CHAPTER 43
Kenzie
Panic raced through my veins, cold and sharp, the closer we got to my building.
My palms grew clammy, my heart raced.
I wondered if I was having a heart attack, but figured it was closer to a panic attack. Either way, damn Aaron for putting me in such a horrible mindset the first real day on the job. I needed it sharp and he’d dulled it by surprising me.
“Can you please stop at the coffee shop on the corner, rather than taking me to the building I asked for?” The cab driver nodded, stopping short at the corner a few doors away from Madison Media Group’s headquarters.
I couldn’t go in right away, and it wasn’t like I needed the coffee—although it wouldn’t hurt. What I needed was time to think, to steel myself before I went up to my office.
I ordered a latte, keeping an eye out for people I recognized in case they decided to chat. I was sure there had to be a dozen of my colleagues in there, at least, given our proximity to the offices. None of them knew who I was. They didn’t know I was their new boss.
Their boss.
It had such a funny ring to it.
I was the boss.
I only reported to Reed, and nobody else. It was the first time in my life I had a bunch of employees under me.
No, scratch that. I’d had a team at Ricardo de Lugo, if only for a short time. I wondered what they were doing in light of Aaron’s arrest. Had any of them fled? I wouldn’t have blamed them if they had. It was inevitable that they’d lose their jobs one way or another, once the company went under. Stocks were already on the way down, down, down. Bad news had a tendency to do that to a company. How much longer could they stay afloat?
I didn’t want to entertain the thought for too long, but I knew the outlook was grim.
I compared myself to the others in line. I could tell who held higher positions just by the way they carried themselves, by their confidence. The way they dressed, the way they groomed themselves.
Did I fit the bill? Would any of them have picked me out of a lineup of possible executives? I had Aaron’s clothes and shoes to fall back on, but then what? I felt like the new kid in school, showing up halfway through the year and trying to catch up to the others.
I picked up my coffee and found a stool by the window just to buy myself a little extra “alone” time, even while surrounded by people all trying to get their last caffeine fix before facing another day.
The thought that Aaron’s company was sure to go down in flames was only another reminder of the strong decision I had made to leave. It was the right thing to do, the only smart choice I could make given the circumstances. I would be nowhere, otherwise. Jobless, hopeless.
But from Ricardo de Lugo right back to Madison Media Group where I had been miserable? Talk about out of the frying pan and into the fire. It seemed like the decisions I made were all based in near-panic, like I had a gun to my head and had to choose between staying on a sinking ship or chaining myself to an oar in a galley.
Either way, my future looked bleak.
That was then, this was now. I tried to tell myself that.
Back then, in my old position, I’d been stepped over, stepped on, ignored until there was something that needed to be done. Back then, I wasn’t senior management. I could write my future in my favor. I would be my own hero, dammit, and nobody could stop me.
Or so I told myself.
My knees quaked at the thought. I didn’t know how to be a manager, much less at a senior level. Was it worth going back to a company I loathed just for a great job title and amazing perks? If I didn’t know how to lead effectively, what sort of difference could I make? If I didn’t know how to voice my thoughts and ideas in a strong, authoritative way, I would still be ignored.
I couldn’t win.
Which was why it was no big deal for Reed to put me in the position. It all came together. He knew I would be ineffectual.
At least, he thought I would be.
My spine stiffened as I thought about the way he’d planned it out. Once again, he’d assumed he could use me. I would show him a thing or two.
He was just as good at plotting as Aaron, wasn’t he? Almost too good.
I had to wonder again whether Aaron was telling the truth when he claimed that Reed lied about . . . well, about everything. That he was about to get what was coming to him. I’d just assumed at the time that he’d been tap dancing, saying anything he thought would get me to pay attention.
After drinking half of my latte and going over the whole thing in my mind, I was more inclined to believe him. And I felt sorry, suddenly, for turning my back on him.
No! This didn’t take away all the other deceit. Right. He’d told more lies. He’d used me, shipped me off to an island to keep me from learning the truth.
The man would stop at nothing, and he always had some half-assed rationalization for why he did things. A total narcissist.
I wouldn’t let him get to me, and I wouldn’t give him another moment’s thought. He had taken up enough of my time—frankly, so had Reed. I would go to work, and I would kick ass. Things would start changing at Madison, and fast.
I hoped Reed still thought I would roll over and play dead, content with the shiny things he’d put in front of me. Because he was dead wrong. I would take pleasure in proving it to him.
Besides, I reminded myself as I took the short stroll to headquarters, it wasn’t as if I could afford to go jobless. The promise of all that money was nice, but I hadn’t seen a paycheck yet.
If Reed proved completely impossible to work with, I might consider finding a new job. If anything, Aaron tearing me away from Madison in the first place was enough of a kick in the pants to remind me how valuable I really was.
Others would notice.
He was right about my talent, my work ethic. He’d reminded me that I deserved better, even if his inspiration and methods were less-than-pure.
I shook myself as I took the elevator, taking deep breaths. I was a little late—who cared, when I was the senior vice president? It meant I had the elevator to myself since everyone else had to be in by nine. Ah, the little perks of sitting just shy of the top of the heap.
I chuckled quietly as the doors opened—and came face-to-face with Reed Kingsley, and the three grim-faced cops who were standing behind him.
My mouth dropped open.
“Kenzie,” Reed murmured, his eyes wide and pleading. I didn’t know what to say, what to feel. What to do.
I forced my feet to move, hopping out of the elevator to make room for the men. I caught a glimpse of Reed’s hands, cuffed behind his back. I gasped, turning away to find everyone on the floor standing there, some with their hands over their mouths, others a sick shade of green. More than a few of the women looked like they were going to cry.
I looked back at the elevator, where the doors were closing. I caught one more glimpse of Reed, and he was gone.
The shock was almost too much to bear. They arrested him. He was on his way to—where? Jail? For what? It was all too confusing, too shocking. But perhaps Aaron was right.
Paula came over to me, shaking in her mile-high heels. “What will we do?”
“Did they say anything?” I asked, searching her red, tear-stained face for clues.
She shook her head, her blonde ponytail swinging like a pendulum. “No. Nothing that I could hear. The worst part was, he seemed to accept it. Like he had been waiting for it or something. I don’t know—what could he have done to deserve something like this?”
I put my arms around her slim frame, trying as I could to comfort her. I wondered at her attitude. Like he was a saint. She knew better than anyone else how terrible he could be. But being a crappy boss wasn’t illegal—if it had been, prisons would be more overcrowded than they already were.
“What should we do?” I didn’t know which member of the crowd asked the question, considering how many people stared at me.
At first, I wondered who the heck they were staring at. I wanted to turn around, see who stood behind me. Surely I wasn’t the person they looked to for guidance.
Then it hit me.
I was that person.
Second in command.
They knew it.
I was now the acting CEO by default.
Blood drained from my brain. I thought I might faint.
Get it together. This is it. What you’ve always wanted.
Bullshit! I didn’t want it! I didn’t want to be the CEO of such an unwieldy company!
Even if I thought I had, there was a big difference between wanting something and having it. Like a kid wishing for the moon, who got it and had no idea what to do with it when she did.
That was me.
“Okay,” I said, reminding myself to lose the shaky quality of my voice. “Everybody back to work. I’ll make sense of this, and I’ll let you know what I find out. In the meantime, no worries. Let’s all do our jobs as if nothing happened.” My first words as CEO. My first commands. Oh shit, I might pee myself.
“Are you all right?” Paula asked.
“I will be,” I whispered. “Just give me a minute.”
“I think we all need a minute right about now.”
“Unfortunately, all we have is thirty seconds, and that was twenty seconds ago.” I couldn’t afford to falter, to bobble the ball now that it was in my court. “Walk with me.”
I couldn’t believe it. Adrenaline had taken over, sheer adrenaline carrying me down the hall. I peppered Paula with questions.
Did Reed have any meetings today? They would need to be canceled or rescheduled with me. Could she forward me his emails until I got the IT department to reroute them directly to me?
She stopped at that request, biting her lip. “Even personal emails?” she asked.
I frowned. “There’s no such thing as personal emails on the company server,” I reminded her. “That’s Employee Handbook, page three or something like that. I’m pretty sure Reed wrote that bit himself. If he wrote and accepted private emails through the company’s host, shame on him. I want it all because it’s all property of the company.”
“Right,” she said, resolute. “Gotcha.”
“Thank you.” I made a mental note to double-check the emails after the IT guys did their job. I wondered if Paula might “forget” to send some to me, or “accidentally” delete anything she didn’t think I should see. I liked Paula a lot, but all of a sudden I felt like we were on different sides. She was still faithful to her boss—and that wasn’t me.
I made another mental note to find a new assistant if my hunch was correct. Funny how clearly I could think when blind panic led the way.
“Okay,” I smiled. “Please let the IT staff know that I need this done immediately. I have to get on top of this—I’m sure our investors will be pleased to know there’s an interim CEO in place.”
“Absolutely.” Paula left me alone in my office, the door closed behind her.
I knew I would only have a few minutes of peace before things started blowing up. We would need a statement—I had to speak to the company’s attorneys about that. We would face the same crowds outside of the building as we had at Ricardo de Lugo. There would need to be a company-wide email, detailing the rule that no one was to speak to the press at any time. Nothing on personal social media accounts, either. Anyone who violated that order would be terminated.
My head spun, thoughts flying fast and furious. I typed these notes to myself, my fingers pummeling the keys.
As long as I focused on plugging the holes, I couldn’t focus on Aaron.
I didn’t want to.
Not yet.
Not when it was clear he’d been telling the truth about Reed.
When would the drama end?