JENNA

 

Left behind by the person I thought would never leave me I’m standing at the edge of the bridge overlooking the Cumberland River with Noah by my side.

How did I get here?

How did the one thing that matters most to me just leave me behind?

Upset with the uncontrollable tears I refuse to be touched by Noah.

 

“I needed you to see,” he whispers.

“See what? That you can ruin everything that happens in my life? Noah, you destroy everything.” I finally give him every single thought that has ever crossed my mind.

“What do you mean?” he seems genuinely confused.

“You left me for drugs, cops, all kinds of shady things. Money problems you couldn’t tell me about. You never trusted me. You never confided in me. Then you try to blackmail me, which almost worked. You gave something important to your once best friend in order to keep me, but you still lost me, and it’s something you can’t live without.”

“What makes you such an expert on my life?” he snorts.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about. You manipulate.”

“Yeah, okay,” he huffs.

“You ruined what was supposed to be a happy moment in my life. We’re over Noah, does that mean you’re going to destroy everything that that would make me happy?”

“I’m sad you would even think that.”

I can’t help but laugh, “You just did that. You ruined yet another thing in my life.”

He tries to wrap his arms around my hip but I move away, “NO!” and in the corner of my eye I see the neglect cross his face.

Noah and I had a good relationship. It was decent. But it was nothing in comparison to Bennett and I. We had passion, desire, love, and a need for each other. Noah and I were reserved, held back, and decent. His hands were never all over me when we were close, unlike Bennett who can’t seem to keep his hands off me. He’s very touchy feely and loves to show me off, another attribute Noah was lacking. I’ve come to realize Bennett is my better half.

“Take it easy, Noah,” I try to walk away but take one last look at him, “It’s time to let me go. Move on with your life. There’s someone out there waiting for you to pick her up. She needs you more than me. She needs you to be her hero. I’m doing great without you, probably better without you, don’t waste your time with me.”

I know it sounds harsh. I know he has hopes, has always had hope, but I’m not the girl for him, no matter how often he might tell himself otherwise. One of us has to be the strong one in the relationship and if it’s not going to be him, it might as well be me. A part of me might remember him and have a little bit of love for him, we were together for a long time, I even grieved for him when I thought he was dead, but I have to remind myself, it wasn’t real. There was too much deceit. There was too much heartache in a relationship where it shouldn’t have been. Maybe I made mistakes. He sure did. It’s not a relationship I plan to continue.

“Goodbye,” I make sure he hears it and I’m surprised to hear a sincere goodbye in return.