Chapter Twelve
Tim awoke from a nightmare about a pair of aliens chasing him through the woods. They were of the vintage variety, cheesy silver costumes and antennae on their heads, green faces. Ridiculous looking. Yet in the dream, he’d been terrified.
Sitting up in bed, he rubbed his eyes. Tyler was asleep in shadows beside him. The room was dark but for a small lamp on the desk across the room. He could see no windows so it was impossible to tell what time it was, but he could hear rain and the soft rumble of thunder. Checking his phone, he saw it was just after three in the morning. Sighing, he eased back down into the pillow.
Beside him, Tyler shifted and rolled onto his back. His hand crept over and held Tim’s.
“You awake?” Tim whispered.
“Yeah.” Tyler rubbed his nose with his other hand. “Told you, I don’t sleep much. Sounds like a spring thunderstorm out there.”
“Did that wake you or did I? Sorry. Had a dream.”
Tyler sat up, looking at Tim through puffy eyes. “Was it bad?”
“Shouldn’t have been. It was about these stupid aliens that looked like something from an old TV show. But they were chasing me and I was fucking terrified.”
“Oh, I know all about that. Waking up from dreams that should have been nothing but being scared to fucking death.” Tyler twisted and leaned over the edge of the mattress, digging through his bag on the floor. He then sat cross-legged with the sheet draped over his knees and began rolling a joint.
Tim sat up as well. “You planning to medicate me?”
“Couldn’t hurt.” He smiled at Tim. “You think the nightmare came from worrying about what’s going on? Up on the mountain? What happened yesterday?”
“I don’t know.” Tim rubbed his eyes “Maybe. Probably.”
“We got one of the drones that was stalking you. Those assholes as you call them, two of which are sleeping upstairs? They’re gonna figure this out. And my bet is they’ll do it quick, especially with Baz helping out. So try not to worry. You’ll have your life back.”
Tim’s stomach dropped as something occurred to him. He believed Tyler about the guys, that this weird scary problem would get resolved. But then Tyler wouldn’t be needed here in the village anymore. What would that mean for them? They’d grown so close so fast. But it was more than that. This wasn’t just a fling, this was...something. A big something for Tim. But huge as it was, he didn’t feel on solid footing enough to start asking about the future, and if they even had one. Solid footing? Ha. Felt more like quicksand, and any wrong move...
“What are you thinking about?”
Tim looked up to see Tyler scowling at him. “Nothing.”
“Nothing, huh? Your expression says otherwise.”
“I have a really good time with you, Tyler.”
Tyler stared at him, expression unreadable. “I have a good time with you too.”
“Do you think it’s more than just great sex?”
“You asked me that before. I said yes.”
“You’re right. I just...felt that thing again, so I had to say it.”
“I imagine it’s probably difficult to trust what I say.” Tyler shrugged. “Since I don’t say all that much.”
“Which is why I should be grateful for what you do say, and not try to push you further than you’re comfortable with.”
“Don’t worry about it. You had a bad dream. You’re feeling vulnerable, so you’re redirecting that into something else.”
“Oh, am I?”
“Yeah. I think so.”
Tim tried not to take it as a dismissal. “It was weird. I never have scary dreams.”
Tyler slid back and leaned against the pillows, then lit the joint and handed it to Tim. “This will help. I’m sure your dreams are out of the ordinary because your life’s been out of the ordinary lately. But if the nightmares continue, let me know. There are ways of controlling them.”
Tim took a puff then handed the joint back to Tyler. “You’re telling me you know how to control your dreams?”
He nodded. “I teach classes on mind-control at headquarters. Much of it focuses on controlling dreams. Lucid dreaming. You heard of it?”
“It’s like...being half awake while you dream or something?”
“Not exactly. It’s about training yourself to know when you’re dreaming. By creating a trigger. For me, it’s looking at my hands. Do that within the dream and you can manipulate it. Change it if it’s a bad one. Or simply force yourself to wake up if need be.”
“And you can do that?”
“Yes.”
“How did you learn?”
Tyler’s soft expression hardened a bit. “The Greys use a form of mind-control that taps into the same part of your brain that controls dreams. If you can learn to get control of your sleeping mind, that dream state, you can fight the mind-control. That’s what I figured out. That’s how I was able to fight back against them. And that’s why Ogden has me teach classes now.”
Tim went still. He accepted the joint from Tyler’s outstretched hand but stayed silent.
“You don’t have to do that,” Tyler said.
“Do what?”
“Go all wide-eyed and freaky when I talk about it. Unless it bothers you. If so, I won’t mention it again.”
“No, it’s not that. It’s just that it’s huge, Tyler, and a source of pain for you so even though I’m dying to ask questions I’m also shitting myself because I don’t want to say the wrong thing.”
“I know.” Tyler shrugged, then took the joint back from Tim and pinched it off with his thumb and forefinger. “I figured that was it. But I’m the one putting this out there right now. And I trust you.”
“You do?” Tim smiled.
Laughing, Tyler nodded. “Yeah. That makes you happy?”
“Totally.”
“I only brought it up because of your nightmare. But you can ask what you want, within reason.”
Tim jumped in at the prompt, recognizing this was an important moment. Tyler was allowing him to step over one of his red lines. That trust was not to be taken lightly, so he reminded himself to proceed with caution, despite his blazing curiosity. “You’re saying at first you didn’t know it was happening? With the Greys?”
“Not at first. They have the ability to put you in a dream state to control you, but it’s more than that. They go deep. Almost like being under anesthesia it’s so powerful.”
“Shit. That must have been tough to break through.”
“Oh yes. Took a long time to get there. And a long time to even validate it was happening, because they can also screw with your memories. So even if you have a feeling something bad happened while you slept, you can’t pinpoint what it was exactly. They overlay it with false memories. The Greys are the ultimate mind-fuckers.”
“So how did you figure out finally that it was happening? That you were...being taken. Had you already been studying lucid dreaming?”
“No. I began studying it because of the Greys, I just didn’t know at first they were the ones causing my nightmares. Well, they didn’t start out as nightmares. They started as just normal dreams. Well, not normal but not menacing. Christ, I forgot how hard this is to explain. Haven’t talked about it in so long.”
Tim reached for the joint, and Tyler chuckled when he lit it up again, inhaling deeply.
“I think someone’s starting to like the SGW,” Tyler said.
Blowing a funnel of smoke out, Tim nodded, feeling that unique calm come over him, like the first day he smoked in preparation for seeing Baz. “I really want you to keep talking. I want to hear about the dreams. And I want us both calm for this conversation.” He handed the joint to Tyler. “Tell me.”
Tyler stared at Tim as he took a hit and blew it out. “You sure you want this in your head? You did just have nightmares about aliens after all.”
“You can’t have many people to talk to about it.”
“No. I don’t.”
“And you don’t mind? Talking about it?”
“With you? To a point I don’t mind. But to be blunt...this is some scary shit. I’ve been able to numb myself to it with work over the years. But you’re not...you’re...”
“I’m ignorant and naïve when it comes to this stuff,” Tim said. “You’re worried about me. You don’t have to be.”
“But I care about you,” Tyler said softly. “I have to live with this shit in my head but you shouldn’t have to.”
“Tyler...” He wanted to say something but wasn’t sure if this was the time. If saying it would make Tyler want to open up to him, or if it would make him shut down.
“What?” Tyler scowled as he pinched off what was left of the joint and set it aside. “Say what you were gonna say.”
“I want to respect your boundaries. But everything I learn about you makes me want to know more. Not because it’s weird or scary. This isn’t some perverse curiosity about the subject matter. I want to know because it’s part of you. And I’ve never felt this way about a person before, but I have this aching to get closer to you.”
He hadn’t managed to finish the sentence without heat flushing his face, but shit, at least he’d gotten the words out. He felt both brave and regretful as he awaited Tyler’s response.
His gamble seemed to have paid off, because Tyler visibly relaxed, easing back into the pillows. “I feel that way about you, you know. Want to know more about you.”
Tim laughed. “Sadly, there isn’t that much to know about me.”
“I bet there is,” Tyler said. “Maybe before I leave you can take me out in the village. Show me your version of it. What you love about this place.”
Tim smiled, but the before I leave was like a glass of ice-water thrown in his face. “Yeah, okay. We can make that happen. But I still want to hear about you. About the dreams and...everything. I really do. If you’re comfortable telling me.”
“Okay.” Stretching his arms over his head, Tyler sighed, then dropped his hands on his lap. “I was fifteen when the sleep problems started. Once a month or so I’d wake up terrified. Literally in a cold sweat, feeling like I’d been through something horrifying. But I’d have a perfect memory of my last dream before waking and it was always something benign. Bunch of cats I was playing with. Or walking through a pet shop looking at birds in cages. Nothing that should have caused that fear. Fear that made me vomit a few times.”
“Jesus,” Tim said before he could stop himself. “I’m sorry, continue.”
“I went to a sleep clinic but they couldn’t help me. Started doing my own research. That’s when I learned about lucid dreaming. I figured if I could learn to control my dreams, maybe I could fix this. If I could change one or two things within my mind while I was dreaming, maybe I could shift it in another direction, enough to stop waking up like that.”
“You learned to do it?”
“Yeah. Took a while, but I did. For a time, I didn’t have any nightmares. Well, I had a few but they felt...normal. None of that fear I’d experienced upon waking. Regular dreams too, I was able to manipulate them, change the storyline. Got good enough at it to wake myself up when I wanted, which was great. Then...” Cracking his knuckles, Tyler’s jaw tightened.
“Something happened,” Tim said.
“You could say that.” Tyler nodded. “I remember that night clearly. I remember the dream I was having. Lying in a field of grass, there were four kittens moving around my body. Just walking circles around me, occasionally stopping to sniff me or just play with me. I was laughing. Fucking laughing in the dream. Then I looked at my hands—my lucid dreaming trigger.”
Tim’s pulse quickened. “Did you wake yourself up?”
“Yes.”
Tim rested his palm on Tyler’s knee. “And?”
“I wasn’t at home in my bed. I was in a dimly lit room, on a table. Like a surgical suite, but weird. The walls and ceiling were strange, sloped and curved, odd writing and colored lights embedded everywhere. And it wasn’t four kittens moving around me. It was four Greys.”
“Fuck,” Tim whispered. “That must have been—”
“Terrifying, yeah, because I knew I was awake. I knew I wasn’t dreaming anymore. I tried to move but couldn’t. I’d broken their mind-control, but that part of your body that paralyzes you when you sleep? So you don’t get up and run around, say if you’re dreaming about running? That part was still intact. I couldn’t move. Couldn’t speak. But I was aware.”
“Did they know? That you were awake?”
“Not that time. My eyes were open, and I was breathing really hard, but they just kept on with...what they were doing. They didn’t seem worried.”
There was no way Tim would ask him exactly what the Greys were doing. He could only try not to make this harder on Tyler. “You said they didn’t know you were awake that time. So things changed?”
“Yes. I gradually learned more control over my body during these episodes. But it happened slowly. I was abducted again over the next year, several times. It was awful. Painful and violating, the things they did to my body. But I didn’t want them to know I was aware. I used that time. Used the pain to wake my body up. To bring my body out of the dream state, along with my mind. Eventually I found I could move things. Fingers. Toes. But it wasn’t enough. Not yet.”
“But ultimately you got your body control back? Completely?”
“Yeah. But it got difficult to pretend, because they could manipulate that too. How much control I had over my physical body. Sometimes they walked me around their ship and showed me things, confident I wouldn’t remember I guess. I must have shown too much reaction, because they realized eventually that I was awake, so they tried to soothe me.”
“Soothe you how?”
“Putting thoughts in my head. That everything was all right. That I wasn’t in danger. That they wouldn’t hurt me. That they only needed to study me because I was...perfect.” He shuddered.
Tim recalled that moment at his house, the intimate moment on the couch when he’d called Tyler perfect. And Tyler ordered him never to say that word. “But they did hurt you?” He winced, hating this, but wanting to know more.
“Well, once I was awake, yeah, I felt pain. See the dream state, that’s how they controlled the pain too. Like a drug. They thought I couldn’t feel anything. They didn’t know I’d been practicing. They didn’t know exactly how awake I was. They tried to overlay my thoughts with false images when they were done with me. Like the kittens. Birds and puppies and shit. I let them think it worked.”
“Tyler, I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”
“Please don’t pity me. Just let me finish.”
“Okay, I’m sor...I mean, go on.”
“I found a surgeon to remove the implants they’d put in me. I think up until that point, they’d believed they were successful in wiping my memory before they dropped me through the roof of my house back into my bed. But that last time, when they abducted me, that final time...”
“It’s okay.” Tim squeezed his knee. “You’re safe. Tell me what happened.”
“I was stupid. I thought they wouldn’t find me without the implants. And maybe they couldn’t, because I’d traveled to find that surgeon. Was gone a few weeks, with no problems. But of course they fucking knew where I lived, and eventually I had to go home. I had nowhere else to go. I’d taken off for weeks at a time before, so I wasn’t sure if my parents were even looking for me. But I didn’t wake them up when I got home late that night. Just went up to my room and went to sleep. Decided I’d deal with my parents in the morning. But I didn’t get to. Because I didn’t get to wake up in my bed the next morning.”
Shivering, Tim shook his head. “You got abducted that night?”
“Yeah.” Tyler stared down at his hands. “First night back. The Greys took me, right out of my house as usual. They figured out pretty quick that the implants they’d put in me were gone. Then the shit hit the fan. I think they panicked.”
“What did...what did they do?”
“They physically strapped me down. They’d never done that before. I’d screwed myself. I knew this was my final chance to really fight back. Because if they’d decided I needed to be restrained, they’d likely always restrain me from here on, when they abducted me again.”
“What did you do?”
“I didn’t fight when they strapped me down. I made my eyes blank. I pretended to be paralyzed. To be out of it. To be asleep.”
“Did it work?”
“Yes. I made it work. While I was strapped down they put some new implants in me. It was the biggest challenge of my life not to react to the pain of what they were doing. But I managed to use my mind to focus on other thoughts and shut out the pain. Because I had to. It must have convinced them I was really out of it. Once they were done with me, they released my restraints.”
“They did?”
“Yeah. That’s when I knew they bought my sleeping act, probably because I didn’t react to the pain. I knew they bought it because once they released the restraints they were just...doing their thing, shuffling around and cleaning up and shit, like they always did before getting ready to drop me back at home. The adrenaline from fighting not to react to the surgical pain had me so pumped up, I was able to...I had full control of my body. Not just control. I was strong.” A breath whistled out of him. “Strong enough to do what I had to do.” He looked at Tim. “I took care of them.”
Tim’s lips tightened. He knew this part of the story because Nolan told him. “You incapacitated them?”
“You could say that.” Tyler looked down. “I killed them. All four of them.”
Tim didn’t want him to feel a moment of regret. Or of thinking Tim disapproved of his measures. “Good.”
Glancing up, Tyler raised his eyebrows.
“I’m glad you killed them,” Tim said. “They deserved to die.”
“Yeah. I know. I don’t regret it.”
“Good. What happened after?”
Tyler’s eyes became distant, and he was silent for a long time. Tim suspected there were memories he wouldn’t share, and that was fine.
“You don’t have to tell me,” Tim said. “You’ve said so much already.”
“In the end I took the craft down,” he said. “Crashed it.”
“You could have died,” Tim said softly.
“Didn’t care. I was running on pure adrenaline. I just wanted to destroy everything. Everything they did. Everything that represented them. Even if I had to be part of that destruction.”
“I’m really glad you didn’t die.”
Tyler laughed hard and Tim was relieved to hear the genuineness of it. “You’re glad I didn’t die. Thank you. That’s almost better than my ‘You don’t repulse me’ compliment.”
“Yes.” Tim’s own laughter felt like a stress bubble popping. “Such sweet things we say to each other.”
“Seriously though,” Tyler said. “I didn’t tell you this to make you feel bad for me.”
“I know.”
“But without telling you this, you’d never understand the gravity of it when I told you that I can control my dreams. But I really can. And you can learn to do it too, over time. If you need to.”
Tim nodded, understanding that as weird as this conversation was, it was once again about Tyler wanting to make sure Tim was all right. All because he had a stupid dream about bad science fiction movie aliens. Tyler wanted to soothe him, and thusly, shared this deeply personal and painful account. Or maybe Tyler wanted Tim to hear it regardless. Maybe he wanted them to get closer too.
Tim reached over and grabbed Tyler’s hand. “So you still do that? Control your dreams?”
“Yes. Not only that, I’ve expanded on it to study mind-control in other species. I’ve taught it to countless students and soldiers in my role under Ogden at headquarters. And I still practice it frequently to keep my skills sharp. And yet...”
“Yet? What?”
Tyler’s shy smile appeared, and a blush climbed his neck.
“What?” Tim laughed. “What’s that face for?”
“Over the past year while I’ve been away from the village, I’ve been dreaming of you.”
“Of me?” Tim couldn’t stop the smile spreading across his face. “You dreamed of me while you were away?”
“Yeah. And I tried to stop. I tried really hard.”
“Oh, thanks a lot!” Tim laughed.
“No, not because of anything bad really.” Tyler chuckled. “I was feeling guilty, like I told you, about what happened. Didn’t seem right to be dreaming about you, especially since some of the dreams were...” He glanced at Tim. “Sexual.”
“Go on. This is getting juicy.”
Shaking his head, Tyler rolled his eyes. “I tried to redirect the dreams. To toss you out. But for some reason no matter what I did you wouldn’t stay out. You just kept...popping right back in, like you belonged there.”
Stunned, Tim didn’t know what to say, but his stomach flipped pleasantly. “Oh.”
Smirking, Tyler mimicked him. “Oh.”
“I mean...” Tim smiled. “Really?”
“Yeah, really. Do you know...do you understand why I’m telling you this now?”
Tim hesitated, confused. “Not exactly. Why?”
“You’ve asked me twice if this is just sex. So I hope this finally answers that question without a doubt. I’m an expert at controlling every corner of my mind. But I couldn’t control dreaming about you. You’re in my head, Tim. You have been for a long time.”
Lifting the sheet, Tim slid over. Resting his head on Tyler’s shoulder, he whispered, “You’re in my head too.”
“I know.”
Smiling, Tim looked up. “Am I that transparent?”
Leaning down, Tyler kissed him. It was a soft, lingering kiss, and it made Tim swoon. When their lips parted, Tyler had that frown of concentration pinching his brows. “You should know that personal relationships are what I have the least experience in. That’s not hyperbole.”
Tim nodded. “I know.”
“You think you can sleep? Still a couple hours ‘til morning.”
“I think so.”
Tyler rolled over and pressed his back into Tim’s chest. Apparently this conversation was over. It was like Tyler only had so much energy to expend on emotional conversation, and once he was done, he was done.
Tim held him close, sighing. He had to remember that this sudden quiet was a part of Tyler as well, and he had to accept that. Tim couldn’t expect constant reassurance, or even constant affection. It seemed in Tyler’s mind, he’d said what he had to say, and Tim should accept it as given and carry on, even during those long bouts of silence. It clearly took more effort for someone like Tyler to speak his truths, so Tim would do his best to be patient.
His dick stirred where it rested against Tyler’s hot skin. But he did nothing about it, didn’t try to get amorous. Hearing Tyler’s breathing go soft and even as he fell asleep was satisfaction enough.
He trusts me.
A profound compliment and an awesome responsibility. One Tim had to try extra hard not to fuck up. Because unlike Tyler, Tim was experienced with personal relationships, and they’d always been smooth sailing for a short time until they ultimately crashed into a wall. But this was different, because he was voluntarily diving into waters he already knew were choppy. Caught in Tyler’s turbulent wake, he was sure it was going to be a bumpy ride.
Snuggling closer to Tyler’s warm body, he held on tight.
****
“WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!”
Jolted from a sound sleep, Tim rolled out of bed and dropped onto the floor. Myles stood before the bed in his sheriff’s uniform, holding a megaphone and laughing. “What the fuck, Murph?”
“Good morning, Timothy.”
“You fucking...” Tim snatched the sheet off the mattress to cover his naked body, then climbed back onto the bed. “You fucking asshole, what are you doing?”
“Elliot told me to wake you up.”
“And you couldn’t do so gently?”
“Wouldn’t have been nearly as fun for me. That was quite an amusing sight.”
“I’m sure. You prick, I can’t believe you saw me naked.”
“I’ve seen you naked before.”
“Sure, when we were kids going skinny dipping. In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m a grownup now.”
“Relax, I wasn’t looking at your grownup junk.” Myles set the megaphone down and picked a mug up off the desk. He sat on the edge of the bed and handed it to Tim. “Here you go.”
“Wow. You brought me tea. This almost makes up for giving me heart failure.”
“Elliot was about to pour you coffee but I’m the only one who knew you preferred tea, so I made it happen.”
“Thanks.” He glanced at the ceiling and could now hear voices and laughter filtering down from above. He looked toward the bathroom, noticing the mirror was steamy. Tyler had already gotten up, showered, and left without Tim even stirring. Maybe he needed to lay off the SGW.
“Where is everyone?”
Myles smirked. “You mean where is Tyler?”
“Yes, that’s what I mean.”
“He’s upstairs. For a while he and Christian were going over a schematic of that animatronic thing from the lab.”
“Gator-worm?”
“Huh?”
“Drone thing that Tyler shot in the woods.”
“Yes. I couldn’t understand much of the blueprint they had, but apparently Baz confirmed last night the thing is made from hybrid technology. Can’t really make an argument anymore that the source is human.”
“So it’s likely some alien-hybrid is fucking with me.”
“Yeah. I’m sorry, Tim. I know how scary this shit can be. But Baz has gone full-throttle at the base. Apparently he’s got people going ship-to-ship, section-to-section looking for the source.”
“Hope he finds it. I’m fucking done with this shit.” Tim rubbed sleep out of his eyes. “Tyler’s been saying all along the source is alien in nature. There’ll be no living with him now.”
“Yes, well, he’s been focused on little else since I got here. When did he get up?”
“No idea, I was out for the count.”
“He’s in the movie room with JT now, going over last night’s camera footage from the mountain. Tyler doesn’t strike me as the type to sit still for very long.”
Tim chuckled. “He’s usually in work-mode.”
“He’s kind of...serious, isn’t he?”
“Not always. Not in bed.”
“Hmm.”
“Who else is here?”
“Let’s see, Nolan and Brett went to the lake early to do a dive and check on the sensors down there. Elliot and Christian are in the kitchen. There’s supposed to be a briefing when Brett and Nolan get back from the lake.”
“About?”
“They studied the animatronic thing overnight, Baz came by the lab too. But it’s gone now, Ogden sent a team to retrieve it. I’m sure we’ll find out more at the briefing.”
“The briefing. Suppose I’m just gonna stick around for that now that I slept so late.” Tim winced and sipped his tea. “I was hoping to be able to slip out early before anyone could see me.”
Myles laughed. “Sorry. In Singing Bear Village, the walk of shame comes to you. It’s after eight, you’re usually up by now, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, was up at three smoking weed after a nightmare, probably why I slept late.”
“You smoke weed now? Who are you?”
“I know, I’ve succumbed to peer pressure because of a cute boy. Shit, speaking of cute boys, I need to call Kip. Jesus, I haven’t even checked in.”
“Don’t worry about it. I talked to him this morning, everything’s fine in the forests of Singing Bear Village. Well...everything your work buddies know about anyway.”
“You called Kip? Really?”
“Told you, no privacy with this crew, but they take care of things. I was ordered to make sure your work situation was sorted. Kip thinks you and I are dealing with the state about very important regulatory shit, so act annoyed about it when you go back to work. But enough about that.” He lowered his voice. “What’s going on with Tyler?”
Tim smiled and shook his head. “You don’t get to interrogate me, Sheriff.”
“I most certainly do.” Narrowing his eyes, Myles leaned in close. “Spill.”
“Wow. You’re getting flecks of gray in your beard stubble. I don’t like that because we’re the same age.”
“You probably have gray too, just can’t see it because you’re blond.”
“I do not! Bite your tongue.”
Myles scratched his chin. “Yeah, living with Christian is aging me. So what’s going on with Tyler, damn it? You stayed here with him last night, obviously.”
“You wake me up with a megaphone, make me roll out of bed naked, and now you want details about my love life? What happened to privacy?”
“Have you not been listening? Privacy no longer exists for you.”
“Bullshit. I’ve managed to keep a private life, despite having to deal with the crew upstairs. And I plan to keep it that way.”
“Sure. Good job. Hope you’re not planning to continue dating Tyler then.”
Tim frowned. “Why?”
“Because, my friend, you date one of these guys? Kiss your privacy goodbye.”
“Oh, bullshit.”
“You into him?”
“Why does everyone feel entitled to ask me that question?”
“Because it matters,” Myles said. “I’m trying to tell you how it is and how it’s gonna be if you keep dating him.”
“How would you know?”
“Oh, honey.” Myles smiled. “He works for Ogden.”
“So does Christian, and you guys are fine.”
“Yes, Christian and I are fine. But I have people coming in and out of my house at all hours. Sometimes, if my sheriff’s position serves useful in whatever scheme they’ve got going, they’ll include me in the conversation. Other times, I’m lucky if I get a greeting before they go straight for Christian. Sometimes they just come through the front door of my house and walk around me like I’m a piece of furniture. If it’s work-related and they need to talk to my boyfriend? My privacy does not exist. And neither will yours if you date someone on Ogden’s team.”
Tim remained quiet, scowling into his tea cup.
“So I’ll ask you again. Are you into him?”
“Yes but what does it matter? It’s too new and delicate to start thinking big picture.”
“No, no.” Myles shook his head. “Now is the time to think about it. While it’s still new. Before you get in too deep and can’t get out.”
“Why are you being so cynical? Seriously. First guy I’ve really liked in years and you gotta go all gloom and doom on me.”
“I’m just trying to make sure you understand the changes that will happen to your life if you decide to make one of these guys your boyfriend.”
“My life’s been nothing but change the past year. This is just one more added thing.”
“Okay listen. You’ve always been kind of a rock star in the village. Ranger Tim Patterson. Handsome. Important. One of the faces for sure. Someone to know.”
“Gimme a fucking break. As if any of that even matters in a town this small.”
“I’m glad you feel that way, because it’s about to matter even less. If you keep dating Tyler, I mean. You date one of these guys? Ogden’s crew? Prepare to be a sidekick. You will never, ever be a rock star again. It’s not possible. Because they are the rock stars, and if you date one, you’re agreeing to play second fiddle, sometimes even servant to their cause.”
“Oh, come on! I’m no one’s servant.”
“Think I’m kidding? I was not prepared for how being Christian Boucher’s boyfriend would amend my life. But I was deep in it with Christian before I found out the truth. By then it was too late, I was already in love.”
“You saying you’d go back in time if you could? Never meet Christian?”
“Of course not, Christian’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m just saying, dating one of these guys is not easy. You take a backseat to them because they work for people who protect the fucking planet. That’s hard to compete with. And part of them is always gonna be owned by that, so you best be real fucking secure. Egos die on the battlefield here.”
“Thanks, Myles. Think maybe you can let me finish my tea before you suck all the joy out of my veins? I like this guy.”
“I’m glad you like him. I want you happy. But you’re my best friend, so I feel an obligation to make sure your eyes are fully open. It may seem thrilling right now, the part of him that involves his top-secret job and all. But the credits don’t roll when this mission is over. There’s always another one, the guys are always on call, and we don’t own them. Ogden does.”
Tim snorted. “I don’t want to own Tyler. I just want to be near him. As near as he’ll let me be.”
Myles’ head jerked back. “Shit. It’s already too late, isn’t it?”
“Will you stop talking like I’m turning into a zombie or something? I can handle things with Tyler. I’m not naïve about it. Even he’s given me the talk about his job, so have some faith I’m not about to dive into the deep end without my floaties on.”
“Okay, fine. You’re a big boy. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you. You hungry? Nolan made ham quiche and they saved you some.”
Tim groaned, rubbing his eyes. “Yeah, let me get cleaned up and dressed, then I’ll come upstairs. I’m already dreading Elliot harassing me about staying over with Tyler.”
“Elliot’s gonna Elliot.” He slapped Tim’s shoulder then stood. “See you in a few minutes. You want more tea?”
Tim handed him his mug. “You’re the best, you know that?”
“We trophy wives have to support each other.”
“Fuck off, we’re not trophy wives!” Tim laughed. “You’re the sheriff and I’m the forest ranger, we’re important, damn it!”
“Yeah.” Myles grinned and started for the door. “You keep telling yourself that.”
“Yeah, yeah. Get out of here.”
Tim took a quick shower in the basement bathroom, then dressed and headed upstairs. As soon as he walked into the kitchen Elliot pointed at him. “Slut!”
“Oh, shut up.”
Seated at the island, Christian snickered as he bit into a croissant. “Slut,” he said with his mouth full. “Whore.”
“You shut up too, Boucher.”
“Here. Eat.” Elliot slid a plate in front of him. “That’s your tea right there.”
“Thanks.”
Tim managed to get down two bites of quiche when Myles suddenly stepped into the kitchen. “Hey, guys? JT and Tyler need to show you something.”
“Oh, crap,” Elliot said. “What is it?”
“Something from last night’s footage.”
“Fuck,” Tim said. “What now?”
“Which camera?” Elliot asked.
“Not by the ranger station. From one of the cameras mounted on the trees near the field. Come on, you’d better see this for yourselves.”
Noting Myles’ grim tone and serious eyes, Tim pushed his plate away and got up. They all followed him out of the kitchen and up to the movie room.
Tyler and JT spoke quietly to each other near the front. On the big screen was a frozen image of the forest, gray light coming through the trees. “Okay, what’s happening?” Elliot asked. “More gator-worms?”
JT looked over. “Yeah.”
“Seriously? I was joking! They actually showed up again? On camera?”
“On camera,” JT said. “And on purpose.”
“What do you mean on purpose?” Tim asked.
“You’ll see.”
Tyler turned and looked at Tim. “Hey,” he said. “You’re up.”
“Yeah, I slept late.” He gave Tyler a shy smile, which he returned briefly before focusing on the screen. “When’s this footage from?”
“Just after dawn this morning,” Tyler said. “You guys are gonna fucking love this.”
“That’s sarcasm, in case anyone missed it,” Myles said. “Take a seat everyone.”
None of them sat, opting to stand before the screen, anxiety palpable in the room as JT hit play and the image came to life. A breeze blew some dead leaves around in the frame. Then something slid into view from the right. “Ah, shit,” Christian. “That thing’s fucking freaky.”
Tim watched as a gator-worm, identical to the one they’d taken from the woods, slithered in then slowly rose up. It rested on its tail, the belly and three sets of legs visible. Stretched upright, it looked like a giant insect. “What is it doing?” Tim asked.
“Watch its top left...hand,” JT said. “If you could call it a hand.”
The clawed appendage curled into a fist, then the creature stuck its middle finger up. “The fuck,” Christian whispered.
It remained that way for nearly a minute, appearing to flip the camera the bird. Then slowly, it sank into the earth, lower and lower until the head disappeared, and it was gone. “Did that thing flip off the camera? I mean...was that on purpose?” Tim asked.
“Seems so.” JT turned to Tim. “Looks like someone’s pretty pissed off that we took one of its toys away. And its letting us know.”
“Brazen motherfucker,” Elliot said. “Who the hell is behind this?”
“Someone with knowledge enough of humans to know what sticking its middle finger up means,” JT said. “I’m starting to wonder if this is a human being controlling these drones after all. Not an alien.”
“Nope,” Tyler said. “It’s probably a hybrid.”
“You just hate hybrids,” JT said.
“Yeah, with good reason. Hybrids have done some fucked up shit, and we’ve been in the line of fire. Even Baz has said their shitass DNA combo never should have happened.”
“I agree with Tyler,” Christian said. “What would a human being be doing down in the Whites’ underground base? The Whites would never allow that.”
“Well, this is bullshit,” Elliot said. “Whoever this fucker is, if they’re operating from the base then the Whites have an obligation to look into it and keep us informed.”
“Baz is working on it,” Myles said. “He’s informed the Whites. I’m sure we’ll know something soon.”
“Hey, guys?” Nolan strolled into the movie room, pink-cheeked and bright-eyed, dark hair hanging damp and loose around his chin. “We’re back. Got some news.”
“Husband!” Elliot smiled. “You didn’t drown in the lake. I’m so happy, get over here.”
“Can’t get rid of me that easy.” Nolan grabbed Elliot and lifted him off the ground, biting his neck. “Mmm, yummy.”
“Stop it,” JT said. “You guys are gross.”
“Yes, we are,” Elliot said. “But Nolan was up half the night at the lab examining a gator-worm so give us a break, we didn’t get to fuck last night.”
JT snickered. “Please don’t do it here. I love you both but there are some things I don’t want to see.”
“I do,” Christian said. “Can I watch?”
“No, you can’t,” Myles said.
Christian pouted. “Fine. Nolan, where’s Brett?”
“He’s in the kitchen.” Nolan released Elliot and turned toward the group. “But listen up. After checking the lake sensors, we met with Baz. He’s up at the cabin right now, and we have to take a drive out. He has news.”
“News about the gator-worms?” Tim brightened. “About who’s behind it?”
“Possibly.” Nolan nodded. “He wants us there ASAP.”
“I have to go to work,” Myles said. “And Christian, you should probably skip it.”
“Yeah.” Christian looked at the floor. “Can you guys live without me?”
“Sure,” Nolan said. “We’ll fill you in after.”
“Why can’t Christian go?” Tim asked.
Everyone grew very quiet.
“What? What did I say?”
Sighing, Christian shook his head. “Baz is physically attracted to me. It makes things complicated. That’s all you need to know.”
Tim snickered before he could stop himself.
“Yeah, yeah,” Christian said. “Hysterical. Now button your lip.”
“Why would the alien be attracted to you?”
“Because I’m irresistible, I don’t know, Tim. Moving on.”
“Why can’t Baz just come here?” Elliot asked. “Why do the lot of us have to truck all the way up to the cabin?”
“Because he’s going to have guests,” Nolan said. “And there are restrictions as to where they can go and for how long. There will be a ship up above the cabin, ready to pull them out if they need to for any reason.”
“A...spaceship?” Tim asked.
“Don’t worry, you won’t be able to see it,” Nolan said. “Anyway, Baz says it’s important, that there are things we need to see and hear. And his guests speak English so he won’t have to translate.”
“Whoa, whoa, hang on.” Tyler held his hands up. “What fucking guests? Who?”
“A couple of hybrids that work for him.” Nolan shrugged. “The way he described them, they sound kind of like interns or something. He called them ‘third-generation’ then rolled his eyes. I’m assuming they’re younger than him.”
“And they speak English?” Tim’s eyes widened. “Are they the ones who’ve been stalking me?”
“I don’t know, but Baz definitely knows them personally,” Nolan said. “He made it sound like he’s either their boss or teacher or both.”
“Oh boy,” Elliot said. “Baz gonna have his big white foot in his mouth if it turns out Tim’s stalker was someone he knows personally. After all that ‘Hybrids do not do this, no to spy’ insistence.”
Tyler shook his head. “This plan is not okay, I don’t approve it.”
Nolan groaned. “Why the fuck not? We’re finally getting somewhere!”
“Unfamiliar hybrids with no prep time? No details? We know nothing about these other hybrids or if they’re dangerous, Nolan.”
“Brett said you’d say that, and that you can bring your stunners, but Baz insists they’re not dangerous, just fuck-ups. Baz is pissed off at these two interns for some reason. Sounds like they’re in trouble. Though I’m not sure what being in trouble with Baz entails. He’s a pretty mellow dude.”
“He can get mad sometimes,” Christian said. “His temper doesn’t flare up much, but when it does, oh boy.”
Tim looked at Tyler. “If this can lead to answers it’s a good thing, Ty. Right?”
Tyler held Tim’s gaze for a long moment, then looked at Nolan. “I don’t like this. And I definitely don’t think Tim should go.”
“What?” Tim laughed. “This is what I’ve been waiting for. To find out who’s been doing this to me. Why shouldn’t I go if these hybrids have information?”
“We can fill you in after the meeting,” Tyler said. “Without risking your safety.”
“Baz said Tim should be there, Tyler,” Nolan said. “He mentioned him by name.”
“Baz isn’t in charge of security for this mission, I am,” Tyler said. “He wants to bring in two unknown hybrids who have knowledge of this threat, and we’re supposed to just accept they’re not dangerous? Baz didn’t expect those rogue hybrids to take over the base over a year ago either, he was caught off-guard, so I’m not willing to put all my faith in his judgement.”
“Hey!” Elliot stepped forward. “Baz almost died escaping from the base to get help back then. I sincerely doubt he’s taking this lightly, and I doubt he’d introduce us to anyone he thought was dangerous. He cares about us.”
Tyler rolled his eyes. “That’s touching, Elliot. But Tim hasn’t got enough experience dealing with ETs. He’s not going.”
“Bullshit I’m not,” Tim said. “This concerns me, I’m going.” He pointed at Nolan. “These guys keep saying I’m part of the team. So am I or not?”
“No,” Tyler said. “You’re not. And you’re staying here.”
“Tyler, I can fucking handle it.”
“You only just started being able to handle seeing Baz without freaking out,” Tyler said. “When dealing with unfamiliar ETs for the first time the situation calls for extreme caution, and you’re an outlier. It’s too risky, you’ll stay here until we come back.”
Blood rushed to Tim’s face. Tyler’s words were hurtful, but mostly they pissed him off. He was stunned Tyler would let that slip. Stunned and humiliated. “I can handle Baz just fine,” he said through clenched teeth. “And the other hybrids.”
“You don’t know that,” Tyler said. “You’re too green, and that’s a risk.”
“My entire life’s been turned upside down,” Tim said. “And I’ve been rolling with it and cooperating and being pretty fucking awesome about it if I do say so myself. I’m in this now, and I’ll go where I damn please.”
“You’ll go where you’re told to go,” Tyler said.
Tim flinched. “I’ll tell you where to go you little shit. Why don’t you go and—”
“Whoa, whoa!” Christian jumped in. “Come on guys, don’t fight. Let’s talk about this.”
“We did just talk about it,” Tyler said. “I’m just doing my job. You’re all going to have to trust my experience. And you are not fucking going, Tim.”
“Tyler, come on,” Elliot said. “You’re overreacting.”
“You don’t get to say that to me!” Tyler pointed at Elliot. “You’re arrogant and you take too many risks and then people get hurt, Elliot!”
“Tyler,” Nolan said. “Stop. That’s enough.”
Tyler spun away. Hands on his hips, his shoulders hunched as he breathed deeply. “I’m sorry, Elliot,” he muttered softly. “I didn’t mean that.”
“It’s okay,” Elliot said. “I get you’re in charge of Tim, Tyler, but Brett’s in charge of us, and he said Tim should go. So call Ogden or do whatever you need to, but make it quick. Baz is waiting for us.”
“Just my two cents, Tyler, there’s no need to involved Ogden,” Nolan said. “He likes us to deal with things on our own if possible. Tim can handle himself. It’s not like he’ll be there alone. Nothing bad will happen.”
Tyler snorted. “And you don’t get to say that to me, Nolan. Not after I had to throw out my favorite shirt because it was covered in your blood.”
“All right, I understand. Just...work it out okay?”
Tim was fuming. “You guys go on, we’ll meet you in the kitchen. I need to speak with Tyler alone for a minute.”
“Okay,” Nolan said. “Let’s give them a minute, guys.”
“I’ve got to go to work,” Myles said. “I’ll call you later, Tim.”
“Okay. Later.”
After everyone left the room, only Tim and Tyler remained. Tyler’s eyes were hard as he turned and stared up at Tim. “We have nothing more to discuss.”
“Why did you do that? Why did you bring up my freak-out over Baz? In front of all those people?”
“It’s my job to protect civilians from hostile ETs. You’re a civilian. And I don’t know if these new ETs we’re supposed to meet are hostile.”
“Baz said they’re not.”
“It’s my job to make that determination myself.”
“You could have pulled me aside and talked about this.”
“You could have listened when I said I don’t want you to go. But you only argued and insisted. I reacted accordingly.”
“But why did you have to betray my trust like that?”
“I’d rather you be alive and not trust me than dead because of me. I’m responsible for you.”
“No.” Tim shook his head. “You’re not responsible for me. I’m responsible for myself. I’m an individual and I make my own decisions, you hear me? And right now, I don’t recognize your authority, Tyler.”
“You have no choice.”
Tim closed in on him and looked him directly in the eye. “I’m going. You want to stop me? You’re gonna have to hit me with that fancy stun-gun you’ve got. I don’t think people will like that. Do you?”
Tyler’s lips tightened. “I don’t want you to have to be around more aliens. I don’t want you to have to deal with that risk. Please. Just let me handle this for you. I have years of training for this exact scenario.”
“I know you do. You told me recently that this is your life. The alien shit. That this is who you are. Remember?”
Scowling, Tyler nodded.
“I told you I want to be part of it. Part of what makes up your life. I know we don’t have time for this full conversation right now, but I have to ask anyway. Do you see this thing between us...do you want us to keep talking when you leave the village?”
“Talking to you...” Tyler’s eyes softened. “The things I’ve said to you, what I’ve shared, you think that’s normal for me? It’s not. I don’t talk to anyone like that. I like having you to talk to. Having you with me. I want...” He let out a frustrated growl. “Sorry,” he said. “My words are getting all tangled up in my head.”
Tim could sense he was speeding too fast toward Tyler’s emotional limits, at least in this conversation. To put him at ease, Tim tried to be as simple and direct as possible. “You want me in your life, Ty?”
“Yes.”
“You’re sure?”
“I don’t say things I’m not sure about.”
“Then Tyler, let me be in your life now. I want to go to Baz’s with you. You say you want me in your life? You gotta let me in.”
He shook his head. “Not like this. Not today.”
“It involves me!”
“I know, but that doesn’t mean you to have to take risks,” Tyler said. “Not while I’m here.”
“Tyler, this shit showed up on my mountain. It came to me. It wasn’t your fault because you weren’t even around. This is my alien shit-show now. And I want to be there to get answers, with everyone else.”
“You can get your answers when we come back from the meeting.”
“Stop treating me like the weak link! I’ve got enough problems with my standing in this group! You’re only making it worse by acting like I’m made of porcelain in front of the other guys. I’m not fucking weak, Tyler! I can handle being at your side. I...I want to be at your side.”
Tyler turned away. He sat in one of the recliners and hung his head. “The last time we dealt with unfamiliar hybrids, Nolan almost died. Nolan. Who Ogden calls the best soldier he’s ever seen.”
Tim crept over and knelt down before him. “That was a dangerous mission. From what Nolan just said, this is only going to be a conversation.”
Tyler blinked then looked into Tim’s eyes. “Have you ever been covered in someone else’s blood?”
Sighing, Tim said, “Don’t go all creepy robot soldier. You know very well I’ve never been covered in someone else’s blood.”
“Well, I have. More times than you know. And I don’t ever, ever want that blood to be yours.”
“Tyler...”
“Those guys are too trusting, too impulsive. They give the benefit of the doubt too often, even Ogden said so. They let their personal feelings get in the way.”
“Sounds like maybe you’re the one letting your personal feelings get in the way this time.”
“I’m doing my job.”
“Is it your job to say shitty things to me in front of the others to piss me off? Because it did piss me off, Tyler. I’m really mad at you right now.”
Tyler frowned. “I don’t want you mad at me. But when it comes to my job, I only know one way to do things. The safest way possible. And that means not putting people in unnecessary danger. It’s not personal.”
“Oh really? Then what if it was Myles who wanted to go? Would you protest?”
Tyler looked stumped, eyes shifting back and forth. “I...I don’t know.”
“That’s what I thought. Myles is what you’d call a civilian, right? Like me? Outside of the Ogden dream-team? You’re not just trying to protect people. You’re trying to protect me. And while I find that deeply moving, that’s not what I want to be for you. Someone you always need to protect.”
“Tim—”
“Aliens or not, this is my town, those are my mountains, and this is my life. Not yours. You guys involve Myles in your missions. You trust him. It’s time you put some faith in me too.”
Growling, Tyler rested his face in his hands. “Jesus Christ. How do regular people do this?”
“Do what?”
Tyler’s head lifted. “Get through their daily lives when they feel like this. Worrying about someone else all the time. I...I can’t figure out how to make it work, Tim.”
“Make what work exactly?”
“My instincts, my job, my...everything. I can’t seem to figure out how to care so much about you and still be me.”
Damn. Just when he’d start thinking Tyler was a robot again, he’d stun with some emotionally open confession like this and turn the whole thing on its head. It was dizzying and annoying and wonderful. “Ty...for the record, I care about you too. Don’t you think I worry about the shit you do? Did you expect caring about someone would be easy? It never is. Even for normal people.”
Tyler chuckled. “Thanks, Tim.”
“You know what I mean. It’s hard even for people who don’t have all these alien problems. You can’t expect that this will be smooth sailing all the time, right?”
“I didn’t expect this at all, that’s the problem. I’m not trained for it.”
Tim chuckled. “I think this is one of those learn-as-you-go situations. But Tyler, give yourself some credit. If you’re brave enough to protect the world from monsters you’re brave enough to handle caring about me.”
“One would think so. But I just behaved unprofessionally in front of the group. And I purposely provoked you so you’d want to skip the meeting. I was cruel because I care too much. This...this thing with you?” He shook his head. “It makes me feel all fucked up. I’m not handling it right. I don’t know how.”
“You gonna shut down now?” Tim asked softly. “You finished with this? With me?”
“I don’t want to be. But you’re already mad at me because I said that stupid shit about Baz in front of the group, and I feel shitty as hell about it. And I’m so bad at this I don’t even know how to apologize to you.”
“I think you just did. And I accept your apology.”
Tyler looked up. “Just like that?”
“Just like that. I don’t like what you did, but I understand now why you did it.”
“So...you’re not mad at me anymore?”
“Oh, I’m still mad at you. And I’ll probably get mad at you again, and you’ll probably get mad at me again. But we’ll get over it and we’ll make compromises. Because it’s worth it.” He studied Tyler’s eyes. “At least I think it’s worth it. Do you?”
Tyler took Tim’s hand in his. “Yeah. I do.”
“You sure about that?”
“I’m sure. And to prove it, here’s my first compromise. You stay in the car until I can check out the situation in the cabin. Then you can come inside to the meeting with Baz. Not before.”
Tim nodded. “Deal.”
“Okay. Good.”
“And if things go okay today and there are no emergencies, you’re coming to my house for dinner tonight.”
“I am?”
“You’ve got to eat, right?”
“But you said you’re still mad at me.”
“I am. Do you want to come for dinner or not?”
Grinning, Tyler nodded.
“Okay then. That’s settled.”
Brett stepped into the room. “Hey, guys? We’re ready to go to the cabin. You coming?”
Tyler stood. “I want to bring weapons.”
Laughing, Brett nodded. “I know you do, sweetheart. Don’t worry. Already packed the truck. Let’s go.”
Brett darted out of the room, and Tim and Tyler followed. Tyler let out a long sigh, hanging his head as he walked. “What’s the matter?” Tim asked.
“That discussion with you was very stressful.”
Tim laughed. He slid his arm around Tyler. “I think it’s kind of hilarious that you find personal relationships more stressful than hunting aliens.”
“It’s not hilarious. It’s pathetic and I can’t believe you haven’t told me to fuck off yet.”
As they made their way down the hall, Tim stopped Tyler, pushed him against the wall, and risked a short but passionate kiss. Tyler blinked up at him, expression soft. “I haven’t told you to fuck off yet because I’m not going to,” Tim said. “I really like you, you weirdo. Just the way you are.”
Tyler’s shoulders relaxed. “I think I might actually believe you.”
“You should, because it’s the truth.”
“Let’s go!” Nolan shouted from downstairs. “You can fuck later!”
Without another word, they went outside and piled into Brett’s big SUV with the others. As they headed down the mountain road, Tim stared out the window, wondering about the things Myles said to him. About whether or not he was prepared for the changes that would come if he dated someone on Ogden’s team. If he made Tyler part of his life. And he knew that Myles was right about one thing.
It was already too late to consider consequences. He was falling in love.