I woke up in Dante’s arms. During the night we’d moved around. I was no longer sleeping on his chest, instead I was on my side and he’d tucked himself up behind me. Big spoon, little spoon. It was classic and holy shit was it comfortable.

He had his arms wrapped around me, holding me close so that, even with the slight chill in the morning air, I felt warm. It radiated off his body and I just wanted to stay snuggled here for as long as I could.

Eventually he stirred, breaking the sleeping spell and I had to open my eyes. It took me a second to recognize my surroundings. The tent seemed to be bathed in a warm glow as the sun filtered through the roof of the tent, giving everything a weird sort of haze that told me this could totally have been a dream. But as Dante moved behind me, halting his starring role as Big Spoon to stretch, I realized it wasn’t. This was the beginning of the rest of my life.

“Good morning,” he grumbled.

“Good morning,” I replied, my voice heavy with sleep.

“How did you sleep?” he asked, squinting over at me.

I thought about it. I really thought about it. I felt well rested. Really well rested. I don’t think I’d had a decent nights sleep for a while and last night was… it wasn’t what I was expecting but it certainly was nice.

“Really well, actually,” I said. “You?”

“I always sleep better when there is someone to snuggle with,” he said with a smile.

We got ourselves ready, me pulling on last night’s clothes, Dante getting into a fresh set from his overstuffed suitcase. I still couldn’t believe how much he’d packed.

I helped him clear up, packing his books and magazines into a second suitcase he had stored under his bed and loading everything into the back of his Jeep. Down in the clearing, everyone else seemed to be following suit. They were helping each other pack up their tents and making sure the area didn’t look too “lived in” before climbing into their cars and driving off.

“Are we heading back today?” I asked as I watched some of the cars drive down a dirt track towards the road. “Back to where your pack lives, I mean.”

“You mean our pack,” he said and a glow warmed my chest. “You’re one of us now, Owen, it will be your home too, remember that.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” he chuckled. “Just get used to being part of the –”

From the bushes someone leapt out, clattering into Dante and tackling him to the ground. I jumped, I’m pretty sure I screamed.

“Dante!” I said, hurrying towards him only to find him laughing on the ground with a muscular white man with shaggy black hair. They were both in fits of giggles and I was almost annoyed at myself for expecting the worst. Though considering the amount of attacks that have happened recently, whoever this guy was, he was clearly a fucking asshole.

They picked themselves up and Dante had this wide grin on his face that made my heart skip a beat. It stretched across his whole face and right up to his eyes, creasing them at the corners and making him look so deliriously happy. I couldn’t read him, even now. There were so many different sides to him.

“Sorry about that, Owen,” he said, still grinning widely. “This is Lesander Hill, one of the Eastwind pack and my best friend.”

“Awww,” Lesander pulled a mildly disgusted face. “I’m your best friend Dante? That’s so sweet.” He pulled him into a headlock and ruffled his hair. It was all very brotherly, that little edge to everything Lesander was saying. He reached his hand out towards me. “A pleasure to meet you,” he said. “Jumpy little bastard aren’t you?”

I reached out and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you too, you scared the shit out of me.”

He laughed. “Well, sorry, I saw Dante had his guard down and had to take my shot,” he said. “Heard you were quite a find.”

I wasn’t entirely sure what he meant. “Where did you hear that?”

Lesander raised an eyebrow. “Everyone was talking about it at the Howl,” he said. “Everyone seemed to want you and old Dante here was the one that got you.”

Dante looked suddenly uncomfortable, the tension creeping up into his shoulders and making him look rigid. In those few moments next to Lesander he’d gone from looking like a big strong alpha to looking like a pup. Lesander had taken control of the moment, turning everything around so the focus was on him.

I stammered. “I - uh - I went with who I thought was the best pack, not the best offer.” A smile flickered at the corners of Dante’s mouth so I knew I’d said the right thing. “I know about Dante, I know about Eastwind.”

Lesander shrugged. “Well, welcome.” He turned back to Dante. “Mind if I catch a ride back with you Dante, everyone seems to have left without me.”

I can’t imagine why, I thought to myself.

“No problem,” Dante smiled and turned back to me. “You about ready to go, Owen?” I nodded. “Then let’s go, it’s a long way.”

We got into the car, Lesander taking the passenger seat and Dante driving. I was sat in the back, some of Dante’s stuff on the seat next to me. I kicked my shoes off and tucked my legs up beneath me, watching the world go by as we drove through the trees and out onto the road.

“So, what did you two get up to last night?” Lesander asked. I heard Dante tutting. “What? You bring a cute boy back to the camp,” he turned in his chair to look right at me, “You don’t mind me calling you cute, do you Owen?”

“I don’t think anything I could say would stop you.”

“Ooh, he’s a little fiery Dante, you sure you can handle that?”

"It’s none of your business what happened last night, Lesander, butt out.”

Lesander laughed. “Oh, I see how it is.” He turned to me again. “Could he not get it up?”

“Lesander!”

“Couldn’t salute to the general,” Lesander managed through his laughter. “Did you psych yourself out and get too nervous?”

“Lesander, that’s enough!” Dante said firmly. Silence fell in the car, the air suddenly feeling a lot stuffier. I could hardly breathe. “We just talked, and then we fell asleep, that’s all.”

“Okay Dante, sorry to pry,” Lesander said, though I could tell he wasn’t all that sorry at all. “Is no one going to ask what I got up to last night?”

“Do we really want to know?” Dante asked, rolling his eyes at me in the rear view mirror

He laughed again. He laughed a lot, I realized, so much that I couldn’t tell the difference between a genuine laugh and one that was fake.

“I think Dante might want to know,” he said. It was pointed, so pointed in fact that I swore I saw Dante twitch as he said it. “Dante? Anything to add?”

“Are you going to tell us or not?” he said, his voice short and clipped.

“Because you left early last night with your prize,” He caught my eye in the rear view mirror and smirked, “You missed the big news. You remember how Lakeshore Pack had that attack not too long ago–”

“Owen certainly does,” Dante said. “He’s from Lakeshore.” It was more than just an FYI for Lesander, Dante was stopping him from running his mouth and saying anything stupid. I half wanted Dante to catch my eye so I could mouth a “thank you” to him.

“Sorry to hear that, Owen,” Lesander said, though I didn’t really believe him. “Well, it turns out Duskfall had a human attack of their own last week.”

“Holy shit.” It slipped out before I had a chance to stop it. “Are they sure it was humans?” I asked. Raymond had been so certain, he’d seen the tracks, he’d taken photos, he’d taken a crack team out with him to find evidence which he said he would present to other packs in the area. Still no one came. He was heartbroken.

Lesander scoffed. “Like you even need to check, of course it was humans.” That struck me as careless. I tried not to let it bother me. “There was a raid a few nights ago at their camp back in Idaho and they lost about half their pack members.”

“Casualties?” Dante asked flatly.

“No casualties,” Lesander said. “Just fatalities. They were incisive and organized and they had one thing they wanted to do when they went in there and that was to kill. It’s disgusting.”

“It’s barbaric,” I breathed, my voice shaking. Dante looked up sharply. “How did they...how did the other half survive?”

“They ran for it,” he said. “They made for the trees, they hid in bushes, they attacked where they could but there was already so much bloodshed their alpha didn’t want to risk losing anymore people. Their camp was ransacked too. They did a lot of trading at the Howl and they called in a lot of favors.”

Dante was silent, his eyes fixed on the road. I could see his reflection in the windshield, the furrow in his brow deepening as he thought. I tried to look closer. He looked upset, pained even.

“Anything to say, Dante?” Lesander was pushing him, I could see it.

"Do we...do we need to go and help them?” I said, desperate for Dante to talk, to act, to do something, anything. “I might not be much of a fighter but I can help take care of people, or help them rebuild their camp, whatever they need.” That’s what I’d done when it had happened to us. I had taken care of anyone who was sick, any of the young pups who were now without parents. My house had pretty much become daycare but I didn’t mind.

“That’s very sweet of you, Owen, but you know they wouldn’t accept that,” Dante said quietly. “They would be much too proud to accept our help. We have to carry on as we are, would you agree, Lesander?”

“I would.”

“What does that mean?” I asked.

Dante took a breath. “When attacks have happened in the past, we have come up against the same questions. Not just when others are being attacked but when we were being attacked also.” He sighed. “We can’t take on the whole of humanity,” he said, suddenly sounding robotic, like he’d said it a thousand times before. “There has to be another way, but war is not the answer. It rarely is, but in this case it certainly isn’t.”

“Are you kidding?”

“Owen-”

“I’ve had members of my pack die because other packs sat around and did nothing, and you’re tell me that we should hide? That we should run away from it?”

“Owen-”

“This is bullshit.”

“Owen!” Dante barked. “This is a decision that has been made after hours of discussion with other members of the Eastwind Pack, your new pack. We have made this choice and we stand by it. Do I make myself clear?”

“I just don’t-”

“Owen,” Dante said, firmly. “I said, do I make myself clear?”

I sighed. “Clear as fucking crystal.”

I turned my gaze to the window and stared out at the passing cars, at the passing highway, leaning my head against the glass and wishing myself to be anywhere but here.

How could this be true? How could this in any way be fair? Packs were being hunted down and killed by humans and no one was going to do anything. My new alpha thought hiding was the best option when we were faced with an all out war with the humans. Raymond knew the truth. He knew they wanted us dead, that they didn’t want us here at all. And we were letting them pick us off one by one instead of fighting back like we should be. We could have torn them apart if we wanted to.

An hour or so later, we were back amongst the trees, driving up into the forest. The trees blocked out a lot of the sunlight and I found myself drifting in and out of sleep. I couldn’t help myself. The anger made me feel tired and the gentle rocking of the car on the uneven forest trails was surprisingly relaxing.

When we pulled up outside Lesander’s camp, a trailer near a shower block, I was still pretty riled up. I hardly said goodbye to Lesander, I didn’t climb into the front seat, I didn’t want to speak to Dante if I could help it. But I knew I couldn’t.

We drove past a few more trailers and a lot of log cabins, but we continued past them and up into a clearing where we stopped outside another log cabin. I suppose, what with him being the alpha, Dante had special privileges, so he got to be this high up and he got to live a much more comfortable life than the rest of his pack.

We unloaded the car in silence, Dante mostly putting things back where they should be in the house. I had exploded at him like an asshole and I suddenly didn’t know what to say. Would he want to take me back? Is that how Howl auctions worked? Could you get a refund?

"Can I… Can I take a shower?" I asked, a little sheepishly. I'd not had a chance to wash since yesterday morning and the long car journey hadn't exactly helped matters.

"It's just down the hall, there are towels in there," he said, quietly. "Can I show you the guest room?"

I blinked. "Guest room?"

He sighed. "I told you, this is about more than pups and you popping out babies, I want you to be as comfortable as possible. I don't want to force anything."

I bit my tongue.

He took my down the hall and I was faced with two doors. He pointed to the one on the left. "This one will be yours," he said. "There is a wardrobe and some drawers with space for your things when they arrive and a gorgeous king bed and, obviously, help yourself to any books I have out here. Me casa and all that." He tried a smile that I didn't return. It wounded him and my body went cold all over again. I opened my mouth to speak but he beat me to it.. "The bathroom is at the end." I hovered. I wanted to say more. I wanted to fix the awkwardness I’d created.. "You hungry?" he asked quickly.

"Sure," I said. "I could eat."

"I'll make us some dinner then," he smiled again, not waiting for me to return it, turning back to the rest of the cabin and walking away.

I took a long shower, letting the hot water run all over my body and wash away the nerves of yesterday, the anger and stupidity of the car ride, breathing deeply and trying to calm myself down. It was one thing. I wondered if I could change his mind.

When I'd finished in the shower, I went to my room and found some clothes on the bed, a note gentle placed on top of them. He had obscenely scruffy handwriting that I found oddly endearing.

'I know you don't have anything to wear right now, I hope these fit', with a small smiley face and a kiss beneath it.

I couldn't stop myself from smiling. He was too adorable.

I pulled on the sweatpants and the t-shirt, trying not to be too worried about the fact that I wasn't wearing underwear, and tried to fashion my hair into something a little presentable. When I stepped out of my bedroom, the cabin smelled incredible.

Dante was at the stove, frying some chicken and rice, throwing in herbs and spices in varying amounts like he'd done this a thousand times before. It was only now, in my slightly calmer state that I finally took in the decor of the cabin.

The walls were bare but for a few paintings that were hung up. There was a sofa and an armchair pointing at a TV, a coffee table in the middle of it. The kitchen was tiny, a sink a stovetop and a few overhead cupboards. Separating the kitchen from the living room was a small breakfast bar, a couple of seats on either side. I guess that was the replacement for the lack of dining table.

"It smells good," I said, loud enough that he heard and turned around with a slight grin.

"It's nothing special really," he said, his face had a sheen of sweat across it. "Chicken, rice, some vegetables. It's about all I can cook so don't start getting any ideas." He smiled and turned back to what he was making. "It's ready if you want to take a seat."

He'd made up the breakfast bar so it looked a lot more inviting. He'd set out two placemats, put a bottle of wine in the middle and two glasses. I took a seat and waited for him to join me.

We ate in silence, apart from when I told him how delicious it was and he thanked me. I helped him clear up, waving him away when he tried to protest me filling up the sink to wash the dishes. I couldn't stop him from joining me to dry them and it wasn't long before I felt our arms brushing as he reached for one of the plates.

We both stopped what we were doing. There were soap suds dripping from my hands, and he was just holding the plate in his. I was holding my breath, like I was waiting for him to do something, either to say something or to close the gap between us that honestly felt like a whole eternity of space.

So we disagreed on whether or not we should be hiding or being out and proud of our werewolf selves, but there was a spark when our arms brushed and I'm sure he felt it too. I could see it in his eyes. There was a fire in there. I so wanted him to act upon it.

But the moment passed and it wasn't too much longer before we were done cleaning up. I dried my hands and stood by the breakfast bar while he continued to tidy the kitchen.

"I wanted to apologize," he said suddenly as he put a wiped down the countertop.

I blinked. We'd not said a word to each other in so long it was weird to be hearing his voice again. "What for?"

"For what happened in the car," he said. "I know it's a hard thing for you to talk about that with what happened at Lakeshore, and I'm sorry if it upset you or made you feel uncomfortable. We shouldn't have even been talking about it really. Lesander can be quite the gossip."

"That's not why I was upset," I said quietly, pulling my gaze away from him.

"What was it?"

I sighed. "When Lakeshore was attacked, no one came to help us, no one sent aid or anything. It wasn't like Duskfall, nobody died, we just ended up with a whole lot of casualties and the medical bills stacked up." I looked up at him, his mouth in an "oh" shape as he stared back. He seemed to understand where this was going. I could feel myself getting more and more riled up. "The whole reason I sold myself in the first place was to pay for that. There were so many people who were probably going to die if they didn't get care and they didn't have the right insurance to cover it and even the ones that did had so much excess stuff to pay for, it was insane. And to sit there and hear you and Lesander talking about hiding and running away from it made me feel sick."

"Owen-"

"It was awful to hear and I couldn't believe that I was hearing that an alpha was running scared. I wanted to jump out of the car and run away." I stopped talking and gave myself a moment to catch my breath.

Dante stepped towards me. He was completely quiet and I was preparing to be torn down by him, torn apart. But he stopped and put his hands on my shoulders, just as he had done last night. And again, he tucked under my chin and lifted my face so he was looking right at me.

"I'm..." he hesitated, like he wasn't fully sure what to say or how to say it. "I'm so sorry, Owen." His eyes looked wet, which only made me feel even more confused. "I'm sorry you've had to go through that and I'm-"

I shook his hands off and backed away. "This is not how this is supposed to go."

"What are you talking about?"

"For fucks sake, Dante, you're supposed to be putting me in my place not letting me school you on what's right and wrong."

"I'm so confused right now, what the hell do you want from me?"

"I just... I don't... I want you to be a fucking alpha okay?"

I stormed away, back down the hallway, slamming the bedroom door behind me. I hated it here. I wanted to go home.