In my bedroom, I change into nondescript clothes. I braid my hair over one shoulder and pull on a hat. On my way to the entry of the castle, I make a detour. Down to the fourth floor. Through a passageway. And then a huge space opens up.

It’s the size of a ballroom, but there isn’t anything in it. The stone floors stretch out before me. Three of the walls are unadorned. The room is plain, really.

But I turn to the fourth wall, and a feeling of…immenseness washes over me.

There is a mural on this wall. It’s massive considering the ceiling stretches twenty, maybe twenty-five feet high, and a hundred feet wide.

Painted over seventeen hundred years ago, it is a massive family tree.

At the top is mine and Cyrus’ names. Just below that was our sons’, but it’s now covered with angry black paint streaks, forever crossed out from our history.

Below that there are all of our grandchildren, each of their names blotted out as well, with the exception of Dorian and Malachi.

Every one of their children branches off from them. So many names, so many faces I can recall.

There are each and every one of my fathers throughout time. Helda’s. Edith’s. La’ei’s.

Our DNA may be far scattered, with such variation you’d have to dig deep to find the common denominator of Cyrus and I. But here’s the evidence. That we’re all connected, we’re all family in some distant way.

I feel the two voices inside myself in awe. Logan is amazed, overwhelmed at the size and spread of all of these blood descendants.

Sevan feels such a surge of love and protection for them. These are her heirs. The result of a terrifying night of stripped-away will, and then a few years of being a happy, though complicated, family.

I clutch my hands to my heart as I search this wall, taking in all of the names that have been added through time.

With a breath, I turn, and head back through the castle. I walk out the front gates onto the road that leads straight down into the town.

It’s a quiet night. Despite the fact that it’s beautiful weather, warm and comfortable, not a cloud in the sky, there aren’t many people out. It’s dark now, the beginning of our day. But the streets aren’t filled. Most seem to still be in their homes.

The shops are quiet as I pass them. The eateries are largely unoccupied.

I don’t mind. It’s less risk I will be spotted. It means I can just reflect on our town that Cyrus and I built together.

I walk down the road and hit the tee at the lake’s edge. To the right it rounds the lake, more homes and businesses set off to the side of it, and eventually it goes to the canyon that is the main outlet to the outside world.

To the left, it cuts toward the fields and farms that support the town. The homes are spread out further.

There is a trail that loops around the lake, and it’s to that I set my course.

I think back as I walk. To what this place was when Cyrus and I first arrived. It was covered in snow. The remaining buildings had been toppled, the homes burned to the ground. The castle still stood, but it had been mostly gutted.

We learned centuries later that this town had been invaded once and the inhabitants killed.

No one had ever come back to reclaim it. No one ever traveled the road our direction. Roter Himmel is remote, over an hour’s drive to the nearest town. We are not located on any map. So here, we have been safe for centuries.

But all that is threatened now.

I feel like a greedy king as I pull myself up onto a large rock at the lake’s edge. Cyrus and I have ruled for a long, long time. Maybe someone else would do a better job. Would be a better ruler.

But after doing things our way for so long, it’s nearly impossible to give up control. I could never, ever trust someone else to lead us and to protect our kind.

“Did you ever want more?” I asked Cyrus as we walked along this same river’s edge. My hand was in his, his grip strong and secure.

“More what?” Cyrus asked me to clarify.

I looked at him, wearing Shaku’s face. “More children? I know it was an impossibility, but did you ever think about it?”

He looked out at the trail ahead of us, his eyes going dark. “There was too much to think about in those early days to wish for more than just our son,” he said. “Between our changes, between running for our lives, no, I never thought about more children.”

I looked over at the man I’d loved with four different faces now. “It is still possible,” I say, but my words came out quiet. “We know for a fact that you could take a human woman. You could still have more children if you wanted, Cyrus.”

He pulled me to a stop, stepping in front of me so that our faces were very close together. His brows furrowed. “The only thing I desire any longer is to be with you, Sevan. And how could I ever think I would make a good father, after what became of our son?”

I reached up and laced my fingers into his hair. “I have to believe that we come into this world with our own ideas and desires. I do not think what happened to our son was entirely because of us.”

Cyrus reached up, palming my jaw and brushing his thumb over my cheek. “Let me be very clear, im yndmisht srtov. I have never wanted more children. I would never, ever lie with another woman. You and I, it is all I have ever wanted. And what we have built here?” He looks up, his eyes searching for the small town off in the distance. “This is our legacy. All of these people here. They are our family. They are our blood. And I have never wanted anything more.”

I smiled as I looked up into his face.

Cyrus was so passionate whenever he spoke. I always believed every word he spoke, because of the way he said the words. With such conviction.

“I love you,” I breathed as I leaned in and kissed him.

“And I love you, Sevan.”

I tuck my knees into my chest, hugging them tight. The air feels cold now. There is no body hugged to mine to keep me warm. There’s just me, on this rock, in this incredible town that I love.

I look back on it now, and my heart feels heavy. Because come morning, during the brightest part of the day, every one of these descendants of mine will quake in fear, thinking the end has arrived.