"Hey. You okay?" My sister sat across from me at the kitchen table, half-eaten cookies strewn across the table in front of us.

"No. I already told you that I don't want to talk about this," I barked and hated myself for being hostile with her. She was my best friend. I gripped my face and let out another frustrating growl. "Why would Momma do this to me?"

"Because she thinks that she's protecting you, Jeremy. That is the only reasonable answer." She reached across and tugged my hands down. "She's not a monster. She's a good mom. A little cray-cray at times, but still, a really good mom."

I nodded, feeling like shit for being so ugly to her. "I know, but what the fuck?" I stood up and paced the floor. "Why would she attack Bailey like that?"

"You don't know what was said."

I whipped around and slammed my hands on the table. "Don't you dare take up for her right now."

My sister leaned back in her chair. "Don't yell at me. We're going to fix this. Just because Mom fucked things up does not mean the last word has been spoken. Give Bailey a day to chill out and call her. Go over there. Talk to her."

"I'm going tonight after I get Austin in bed." I walked over to the window as Nina's phone rang.

"Hello? Yeah, we're still over here at Jeremy's, Mom."

I turned around and crossed my arms over my chest as my sister glanced up at me.

"Okay. I'm glad you got to see her. Yeah, sure. We'll head over there now. Love you too." She put the phone down and stood up. "She talked to Bailey and apologized. Everything is going to be fine. She's cooking Christmas dinner and wants us there. Now."

"I'm not going until I know that she fixed this shit with my girlfriend." I walked around Nina and tried to storm into the hallway.

She grabbed my arm and pulled me back. "You are going because your son and your sister deserve a fucking Christmas, which includes dinner at Mom’s house. Get your boots and your jacket and meet us in the car. She said she fixed it. She fixed it."

I wanted to bark at her again, but she was right. And I was being a dick. Big time.

"Fine. I'll be there in a second." I pulled out of her hold carefully and walked to my room. After closing the door, I got dressed and checked my phone. Nothing from Bailey. If mother had fixed everything, why the hell wasn't my girl calling me? I'd done nothing wrong. I was moving on with my life, letting go of my grief and taking steps forward for her. Just because my mother was batshit crazy didn't mean that I was.

I finished getting myself together and grabbed a baseball cap on the way out. There was no way I was fixing my hair or doing anything that my mother expected me to do. It was a proverbial finger in the air, and we would both know it.

"Hi, Daddy! You feeling better?" Austin leaned forward from the backseat and gripped my arm.

"Yeah, buddy. Sorry about that. Just a little misunderstanding with Granny. We're all good now." I buckled up and checked my phone as it dinged. I prayed like hell it was Bailey. Nope. Mayhem. "Hey. I need to run by the station before we head to Mom’s."

My sister gave me a look. "Why?"

"The guys have something for me. It won't take more than a few seconds, I promise."

"You're not fighting another fire today, right, Dad?" Austin smiled as I turned to look at him in the backseat.

"Nope. I hope not." I winked and turned to my sister, who was in the driver's seat. "Ten minutes top."

"Alright. Sure." She pulled out of the driveway and drove toward the station.

I let my thoughts slip back to my date with Bailey a few weeks back. It was my favorite date thus far. We'd opened up in our conversation and talked about some of the deeper things in our lives, joked around the art gallery while all the stiffs in suits gave us dirty looks. We made fun of the stiffs, and ice skated until our thighs hurt. I made love to her all night long and held her tucked against me until the sun came up that next morning.

It was the kind of life I wanted to live every day, and it was so fucking close to being mine.

"I'm so scared I'm going to lose her." I kept my voice low and watched the snow drift by the car.

"You're not. I promise. I'll do anything I can to help make sure that doesn't happen." My sister squeezed my arm. "She loves you, Jeremy. It's going to take more than Mom acting up to push her away. Laila didn't run when Mom got nutty with her."

"Yeah, but Mom wasn't nearly as bad as she is now." I unbuckled as we got to the station. "I'll be right back guys."

"Hurry! I'm hungry," Austin said.

"You bet, buddy. Five minutes tops." I shut the door and jogged to the station. If was fucking freezing outside, and the snow seemed to be falling in blankets instead of cute little flakes. I walked in to hear the guys all laughing in the kitchen area. I walked that way and couldn't help but smile as they all called out to me. It was a warm welcome.

"Captain. You lazy mother fucker." Mayhem walked over and pulled me into a quick hug. "We've been missing you, man. What's up?"

"Just trying to give the little guy a Christmas." I shrugged and went around to shake everyone's hand.

"Well, we won't keep you here with us." He handed me a present in the shape of a clothing box.

"What's this?" I glanced down at it.

"A present?" Mayhem asked with his eyebrow raised, like we were all dumbasses, me especially.

"Fuck you too." I smiled and tore into it. I almost had the box opened when he stopped me.

"Wait. Chuck, tell Jeremy why we got him this just in case he forgot." Mayhem lifted his hands and laughed.

"Dude. You remember that crazy chick with black hair that your mother set you up with right after Laila died? The one we never thought we were going to get rid of?" Chuck smiled, and all the guys started to laugh loudly.

"The one that called me Captain Hotness all the time?" I lifted my eyebrow.

"That's the one!" Mayhem laughed and shook his head. "She brought brownies in here yesterday, for you of course, and we ate every damn one of them."

"And all of us got the shits." Chuck held his stomach as he laughed until his face turned red.

I laughed along with them. "Oh hell. She tried to give me the shits?"

"Open the box man, but yeah... that bitch tried to give you some EXLAX brownies, and we thought we were being smooth by eating your treats." He shook his head. "That's what we get, I guess."

"Idiots." I pulled out a bright orange hoodie and lifted it up. Captain Hotness was stitched across the front of it in big black lettering. "Brother."

The guys cracked up again, and I was rather glad they'd gotten the shits from eating my brownies. The asshats deserved it.

"Alright. I gotta get over to my mother’s. Very funny." I tossed the box and the sweater in my office and jogged back out to the car. I got in and reached for the heater. "They're stupid. That was a waste of time."

"They just wanted to see you." Nina smiled and pulled out onto the street. "What did they get you?"

I explained in a PG way, and she and Austin both had a good laugh on the way over to my mom's house. By the time we got there, I felt much better. I wasn't ready to get out of the car and attack anyone. I was looking for ways to make things right. I'd apologize to my mother and hear her out, have dinner with the family and then go looking for Bailey. I wanted resolution. Now.

"I love Granny's pineapples and ham!" Austin yelled from the backseat and bounded out into the snow, leaving his door open.

"Hey. Your door," I called after him, but he kept running for the house.

My mom opened the door and picked him up, swinging him around as Nina, and I got the rest of the presents out of the trunk, closed up the car and walked into the scent of Christmas Day.

I breathed in deeply and turned as my mom reached out and grabbed my arms. "I'm so sorry, Jeremy. I was trying to protect you, but you don't need me to do that anymore. I just can't get past the fact that you're going to be okay without me, and that you will heal from Laila."

I nodded. "I'm sorry too." I pulled her close and bit my tongue. I wanted to ask if she really went to see Bailey, but as soon as I turned the corner, the question was null and void.

Bailey was wrapped up in my mom's favorite blanket with Austin on her lap and a Christmas storybook in her lap. He was bouncing around, and she was laughing as she kissed the side of his face.

"Thank God," I whispered as I moved into the room and knelt beside her. "You scared me so bad." I leaned down, cupped her face and kissed her several times as Austin moved off her lap.

"Come on, Austin. Let's put whipped cream on our hot chocolate. Granny needs your help." My mom and Nina left the living room, and I stood, half-dragging Bailey with me.

"Jeremy. I just-"

"Hush." I leaned down and kissed her again as I wrapped my arms around her and pinned her to my chest. I made sweet love to her mouth as I memorized the softness of her lips and drank in the taste of chocolate and cherries on her tongue. By the time we pulled back, we were both breathless, our cheeks pink.

"Wow." I kissed her again and pressed my forehead to hers. "I don't know what happened with my mom last night-"

"It doesn't matter. We worked it out." She moved back and ran her hands up my chest to cup my neck. "I'm sorry I left a note."

"No, baby. I'm sorry she upset you. When I got up this morning, and you weren't there," I paused to take a shaky breath, "I thought maybe I'd lost you. I don't want to feel that way ever again until we're old and have had our fucking fortieth wedding anniversary. You hear me?"

She tilted her head and lifted an eyebrow. "Fortieth anniversary?"

"Long story, but I want this thing between us. I want you to have my babies, Bailey. I want your shit all over my house; your warm, sexy, little body pressed to mine at night." I pulled her in for another long kiss as I ran my hands over her back to her ass and squeezed tightly. "Don't leave me again. I don't want to live my life worried that I'm being set up for another loss. I can't handle that."

"I want that too. So badly." She wrapped herself around me and let out a soft sigh. "I'd never leave you, Jeremy. Not ever. You're all I've ever wanted in my life."

I moved back and forced her to look up at me. "Good, because you're stuck. I love you like a fat kid loves chocolate cake."

"I love you like a stripper loves a poll."

"I love you like-" I started, but my sister cut me off.

"Oh God. Get off it already. The hot chocolate is cooling." She shook her head and walked back to the kitchen, mumbling under her breath, ‘like whipped cream love a cuppa hot chocolate.’

"Oh!" I laughed and pulled Bailey into my arms again. "I'm going to ask you to be my wife pretty soon. Did you know that? I don't wanna wait."

"And I'm going to say yes. I don't want another day without you."

"Such a good girl." I leaned down and nipped at her lips.

"All yours, Captain Hotness." She laughed as I chased her into the kitchen.

"Wait. Where did you hear about that crazy lune from?" I glanced between Nina, my mom, and Bailey. How the fuck did Bailey know the Captain Hotness story?

"Wasn't me." My mom shrugged and turned.

"No clue." My sister smiled and went back to working on drinks.

"Who wants some hot chocolate?" Bailey asked, and everyone busted out laughing - but me.

"Austin? Save me from too many women in my life." I walked back into the living room looking for the little man.

"Nope. Not me, Daddy. I'm thinking I'm going to wait until I see evidence and then I'll help."

"Evidence of what?" I knelt beside him with confusion on my face.

"Of girls sloughing off their cooties skin. Until then? You're on your own."

I laughed until my sides hurt. Life couldn't be better, and though I'd lost so much over the short number of years that I drew air into my lungs, I had gained so much too.

Nothing would ever be the same, but it would be just as good.

Just as good, in a different way.