My principles carry me as far as my own apartment. As soon as I close the door behind me, I lift my hand to my face and breathe in the scent of Meadow on my fingers.

Fuck. I deserve a medal for not fucking her tonight.

But she has to work in the morning—which means leaving at five. I’m not selfishly robbing her sleep because I want to get inside her body.

We’re going to take some time. Do this right. Talk more, kiss more, and when we have all the time in the world, we’ll take it to the next level.

“I’ve wanted to use you as a sex toy for six months.”

My cock throbs as Meadow’s words ring in my ears. There’s so much about this woman I still need to discover so we can do this right. This. I don’t even know what it is, but I know it’s different. I want a relationship with Meadow—what we already have, plus kinky sex. I want to tie her up, hold her down, make her scream.

I usually date inside the kink-familiar pool of Ottawa submissives. Kink first, chemistry second. And honestly, until Meadow bounced into my bar, I didn’t care that much about chemistry. A good scene could work with anyone. Negotiate, do the thing, mutually get off, and be done with it. Rinse and repeat until it got boring.

Maybe I missed an opportunity tonight to explain that to Meadow. All those women were basically friends with benefits. Bondage benefits, discipline benefits…

But does she need to know that level of detail about my past when maybe it doesn’t matter for her? Because with Meadow, it’s all chemistry. I’m not thinking about scenes. I’m thinking about skin and moans, sleepy fucking and naked cuddling.

I lean back against the door and palm my cock through my jeans. Cuddling that might lead to wrestling. Pinning her down and forcing her legs open. Sweet, pale thighs. Dark red curls and pink, wet skin.

A hand on her arm, another on her leg. Dragging my cock through her slick folds. Whispering all sorts of filthy threats.

Her eyes, bright. Challenging. Her mouth just as dirty as mine.

That was the best surprise of tonight. Meadow isn’t meek in the least. She wants things.

I shudder as I squeeze the aching crown of my dick.

Fuck.

Flipping off the lights, I unzip my jeans and throw myself onto my couch. It doesn’t take long. A few rough jerks, then a faster stroke. Meadow’s words rocketing around in my brain.

My dirty, sweet, good little one.

I’m going to make the next week so good for her. Waiting will be delicious.

But Meadow doesn’t come home the next night. She’s on a twenty-four hour shift at the hospital and sticking close there, she says in a text.

Then she sends me a follow-up cartoon image of a woman wiggling out of her panties.

Surgery also interferes with me telling her about my secret after-dark brand. And when she comes home the next day it’s to sleep. By the time she wakes up, I’m behind the bar.

That doesn’t stop me from kissing her. I drag her behind the bar and hold her close, savouring the feel of her body in my arms, her lips against mine. And when she cheerily perches on a stool across from me, I make a silent pledge to hire a part-time bartender so I can make time for her in the evenings after long shifts like that.

The rest of the week speeds by in a blur of kisses and missed conversations, because Meadow’s schedule is insane.

And one of Tessa’s baristas answers my job ad for the bartender gig, opening up three nights a week for me to be a good boyfriend. He starts the night before Halloween, and I use my newfound freedom to do even more work.

Tessa and I do a dress rehearsal of the street shut-down. Even without volunteers, we do a full roll-out in an hour, which is great.

“I had no doubt,” she says when I walk her back to the bakery. “My Tarot card reading today was excellent.”

“Cool.”

She gives me a look like she’s going to offer a reading, and I don’t know if it’s because of calendar, or what’s going on with Meadow, but a part of me would take it.

Except she doesn’t offer, so I mooch an end-of-day muffin off her and head back to the bar. I’m glad the new guy is serving drinks tonight because I’m not in a public mood.

I’m in a Meadow kind of mood, but she’s working all night. She’ll get off at seven tomorrow morning, sleep all day, and be good to go for the party.

She sends a selfie with the pizza slice, and it is sexy. Her hair is messy and her eyes are bright.

I slouch back in my chair and turn on my camera. At the last second I drop my hand into my lap, my fingers surrounding the thick shape of my cock through my jeans.

She likes it.

I grin at the screen.