somebody bigger than you were?
“Why should I, Decker? You’re going to lose yourself if you just hide from all of this. You were wronged, man! You were wronged and you didn’t deserve that. It doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to be an alpha!”
“Just STOP!”
I lunged at Alex and he grunted as his back hit the ground. I barely had enough time to feel bad about it before his lips were against my own. I don’t know if I was the one who had kissed him or if he had kissed me, but once it started, nothing could have kept us apart.
I gripped Alex by his thick blonde hair and growled into his ear as I allowed my hands to finally roam his body. I could feel him shiver pleasantly under my touch. His muscles were hard, and tense from the fight we had just had, and his clear eyes had lost the infuriating quality that had made me want to rip him apart. Now, they were almost gentle, if I could ignore that compelling steely quality in them.
In truth, I was used to people being afraid of me. Although Jake had betrayed me and tried to assert himself with me, there was no denying that he was afraid of me. Any time I would get annoyed about anything and express it, his eyes would grow wide and he would avoid me. I had more power than I realized back then, but that was all gone now. How could I have been so stupid?
“You’re beating yourself up again!” Alex exclaimed, pulling away from my lips. “You get so dark.”
“So what?” I murmured. “Did I ask you to keep tabs on my feelings? Fuck off.”
“Seriously,” Alex said, sitting me up and pushing me back so that he could look me in the eye. “I think you’re great. You should too.”
“You don’t know anything about me,” I said, standing up. Alex stood too.
“I know enough. Your energy says it all. No wonder people took advantage of you. If you feel worthless you become worthless!”
“That’s enough!” I roared, shoving Alex as hard as I could. He flew back and hit a tree hard. I hated what I was doing to him. Why couldn’t I stop?
“You’re angry because the truth hurts,” Alex panted, struggling to regain his balance. “You’re mad at me for telling you things you don’t want to hear. Things you don’t believe. But you should, Decker. You’re the alpha.”
“Stop saying that!”
I leaped forward, pinning Alex to the tree. He didn’t fight me off or struggle. He just looked calmly into my eyes. The stability I saw in him immediately extinguished the rage I felt. I don’t know how he did it, but it was impressive.
“I say what I believe,” Alex said again. “I do what I think is right. No matter what happens to me. I’m already the omega. I have nothing to lose from being myself. And neither do you. You know why?”
I didn’t answer.
“Because you’re on top.”
I wanted to apologize to him, repent for being so hurtful and cruel. For using his body and clothes and generosity the way Jake had used me. But the words wouldn’t come.
“It’s all right,” Alex said, touching my face. “There’s nothing to apologize for if you’re being authentic.”
I kissed him then, a kiss more tender and true than any I had ever had in my life. It felt better than any kiss I’d shared with Jake. Better, in fact, than any of the many memories we had made together.
What was different this time?
It suddenly dawned on me. I was in control.
Chapter 16
The impressive muscles of Alex’s abdomen rippled with resistance when I pulled him closer to me. It wasn’t that he was resisting; he just hadn’t expected the movement. I was faster than he was, I noted. I was a lot stronger too. It was a strength I had always been wary of; a strength I felt safe hiding when I was with Jake. Maybe part of the reason Jake had been able to manipulate me was because I had never been comfortable with my own power. Others envied it, and I knew I could use it for either good or evil. But it never felt real; it never felt mine.
All of that changed with Alex. He pushed and prodded me, encouraged me to embrace the truth of my power. I was still uncomfortable, but it was liberating to know that he wasn’t afraid of what I was. He wasn’t even jealous. He was aroused by it.
I reached between us until my fingers grazed his shaft. It was hard and warm against my skin, and I gripped him with a gentle firmness that made his knees buckle. I gave his cock a long, sensual tug and was filled with desire when a soft gasp escaped Alex’s lips.
Without thinking twice, I whipped Alex around against the tree. He braced himself, and I took a moment to admire the perfection of his athletic body. He was lithe and powerful in his own right, as all bear shifters were, but it was clear that I was the alpha here.
Urgent desire pulsed through me, and I released my cock from its confines. Alex shuddered when he felt me press it against his inner thigh, and thrills of anticipation electrified me. I glanced up at Alex’s hands, and saw his long fingers gripping the bark of the tree in an effort to brace himself. He had already had a taste of my power, and he was ready for more.
The time for hesitation was over. I hissed as tendrils of ecstasy coursed from the head of my cock all the way through my body as I slowly began to push inside of him. His body relaxed against me, letting me do all the work. I reached around and gripped his cock, squeezing it hard. Alex cried out softly, his shaft swelling in my hand. It was more than I could bear.
In one, languid movement, I thrust my hips and with earth-shattering power, I began unleashing the power of my longing on Alex. I could feel him tighten around my cock, and the friction of our bodies created the most blissful sensation I had ever experienced. There was no guilt or reluctance this time; we both knew exactly what we were doing. All I wanted was to claim Alex. He would be mine, now, and for all of time. And I had a feeling that he had known it all along; right from the moment he had seen me.
The bond between us was unmistakable. Because of their separation, I had always thought my mother had been exaggerating about the strength of the force between two shifters who were meant to be mated for life. I certainly hadn’t felt any such power with Jake. I could never read his moods or thoughts the way my mother claimed she could with my father, and I would too, once I found the right person for me.
But now, I could feel Alex’s pleasure almost as acutely as my own. I knew just how to move to make a small grunt turn into a deep moan. His shaft was throbbing in my hand and I knew exactly what to do to make it weep for me. And, whether he liked it or not, I could delay his climax until I was ready to join him.
When it came time for me to notice the building of my orgasm, something about it felt different. I had climaxed before, many times, but something about this one felt as if all of the energy in the universe was being channeled right through my body and into Alex. Pleasure electrified every atom in my body, and Alex began to tremble beneath me as my wild thrusting became harder and more concentrated. He was on the brink of a powerful climax, but I would hold it off, until…
Alex glanced over his shoulder at me and our eyes locked. In that one, tiny moment, I felt eternity in my hands. I understood the significance of our roles as shifters and the truth in Alex’s words. I had to embrace my destiny. I had to be myself. And when I was, my perfect mate would be waiting.
A deep roar began to rumble from deep within my breast, and Alex cried out loudly as I unleashed a roar more powerful than any I had ever done, even in my bear form. It echoed in the forest as my hot climax spilled out of me, filling Alex completely with my seed. He shuddered beneath me, and I was gratified by the hot sensation of his orgasm spilling into my hand. I could feel every drop of life in it, in him, and I closed my eyes to relish the moment. It was the first time I had understood sex as a spiritual act; and myself as a man with a place in the world.
Alex slowly lowered his hands from the trunk of the tree and stood with his back to me for a few seconds. His breathing was heavy, and he was looking down, as if something on the ground had transfixed him. When he turned to face me, his clear eyes were shining with tears.
“See,” he said, gesturing down to his stomach. “I knew you could do it.”
What I saw made my heart jump to my throat. Alex had a light purple rash spreading across his stomach, and beneath his bellybutton was a tiny mound. I had to blink hard and look again before it began to make any sense in my mind. Alex was pregnant. And Alex’s pregnancy could only mean one thing. I was the true alpha.
Chapter 17
When we arrived back at the boarding house, Miss Abby was sitting on the porch in her rocking chair, chatting with her daughter Penelope.
“Glory be…” she muttered, adjusting her glasses to stare as Alex walked toward her. “Penelope, get this boy the Concoction.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Penelope said, leaving her post by the mailbox to hustle inside.
“Well,” Miss Abby said, eyeing us both closely. “Looks like you two have some courting to do.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, and Alex pursed his lips.
“What’s going to happen?” he asked, touching the tiny mound of his belly gently. He already seemed attached to the baby, and I felt a small surge of pride.
“I reckon you’ll give birth in two to three weeks,” Miss Abby said, rocking slowly. “You two will have to get a place of your own. This is no place to raise a child.”
“I’ve already got a place,” I said darkly. There was no way that Jake and Walker were going to get away with stealing my home. It was more than that to me. It was my birthright. If I was going to have a child, I was going to raise it in the same place where I was raised. Walker and Jake be damned.
“Well that’s one botheration out of the way,” Miss Abby said, the ghost of a smile on her lips. She looked hard at me as if trying to measure me up and determine what I might be capable of. Fortunately, she seemed to approve of what she saw. “But there’s the matter of tending to this pregnancy. Things are all right for now, but this time next week, Alex here’s not going to be allowed to walk or move anywhere.”
“What? Why?” Alex didn’t like the sound of being bedridden, and I couldn’t rightly blame him for it.
“Honey, you’ll know why when it happens.”
Alex frowned down at the ground and Miss Abby laughed.
“It’s just the facts of life, that’s all. There’s going to be a lot of aches and pains and swelling, you know. And you’ll need the Concoction every day to make sure that baby of yours comes out healthy and happy,” she said. “It’s good for the father to be, too. Helps numb some of the pain. Bear babies grow fast in a human womb; I reckon it’s a comfortable place to stay. You have a long road ahead of you, boy. But we’ll help you along the way.”
Alex glanced at me, and then looked back at Miss Abby.
“That depends on what Decker is going to do,” he said. It was as if he could read my mind. I was already plotting my revenge on Walker and Jake. Our baby would be born in the house I grew up in. And Alex was going to help me.
“What do you think, Mr. Decker?”
“You said Alex will still have his strength on his side for the rest of the week, right?”
Miss Abby nodded, but said nothing. The same inquisitive look was on her face; as if she was waiting for me to say just the right thing.
“You and I both know I don’t belong here,” I said carefully. “Not permanently. Or else I would have been raised here by my father.”
“That’s an interesting point,” Miss Abby said. “But just what are you getting at?”
“I appreciate all your help. I truly do. But I would like to take Alex and my child back to New Orleans. I have a home there. I never should have left in the first place.”
Miss Abby’s face broke out into a knowing smile, and she gave me a low nod. “Sounds like a good plan to me.”
I looked over at Alex, and saw that his face was shining with pride. He had helped me to embrace who I really was. And now, with his help, I would be able to reclaim my place among my pack.
Chapter 18
The next two days went by in a frenzy. I didn’t have much packing to do, but everybody was talking our ears off, giving us advice about what to do during a pregnancy. Roger had given birth long ago, before he had been kicked out of his pack for trying too hard to help his alpha son grow into a responsible leader, and he had the best advice for Alex.
They talked frequently in the lounge as Miss Abby and Penelope put me to work in the kitchen so that I would learn the formula for “the Concoction” like the back of my hand. I didn’t mind though. I would do anything to make sure Alex and the baby were safe. But we wouldn’t be able to settle down; not until my plan went into action.
“You don’t mind living in New Orleans, do you?” I asked Alex the night before we were scheduled to leave. Alex grinned and shook his head.
“You know I prefer the city life,” he said. “There are a lot of things I love about the Bayou, but it’s not where I would want to raise my family.”
I grinned at him and his eyes sparkled. We kissed and then settled in to bed. I couldn’t sleep knowing that so much was about to change. There was a slight possibility that my plan wouldn’t work; that I would come back to the Bayou with Alex, both of us humiliated and ashamed by the fact that we had failed at our mission. But there was no doubt in my mind about what we had to do, and I was going to do it, no matter what.
***
Once I fell asleep, the night went by too quickly. Before I knew it, it was morning, and Penelope was summoning me for breakfast one last time.
“We’ll be sad to see you go, Mr. Decker,” Miss Abby said, once the time came for us to leave, despite her face being bright and reassuring. “But we know that you and your omega will always have the advantage together. That’s just the way it is.”
“Thank you for everything,” I said, kissing her cheek. “You’ve been very kind.”
“Nonsense,” she said, waving her hand. “But you boys and that baby of yours had better come to visit if you know what’s good for you.”
“Yes, ma’am!” Alex said, moving past me to give her a hug. He was such a gentle soul. What kind of lottery had I won to deserve him?
“Y’all take care, now,” Miss Abby said, smiling brightly. “And mind yourselves on that motorcycle of yours!”
I smiled. “I’ll behave.”
Everybody from the boarding house gathered on the porch to see us off; even Eustis. Paul and old Mrs. Allestar had come over to see us off as well, and we said our good byes. It was going to be a long ride back to New Orleans, and frankly we had a lot of planning to do.
“Can we pull over, Decker? I have to pee.”
“Again?” I exclaimed.
“These bear babies grow fast, you know,” Alex said, fixing me with a pout through the rearview mirror of the bike. I sighed and pulled over, letting Alex relieve himself before getting back on the road.
“I have an idea,” I said to him. I had been thinking long and hard about how to get my revenge on Walker and Jake. “But I really need you to help me out.”
“Like I said,” Alex said, smiling broadly at me. “Revenge is my specialty.”
I smiled, shocked by this man’s willingness to throw everything away for me. He was the most vulnerable he was ever going to be, and letting me drag him into a fight that he had nothing to do with. But whether I deserved that kind of devotion or not, he was ready and willing to protect and serve me at all costs, and I planned on returning the favor.
“You’re going to love it in New Orleans,” I promised him. The closer we got to my home, the more excited I became. I fully believed that we were going to come out on top. “Maybe we could even get married.”
Alex was quiet for a moment, and at first I worried that I had brought up marriage too soon. But when I looked at him in the mirror, his beautiful eyes were filled with tears.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I have a feeling that’s going to be happening a lot.”
I laughed heartily. Between my pregnant omega and riding into the bright blue sky toward my rightful home, nothing was going to bring me down.
Chapter 19
I parked the motorcycle a few miles outside of New Orleans city limits.
“Are you ready?” I asked Alex.
He nodded silently and reached into his pocket. I did the same, and pulled out the amulet that Miss Abby had given us. I draped it around my neck for the first time, surprised when nothing seemed to happen. I had expected some kind of strange feeling or electricity, but it was just like putting on any other type of jewelry.
I didn’t notice the difference until Alex put his amulet on. His bear scent disappeared completely, and he smiled reassuringly at me. He was confident that our plan would work.
“All right,” I said. “Let’s go. Remember, nothing strenuous. You just give me the signals and don’t fight unless you really can’t avoid it. If that happens, don’t just fight for your life. Fight for the baby’s, too.”
Alex’s face grew serious and he nodded. “I’ll do whatever it takes.”
We headed through the foliage until we came upon the city. Seeing it again made my heart lurch. I hadn’t expected to ever have to leave this place. But now, I was back with a vengeance.
“First place to scope out is the bar,” I whispered, walking stealthily through the crowded streets with Alex on my heels. “That’s where the pack likes to gather. Jake is usually there. He’s kind of an alcoholic.”
Alex raised an eyebrow, and we continued until we reached the bar.
“We’re not going inside just yet,” I said. “I want to give them a taste of their own medicine first.”
Alex grinned, and we crept to the parking lot, where I confirmed that Walker and Jake were at the bar.
“Look what I can do,” Alex whispered. He smiled and before I could stop him, cut the gas lines of their motorcycles.
I laughed in disbelief.
“Come on, we need to see through the window. Watch them until they come out. That’s when we can strike.”
Alex nodded, and we surveyed the area for about an hour before Walker finally came out of the tavern for a cigarette.
He didn’t even register our presence when we crept up on either side of him.
“What the…you’re an omega too!” Alex exclaimed, doubling over with laughter. Walker’s eyes grew wide and he turned toward Alex, raising his hand to strike. I lunged forward, tackling Walker away. We were thrown off the porch together and rolled in the dirt until we were a few feet away from the tavern.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Walker snarled, once he got a good look at my face.
“Payback’s a bitch,” I growled. I punched him in the face as Alex continued laughing on the porch. I was glad he was staying out of it.
“Like hell!” Walker said, shrugging off the punch and getting to his feet. He gripped the collar of my shirt and glared into my eyes. “You think you’re something? You’re shit! I know it, Jake knows it; everybody knows it!”
“I don’t know it,” Alex said, suddenly behind Walker. Walker gagged as Alex gripped him in a headlock and I struggled away from Walker’s grip.
“Stand down, Alex!” I warned. Alex didn’t seem to hear me. I frowned, my baby’s safety in mind, and shoved Alex away from Walker. “I said stand down!”
Alex scowled, but raised his hands up and backed away.
“Boy, that was a mistake.”
A familiar voice from behind me made my blood run cold. I felt every possible range of human emotion I could have felt; Jake was near me, and I had just given up the advantage.
“You know what was a mistake?” I asked. “Loving you. Trusting you. Taking care of you like the little bitch with daddy issues that you really are.”
Even in the dark I could tell that Jake’s face had grown beet-red, and he reached out menacingly for my neck. I dodged his grab and punched him square in the face.
“All right!” Alex cheered. I glanced up at him just as Jake threw a punch at me. It connected and I was thrown backward.
“You never took care of me!” Jake exclaimed. “I took care of you!”
He liked to make it seem that way when we were together, and it made me feel a small shred of doubt.
“Remember who the alpha is!” Alex shouted.
“Take care of him!” Jake bellowed to Walker.
Walker, who had been watching from a distance, nodded. Apparently Jake had a new bitch in his corner to do his dirty work.
“No!” I tried to intervene, but it was too late. Walker, who was fast for an omega, crouched down and ran toward Alex, knocking him off balance. He fell stomach first onto the ground and cried out in pain.
I was filled with blind rage, and I turned my eyes on Jake.
“You shouldn’t have done that,” I said in a low, cold voice.
Jake smirked, which only darkened my energy more.
“You really…shouldn’t…have done that…”
I was losing control. Everything I had ever feared about myself, about being an alpha, was bubbling to the surface after years of repression. And, my new target was the man I had repressed it all for, out of a naïve desire to protect him the most. Jake.
This wasn’t good.
Chapter 23
My body quaked in rage as tufts of dark black fur began erupting all over my body. I could feel my muscles contracting and expanding, and I unleashed a hellish roar that made Jake’s face grow white.
“Decker, I’m just fucking around, man, calm down!”
But I was past the point of no return. Jake glanced over at Walker, and I was relieved to find Alex getting shakily to his feet. Just as I had asked him to do, he retreated to watch from a distance. He must have been shaken up from the close call with the baby. I hoped everything was all right.
When Jake saw that I was nowhere near calming down, he shrugged.
“Have it your way,” he said. He bit his thumb (the self-inflicted pain always got him off enough to shift) and his grey colored fur began to cover his body. There was a time I would have given anything to see Jake in his bear form, but now, all I wanted to do was destroy him.
Jake growled at me and I lunged at him, catching his shoulder in my teeth. I was gratified by the salt of his sweat, and the bitter taste of blood.
Jake cried out, slashing at me with his big paws. I barely registered the pain as his claws penetrated my skin. Instead, I focused on my next move. I had seen him fight a thousand times. Now it was my turn.
His favorite move was to go for the throat, even when things were just playful. He felt a surge of power from that, so I was able to evade it when his muzzle tried to find its way to my jugular. Jake whimpered when my sharp teeth grazed his muzzle, and I got a grip on the soft fleshy area of his neck.
I was prevented from making the final move by Walker, who had shifted into his bear form while I was distracted. Walker tackled me from behind, sinking his teeth deep into the skin on the back of my neck. I sank down to the ground as Jake watched, his eyes filled with malice. I hadn’t been able to take them both the first time, how could I manage to take them now?
Walker had me pinned and Jake made his way toward me. I tried to figure out the best way to take them both down, but I was still trying to fight Walker’s teeth. He had been wanting to tear into me for years, and now that he had the chance, he wasn’t going to go easy on me. I was struggling as I tried to get to my feet, but between Jake and Walker’s teeth in my neck, I couldn’t go very far.
A sudden roar echoed in the air, and all of us were startled to see Alex barreling toward us. Jake tried to intercept him, but Alex was faster and much more graceful. He leapt over Jake and landed on top of Walker, sinking his teeth into Walker’s neck. I scrambled out from beneath him and set my sights on Jake.
Jake was dazed as he watched Alex tear into his best friend. Blood was beginning to stain the ground, and I looked away, unable to watch Walker being tortured. I had other things to worry about. Alex was protecting his family, and he was going to do it to the fullest. I didn’t have to babysit him. He would take care of himself.
I caught Jake’s eye and growled, and we began circling each other. Sometimes with him it felt like I would never win, no matter what. But right now, I knew I had a chance. Being with Alex had taught me all there was to know about myself. And I remembered something very useful. Jake was very afraid of me.
I got onto my hind legs, a powerful display. Jake was much smaller than I was when we shifted, and he stood too, but fear was rolling off of him in waves. I roared powerfully and struck him hard in the throat. A deep gash opened up and Jake cowered away from me. I was ready to finish him off and tear him to pieces. But to my surprise, he began to shrink.
“Peace, man! I call a truce!”
He was small and naked and afraid. I had never felt more revulsion for anybody than I felt for Jake in that moment. He was exactly what I thought he was; just an insecure, spoiled brat.
I looked over at Alex and Walker to make sure that everything was okay, and was relieved to find Alex standing over Walker. Walker had shifted back to his human form, too weak to maintain the taxing metabolic state of a bear any longer, and Alex had him pinned to the ground with one huge paw.
I got Alex’s attention and signaled that it was time to shift back to our human forms. Alex looked relieved. He must have been tired; pregnancy was hard enough without having to maintain your bear form.
“I don’t ever want to see you two again,” I growled once we were all facing each other. “This is my pack, now, just as it always was.”
I realized that several members of our pack had come out of the bar to watch the show, and rather than looking angry that their leaders were being outcasted, they looked prouder than I had ever seen them look.
“You heard them,” one burly man said, coming forward and shoving Walker in the back. “Get the hell out of here!”
I took Alex’s hand, and together we watched as Jake and Walker were booed out of New Orleans, leaving us alone with our pack.
Chapter 24
“This is your new home,” I said, helping Alex through the doorway. He was a little bit tired, but the light in his eyes was brighter than I had ever seen it before. “Are you sure the baby’s okay?”
“She’s fine,” Alex assured me. I stared at him for a moment, my heart warm.
“She?”
Alex smiled at me and I pulled him close, kissing him gently on the lips.
“I can’t believe that we actually pulled that off,” I whispered, laughing and tasting his lips.
“I can,” Alex said, stroking down my broad chest. “There are a lot of things you’re capable of, and soon you’ll know every single one of them.”
I considered this for a moment, but quickly forgot as Alex’s lips became more urgent against mine, and my hands developed a mind of their own. I touched him everywhere; from the top of his head, lacing my fingers through his thick blonde hair, down to the small mound of his stomach where our baby girl was growing.
“I love you,” I whispered.
Alex looked up at me, his eyes flashing. “I know. I love you, too.”
I took his hand and led him to the bedroom, doing my best to be tender with him considering his condition. I knew it wouldn’t be long before he was bedridden, and then sex would no longer be an option. I wanted our break from it to be that night, right then, to consecrate our union and the home we were going to share for the rest of our lives.
I kissed Alex tenderly, allowing my lips to linger on his and relishing in the gentle waves of electricity that traveled through my body. He closed his eyes, running his hand down my cheek and under my shirt. I let him pull it over my head, and helped him to remove my belt and the rest of my clothes.
“Let’s try something new,” I said softly, stripping Alex and moving slowly to his waist. I could feel myself growing hard with longing as I took his shaft into my hands and wrapped my mouth around it. He moaned softly as I ran my tongue lightly across the sensitive nerve endings in his penis and finally enveloped it in my mouth.
He moaned loudly, and my cock became swollen with longing as I pleasured him, taking all the time I hadn’t taken before in order to appreciate all of the wonders of his body.
“Stop,” he whispered. “I’m going to come.”
I smiled up at him, and he furrowed his eyebrows.
“Good,” I said. “Then you can do it again when I’m inside of you.”
Alex groaned and his eyes rolled into the back of his head as I worked his shaft in my mouth, using my hands to caress his scrotum and explore the landscape of his body. I touched his nipple gently, making it hard beneath my fingertips, and then began bobbing my head furiously around his cock.
He hissed in pleasure, and soon I was gratified by the taste of his semen.
“Fuck,” he mumbled.
I smiled at him and rolled him onto his side. Miss Abby had told us not to let him put pressure on his stomach, so I caressed his body and held him from the side, gently working myself between the hot opening of his ass.
Alex shuddered in pleasure, and I swallowed hard, biting back a moan as my head, then my entire shaft, disappeared inside of him. I bucked my hips gently against him, and he slowly writhed, grinding his hips and teaching me the parameters of his pregnant body.
I kissed and sucked the nape of his neck, and he shuddered in pleasure as, again and again, I disappeared inside of him.
My self-control was beginning to wane, and Alex seemed to sense it, because he began to grind me, harder and a little bit faster, until it was all I could do to keep from coming. Alex turned to me, his deep eyes boring into mine, and he kissed me lightly on the lips.
“I love you,” he whispered.
Somehow, that did it, and we climaxed together as our tongues massaged each other. The unexpected explosion was the most powerful of any orgasm I had ever felt, and Alex intertwined his fingers with mine.
“Thank you for being with me,” I said.
“Thank you for being the alpha I knew you were,” he replied.