CHAPTER TWELVE
CONNOR
The ride was short but tortuous. Having her legs warming my sides, where I wanted to curl them up around my hips and link them together while I turned in the seat and slid my hands down her sexy legs to her hot mound…. Shit, my blue balls and Mr. Stiffy were in pure, frustrating agony over the fact I could feel the heat from her pussy warming my ass. Only it was the front of me throbbing for attention, not my ass.
I’d even stood at an odd angle the entire elevator ride and walk to my apartment, and had to think of the various colors of Ms. H’s granny panties—gross—just so I was able to rein in my manhood.
Once we’d made it through the door, and now that I wouldn’t scare her with my endowment, I needed answers.
I narrowed my eyes. “Who the fuck is he, Lettie?” I clipped through a clenched jaw. I balled my hands into fists at my sides, aching to hit something, mainly the flesh of whoever the jackass was.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Her head tilted slightly, her brow furrowing with confusion. Damn it! She can’t be adorable when I’m mad. That’s not fair.
“Don’t play dumb, Nicolette. I listened to every gut-wrenching word you sang. Who’s the asshole you’re in love with?” I demanded.
She snorted, scoffed, and then even choked on a laugh. Finally, she glared and snapped, “I’m not dumb, but you sure as hell are. I swear you are the stupidest smart person I know. You really need me to spell it out?” She threw her hands up in the air, while her cheeks turned red with anger, or maybe embarrassment. “You, it’s you. It’s always been you, for as long as I can fucking remember. Sad, right? And here’s the kicker. You’re with Fallon. She’s smart, funny, beautiful, and doesn’t come with a shit ton of trouble. Happy? Have your answer? Now, can I go the fuck to bed and pray this is all a bad alcohol-induced dream?”
Fuck, I’m the asshole. How come I’m always the asshole?
Obviously her words knocked the wind out of my sails. “You’re in love with me?”
Lettie’s eyes widened as she obviously realized exactly what she’d admitted to. She opened her mouth, closed it, and took a step back, then another. Her hands came out in front of her before waving me off. She blurted out, “I’m not doing this. I’m going to bed.” She started to turn.
“Not happening.” With unnatural speed, I snatched her wrist and spun her back around. I fenced her in against the back of the living room wall next to my bedroom door.
She gasped. “W-What are you doing?”
“Exactly what I should have done that first day you tried to mow me down in the hall.” I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers. My pulse raced, my body hummed, and my cock sprang straight to hard when she moaned at first touch of my lips against hers. It was the sweetest, softest kiss I’d ever received, and left me wanting more as she pulled away.
“Fallon?” she asked, slightly breathless but determined. I could sense, no feel her hesitance to continue. I tried my best to stay on task and answer her, but it was really hard to concentrate when she kept licking the taste of me from those sexy fucking lips of hers. “Connor? What about your girlfriend? Fallon?”
“Fallon isn’t my girlfriend.” I stepped close again, needing to touch her, so I placed my hands at her waist. She sucked in a breath. Clearing my throat, I went on quickly, “That’s just something tabloids came up with to explain why we hang out so much. We just didn’t refute it because we didn’t give a shit, and her tips were up from the attention.” Reaching up, I tucked her hair behind her ear. Fuck me, I wanted her so bad, but I had to set things right in her mind. “You can call her now and ask her, but chances are she’s fucking Zander and won’t answer. She keeps denying she has feelings for him, but we can all see it plain as the nose on her face. It’s cool though ’cause he’s determined to ride it out till she works through the shit holding her back,” I explained, leaning in to take her lips once more—only her hands came to my chest and she pushed back.
“That was the cute guy in the glasses, right?” she asked, but I only narrowed my eyes and growled in response. I would make damn sure she never saw another man as cute again. She jolted in my arms as my emotions made their way to her through the mate bond.
“You’re jealous,” she announced with awe in her voice. I was going to have to explain the bond and that we were mates to her, but not then. Instead, I needed to claim her. I needed to make her mine. Even if it wasn’t official until the ceremony, I had to show her we were one and belonged together. Just touching her finally, my body felt awakened. Everything bright, alert, and God, I wanted more. To touch, taste, and pleasure every inch of her with my hands and mouth.
“Can I kiss you now?” I all-but groaned, the need becoming severe.
“So no girlfriend?” she clarified, sliding her hands further up my chest, one going over my shoulder and the other into my hair. Her touch was delicious torment; it sent a thrill throughout me. I found it hard to hold back, but managed it somehow. I didn’t want to scare her, so I stopped myself from throwing her to the floor and sliding my dick inside her.
With my voice thicker, rougher from the passion riding me, I explained against her lips, “I’m currently engaged elsewhere. If I could stop screwing up for a hot second, she might just let me kiss her.” I nipped at her bottom lip. “Lettie, I’m sorry I stayed away for so damn long when all I’ve wanted is to hold you like this and tell you everything is going to be okay. I promise you.”
She gasped. “Kiss me.” She didn’t have to tell me twice.
My lip pressed against hers, and this kiss was different from the first. Hot, hard, and filled with passion. It was freeing, she was giving me all into the kiss, gripping at me tightly while I curled my arms around her, holding her close and groaning into the kiss. Gone was the hesitance of before, replaced by a hunger for more.
My hands slid under her shirt to touch the hot smooth skin of her soft hips and stomach. God, I loved a woman who was soft and plump, womanly. I was raised in a time where a woman’s soft curves were meant to be loved. Lettie was tall, with a flat stomach, but still soft not toned, and with an ass that would make an angel cry. Since I had been dying to get my hand on it for months, that was exactly what I did. Sliding my hand beneath the fabric of her panties, never losing contact with her sleek skin, I made my way over both glorious globes.
“Up,” I barked into her mouth, and with a tight grip on her ass, I lifted as she wrapped her long legs around me. I was lucky I locked my damn knees, because she would have downed me when her hot core hit my cock. Even through jeans it felt damn good, causing us both to moan into each other’s mouths.
I needed more.
We moved into my bedroom, and I sat with her astride me. Things took off from there, mostly clothes. She removed my shirt and touched, kissed, nipped my mouth, neck, and chest as I quickly stripped her down to her lacy bra and panties.
I rolled us so she lay beneath me and took a moment. Here she was. I finally had my mate, my Lettie. She was gorgeous, face rosy and eyes alight with passion. Her soft golden curls fanned out around her as she lay in front of me, waiting in a pure white pantie set. It was then I decided I loved that pantie set, and the girl who came… or would soon be coming in it.
I kissed my way down her body and over her mound. Then I softly lapped at the delicious dampness she had created for me. “Lettie, is this for me? Are you wet for me, baby?”
Her only response was to arch her back and moan deeply in the back of her throat. I played a bit longer, biting, sucking, licking, and drawing out the moment before sliding a finger to find her clit, helping her find her release. She screamed my name as her pussy drenched my mouth and tongue. Watching her come undone was something I wanted to see over and over.
Her eyes were hooded, filled with lust, and she was still panting when I made it back up to her mouth again.
“Connor,” she moaned, and gripped me tightly to her. She whimpered against my tongue as I ground down on her with my painfully hard dick. But I wanted to build her up again first; I knew I wouldn’t last long.
I drew aside one of the cups of her bra, curling my hand under and lifting it. I rolled, pinched, and pulled her nipple between my fingers and thumb.
“Connor, more please,” Lettie moaned
With a primal connection, I knew I could never deny my woman’s demands in the thrall of passion, I did the same to her other breast before taking the first one in my mouth. Rolling my tongue at the same time I rolled my hips, I ground down hard on her.
I couldn’t take much more without embarrassing myself.
“Connor, please. I need….”
Thank fuck. I was dying here. I felt her build, searching for release. It was euphoric agony. She was almost there again, and I was afraid my blue balls would explode if I didn’t come this go.
“Are you ready, baby?”
“Yes, please,” she said breathily. Her lips then sought out my own, before she angled down and kissed and nipped at my chest.
I reached one hand between us, pushing her panties firmly aside and lining myself up. At that moment, Lettie found my weakness; she sucked down hard on the soft spot between my neck and collarbone. I moaned and surged mindlessly forward into heaven. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I heard her cry out and call my name as she clung to me, but I was lost in the moment and our bodies. I fell into a fast, hard rhythm that was more force than finesse. As predicted, it didn’t last long, but as soon as my release hit so did her emotions.
Fuck. She was hurt. She was in pain.
My body moved on instinct. I was out and up, holding her in my lap in seconds, looking for injury.
“Where are you hurt? Do you need a doctor? What did I do? Gods, Lettie, I’m so sorry,” I shot off at her in rapid fire.
“Geez, Connor, I’m fine.” She tried to sit up, but I wasn’t having it.
“Damn it! Don’t lie to your mate, Lettie,” I commanded.
She immediately stilled. “I— Mate? I’m not lying. I’m not hurt, Connor,” she answered, her concern taking the edge out of her reply.
I closed my eyes and concentrated on our bond. I sensed uneasiness, love, patience… and discomfort, but not the pain of before. “It seemed that at the height of desire, our emotions overwhelmed our frayed bond link, causing a mental blackout. Falcone warned me earlier tonight that this was a possibility.”
“What the hell are you talking about? What bond?”
Aw, fuck. Did I say that out loud?
“Connor, what mate bond?” she demanded.
I sighed and opened my eyes, keeping my head down, since looking her in the eye wasn’t an option. “See, here’s the thing, baby, turns out you weren’t the only one keeping secrets. I didn’t know how to tell you. We are— Where the hell did that blood come from?” My face snapped to hers. “You said you weren’t hurt.”
She squirmed on my lap, trying to cover up the bloodstained white panties. Her entire body engulfed in a rosy blush. Head to toe. Things began to click together, but the answer seemed outrageous. “Baby, were you a virgin?”
Her cheeks heated, and she glanced away lost for a second in her own thoughts. Shit, if I had known she was pure, I would have taken things slower.
Lettie licked her lips and nodded. My gut clenched. Then she shrugged in a way I thought she was embarrassed by it. Only I was wrong, she was annoyed and her sass showed through in her next words. “Of course I was, Connor. The entire unmarried Order is, you moron. I may have gone to college, but I was examined weekly back home before I was allowed permission to see my dying mother. ‘A high-quality broodmare is a pure one,’ my father used to say.”
Hmm. She kind of has a point. How did I totally miss that? Oh yeah, I’m a fuckup who doesn’t deserve her.
I hung my head again and told her lap, “I don’t deserve you.”
She reached up and cupped my jaw. A teasing smile played on her lips. “Probably not, but since you’re the one I dreamed of to get me through a crappy childhood… I’m willing to overlook a lot.” She shrugged. “So start talking, Mr. Mysterious. What haven’t you told me?”
“I like it when you’re sassy. But I really can’t answer with my mouth full, so you may want to put away those beautiful breasts.” She gasped and sadly righted her bra. “Damn shame.” I sighed at their loss. “Actually, what I have to say is important, and I need to concentrate. We should probably get dressed.” I reached out to stroke her jaw. “I am sorry I was so careless with your first time, baby, but if you will ever have me again after tonight, I promise to take things at your speed and handle you with more care.” I sealed my oath with a kiss.