Even from fifty yards away, Ben could see Eric scowling at him.

His older brother stuck a pitchfork in the hay he’d been spreading and crossed his arms as Ben pulled up in front of the big red barn behind the house. “I thought maybe you got lost between here and town.” He paused to give Ben a healthy dose of stink eye. “If I would’ve known you were driving to Joplin to do your grocery shopping, I would’ve had you pick up something for dinner on the way.”

Ben snorted. “I didn’t need to cross the state line to do my shopping, thank you very much. And if I would’ve made that thirty-minute drive, I probably wouldn’t have run into Chase Carpenter at the corner store.”

“No shit?” Eric’s eyes went wide. “That’s a name I haven’t heard in forever. When did he get back in town?”

Ben still felt just as surprised as Eric looked. It was even weird to say Chase’s name after all these years, especially since they had been so close growing up. With Eric being four years older than Ben, there were plenty of days—especially during high school—when Ben would see more of Chase than his own family.

That was another time, though. It felt like it could have been another world.

“I don’t know when he got back,” Ben answered, finally, opening the door and stepping out of the truck so he didn’t have to shout every word. “I just ran into him—like, literally, with my shopping cart—at the grocery store. He invited us over for dinner with his parents tonight.”

“Us? Like… you and me?” Eric’s face lit up. “For real? Let’s go.”

Ben frowned. “We can’t go. I already told him we were busy.”

Eric’s face fell. “What? Why? We’re not busy. I’ve been shoveling shit all afternoon and you turn down a chance to go have a nice meal for a change? What’s wrong with you?”

Of course, Eric’s only concern would be getting fed. No thoughts on how awkward it might be to show up at the Carpenters’ house for dinner after not really seeing or talking to any of them in years. No cares given about how Ben might feel about it.

“Nothing is wrong with me.” Ben cleared his throat and shot his brother a dirty look. “I just… he caught me by surprise, that’s all. I mean… don’t you think that might be just a little weird to hang out with Chase and his family after so long? That doesn’t seem strange to you?”

Eric shrugged. “I didn’t really think about it like that, but… I don’t know. I always got along with Jake.”

“When is the last time you even saw Jake? Have you seen him since you graduated? Because I barely have, and I spent practically every day over there when Chase and I were in high school.”

“Oh, yeah, I forgot you guys were that close,” Eric said, conveniently ignoring Ben’s questions. “And you really haven’t talked to him at all since he joined the Marines? Wasn’t that right after you guys graduated?”

Finally, Eric was starting to see the bigger picture.

Maybe.

Chances were he would still be on the road to the Carpenters’ house in a hot minute for a free meal if Ben relented.

But that was not what they were going to do. Not tonight, anyway. And definitely not for some dinner party with God only knows how many other people Ben hadn’t seen or spoken with in nearly a decade.

“No, we haven’t really talked since then,” Ben said, quietly, shuffling his feet on the muddy ground. “I mean, there were a couple of times right after he enlisted. But yeah, it’s been a while.”

“Why are you acting so weird about this?” Eric gave him a funny look, and then his eyes went wide again. “Did you guys ever… you and Chase, I mean…”

“No,” Ben insisted. “No. God, Eric. I just… I can’t help how I feel about the situation, okay?”

Ben had been out of the closet for more than a decade. His parents and brother had been supportive from the very beginning, and it had been a long, long time since Eric had even brought up the subject of Ben’s dating life—or lack thereof, to be more precise.

The fact that he chose to do so now was a little unsettling. Was Ben really acting that flustered about the whole Chase thing? Was he that transparent?

“And how do you feel?” Eric asked. “You do have feelings for Chase, don’t you?”

Ben sighed. Was he really ready to go there? Was Eric really that intrigued?

“Maybe I did at one point,” Ben confessed. “But even if I did, that was a long time ago. Now, I just… we’re different people now. I don’t even know him anymore. I probably wouldn’t have even recognized him if he hadn’t said my name.”

That was a lie. Ben would’ve recognized that smile and those blue eyes anywhere. He’d seen them enough times, even dreamed about them. Yeah, he’d always be able to pick Chase Carpenter out of a lineup, but he didn’t really need to explain all of that to Eric.

Especially since it would confirm what Eric already expected, and that was definitely not something Ben was ready to admit.

Not to Eric, and not even to himself.

“Okay, well… I’m just saying that if you do still have feelings for him, you should tell him while you have a chance.” Eric shrugged. “But that’s all I’m gonna say about it. I know you’ll just do whatever you want anyway.”

“Right now, all I want is to stop talking about Chase,” Ben snapped, walking over to grab the pitchfork Eric had set aside. “Because we still have plenty of work to do, and me whining about something I might have felt almost a decade ago isn’t helping anything.”

Eric put his hands up in a mock surrender. “Fine, hey, I’m just trying to help.”

Ben bit back another rude reply. It really wasn’t worth fighting about, and he knew Eric honestly was just trying to be helpful. His advice might have even made sense.

But that would require Ben to talk to Chase about what happened all those years ago, and… well, that just wasn’t going to happen. Not unless Chase brought it up first.

Even then, Ben wasn’t sure if he’d be ready to hash it out.

He was even less sure it would do any good. Chase was leaving in a couple of weeks. That had apparently already been settled.

If Ben got attached—re-attached—now, he’d just have to forget about Chase all over again.

By the time Ben climbed into bed that night, he was exhausted. He and Eric had worked until the sun had gone completely down, until they could barely see their own hands in front of their faces.

Nothing about the work had been particularly urgent, but Ben had figured that the busier their hands and minds were, the less time Eric would have to question him about things like feelings and boyfriends and Chase.

Chase.

Just when Ben was finally feeling old enough and mature enough to chalk those past feelings up to an impossible teenage crush, just when he was finally over all of the sadness and confusion and what if’s that Chase had left him with, this had to happen.

Chase had to come back, like a nearly forgotten ghost of Ben’s past.

And Ben didn’t have a clue what he was supposed to do about it or how he was supposed to feel.

At least Eric had gone home to his cozy little house across town, where he couldn’t needle and poke and prod at all of the emotions Ben still apparently wore on his sleeve.

Now, Ben was alone in the big, old ranch house.

Alone with his thoughts and feelings and memories of a time when everything had seemed simple.

Uncomplicated.

Easy.

Nothing felt easy anymore, though. Not since Chase had gone. Not since Ben’s parents had been taken away in a senseless car accident.

In fact, it felt more and more like it was just Ben against the world. If Eric hadn’t been around to keep him sane and remind him that they still had work to do and obligations to take care of, Ben might never have left the house again.

He sighed as he stared up at the ceiling. The air in his bedroom was still and hot. Summer in Kansas was in full effect, but the old, overburdened central air unit struggled to keep up.

Ben pushed the sheets down around his waist and then kicked them free of his legs, too.

Nope.

Still hot.

And still thinking about Chase—who also happened to still be hot after all this time.

Whatever kind of hardcore training Marines did had certainly paid off, because Chase looked hot as hell. Maybe even hotter than he had been back then, back when he was already the best looking guy Ben had ever seen.

Chase hadn’t lost a bit of his old charm, either. Ben’s dick twitched at the memory of the moment they recognized each other, when Chase had smiled at him and had looked genuinely excited to see Ben.

Ben thought back to that night eight years ago, how intense the look in Chase’s eyes had been. He felt like Chase could see right into his soul, could see everything he wanted and needed.

Everything else about Chase might have changed—for the better, in Ben’s opinion. He had seemed a little taller, and definitely more muscular. His tanned skin and easy smile were definitely still recognizable, but those eyes…

Ben’s hand roamed over his chest, absently grazing a nipple as he traced tiny circles with the tips of his fingers. His own touch, combined with the memory of those piercing blue eyes sent an electric jolt through Ben’s body.

Drawing a ragged breath, he thought back to the way Chase’s lips had felt—so unbelievably soft, in total contrast to his rugged features and light dusting of the kind of perfect stubble that Ben had been secretly a little jealous of.

His cock was rock-hard, straining against the thin fabric of Ben’s boxer briefs as his hand moved lower over his stomach. He wondered if Chase’s lips still felt the same. If that kiss happened now, would it still send the same tingle up the back of Ben’s spine?

Ben’s cock throbbed as his hand edged closer, as if answering the unspoken question.

Yeah, pretty sure Ben would still get all the tingles in all the places.

He hadn’t meant to think about Chase like that again. He hadn’t even thought about the man at all lately, after so many years of trying to let go of that stupid crush.

But now there was no way he was getting Chase Carpenter out of his head. Just like there was no way he was going to fall asleep without getting off.

His overly active imagination and insistent cock would make sure of that.

Unable to resist the urge any longer, he hooked his thumbs in the waistband of his underwear, raised his hips off the bed, and shoved the constricting material down around his thighs. His cock sprang up, slapping against his stomach.

The head of his cock was already glistening with the evidence of his arousal, and a low moan escaped Ben’s lips as he wrapped his calloused hand around the thick shaft.

Closing his eyes, he tried to imagine what it would feel like if it was Chase’s hand instead, slowly stroking Ben in just the right way to make him come undone.

With his free hand, Ben tweaked his other nipple, rolling it between his thumb and finger as he lost himself in the fantasy. He pumped his hips to meet each long stroke, and he could already feel the climax building inside him as he worked from one nipple to the other, pinching and caressing and rewarding himself with little jolts of pleasure.

He could picture Chase looking at him again, heat in his eyes as he went in for another kiss. This time, though, it wasn’t the sweet, tentative kiss of an uncertain teen. This time, it was hard and possessive, it was impatient and needy—a kiss from a man who knew what he wanted and knew how to take it.

“Oh, God,” Ben groaned, his hips bucking wildly at the thought as he stroked faster, his hand flying over the shaft of his cock.

He was so close.

Ben bit his bottom lip as the orgasm coursed through him, and he couldn’t help but cry out as the first hot jets erupted, spilling over his fist as he thrust his hips upward one final time.

His whole body tensed as he found his release, and he remained perfectly still for several seconds after, just listening to the sound of his own quick breaths filling his otherwise silent room.

Finally, he opened his eyes and took his hand away from his still-hard cock. He needed to get up, to find a towel and wipe himself off.

That could wait a few more minutes, though.

First, he needed to get that sexy, smiling image out of his head. Then he could go back to his normal, uncomplicated life. The one where hot ghosts from his past didn’t just drop in at the grocery store unannounced.

The one where he did what he was supposed to do and knew what to expect.

Chase represented everything Ben couldn’t have and shouldn’t do.

He always had.

And he always would.