Chapter Seventeen

Indie

 

 

I woke up alone on my bus in the morning after an awesome show last night. For the first time since I’d joined the tour, I’d spent more time actually watching the show than taking pictures, but I’d snuck out before the after-show shenanigans had begun. Though I had caught a glimpse of Cross searching for something on my way out. I’d stayed in the arena to see Kissing Cinder, then left halfway through their last song to avoid the rush. But if I was being honest, I kind of hoped Cross would be around.

He wasn’t. Or at least I hadn’t seen him but today was a new day, new city.

Instead, I spent a couple of hours going through the pictures I’d taken. I did that as often as I could, shooting for every other day so the image count didn’t become ridiculous. With the portable photo printer, I could make copies of the best ones. It wasn’t quite as good as actually developing my own photos, but digital was just overall easier.

But this was a new day and I wanted to work the settings on my camera and maybe get some picture time in. I got dressed in some comfortable shorts and a T-shirt, then stepped off my bus into the morning light.

I changed some settings, then snapped some pictures. It didn’t matter of what. Just a few test shots to see sit if everything was working correctly. Those looked like shit, so I made a few more changes, then pointed my camera to the left and hit the shutter release button and checked the pictures again. They looked good but I still snapped a few more in the other direction just to make sure. As I turned, I saw three very young looking girls coming off Eric and Dixon’s bus.

Gross.

Then Eric stepped off after them with a far-too-satisfied smirk on his face.

Even grosser.

Then he looked up and saw me with my camera lifted halfway to my face, where it’d become frozen after taking those last pictures. Eric glared at me, his jaw tense, and severe dislike, if not hate, in his eyes.

I sighed. No way did I think he’d understand that I hadn’t meant to take pictures of him and his… medics. His jaw clenched so hard, I thought he might crack his molars as he took the steps down his bus.

Shit. I knew he was coming right for me.

He didn’t get two steps when my dad stepped in, blocking my view of Eric.

“Is now the time to talk?” he asked.

“I didn’t realize you knew the day started this early,” I said back.

Dad chuckled and said, “I occasionally get up before noon.”

“Or have you not been to bed yet?”

Dad smiled but pointed to the bus. I stepped in front of him and he shut the door behind us. This conversation may not have been part of my morning plans, but I couldn’t deny that I was more than happy not to have another run-in with Eric Drinkswine.

“So, Cross?” Dad said after sitting at the little table.

I slid across from him. “Cross Rhodes? From Courting Chaos? What about him?”

“Indie,” Dad said with a shake of his head.

“You know you seem oddly obsessed with him. You’re a good-looking guy, Dad. You might have a chance.”

Dad laughed and rubbed his hand down his face. “You know what I’m talking about. He’s why you were asking what I thought about you dating someone in a band, right?”

“No.”

He folded his arms across his chest and blinked quickly at me. OK. He didn’t believe me.

“He wasn’t. Not exactly.” I wet my lips. “He was the one I used in the example, but I honestly wasn’t thinking about him specifically then.”

“And now?”

I shrugged. “It was just dinner.”

“That’s what he said.”

I groaned and covered my eyes. Once I pulled my hands away, I said, “Oh, man. What did you say to him?”

“If he hurts you, I break his neck.”

“Dad!”

He brushed me off like it wasn’t a big deal, but come on. He couldn’t go around threatening anyone I dated. Well, I guessed he could, but I didn’t want him to.

“It’s what would happen, so I thought it a good idea to give him fair warning.”

“You’re a Neanderthal.”

“I’ve never claimed otherwise, but you’re my daughter. So I’d like to know what’s going on.”

“It was just dinner.” Silence hung between us like we were in a standoff. We sort of were, I supposed. He wanted answers and I didn’t want to admit certain things out loud or even to myself. Yet he’d win, I knew that. “It was. He was a dick to me when we first met.”

“I remember.”

“Right. Well, he took me to dinner to apologize.”

“And?”

I groaned at him. He wasn’t letting me out of this. I shouldn’t have been surprised. He never let me slip through the cracks, even when I wanted him to.

“And, I like him,” I finally said. “All right? Is that what you want to hear? But honestly, we’re just friends. We had fun, but I don’t know if he likes me that way and talking to you about this makes me feel like I’m in high school.”

Dad took a drink of his coffee, then asked, “How’s that?”

“Does he like me? I mean like-like me?” I said back in my best young teenager voice. “It’s ridiculous.”

“All right.” He put a hand up to stop the high-pitch whine of my voice. “You know I have to point out that he’s a musician.”

I gasped and said, “What? You’re kidding me.”

“Ha, ha, smartass. I’m just pointing out the lifestyle he lives. On the road.”

“Etc., etc. Yeah, I know. I didn’t say I want to marry the guy.”

Yet there were questions ruminating in my brain. Questions I wanted to ask but didn’t think I wanted the answers to. I wasn’t sure how I’d handle that. Instead, I raised my eyebrows at Dad and waited.

“Ugh, Indie. No.”

“I didn’t say anything.” I put my hands up in front of me.

“You don’t have to.” He scrubbed a hand over his face which I’d noticed he did a lot when I was around. “You have my face. Or part of it anyway.”

I just continued to stare at him with a small grin and raised eyebrows.

“All right, all right.” He held his hands up in front of him the way I had in front of myself moment before. “I don’t know him that well, obviously. But he seems down-to-Earth. Pretty normal guy, as far as I can tell. Way fucking better than that Drinkswine. I’ve told you most of this before.”

I bit my lip and pushed away the nervous little butterflies flapping around in my stomach. “What about… ?”

“Indie,” he shook his head, “that’s not how this stuff works. I can’t be your spy on the road.”

“I’m not asking you to be.” Scratching my chin gave me a second to decide how best to approach him. “But as you said, I’m your daughter, so if I am starting to like an asshole, you should probably care.”

Dad glared at me, then smiled. He couldn’t resist the daughter card. “He doesn’t seem to be an asshole. I’ve never seen him bring girls backstage or to the bus, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t. I’m not his fucking babysitter.”

“But that’s good enough.”

“Is it?” He leaned in over the table, bringing his face much closer to mine. “Just because he doesn’t bring girls back doesn’t mean he doesn’t indulge in the ones that are there.”

My smile faded into a clenched jaw, thin-lipped grin. Well, that had shot my optimism all to hell. I scrunched up my face at him in disgust. He wasn’t wrong, but I didn’t want to think about that. And that was likely his point. “I guess that’s true, too,” I said.

Dad’s face softened at the drop in my mood, voice, and overall demeanor. “I don’t think he does, though. No more than what your college friends do. Just… can we not let this whole thing interfere with the tour? You know if bad shit goes down, I have to be on your side, but Courting Chaos is good. Really good. I’d like to keep the drama to a minimum.”

“Promise.”

“If you do decide to date him or have a relationship or whatever you guys do, Indie, you also have to be prepared to handle rumors and angry fans and all that bullshit.”

“I know.”

“Do you?”

I knew it from what I’d seen written and said about Dad. “I mean, just from what I’ve seen about you.”

“Exactly. And if Courting Chaos gets as big as I think they’re going to get, that shit will be out there about Cross and all the guys. Can you handle that?”

“It never bothered Mom,” I said to bring this conversation to an end, but I should’ve known better.

“Your mom and I weren’t in a relationship, Indie. She didn’t love me.” He sat back and took another drink before continuing. “If you fell for this guy or, hell, married him, could you handle reading some bullshit on the internet about whom he fucked on the road while you were at home?”

Well, that was a huge dose of reality that I sure as hell didn’t want but probably needed. Could I handle that? I knew the answer without having to think on it.

“If I don’t totally trust a guy, I can’t be in a relationship with him. So, yeah. I could handle it because I’d know it was bullshit. Would it bug me? Sure. Because others might think it’s true. But yeah. I’d be fine.”

That might’ve been the most grown-up thing I’d ever said in my life. Dad sat back and watched me like he was contemplating what I’d said or maybe even me. He ran an index finger over his bottom lip then sighed.

“OK. As long as you know what’s up.”

“I do,” I said with a nod. “And Mom loves you a little bit.”

Dad let out a full belly laugh. They were friends, even if not close friends, but either way, each deeply cared about the other because no matter what happened, they’d gotten me. That was what they told me anyway. Though I told them I must’ve been more than they bargained for because neither had any other kids. I was an only child on both sides.

We both got up at the same time and Dad pulled me into his arms, squeezing ridiculously tight. Then he dropped a kiss on the top of my head and said something about needing to get some more sleep before he left the bus.

I packed up my things and decided to go find Cross to apologize for my father’s threats.

And hoped to avoid Eric Drinkswine in the process.