Chapter 22: Patrick
“Are you excited for next week’s vegetable?” God, I was such a moron. I had spent all weekend agonizing over it. Natalie’s face winced after I said it, but she pulled herself together and giggled how if I gave her broccoli she might die.
That was all I’d said, after we did that. But what was that? Something had come over me, and I had wanted my time with Natalie to be special.
Kissing girls had never meant much to me; it was a required step to get to the final act. But Natalie’s lips looked like silk. Once I was able to kiss her, I couldn’t stop. Not only were they soft, but she tasted amazing.
When we were having sex, it felt like the two of us were in a bubble. A refuge created just for the two of us. If I went too fast, I would burst it, shattering everything we had. Every movement was gentle, because I wanted us to stay in the bubble forever.
Did I make love to her? The thought made me freeze in place. Surely, that wasn’t what it was. I made a mental note to borrow a chick flick from Scotty’s apartment, for research purposes.
I was still rooted to the office floor, lost in thought. Dave’s voice—it had a distinct, nasally tone—made me look up. He was standing in the doorway of Natalie’s office.
“If you were about to go to lunch, I thought I could go with you.”
His statement made my blood boil. I didn’t want Dave seeing the special messages I left her—those were only for Nat and me. If I was being honest, I didn’t want him going to lunch with her at all. But Natalie was in her office, so I couldn’t hear her response.
“Are you sure? It’s already one o’clock.”
Relief flooded my body. I had been pretty sure she would say no, but I still didn’t like the idea of the two going to lunch together. It was obvious Dave had a crush on Natalie. He went by her office every day to talk. And by talk, I meant annoy Natalie. The faces she made during their conversations made it obvious she didn’t want anything to do with him.
“I’m just worried about…” Dave continued, trying to get Natalie to go to lunch.
His persistence irritated me, and I stormed over to Natalie’s door. “Actually, Natalie was going to take me to the blood drive today. I’ve never been to one before.”
A companywide blood drive was being held on the first floor today. When the two of us were at Vertigo, she’d said she was going to donate. I hadn’t seen her leave yet, so my invitation would give her the perfect opportunity for an out, assuming she caught on.
She looked confused at first, but finally realized my plan. “Right. Sorry, Patrick, I almost forgot.”
“It’s okay. Is now a good time for you?” I asked.
“Yes.” She grabbed her purse as she stood up. “Sorry about that, Dave.”
“Oh, it’s okay. I’ll see you later.” Dave slinked back to the marketing department in defeat.
Natalie and I stood in silence until he was out of earshot. I couldn’t help but notice how damn cute she looked. Her grey, slim fit pant suit hugged every curve of her body. It was the perfect mix of sexy and professional.
“Thank you.” She exhaled in relief. “He just doesn’t get the hint sometimes.”
“It’s all good.” I paused. “So, are you actually going to the blood drive?” Of course, I knew she was going. I wanted to see if she would tell Patrick, not Major.
“Yes, actually. Have you really not been to one before?”
“I haven’t.”
“Are you afraid of needles?”
I tried to not flinch. “Nope.”
“You are! Mr. Charisma is afraid of a pin prick.” She sighed and put her purse over her shoulder. “You should pick a different persona.”
“I’m not afraid of needles, I just don’t like the sight of blood. And I pull off Mr. Charisma very well, thank you.”
“Uh huh.”
She looked so damn cute, just standing there in what she thought was her rightness. I didn’t care how much I didn’t like the sight of blood. There was no way I would be emasculated in front of her.
“So, are we going to the blood drive?” I motioned to the door.
She raised her eyebrows. “Yeah. Let me just get my lunch. Um, you can just wait by the elevators.”
I knew why she didn’t want me to go with her to the breakroom. She wanted to read the note I—well, Major—left for her. Natalie wouldn’t want to risk me seeing it and asking questions. If she only knew that second brownie was in my office drawer, waiting to be eaten.
I watched her open her lunch through the glass windows of the break room. A giant smile spread across her face when she read the note I had written:
No broccoli. Yet.
-M
It was attached to a bag of peas. I wasn’t completely heartless, so I had lightly seasoned them. But I planned on lessening the seasoning each day, until she would eat them plain.
As I watched her with that stupid grin on her face, I couldn’t help but wish she would look at me that way. She did, technically. But I want her to look at me like that, and not Major. Unfortunately, it would never happen. Natalie thought of me as a friend, maybe less. We had disliked each other for the longest time. It would be such a disappointment to figure out the man she was crazy about was the same man she couldn’t stand. I sighed and rubbed the sole of my shoe against the floor.
“Ready.” She had reappeared next to me and was peering into her bag of peas.
“Are you that excited to eat your vegetables?” I stabbed the down arrow on the elevator.
“I suppose so.”
I covered my hand with my mouth to hide the smile spreading across my face. If I looked at her, I might not be able to contain myself.
“Something funny about that?” She narrowed her eyes at me.
“Not at all.”
There was an uncomfortable silence between us as we stood in the elevator. We were both trying to figure out what the hell we should talk about. Natalie and I didn’t have long conversations at work, excluding meetings. We’d never had water cooler conversations, because that was not what Natalie liked to do.
“So, how often do you donate blood?” I asked, trying to make conversation.
“I have O negative, so as often as I can.”
“Sorry, what does that mean?”
“Any blood type can receive their own, or O negative. It’s a universal donor. Since I can help anyone who is in need of blood, I feel bad when I don’t donate.”
I was stunned. This was the first time she’d offered that type of information about herself. It was the sort of thing she would tell Major, not Patrick. “That’s very nice of you.”
“Thanks.” The elevator opened, and we stepped out. “I just have to worry about you passing out when they draw your blood.” She snickered.
“Will you hold my hand?” I was only half joking. The contents of my stomach had begun to shift at the idea of having a needle inserted in my skin. If I fainted or puked in front of my coworkers, especially Natalie, I might die of embarrassment.
“You wish.”
“Dream killer.”
I was stunned again when she let out a small giggle. She laughed in front of somebody other than Major. Wait, was I jealous of myself? Having two identities could be difficult.
“You ready?”
“I was born ready.” I shot her a smile, but my heart was actually pounding.
She saw right through it. “I’ll catch you when you pass out.”
We sat in folding chairs as I filled out paperwork for a donor registration card. Natalie had a card from previous donations, so she waited as I scribbled my information on multiple forms. I thought it was too much information for just removing blood from my body, but I supposed I shouldn’t question it.
We were called in for mini-physicals after the paperwork was finished. Small partitions had been set up to give a sense of privacy, but it didn’t do much good. I heard a man next to me talking about the history of diabetes in his family.
A practitioner greeted me and began to ask about my health history. I had broken a bone when I was eight, but other than that I had no health complications. The two of us didn’t talk after, and the only noise that filled the cubicle was the gentle hum of the machine taking my blood pressure.
I heard Natalie when she entered the neighboring cubicle. Her practitioner asked about her medical history, in which there was nothing notable. When she was asked about her family history, my stomach twisted. Hearing her repeat the story of her aunt—albeit medically—made me hurt for her again.
Natalie explained that both her grandparents on her aunt’s side had died from cancer, which I was unaware of. I wondered if she worries she’d get cancer. With three deaths in her immediate family, it was a legitimate concern. Her father’s side had no medical problems, but that was only fifty percent of her genes.
“You can go now. They’ll call your name.” The practitioner dismissed me, leaving the cubicle open for someone else.
I bit my lip as I waited for Natalie to come out. It was times like these I wanted to pull her close and whisper that everything would be okay. Unfortunately, only Major was able to do that.
“Ready?”
A cool sweat pooled on the back of my neck, and I readjusted my collar. “Of course.”
They called our names at the same time. Natalie stood immediately, but I was rooted to my chair.
“Patrick?”
“Um, yeah.”
“If you’re scared, you don’t have to do it.” She put her hand on my shoulder. I wanted to pull her into my lap like I normally would—but she didn’t know it was me behind the mask.
“No, I already signed up.” I stood, trying not to show how wobbly my stance was.
“Do you want to watch me first? That way you’ll see they’re not draining all of your blood.”
“Yeah! I mean yeah. Let’s do that.”
I followed Natalie to the donation area and she talked to the phlebotomist about what we wanted to do. The phlebotomist shrugged and led the two of us to a makeshift room.
Natalie sat in the chair used to draw blood while I sat on a stool next to her. She flipped her wrist upwards, exposing the delicate vein where her arm bent. I watched as the phlebotomist took a piece of rubber band-like material and tied her upper arm, presumably to change her blood flow. She flicked at the crook of Natalie’s arm, trying to find a prominent vein.
Natalie didn’t flinch as she eased the needle in. “See, not bad at all.”
“Right…”
I didn’t watch the blood coming out of her arm. Instead, I focused on her face. She was absolutely beautiful when her face softened. Natalie put on a hard exterior when she was working. It was a combination of wanting to be taken seriously and her past. She was still pretty while wearing the cold look, but when she relaxed, she was the most beautiful girl in the world.
“Are you alright?” Natalie waved her unoccupied arm in front of my face.
“I’m okay.”
“Alright, we’re finished up.” The phlebotomist eased the needle out of Natalie’s skin. “Are you ready?”
“Yes.” With great difficulty, I switched seats with Natalie.
She smiled at me. “You’re going to be fine.”
The phlebotomist began to clean my skin with antiseptic, and the cool liquid sent a shiver through my body. “Are you sure about that?”
“Yes. Unless you still need me to hold your hand,” she snickered.
“Yes. Hold it.”
“Are you serious?”
I grabbed her hand instead of responding. My fingers intertwined with hers and I pulled her hand close to my body. Hopefully, I wasn’t cutting off the circulation in her hand with how hard I was gripping it. But right now, holding it was the only thing that would make me feel better.
Natalie sensed my fear as the phlebotomist flicked at my veins.
“You better not tell the girls in HR. They’ll be jealous.” Her ridiculous statement actually made me laugh. “No really,” she continued. “You have a fan club down there.”
If she only knew I was her fan club. I was so transfixed on her I barely felt the prick of the needle entering my skin.
“Shame. None of them are my type.”
“Well, that’s going to break Kristen’s heart.” She tapped her chin with her free hand.
“What?”
“Oh, she always presses me for information about you. She’s your number one fan.” She looked a bit distressed. “How am I going to let her know? Crap, I wasn’t supposed to tell you about her crush too.” The troubled look on her face seemed to get worse.
I saw the phlebotomist raise her eyebrow out of the corner of my eye. The situation probably did look strange, though. Natalie was holding my hand while she talked about other girls that had a crush on me. I could only imagine the look that would be on the phlebotomist’s face if she knew the rest of our story.
“It doesn’t matter. Just lie and say I have a girlfriend.”
She bit her lip. “Fine.”
“It’s better than telling her I’m not attracted to her.”
“True.”
I was beginning to feel dizzy. It could have been from the blood loss, or maybe I had been staring at Natalie too long. Either way, the world was starting to sway back and forth.
“Are you okay?” Natalie put her hand on the side of my face.
I opened my mouth to respond, but the phlebotomist interrupted my sentence. “All done! You survived.” She pushed gauze where the needle prick was and wrapped my arm.
“Barely.” I pressed my hand to my forehead, waiting for my vision to steady.
“I’ll just give you two a minute to recover.” She nodded and excused herself.
“You can let go of my hand now.”
Natalie shook it a bit, reminding me of my death grip. I could let go of it, but I didn’t want to. What I wanted to do was pull her into my lap and spend the rest of the day with her. I reluctantly released her hand from mine.
“Oh, yeah.”
Natalie reached into her lunchbox and took out her peas. The blood drive had been chaos, and she hadn’t found time to eat them. She stuck a spoon in the bag and pulled a few out. I watched her examine them, as if they were a lab specimen instead of a vegetable.
“They won’t bite you know. They’re just vegetables.”
“Yeah.” She rolled the peas around in the spoon. “I just don’t like them very much. My… friend is trying to get me to eat more.”
I was slightly insulted she used the word friend to describe me. But it wasn’t like she could say “lover from a sex club.” “Do you want me to take a bite first?”
“No! I mean, no. Germs.”
Germs weren’t the reason why she didn’t want to give me a bite. Natalie didn’t want to share anything Major had given her.
“Mmm, okay.” I watched her face contort as she shoved the spoonful of peas in her mouth.